FabSwingers.com > Forums > Scotland > Using protection
Using protection
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So, a controversial one but I thought I’d gather other people’s thoughts and opinions. I’ve come across so many people recently who just assume that not using a condom is cool with me. Um…like nope. It’s a hard boundary for me. Safe sex only, always.
But my question is, why do people assume that’s okay?! Are most guys assuming of this, or do the majority practice safe sex? I’m genuinely confused. Guys seem unarsed and give it “I get tested regularly anyway” which baffles me, as I will use protection AND get tested, especially being part of a swinging community. Am I too harsh to expect a guy to always use protection?! I just assumed everyone would take the same precautions as me, but the amount that just seem totally unarsed is making me think I’m being overly restrictive?! Thoughts? 😅🙈 |
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By *ee69Man 4 weeks ago
glasgow |
A think it’s down to the individual, a would say it’s probably less off a thought for guys and a lot will try to go bare , a think it’s something that should be decided beforehand with your boundaries set , unfortunately some guys are just tools .
A prefer bare and have been sniped and clean but at end off day a always go with a girls preference |
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"So, a controversial one but I thought I’d gather other people’s thoughts and opinions. I’ve come across so many people recently who just assume that not using a condom is cool with me. Um…like nope. It’s a hard boundary for me. Safe sex only, always.
But my question is, why do people assume that’s okay?! Are most guys assuming of this, or do the majority practice safe sex? I’m genuinely confused. Guys seem unarsed and give it “I get tested regularly anyway” which baffles me, as I will use protection AND get tested, especially being part of a swinging community. Am I too harsh to expect a guy to always use protection?! I just assumed everyone would take the same precautions as me, but the amount that just seem totally unarsed is making me think I’m being overly restrictive?! Thoughts? 😅🙈"
It's not just males tho,females and couples also choose to play this way.
If it's not for you just tell them and move onto the next profile  |
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By (user no longer on site) 4 weeks ago
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"So, a controversial one but I thought I’d gather other people’s thoughts and opinions. I’ve come across so many people recently who just assume that not using a condom is cool with me. Um…like nope. It’s a hard boundary for me. Safe sex only, always.
But my question is, why do people assume that’s okay?! Are most guys assuming of this, or do the majority practice safe sex? I’m genuinely confused. Guys seem unarsed and give it “I get tested regularly anyway” which baffles me, as I will use protection AND get tested, especially being part of a swinging community. Am I too harsh to expect a guy to always use protection?! I just assumed everyone would take the same precautions as me, but the amount that just seem totally unarsed is making me think I’m being overly restrictive?! Thoughts? 😅🙈"
Definitely not over reacting
You do what you think is right and safe
I was with a female 3 months ago and the condom burst, Ok it happens and I was 99.9% that I was fine and she was fine but had that little doubt on my mind. So over a month later I got checked as couldn't shake it off and got the results back and I was all clear, I told the female and she then got a check up and got all clear but the thing is, before all clear there was a that doubt and just had to get checked and I didn't play with anyone sexually until i knew I was clear. I'm single, also have had the snip and clean but I don't advertise it on my profile and it doesn't give me the right to think everyone else is the same or same mindset.
BUT there are many who play bare and then play bare with others constantly and you think WTF
Its really preference and I don't dislike anyone cause they play bare or play safe. If its a must that I must play bare to meet then thats a definite no and I'd move on.  |
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By *un44Man 4 weeks ago
GLASGOW |
"So, a controversial one but I thought I’d gather other people’s thoughts and opinions. I’ve come across so many people recently who just assume that not using a condom is cool with me. Um…like nope. It’s a hard boundary for me. Safe sex only, always.
But my question is, why do people assume that’s okay?! Are most guys assuming of this, or do the majority practice safe sex? I’m genuinely confused. Guys seem unarsed and give it “I get tested regularly anyway” which baffles me, as I will use protection AND get tested, especially being part of a swinging community. Am I too harsh to expect a guy to always use protection?! I just assumed everyone would take the same precautions as me, but the amount that just seem totally unarsed is making me think I’m being overly restrictive?! Thoughts? 😅🙈It's not just males tho,females and couples also choose to play this way.
If it's not for you just tell them and move onto the next profile "
Definitely this, it's your ball and you get to set the rules. If they don't like it then move on. I think guys also think it's like being in a p@rn movie and that's how everyone does it. They probably also have an un_ealistic view on how long it takes a plumber to arrive after you call them  |
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It is an automatic go to for me to come "packing" and expect to be using! I can also understand a number of factors can take place to where some people dont use it but i think most people should always go under the presumption that you will be using protection! |
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"So, a controversial one but I thought I’d gather other people’s thoughts and opinions. I’ve come across so many people recently who just assume that not using a condom is cool with me. Um…like nope. It’s a hard boundary for me. Safe sex only, always.
But my question is, why do people assume that’s okay?! Are most guys assuming of this, or do the majority practice safe sex? I’m genuinely confused. Guys seem unarsed and give it “I get tested regularly anyway” which baffles me, as I will use protection AND get tested, especially being part of a swinging community. Am I too harsh to expect a guy to always use protection?! I just assumed everyone would take the same precautions as me, but the amount that just seem totally unarsed is making me think I’m being overly restrictive?! Thoughts? 😅🙈"
Thank you for sharing, I think this is a great subject to bring up!
People should never assume one way or another, open discussion and dialogue all the way never hurts.
We would never yuck someone else’s yum, it’s personal choice if someone chooses to play bareback. However, as a club we feel it is important to preach and highlight the importance of safe sex.
At our greedy girls events we have safety talks to promote safe sex, and at all events we actively check and encourage the use of condoms and reiterate things like condoms only being 99% effective for the first 10 minutes.
If persons choose not to play safe, provided it’s mutually consensual, that is their own choice.
We know some clubs charge for condoms, and I think in some places it does encourage people to play bare. However, The Ecclesia and I believe every club in Scotland, provide free condoms, lube etc throughout the club.
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It definitely varies, and things like age, schooling, religion etc all play a part in peoples ‘opinion’.
Some it’s their way or no way, majority more accepting of there being more than one right way.
All about personal choice, just choose the right play mate for you x |
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By *hyme2020Woman 4 weeks ago
Glasgow Scotland |
Absolutely always want to practice safe sex. I want to have multiple partners and would only ever have unprotected sex if I was in a steady relationship and both were tested regularly, especially if still wanting to include others. I love the feeling of it being bare, but it’s something I haven’t done for a very long time and I do miss it, but can’t have it all ways. I have come across situations when the man has just assumed bare was ok without even asking and I’m like what do you think you’re doing. It’s not for me but for all those who do, just think how many people you technically are exposed to  |
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Had this very conversation with someone today who thought that the condom was a mood killer and only there because (wait for it…) the woman was too selfish to use birth control!
And this person was someone who not so long ago caught something so exotic the doctors couldn’t determine what it was!! |
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Any and all casual(ish) encounters - condom, always. Yes, they are a pest and I'd much rather they weren't needed but the fact is they are and that's the way it has to be. Just not worth the risk.
In a relationship, it's a matter for discussion and mutual agreement. |
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"So, a controversial one but I thought I’d gather other people’s thoughts and opinions. I’ve come across so many people recently who just assume that not using a condom is cool with me. Um…like nope. It’s a hard boundary for me. Safe sex only, always.
I feel with the community, unless you play with a person regularly and can trust them protection should always be used. Testing should happen regularly too.
But my question is, why do people assume that’s okay?! Are most guys assuming of this, or do the majority practice safe sex? I’m genuinely confused. Guys seem unarsed and give it “I get tested regularly anyway” which baffles me, as I will use protection AND get tested, especially being part of a swinging community. Am I too harsh to expect a guy to always use protection?! I just assumed everyone would take the same precautions as me, but the amount that just seem totally unarsed is making me think I’m being overly restrictive?! Thoughts? 😅🙈"
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Safe fun only no exception
I think a ot of people very dismissive of the health issues of STD it on the rise particularly HIV as a teen of the 80s it scared me no end I know it's not fatal now but you don't want any STD so safe fun |
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By *VLrnTV/TS 4 weeks ago
Scotland |
What are people’s thoughts on protection for oral sex?
Again, I think the assumption is that no protection will be used when sucking a cock but still an easy way for infections to be passed. Is that just being over cautious though? |
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So for me it I would always expect and want to wear protection… I actually find it quite a turn on the process of putting it on especially when both are desperate for that point!!
Anything without would only be when in a a monogamous relationship and both were agreed in correct contraceptive controls and safety…. I would never go bare ever and anyone expecting it should reconsider their decisions |
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"What are people’s thoughts on protection for oral sex?
Again, I think the assumption is that no protection will be used when sucking a cock but still an easy way for infections to be passed. Is that just being over cautious though?"
Definitely not over cautious at all. I think people sometimes sweep this one under the rug, myself included. But I do often think about the risks I’m posing to myself by not using protection for oral. Also, for girl or girl stuff! Never used a female condom or dental dam in my entire life. But I probably should be! |
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I always just expect protection to be an absolute must. Baffling to me that anyone is expecting anything different.
If its agreed to forego it fair enough. But me meeting a new person will always use it |
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By *arah272Woman 4 weeks ago
Edinburgh / Glasgow |
"Condoms are advisable if playing with multiple partners but people forget about the risk with oral sex, as this is just as risky! 🤷♀️
Yes! This! I think about this so often!"
*** When I’ve been tested past few times asked to have oral swab done - it makes sense to get it done even nurse said I don’t know why not for all just now for sex workers x
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"Condoms are advisable if playing with multiple partners but people forget about the risk with oral sex, as this is just as risky! 🤷♀️
Yes! This! I think about this so often!
*** When I’ve been tested past few times asked to have oral swab done - it makes sense to get it done even nurse said I don’t know why not for all just now for sex workers x
"
true best to test regularly |
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By *j2015Couple 3 weeks ago
Glasgow |
Mrs had her tubes tied and we are always condom on for guests and always expect it with no discussion, any assumption is a massive red flag. Our Oral is generally without which i agree carries a risk! Hence why we test (coincidentally got the all clear text today, woohoo  )
But the risk of BB includes HIV and Hep, these are life changers. Unless a Barbacker is abstinent 6months between tests they are fully capable of transmitting these without a positive |
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I am on birth control implant and I test after each partner and test regularly. I've never had ANY STD or STI. I have used condoms and I have not used condoms.
I prefer someone regularly tested who has recent tangible results Vs trusting a condom only.
My only objection is when someone requires protection for sex but will eat any pussy or dick and then want a condom as a requirement and have never been tested and they think they are practicing safe sex. |
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By *j2015Couple 3 weeks ago
Glasgow |
"I am on birth control implant and I test after each partner and test regularly. I've never had ANY STD or STI. I have used condoms and I have not used condoms.
I prefer someone regularly tested who has recent tangible results Vs trusting a condom only.
My only objection is when someone requires protection for sex but will eat any pussy or dick and then want a condom as a requirement and have never been tested and they think they are practicing safe sex."
We agree to an extent there is hypocrisy to oral vs penetration however unless you have and open cut or sore the odds of contacting HIV or Hep via oral is almost undocumented. These are both blood transfered diseases and the 2 that will change your life. This is where we draw our line. We all have our own but its important to know that testing monthly is not a defence against HIV.
NHS will tell you HIV can take 6months for the infection to generate a positive result and you will be a carrier the whole time, this is why PrEP is a must. |
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"I am on birth control implant and I test after each partner and test regularly. I've never had ANY STD or STI. I have used condoms and I have not used condoms.
I prefer someone regularly tested who has recent tangible results Vs trusting a condom only.
My only objection is when someone requires protection for sex but will eat any pussy or dick and then want a condom as a requirement and have never been tested and they think they are practicing safe sex."
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