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Situationship
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By *alcon43 OP Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
Finally found something I can relate to. A situationship is that space between a committed relationship and something that is more than a friendship," explains psychotherapist and author Jonathan Alpert. "Unlike a friends with benefits or relationship, there isn't consensus on what it is."
Anyone else relate to this? |
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Urban Dictionary term for a casual something-or-other is coined every single day. First, there was booty call.
Next friends with benefits,now situationship.
At the end of the day they all are pretty much the same  |
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That could be a useful phrase for anyone getting the, "are you seeing other women?"
A response of, "well, actually I thought we were just in a situationship" could slightly diffuse the situation, albeit briefly! |
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"Urban Dictionary term for a casual something-or-other is coined every single day. First, there was booty call.
Next friends with benefits,now situationship.
At the end of the day they all are pretty much the same "
Exactly. We all find different terms which mean fulfilling our needs. Sad we have to justify this with terms like these though. |
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"Urban Dictionary term for a casual something-or-other is coined every single day. First, there was booty call.
Next friends with benefits,now situationship.
At the end of the day they all are pretty much the same
Exactly. We all find different terms which mean fulfilling our needs. Sad we have to justify this with terms like these though."
Agree !
It is what it is at the end of the day and if people know where they stand then no need for labels . |
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"What makes it more than a booty call or friends with benefits situation ? "
Circumstances.
I'm seeing people regularly, it's more than fwb but due to our circumstances it's not an actual proper relationship so it's somewhere in-between  |
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"What makes it more than a booty call or friends with benefits situation ?
Circumstances.
I'm seeing people regularly, it's more than fwb but due to our circumstances it's not an actual proper relationship so it's somewhere in-between "
It's interesting that you see it as more than fwb. Most explanations I've read online describe it as quite a one sided thing |
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By *alcon43 OP Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
"What makes it more than a booty call or friends with benefits situation ?
Circumstances.
I'm seeing people regularly, it's more than fwb but due to our circumstances it's not an actual proper relationship so it's somewhere in-between
It's interesting that you see it as more than fwb. Most explanations I've read online describe it as quite a one sided thing "
I usually enjoy going out socially with a fwb so it ends up being more than just seeing each other to play. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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From what I've seen it's young people calling a situationship when one wants more but there not in a relationship but they don't walk away from it. Could be wrong though. I'm old. |
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By *hav02Man
over a year ago
Glasgow/London |
It's a new age term, with a fluid configuration.
Ultimately, it's the taking the perks of friendship/fwb and relationship without the commitment. It's temporary until one of the individuals moves on to someone/somewhere else.
So just enjoy being with the person knowing they're not a friend for life |
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" It's a new age term, with a fluid configuration.
Ultimately, it's the taking the perks of friendship/fwb and relationship without the commitment. It's temporary until one of the individuals moves on to someone/somewhere else.
So just enjoy being with the person knowing they're not a friend for life"
so swinging then lol |
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"What makes it more than a booty call or friends with benefits situation ?
Circumstances.
I'm seeing people regularly, it's more than fwb but due to our circumstances it's not an actual proper relationship so it's somewhere in-between
It's interesting that you see it as more than fwb. Most explanations I've read online describe it as quite a one sided thing "
What do you mean 1 sided?
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By *hav02Man
over a year ago
Glasgow/London |
" It's a new age term, with a fluid configuration.
Ultimately, it's the taking the perks of friendship/fwb and relationship without the commitment. It's temporary until one of the individuals moves on to someone/somewhere else.
So just enjoy being with the person knowing they're not a friend for lifeso swinging then lol "
 or swinginationship |
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"From what I've seen it's young people calling a situationship when one wants more but there not in a relationship but they don't walk away from it. Could be wrong though. I'm old."
Could mean allsorts depending on the circumstances . Definitely not 1 sided in my case |
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" It's a new age term, with a fluid configuration.
Ultimately, it's the taking the perks of friendship/fwb and relationship without the commitment. It's temporary until one of the individuals moves on to someone/somewhere else.
So just enjoy being with the person knowing they're not a friend for lifeso swinging then lol
or swinginationship "
 |
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"What makes it more than a booty call or friends with benefits situation ?
Circumstances.
I'm seeing people regularly, it's more than fwb but due to our circumstances it's not an actual proper relationship so it's somewhere in-between
It's interesting that you see it as more than fwb. Most explanations I've read online describe it as quite a one sided thing
I usually enjoy going out socially with a fwb so it ends up being more than just seeing each other to play. "
I thought that's what most folks did with a fwb |
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"This post is confusing lol
As I said in my 1st comment they are all the same thing really . 
Don't agree with that at all. I'm not in a proper relationship and it's certainly more than fwb."
we can beg to differ .
In my head a fwb is someone we call a friend who we can socialise with but have the added benefit of having sex together |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Im confused to, to me a friend with benefits is someone you have sex with but do all the socialising and fun stuff with, whats more than a friends with benefits but less than a actual realtionship? |
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"Im confused to, to me a friend with benefits is someone you have sex with but do all the socialising and fun stuff with, whats more than a friends with benefits but less than a actual realtionship? "
A situationship lol
Fwb shouldn't have any feelings, we do and it's all mutual |
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"Im confused to, to me a friend with benefits is someone you have sex with but do all the socialising and fun stuff with, whats more than a friends with benefits but less than a actual realtionship?
A situationship lol
Fwb shouldn't have any feelings, we do and it's all mutual"
okay this is what I read about it so it’s more or less a situation where one partner wants a relationship but the other doesn’t which is different to what you are saying .
What is the difference between a situationship and friends with benefits?
Whereas FWB involves two consenting adults making a decision around desire, and sexual needs and fulfillment, a situationship is taking advantage of one person's strong desire to have a relationship and leading them on while having sex with them. |
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"Im confused to, to me a friend with benefits is someone you have sex with but do all the socialising and fun stuff with, whats more than a friends with benefits but less than a actual realtionship?
A situationship lol
Fwb shouldn't have any feelings, we do and it's all mutualokay this is what I read about it so it’s more or less a situation where one partner wants a relationship but the other doesn’t which is different to what you are saying .
What is the difference between a situationship and friends with benefits?
Whereas FWB involves two consenting adults making a decision around desire, and sexual needs and fulfillment, a situationship is taking advantage of one person's strong desire to have a relationship and leading them on while having sex with them."
Completely disagree with this, we are in a very happy situationship. No one is leading anyone on in any way, shape or form. We all talk openly about any wants or desires, or any issues-like folk would in a relationship. |
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"Im confused to, to me a friend with benefits is someone you have sex with but do all the socialising and fun stuff with, whats more than a friends with benefits but less than a actual realtionship?
A situationship lol
Fwb shouldn't have any feelings, we do and it's all mutualokay this is what I read about it so it’s more or less a situation where one partner wants a relationship but the other doesn’t which is different to what you are saying .
What is the difference between a situationship and friends with benefits?
Whereas FWB involves two consenting adults making a decision around desire, and sexual needs and fulfillment, a situationship is taking advantage of one person's strong desire to have a relationship and leading them on while having sex with them.
Completely disagree with this, we are in a very happy situationship. No one is leading anyone on in any way, shape or form. We all talk openly about any wants or desires, or any issues-like folk would in a relationship. "
Thats how google explained it to me so I guess most are just making up their own rules to suit the situation they are in |
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"Im confused to, to me a friend with benefits is someone you have sex with but do all the socialising and fun stuff with, whats more than a friends with benefits but less than a actual realtionship?
A situationship lol
Fwb shouldn't have any feelings, we do and it's all mutualokay this is what I read about it so it’s more or less a situation where one partner wants a relationship but the other doesn’t which is different to what you are saying .
What is the difference between a situationship and friends with benefits?
Whereas FWB involves two consenting adults making a decision around desire, and sexual needs and fulfillment, a situationship is taking advantage of one person's strong desire to have a relationship and leading them on while having sex with them.
Completely disagree with this, we are in a very happy situationship. No one is leading anyone on in any way, shape or form. We all talk openly about any wants or desires, or any issues-like folk would in a relationship. Thats how google explained it to me so I guess most are just making up their own rules to suit the situation they are in "
Just like swinging though, there's so many different variations.
My definition is that swinging shouldn't be just be single women playing with single men but many would beg to differ with me on that , we all have our own definitions. |
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By *ola2020Woman
over a year ago
Glasgow |
Sounds like you have/want a Primary.
My primary and I play solo and together but we will always be each others main priority above anyone else. This is as committed as we are without it being a "relationship/situationship"
We create our own rules together for play and talk things over constantly as communication is key and makes it more fun too x |
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To me it's when you are seeing someone and you aren't just fuck buddies but you aren't official. It's usually one of the people is a bit in limbo and don't really know where they stand. I've never heard someone say they are in a situationship as a positive thing. It's usually I was in a situationship for a year or whatever so I moved on. Think the fact situation is in the name makes me think I'm right |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm not sure why things need defined.
Is it for you..or the people.
Who are you explaining it to?
If its something more..than something less.. surely that's a conversation between you both?
I struggle with this need to define things to people.
If you understand each other..be happy..build trust.. ignore everyone else. |
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"Sounds like you have/want a Primary.
My primary and I play solo and together but we will always be each others main priority above anyone else. This is as committed as we are without it being a "relationship/situationship"
Iv never heard that term before actually
We create our own rules together for play and talk things over constantly as communication is key and makes it more fun too x"
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"I'm not sure why things need defined.
Is it for you..or the people.
Who are you explaining it to?
If its something more..than something less.. surely that's a conversation between you both?
I struggle with this need to define things to people.
If you understand each other..be happy..build trust.. ignore everyone else."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In social media (for example TT) a situationship is usually used to describe a relationship without labels, usually because 1 party has more feelings than the other and commitment and communication is a problem. It's commonly seen between men and women and mostly used by younger folk, who have gave it negative connotations
However, adults should be allowed to decide what labels they choose to use and what it means to them. If both parties feel the label works for them and they are both in agreement then I don't see why it's a problem. I'm sure many people can relate  |
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"So it's basically a relationship but nobody wants to call it anything as formal as a relationship so you've made up a situationship."
Sounds like a relationship with a get out clause. For people that want the relationship but not the commitment. |
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"So it's basically a relationship but nobody wants to call it anything as formal as a relationship so you've made up a situationship.
Sounds like a relationship with a get out clause. For people that want the relationship but not the commitment. "
There can be people who want the commitment but many outside factors that can't allow it.
Alot of people use fab as a get out clause anyway. |
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"So it's basically a relationship but nobody wants to call it anything as formal as a relationship so you've made up a situationship.
Sounds like a relationship with a get out clause. For people that want the relationship but not the commitment.
There can be people who want the commitment but many outside factors that can't allow it.
Alot of people use fab as a get out clause anyway. "
I don't think many people use fab for any type of relationship regardless of the label. I may be wrong of course.
Yes a relationship can develop from a regular interaction from here but I'm notbaure people come her looking for a future significant other. |
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"So it's basically a relationship but nobody wants to call it anything as formal as a relationship so you've made up a situationship.
Sounds like a relationship with a get out clause. For people that want the relationship but not the commitment.
There can be people who want the commitment but many outside factors that can't allow it.
Alot of people use fab as a get out clause anyway.
I don't think many people use fab for any type of relationship regardless of the label. I may be wrong of course.
Yes a relationship can develop from a regular interaction from here but I'm notbaure people come her looking for a future significant other. "
I didn't say they came here looking for a relationship. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To me it's when you are seeing someone and you aren't just fuck buddies but you aren't official. It's usually one of the people is a bit in limbo and don't really know where they stand. I've never heard someone say they are in a situationship as a positive thing. It's usually I was in a situationship for a year or whatever so I moved on. Think the fact situation is in the name makes me think I'm right "
you re always right
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"So it's basically a relationship but nobody wants to call it anything as formal as a relationship so you've made up a situationship.
Sounds like a relationship with a get out clause. For people that want the relationship but not the commitment.
There can be people who want the commitment but many outside factors that can't allow it.
Alot of people use fab as a get out clause anyway.
I don't think many people use fab for any type of relationship regardless of the label. I may be wrong of course.
Yes a relationship can develop from a regular interaction from here but I'm notbaure people come her looking for a future significant other.
I didn't say they came here looking for a relationship. "
I didn't say you did say it |
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"So it's basically a relationship but nobody wants to call it anything as formal as a relationship so you've made up a situationship.
Sounds like a relationship with a get out clause. For people that want the relationship but not the commitment.
There can be people who want the commitment but many outside factors that can't allow it.
Alot of people use fab as a get out clause anyway.
I don't think many people use fab for any type of relationship regardless of the label. I may be wrong of course.
Yes a relationship can develop from a regular interaction from here but I'm notbaure people come her looking for a future significant other.
I didn't say they came here looking for a relationship.
I didn't say you did say it"
You are a strange man indeed  |
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"So it's basically a relationship but nobody wants to call it anything as formal as a relationship so you've made up a situationship.
Sounds like a relationship with a get out clause. For people that want the relationship but not the commitment.
There can be people who want the commitment but many outside factors that can't allow it.
Alot of people use fab as a get out clause anyway.
I don't think many people use fab for any type of relationship regardless of the label. I may be wrong of course.
Yes a relationship can develop from a regular interaction from here but I'm notbaure people come her looking for a future significant other.
I didn't say they came here looking for a relationship.
I didn't say you did say it
You are a strange man indeed "
Aww thank you.  |
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"Finally found something I can relate to. A situationship is that space between a committed relationship and something that is more than a friendship," explains psychotherapist and author Jonathan Alpert. "Unlike a friends with benefits or relationship, there isn't consensus on what it is."
Anyone else relate to this? "
I'm a virgo, and Virgo's like adventure! |
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"Finally found something I can relate to. A situationship is that space between a committed relationship and something that is more than a friendship," explains psychotherapist and author Jonathan Alpert. "Unlike a friends with benefits or relationship, there isn't consensus on what it is."
Anyone else relate to this? "
My take on a situationship is more a toxic pernership. If you read further into the explanation.
"A situationship is a form of deception. Where one party believes that they are in a relationship, or building towards a relationship, whereas the other person views it very much as a purely sexual relationship". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why do we need to put labels on everything these days? We are not tins of beans on the supermarket shelf.
If you're in a situationship too long that's where you'll end up"
I'm confused |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why do we need to put labels on everything these days? We are not tins of beans on the supermarket shelf.
If you're in a situationship too long that's where you'll end upI'm confused"
situationship sounds stupid |
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By *alcon43 OP Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
"This need folk have for creating new words,terms or phrasing is to me a sign of madness."
Hi stranger.
It’s certainly got people talking. Opinions are always valued. Some people like having a name for the type of relationship they’re in as it saves confusion and embarrassment.
Even Maltesers are making adverts about ‘companions’  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why do we need to put labels on everything these days? We are not tins of beans on the supermarket shelf.
If you're in a situationship too long that's where you'll end up"
on the shelf? Or just the supermarket shelf? |
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If the shoe fits ,,,,, wear it ,,,,call it what you want |
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"This need folk have for creating new words,terms or phrasing is to me a sign of madness.
Hi stranger.
It’s certainly got people talking. Opinions are always valued. Some people like having a name for the type of relationship they’re in as it saves confusion and embarrassment.
Even Maltesers are making adverts about ‘companions’ "
why hello there my comment is in regards to there are more than enough descriptions available but the need some folk have to generate new "isms" or "ships" or a multitude of other descriptives is just mind boggling to me.
For example this "situationship" seems to be what I know as "seeing someone"  |
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By *alcon43 OP Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
"How's the situationship going OP"
Going well thanks. It’s been three months now since we started seeing each other. Still doing our own thing although I have chosen to not meet anyone new but still meet up with guys I’ve known for a while. He’s going to After Dark with friends and we do tell each other when we have socials or meets planned. Communication is extremely important and something we are good at.
I’m enjoying the pace and intensity if that makes sense.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This sounds even better than FWB and its amazing to see u as happy as u are, sparkle in ur eyes x
Respect that u both do ur own thing with no secrets, as it should be. And agree 100% communication & honesty is the key to any relationship. Xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Overthinking it ... many on here do. Trying to find a pigeon hole or specific 'category' or tribe to gather into. Like everything natural or in nature or human it's completely variable. Let it be. You are you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Op this is a super interesting thread for me. I sporadically meet a fem (met on another community site) who initially wanted to go down the exclusive situationship route. This was partly down to her wanting to explore, push boundaries and do so knowing that neither of us were having other sexual partners. I didn’t mind as I quite like her but it became apparent quickly that she didn’t have time for meets (or perhaps I smell), out of the 3 months I’ve known her we have physically met 5 times which just doesn’t work for anything exclusive so we are just play friends for now.
My opinion of the situationship is that some people like the comfort & reliability a S’ship brings without the pressures of a labelled relationship. But for them to work, it’s a two way street that demands clear communication……which you both seem to have
All the best chum |
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"Op this is a super interesting thread for me. I sporadically meet a fem (met on another community site) who initially wanted to go down the exclusive situationship route. This was partly down to her wanting to explore, push boundaries and do so knowing that neither of us were having other sexual partners. I didn’t mind as I quite like her but it became apparent quickly that she didn’t have time for meets (or perhaps I smell), out of the 3 months I’ve known her we have physically met 5 times which just doesn’t work for anything exclusive so we are just play friends for now.
My opinion of the situationship is that some people like the comfort & reliability a S’ship brings without the pressures of a labelled relationship. But for them to work, it’s a two way street that demands clear communication……which you both seem to have
All the best chum "
Wiw 5 times in three months that's exceptional on fab terms guys cant even commit to once a week.. that's ahead of the curve |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Wiw 5 times in three months that's exceptional on fab terms guys cant even commit to once a week.. that's ahead of the curve"
Ah but that’s because we are both single with no hidden agendas or driven by a need to play the field….which let’s be honest isn’t the case for the mainstay of fab penis owners..
Be more picky is all I can say miss |
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"
Wiw 5 times in three months that's exceptional on fab terms guys cant even commit to once a week.. that's ahead of the curve
Ah but that’s because we are both single with no hidden agendas or driven by a need to play the field….which let’s be honest isn’t the case for the mainstay of fab penis owners..
Be more picky is all I can say miss "
Ohh trust me I'm picky.... that's why I know that's exceptional for fab and why I refuse to take less |
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Why are so many people obsessed with pidgeon_holing everything?
Every dynamic with every person we meet is unique because that person is unique, just like we are.
Let's just rejoice in the nature of individual connections we can make with other human beings and forget the categories.
As long as we're all open and honest about whether we want sexual exclusivity or not, what do labels matter?
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"Why are so many people obsessed with pidgeon_holing everything?
Every dynamic with every person we meet is unique because that person is unique, just like we are.
Let's just rejoice in the nature of individual connections we can make with other human beings and forget the categories.
As long as we're all open and honest about whether we want sexual exclusivity or not, what do labels matter?
"
Whoops... Spelling police!
That should have read " pigeonholing"
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By *alcon43 OP Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
It’s not something I came up with. It is actually a ‘thing’. Try Googling and doing your own research. There’s more to it than just giving it a label’.
It’s a bit like the difference between a fuck buddy and a friend with benefits. Not much difference between them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It’s not something I came up with. It is actually a ‘thing’. Try Googling and doing your own research. There’s more to it than just giving it a label’.
It’s a bit like the difference between a fuck buddy and a friend with benefits. Not much difference between them. "
i am in the opinion if it works for you thats cool |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think all the terminology has had labels slapped on it left and right , if it feels good your more likely to repeat - there's no need to slap a label on it lol "
I’m with you here, when I was asked to enter a s’ship I thought it must be the age gap and my no longer being down with cool terminology.
S’ship in my day was referred to as ‘we are pumping’
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"It’s not something I came up with. It is actually a ‘thing’. Try Googling and doing your own research. There’s more to it than just giving it a label’.
It’s a bit like the difference between a fuck buddy and a friend with benefits. Not much difference between them. "
I totally agree with you.
Most going on about why do you have to label it. It's not about having to, it's about understanding the dynamic and how to describe it to others.
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"It’s not something I came up with. It is actually a ‘thing’. Try Googling and doing your own research. There’s more to it than just giving it a label’.
It’s a bit like the difference between a fuck buddy and a friend with benefits. Not much difference between them.
I totally agree with you.
Most going on about why do you have to label it. It's not about having to, it's about understanding the dynamic and how to describe it to others.
"
Isn't the issue with a situationship that nobody really knows where they stand due to a lack of clear boundaries?
It sounds like a very convenient way of dropping someone on a whim |
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"It’s not something I came up with. It is actually a ‘thing’. Try Googling and doing your own research. There’s more to it than just giving it a label’.
It’s a bit like the difference between a fuck buddy and a friend with benefits. Not much difference between them.
I totally agree with you.
Most going on about why do you have to label it. It's not about having to, it's about understanding the dynamic and how to describe it to others.
Isn't the issue with a situationship that nobody really knows where they stand due to a lack of clear boundaries?
It sounds like a very convenient way of dropping someone on a whim"
Not necessarily. It can be that there are clear boundaries but you can't take it any further. |
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"How's the situationship going OP
Going well thanks. It’s been three months now since we started seeing each other. Still doing our own thing although I have chosen to not meet anyone new but still meet up with guys I’ve known for a while. He’s going to After Dark with friends and we do tell each other when we have socials or meets planned. Communication is extremely important and something we are good at.
I’m enjoying the pace and intensity if that makes sense.
"
I've had shellac on my toes longer than that
The post is 13 weeks old BTW lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Might be a controversial view .. i think folk put labels on a situation to make themselves feel better about the situation and so it seems like there's some form of commitment, surely it's the same as seeing someone . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How's the situationship going OP
Going well thanks. It’s been three months now since we started seeing each other. Still doing our own thing although I have chosen to not meet anyone new but still meet up with guys I’ve known for a while. He’s going to After Dark with friends and we do tell each other when we have socials or meets planned. Communication is extremely important and something we are good at.
I’m enjoying the pace and intensity if that makes sense.
I've had shellac on my toes longer than that
The post is 13 weeks old BTW lol"
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Only my thoughts but here goes.
Should it matter what name or typecast you identify the situation as. Does it matter if people on here agrees or approves. Surely if you are both happy then that's all thar matters. X |
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