"Just seams no politeness anymore, now living in world of me/us. And do understand women/couples probably get some obnoxious messages. Just not me to be that way inclined "
It might seem that way.
However, it's also polite to learn about the culture you're in. Fab are courteous enough to include guidance in their FAQs about why this specific culture does not include replying to say no thank you.
It's very rude to ignore that information and claim you're in the right. Imagine a Yank coming over here and complaining that we drive on the left side of the road.
You're being that Yank right now. |
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"If there was a preset reply where you could multiselect messages and fire a preset reply of that kind and automatically send any future messages to junk… would be useful"
It would work for the likes of me that doesn't get any messages, but for the ladies, in particular, who get sack loads of them, it's just another bit of admin. |
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"If there was a preset reply where you could multiselect messages and fire a preset reply of that kind and automatically send any future messages to junk… would be useful"
Could you imagine the complaints?
I carefully crafted my fancy a fuck, and took my dick pic in perfect light, only to get a form letter!
Back in my day blah blah blah |
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"Is it so hard to say thank you but not for us/me
It’s not hard at all. But it is harder than deleting a message you’re not interested in 👍🏻"
Bingo.
I am advocate for automated responses to tick as you delete a message. Would be so easy to implement as well |
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It is for some who are swamped with messages, yes.
Then you get people who can't take rejection and they get abusive or ask why not et.
I use filters to keep mail low & if someone's read my profile and made an effort in their message, I always reply, even if it's a no thanks.
No reply is a no op. |
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We have tried being polite, but then it turns into
"Whats wrong"
"Why?"
"Give me a try"
And other such messages which eventually lead us to blocking them... sometimes it's just easier to delete and move on |
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"We have tried being polite, but then it turns into
"Whats wrong"
"Why?"
"Give me a try"
And other such messages which eventually lead us to blocking them... sometimes it's just easier to delete and move on "
Or the ones who go straight to things like "I didn't want you anyway, you disease infested slut. No man will ever want you"
Prams. Toy. |
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By *bi HaiveMan 10 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Is it so hard to say thank you but not for us/me
It’s not hard at all. But it is harder than deleting a message you’re not interested in 👍🏻
Bingo.
I am advocate for automated responses to tick as you delete a message. Would be so easy to implement as well "
Does it change the outcome though?
An automated 'no thanks' message = no interest.
No answer = no interest.
Both have the exact same outcome. One requires less action. |
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By *WB85Man 10 weeks ago
Staffordshire |
We used to always reply on our couples account but it often got a rude reply when we weren't interested on someone.
It puts a really negative feeling on the whole process.
So now we just ignore and avoid those situations.
For the record though it's all types of accounts that send rude replies....single men, couples and ladies. |
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"Just seams no politeness anymore, now living in world of me/us. And do understand women/couples probably get some obnoxious messages. Just not me to be that way inclined "
Ahh yes.
You sit online messaging random people to try and get them to to toss your tonker and when they don't reply the world has lost all politeness?
You can't make this shit up!
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"We used to always reply on our couples account but it often got a rude reply when we weren't interested on someone.
It puts a really negative feeling on the whole process.
So now we just ignore and avoid those situations.
For the record though it's all types of accounts that send rude replies....single men, couples and ladies. "
I did an experiment and go with what gets me the least abuse. Which is not replying |
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By *irthandgirthMan 10 weeks ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
"Is it so hard to say thank you but not for us/me"
Read the site rules.
No answer is an answer.
Even a well meaning reply can result in another raft of questions. 'Why not? What could I do to change your mind? But I see by your veris you met so and so, and I am much better than him. Can we be friends? Can I buy you dinner?..
And many of the ladies on here will attest to a gentle refusal resulting in messages such as:
'You are a fat/ugly/skanky/diseased (insert expletive here) I would never meet you.. ' and far worse.
Fragile egos are a thing to behold.
Even if you wouldn't put yourself in either of those categories, the lady doesn't know that. |
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By *riel13Woman 10 weeks ago
Northampton |
Op... When I first joined I wasn't working and had lots of free time.... I didn't sleep for over 24 hours trying to reply to everyone then feeling shit if I left site and lost people due to more messages... Then people would see I was online and I got more messages... I missed out on alot of guys I was possibly interested in trying not to upset guys I wasn't... I usually delete unread now... This is meant to be fun, not hassle |
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No often triggers abuse at worst or attempts to convince at best.
You can then get round any later changes to filters because I’ve messaged you.
Even replying no thanks takes time I don’t have.
The outcome is still the same - it’s a no. Does it feel better to hear it? |
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"I don't think many people want to open up a chain of correspondence where someone persists in trying to change your no to a yes, by debating whether your rationale stands up  "
Oh that's fun.
"Your no means nothing. I need you. I have a bed. I have a bottle of cheap wine. You're going to say yes to me"
That escalates no thank you to something more like "fuck off creep", which they appreciate even less. |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS 10 weeks ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"I don't think many people want to open up a chain of correspondence where someone persists in trying to change your no to a yes, by debating whether your rationale stands up
Oh that's fun.
"Your no means nothing. I need you. I have a bed. I have a bottle of cheap wine. You're going to say yes to me"
That escalates no thank you to something more like "fuck off creep", which they appreciate even less."
Too right.
'It's not that far to travel.'
'We could meet in a layby half way.'
'Well if we were to meet at 4AM, you could do the journey in half the time.'
'What if you get a hotel part way?'
etc, etc, etc until you lose the will to live. |
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"I don't think many people want to open up a chain of correspondence where someone persists in trying to change your no to a yes, by debating whether your rationale stands up
Oh that's fun.
"Your no means nothing. I need you. I have a bed. I have a bottle of cheap wine. You're going to say yes to me"
That escalates no thank you to something more like "fuck off creep", which they appreciate even less.
Too right.
'It's not that far to travel.'
'We could meet in a layby half way.'
'Well if we were to meet at 4AM, you could do the journey in half the time.'
'What if you get a hotel part way?'
etc, etc, etc until you lose the will to live."
The thing they don't understand is, not respecting my no means they've gone from maybe later to never. |
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The reason not replied to other people's comments because actually didn't expect that many,plus it was a genuine statement and not to upset people. What has come to light in my opinion ( and is my opinion and very much noticed on time on fab). Noticed that there's two types of swingers. The first being fun swingers. The second are body/very up there own arse which I seem to of offended. Don't you like the truth |
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"We have tried being polite, but then it turns into
"Whats wrong"
"Why?"
"Give me a try"
And other such messages which eventually lead us to blocking them... sometimes it's just easier to delete and move on
Or the ones who go straight to things like "I didn't want you anyway, you disease infested slut. No man will ever want you"
Prams. Toy."
Yep, we have had all sorts of colourful insults thrown at us after a rejection, it's just not worth it |
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"The reason not replied to other people's comments because actually didn't expect that many,plus it was a genuine statement and not to upset people. What has come to light in my opinion ( and is my opinion and very much noticed on time on fab). Noticed that there's two types of swingers. The first being fun swingers. The second are body/very up there own arse which I seem to of offended. Don't you like the truth "
Oh I'm so sorry. I must make this up to you because I would just die if anyone called me up my own arse. No one has ever tried to manipulate me by telling me this. One sloppy blowjob coming right up!
- said no one ever |
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"A no thanks is a polite rejection is what I was asking suggest put a English language book on your Christmas list "
Did you even read any of what we'd said, about why people don't do that? Or are you just going to insist on getting your own way, no matter what?
And honey I teach with English language books. None of them say anything about catering to people's expectations outside of cultural norms. You might want to try anthropology, and they'll probably tell you you're wrong, too. |
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"A no thanks is a polite rejection is what I was asking suggest put a English language book on your Christmas list "
A no reply is a polite no thanks just without the need to write it hundreds of times a day 🤷🏻♂️ |
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"A no thanks is a polite rejection is what I was asking suggest put a English language book on your Christmas list
A no reply is a polite no thanks just without the need to write it hundreds of times a day 🤷🏻♂️"
Written into the FAQ, and explained for the umpteenth time here just for the OP's benefit.
Which he seems to be ignoring because it isn't what he wants to hear. Which doesn't seem very polite 🤔 |
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"A no thanks is a polite rejection is what I was asking suggest put a English language book on your Christmas list
A no reply is a polite no thanks just without the need to write it hundreds of times a day 🤷🏻♂️
Written into the FAQ, and explained for the umpteenth time here just for the OP's benefit.
Which he seems to be ignoring because it isn't what he wants to hear. Which doesn't seem very polite 🤔"
I'm pretty sure he'd complain about rejection messages if wasn't complaining about not getting a reply |
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"A no thanks is a polite rejection is what I was asking suggest put a English language book on your Christmas list
A no reply is a polite no thanks just without the need to write it hundreds of times a day 🤷🏻♂️
Written into the FAQ, and explained for the umpteenth time here just for the OP's benefit.
Which he seems to be ignoring because it isn't what he wants to hear. Which doesn't seem very polite 🤔
I'm pretty sure he'd complain about rejection messages if wasn't complaining about not getting a reply "
Yes.
But we've gone out of our way to explain why it is as it is, shown evidence, and he's ignored all of it because this isn't about politeness. It's about getting what you want.
World doesn't work that way. |
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"The reason not replied to other people's comments because actually didn't expect that many,plus it was a genuine statement and not to upset people. What has come to light in my opinion ( and is my opinion and very much noticed on time on fab). Noticed that there's two types of swingers. The first being fun swingers. The second are body/very up there own arse which I seem to of offended. Don't you like the truth "
Did someone mentioned pram and toys...
|
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"The reason not replied to other people's comments because actually didn't expect that many,plus it was a genuine statement and not to upset people. What has come to light in my opinion ( and is my opinion and very much noticed on time on fab). Noticed that there's two types of swingers. The first being fun swingers. The second are body/very up there own arse which I seem to of offended. Don't you like the truth
Did someone mentioned pram and toys...
"
Quite 😂 |
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By *ascaIMan 10 weeks ago
Cheshire Liverpool Manchester |
"The reason not replied to other people's comments because actually didn't expect that many,plus it was a genuine statement and not to upset people. What has come to light in my opinion ( and is my opinion and very much noticed on time on fab). Noticed that there's two types of swingers. The first being fun swingers. The second are body/very up there own arse which I seem to of offended. Don't you like the truth "
I can guarantee nobody is offended by this thread. |
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"The reason not replied to other people's comments because actually didn't expect that many,plus it was a genuine statement and not to upset people. What has come to light in my opinion ( and is my opinion and very much noticed on time on fab). Noticed that there's two types of swingers. The first being fun swingers. The second are body/very up there own arse which I seem to of offended. Don't you like the truth
I can guarantee nobody is offended by this thread. "
I am offended, that no one is offended.. 😅 |
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"The reason not replied to other people's comments because actually didn't expect that many,plus it was a genuine statement and not to upset people. What has come to light in my opinion ( and is my opinion and very much noticed on time on fab). Noticed that there's two types of swingers. The first being fun swingers. The second are body/very up there own arse which I seem to of offended. Don't you like the truth
I can guarantee nobody is offended by this thread. "
"Offended" seems to be a buzzword these days when conversations don't go as you were expecting. That and "triggered"
I'm only offended that being triggered, which is a nasty PTSD symptom, has been brought into such puerile understandings of the world. |
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"The reason not replied to other people's comments because actually didn't expect that many,plus it was a genuine statement and not to upset people. What has come to light in my opinion ( and is my opinion and very much noticed on time on fab). Noticed that there's two types of swingers. The first being fun swingers. The second are body/very up there own arse which I seem to of offended. Don't you like the truth
I can guarantee nobody is offended by this thread.
I am offended, that no one is offended.. 😅"
Better tell OP directly before he's offended again |
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"A no thanks is a polite rejection is what I was asking suggest put a English language book on your Christmas list "
You haven't told a "truth" here, though; you've shared an opinion. You think it's rude not to reply to messages, and you've received several responses explaining why it can be rude to expect one, including the FAQ on the very site you're using.
If this is the kind of response you give to people trying to engage with you on a topic, it's no wonder you don't get replies. Might I suggest "an" English language book for your list, as well? |
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