If I give you a wink it is to test the water

Man in Near, Scotland, UK

Joined: over a year ago
Last on: 19 hours ago

Truth is, most people who ignore or are rude to you online will happily fuck you in a club atmosphere. They're just picky online because they act as if it is window shopping for humans.

I'm more about the fun!

Most people are just out to use you to fulfil their perfect fantasy, not to actually interact with you like a real person.. me I'll always turn up for meet clean and And on time...

A woman walks into a pharmacy and tentatively approaches the pharmacist. The pharmacist, seeing her hesitancy, asks if there is anything that he can do for her. She asks him in a quiet voice, "Do you carry extra large condoms?" He points to where they are and asks if she wants to purchase a box. She says, "No, but do you mind if I wait here until someone does?"

Knocking Off:- Two guys Dave and Mick, worked on a building site and the foreman had a habit of knocking off at 2pm and telling the workforce to stay till 7pm. This particular day Mick said to Dave “Sod that. As soon as he goes I’m off. Lets knock it on the head”

As soon as the foreman had given them warning to stay til 7pm and disappeared the two friends knocked off. Dave, worried that his wife would hassle him for not putting the hours in decided to stay away from home and pop to the local swingers club. As he entered he noticed a large crowd were gathered round the voyeur window. Curious, he went and looked into the room to see his wife being spit roasted by the foreman and another guy.

The next day the foreman issued his warning about knocking off before 7pm and left. Mick turned to Dave and said, “Are we knocking off again mate?”

“F*ck off” said Dave “I nearly got caught yesterday!”

Horny Mouse:- A mouse walking through the jungle stumbled across an elephant that was lying on the ground crying. The mouse asked what the problem was an the elephant told him she has a thorn embedded in her foot and couldn’t grab it with her trunk and its was so painful. The mouse told the elephant that with his tiny sharp teeth he could probably get the thorn out and the elephant said she would do anything for the mouse if he did. The mouse then gnawed at the thorn and removed it then said to the elephant “You said I could have anything. I wanna shag ya”

The elephant laughed and agreed then leant against a tree with her arse in the air. The mouse positioned him self behind the elephant on a tree stump and began hammering away like a mad man. The mouse asked the elephant to push back and laughing as she did the elephant obliged and stepped on the thorn again and screamed in pain to which the mouse shouted, “Take it all bitch!”

40 years old, Bisexual

6'0" 183cm
Average
Non smoker
Social drinker
Some tattoos
No piercings

Looking For

Couples (MF) Couples (FF) Women
Aged from 18 to 67
Will meet smokers

Meeting

Cannot accommodate
Can travel

Interests

Adult Parties, Anal, Blindfolds, Cuckolding, Dogging, DP, Gangbangs, Group Sex, Oral, Role Play, Safe Sex, Spanking, Swingers Clubs, Taking Photos, Threesomes, Toys, Voyeurism, Watersports

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