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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Is it just me or does this happen to others?
Iike every other solo man I've sent loads of message,the odd one or two get replied to,a lot get deleted with no reply,the rest have been read,but neither replied to or deleted,some have been sat there for several months,most odd. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No one is obliged to reply as stated in FAQs"
Exactly this.
If they haven’t replied it most likely means they aren’t interested so just move onto the next one!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just me or does this happen to others?
Iike every other solo man I've sent loads of message,the odd one or two get replied to,a lot get deleted with no reply,the rest have been read,but neither replied to or deleted,some have been sat there for several months,most odd."
Yep best not to pay much attention to that info it only serves as a negative |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I read messages on the go sometimes then 2 minutes later I'll often get a 2nd stroppy message because I've not replied 
I'll reply if and when I want to. I am here living my life and not on FAB 24/7 but I'll check in now and then and will reply in full when I have more time. I do sometimes forget though, so I don't mind a follow up message, as long as it's polite. Yes, we're contradictory creatures  |
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"I read messages on the go sometimes then 2 minutes later I'll often get a 2nd stroppy message because I've not replied
I'll reply if and when I want to. I am here living my life and not on FAB 24/7 but I'll check in now and then and will reply in full when I have more time. I do sometimes forget though, so I don't mind a follow up message, as long as it's polite. Yes, we're contradictory creatures "
People don’t understand we have lives outside of Fab! We apparently should devote 24/7 to Fab. |
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As said above.
The only thing that consufuses me, are those that read messages and don’t even look at profiles. Assuming I match with what they say they’re looking for ie age, gender etc etc
Why not read the profile to see if there’s interest?
I never write big wordy messages, just a few lines, hopefully commenting on something that have said on the profile.
Bearing in mind, the approach I take works very well elsewhere, so what’s different here? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As said above.
The only thing that consufuses me, are those that read messages and don’t even look at profiles. Assuming I match with what they say they’re looking for ie age, gender etc etc
Why not read the profile to see if there’s interest?
I never write big wordy messages, just a few lines, hopefully commenting on something that have said on the profile.
Bearing in mind, the approach I take works very well elsewhere, so what’s different here?"
I have that turned off because I prefer the privacy of looking at a profile because as soon as you do, it's sometimes confused with interest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As said above.
The only thing that consufuses me, are those that read messages and don’t even look at profiles. Assuming I match with what they say they’re looking for ie age, gender etc etc
Why not read the profile to see if there’s interest?
I never write big wordy messages, just a few lines, hopefully commenting on something that have said on the profile.
Bearing in mind, the approach I take works very well elsewhere, so what’s different here?"
I don’t need to look at a profile to know I’m not interested.
A message alone can tell me all I need to know and any pictures they send, or zooming into their profile pic is enough.
Matching with their preferences such as age & gender doesn’t automatically mean you’re what they’re after.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s pretty normal. Even though I generally reply to most messages I’ll admit I’ve read and then never responded. Sometimes it’s a mood things, or I’m busy or just don’t like their profile. But same happens to me too. I’ll be mid conversation with some and then the message just sits unread for all of eternity. I do however find a lot of women on here quite dismissive. That puts me right off. |
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"I read messages on the go sometimes then 2 minutes later I'll often get a 2nd stroppy message because I've not replied
I'll reply if and when I want to. I am here living my life and not on FAB 24/7 but I'll check in now and then and will reply in full when I have more time. I do sometimes forget though, so I don't mind a follow up message, as long as it's polite. Yes, we're contradictory creatures
People don’t understand we have lives outside of Fab! We apparently should devote 24/7 to Fab. "
Damn I missed that memo lol |
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"Is it just me or does this happen to others?
Iike every other solo man I've sent loads of message,the odd one or two get replied to,a lot get deleted with no reply,the rest have been read,but neither replied to or deleted,some have been sat there for several months,most odd."
Wouldn’t it have been fun if no one would have replied that this post 
And OP as a single Male on here I’d say a very high percent of men receive the same or should I say don’t receive messages
It is the norm in here so don’t take it too personal it is what it is  |
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I've just posted a similar reply in another thread. Women get hundreds more messages than us men as we outnumber them by a big margin. Plus people do have lives away from this site and aren't on here 24/7. Don't take it personally if your message is not read or read and not replied to. Just keep moving on until you connect with someone. |
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"As said above.
The only thing that consufuses me, are those that read messages and don’t even look at profiles. Assuming I match with what they say they’re looking for ie age, gender etc etc
Why not read the profile to see if there’s interest?
I never write big wordy messages, just a few lines, hopefully commenting on something that have said on the profile.
Bearing in mind, the approach I take works very well elsewhere, so what’s different here?
I have that turned off because I prefer the privacy of looking at a profile because as soon as you do, it's sometimes confused with interest. "
I didn’t know about that, that makes a lot of sense. |
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By *ucyfur77Woman
over a year ago
Pleasuretown |
"As said above.
The only thing that consufuses me, are those that read messages and don’t even look at profiles. Assuming I match with what they say they’re looking for ie age, gender etc etc
Why not read the profile to see if there’s interest?
I never write big wordy messages, just a few lines, hopefully commenting on something that have said on the profile.
Bearing in mind, the approach I take works very well elsewhere, so what’s different here?
I have that turned off because I prefer the privacy of looking at a profile because as soon as you do, it's sometimes confused with interest. "
I get that too. Makes you want to have stealth mode on tbh  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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no Reply means there not interested or possibly they might reply later.
Don’t take It as an offence. also lot of women get flooded with messages on here so it’s not possible for them to answer everyone.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thanks everyone for your thoughts. As it's been said couples & especially women get lots of messages from men,just seems odd that if they're not interested why haven't they deleted once read. Ever the optomist I'm living in the vain hope that someone might just reply,but thats fab for you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks everyone for your thoughts. As it's been said couples & especially women get lots of messages from men,just seems odd that if they're not interested why haven't they deleted once read. Ever the optomist I'm living in the vain hope that someone might just reply,but thats fab for you."
Expect nothing, that way you won't be disappointed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As said above.
The only thing that consufuses me, are those that read messages and don’t even look at profiles. Assuming I match with what they say they’re looking for ie age, gender etc etc
Why not read the profile to see if there’s interest?
I never write big wordy messages, just a few lines, hopefully commenting on something that have said on the profile.
Bearing in mind, the approach I take works very well elsewhere, so what’s different here?"
A lot of people hide from "looked at me" list. I've just read your profile. Can you see us on your list? 
Mrs |
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I have so often replied " not for me enjoy fab" and i recieve " ur a whore!!! And many other vile replies! So now i read and chat if im interested and if not i block! Not every man will respond with abuse but its what i do now x |
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By * and BCouple
over a year ago
Durham |
"Thanks everyone for your thoughts. As it's been said couples & especially women get lots of messages from men,just seems odd that if they're not interested why haven't they deleted once read. Ever the optomist I'm living in the vain hope that someone might just reply,but thats fab for you."
We don't delete any messages normally. We have several times on our profile we don't meet single guys so if we get a message from any we cant be bothered to reiterate something they haven't read or took no notice of. People deal with mail in completely different ways so just because you might delete read or unread messages doesn't mean every one have to act in the same way. If things aren't working, step back take a look at what maybe not working and change approach. Easy for a couple to say I hear you say OP, to be honest we get very little mail and lots of deleted mail. Doesn't worry us as we changed our approach a long time ago and get to meet a lot of wonderful people due to this |
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"Just delete all your sent messages then you won't know. Simple. "
Really good idea! Would save a lot of people a fair amount of frustration.
It is frustrating at times, but voicing that automatically brings people to immediately think a single guy is "entitled" (sometimes clearly true), or a "negative whinger". Even if neither is correct the majority who aren't in the same boat - couples and single females - will look on you as such, so better to just move forward and remain positive. Having a positive mental attitude and a bright disposition will stand you in good stead when someone does respond to you, so keep your head up and try not to get sucked into the negativity. You only hurt yourself at the end of the day. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As said above.
The only thing that consufuses me, are those that read messages and don’t even look at profiles. Assuming I match with what they say they’re looking for ie age, gender etc etc
Why not read the profile to see if there’s interest?
I never write big wordy messages, just a few lines, hopefully commenting on something that have said on the profile.
Bearing in mind, the approach I take works very well elsewhere, so what’s different here?
I don’t need to look at a profile to know I’m not interested.
A message alone can tell me all I need to know and any pictures they send, or zooming into their profile pic is enough.
Matching with their preferences such as age & gender doesn’t automatically mean you’re what they’re after.
"
Exactly, or the profile picture is a put off, or the message is bad or shows character traits we didn't like, or we might view in stealth mode.
Why are people so obsessed about this? |
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Quite common from my experience.
Just leave a note that they didn't reply/read your message and move on. At least that way, you know not to repeat the same mistake months later.
It could also be they bulk delete their messaged as some women/couples cab receive a lot in a day and don't have the time to go through all of them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have so often replied " not for me enjoy fab" and i recieve " ur a whore!!! And many other vile replies! So now i read and chat if im interested and if not i block! Not every man will respond with abuse but its what i do now x"
Yep me too! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just me or does this happen to others?
Iike every other solo man I've sent loads of message,the odd one or two get replied to,a lot get deleted with no reply,the rest have been read,but neither replied to or deleted,some have been sat there for several months,most odd."
What's odd? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Is it just me or does this happen to others?
Iike every other solo man I've sent loads of message,the odd one or two get replied to,a lot get deleted with no reply,the rest have been read,but neither replied to or deleted,some have been sat there for several months,most odd.
What's odd?"
The fact that people leave read messages un deleted. |
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By * and BCouple
over a year ago
Durham |
"Is it just me or does this happen to others?
Iike every other solo man I've sent loads of message,the odd one or two get replied to,a lot get deleted with no reply,the rest have been read,but neither replied to or deleted,some have been sat there for several months,most odd.
What's odd? The fact that people leave read messages un deleted."
We are odd...... Yipee |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If someone is not interested in someone who has sent them a message (a polite and meaningful message) it does not harm to just send a polite 'no thank you' message back. "
Love how it’s all the men saying this who probably don’t get 250 messages a day! 200 of which are bloody vile! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just me or does this happen to others?
Iike every other solo man I've sent loads of message,the odd one or two get replied to,a lot get deleted with no reply,the rest have been read,but neither replied to or deleted,some have been sat there for several months,most odd."
you've just got to get used to it, keep sending polite well thought out messages based on the target profile and eventually you will achieve success  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If someone is not interested in someone who has sent them a message (a polite and meaningful message) it does not harm to just send a polite 'no thank you' message back. "
Tales from Fabswingers FAQ
“There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!
It's not rude not to reply.
Some ladies and couples get hundreds of messages a day so it simply isn't possible for them to reply to everyone. If you don't get a response, you should assume they aren't interested. If you're getting a lot of "no-replies" then you should consider your profile and the messages you send. Are they giving the right message? Are you standing out from the thousands of other guys on here?”
You wouldn’t send a “No Thank You” letter/email/text to the junk mail you receive everyday. Does that make you rude too?
If you don’t like the fact women don’t reply to your “polite and meaningful” messages, maybe it’s best you don’t send women messages and make them come to you. Problem solved. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If someone is not interested in someone who has sent them a message (a polite and meaningful message) it does not harm to just send a polite 'no thank you' message back.
Love how it’s all the men saying this who probably don’t get 250 messages a day! 200 of which are bloody vile!"
It always is.
If they sat with a woman on here for 24 hours to see the kind of messages she gets, they may just understand. Then again, they probably won’t.
What’s funny though is a lot have no issue with women not replying to the “fancy a shag” messages, but they have an issue with women not replying to their so called polite message that they “took time to write” as has been said dozens of times, it is entitlement, so it’s not that they have an issue with women not replying to men. They just have an issue with women nit replying to THEM.
Nobody is obliged to reply to anyone no matter what. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If someone is not interested in someone who has sent them a message (a polite and meaningful message) it does not harm to just send a polite 'no thank you' message back.
Tales from Fabswingers FAQ
“There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!
It's not rude not to reply.
Some ladies and couples get hundreds of messages a day so it simply isn't possible for them to reply to everyone. If you don't get a response, you should assume they aren't interested. If you're getting a lot of "no-replies" then you should consider your profile and the messages you send. Are they giving the right message? Are you standing out from the thousands of other guys on here?”
You wouldn’t send a “No Thank You” letter/email/text to the junk mail you receive everyday. Does that make you rude too?
If you don’t like the fact women don’t reply to your “polite and meaningful” messages, maybe it’s best you don’t send women messages and make them come to you. Problem solved. "
Tbh... Sherlock Holmes isn’t needed to decipher why no reply lol
Had it many times. Each to their own and don’t take offence.
If I was inundated (more chance of winning lotto) I’d be exactly the same myself. |
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"If someone is not interested in someone who has sent them a message (a polite and meaningful message) it does not harm to just send a polite 'no thank you' message back.
Love how it’s all the men saying this who probably don’t get 250 messages a day! 200 of which are bloody vile!
It always is.
If they sat with a woman on here for 24 hours to see the kind of messages she gets, they may just understand. Then again, they probably won’t.
What’s funny though is a lot have no issue with women not replying to the “fancy a shag” messages, but they have an issue with women not replying to their so called polite message that they “took time to write” as has been said dozens of times, it is entitlement, so it’s not that they have an issue with women not replying to men. They just have an issue with women nit replying to THEM.
Nobody is obliged to reply to anyone no matter what. "
100% spot on! Second time in a week or so you've put it so well! x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If someone is not interested in someone who has sent them a message (a polite and meaningful message) it does not harm to just send a polite 'no thank you' message back.
Love how it’s all the men saying this who probably don’t get 250 messages a day! 200 of which are bloody vile!
It always is.
If they sat with a woman on here for 24 hours to see the kind of messages she gets, they may just understand. Then again, they probably won’t.
What’s funny though is a lot have no issue with women not replying to the “fancy a shag” messages, but they have an issue with women not replying to their so called polite message that they “took time to write” as has been said dozens of times, it is entitlement, so it’s not that they have an issue with women not replying to men. They just have an issue with women nit replying to THEM.
Nobody is obliged to reply to anyone no matter what.
100% spot on! Second time in a week or so you've put it so well! x"
Ha thank you! x |
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I hang onto the ones I've sent for a week or two in the hope that they get round to messaging, assuming they haven't deleted my message, but think it's only ever happened once. May just be me, but think that may be about par for the course - which confirms the suggestion of deleting those you've sent once read to be a good idea. Too many guys take it personally - and it rarely is. The women I know get between fifty and a hundred messages a day. Not manageable for anyone! Take it on the chin and move on fellas. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I always reply, I'm not rude "
So those of us who don't are rude in your opinion, despite the site faqs? Maybe you just aren't very popular, if we got 3-4 polite messages a day we would also reply to them all. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As said above.
The only thing that consufuses me, are those that read messages and don’t even look at profiles. Assuming I match with what they say they’re looking for ie age, gender etc etc
Why not read the profile to see if there’s interest?
I never write big wordy messages, just a few lines, hopefully commenting on something that have said on the profile.
Bearing in mind, the approach I take works very well elsewhere, so what’s different here?"
You dont always see if someome has looked at you, as it depends on their settings. |
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