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Fucking machine
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We bought one aptly named "the woodpecker". It cost a small fortune, sounds like a locomotive, and gives about the same pleasure as walking barefoot down a jagged Rocky path. It's stored in the same place our nearly impossible to assemble sex swing is. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Has anyone ever used or seen one being used that isn’t in a porno if so would love to hear more about it"
Got the plans for and built a 'monkey rocker' my ex girlfriend (and one of her friends) loved it. In fact she loved it so much she's never given it back! |
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By *G LanaTV/TS
over a year ago
Gosport |
I got into these to simulate being pegged which I love but clearly wasn't going to happen on a hurry when I seperated from my Ex. I then sort of by accident ended up with 4.
I started out with a Monkey Rocker which is excellent but limited to being used in a seated position and has a bit of an issue with causing numb legs on sessions over an hour. This is a none motorised machine driven by the riders legs and sort of works like a perverted rocking stool.
I then purchased a Blue Balls XL which is a rotary motor type and I didn't get on with it. I found it too hard to position for solo use and too easy to stall if uses on slower settings.
I then ordered a Hugher/Fucktech Tango. Unfortunately what I got sent was a Willy Wanka Pro which the supplier said I could keep but has remained in the box unused.
Finally the Tango arrived and this is wonderful. It is still a bit challenging for solo use but the drive is much better at handling slow speeds. What really separates this machine from the others though is the fact that the thrust patterns can be much more complex and interesting and altered on the fly (or on fact mid fuck) with easy control just using the machines remote.
At some point I need to sort out disposal of the Blue Balls and Willy Wanka as I can't see me ever using them again. |
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By *ransGuyTV/TS
over a year ago
Cardiff |
"Has anyone ever used or seen one being used that isn’t in a porno if so would love to hear more about it
Got the plans for and built a 'monkey rocker' my ex girlfriend (and one of her friends) loved it. In fact she loved it so much she's never given it back!"
I really fancy making one of these. If you don't mind me asking, was it particularly difficult to do? Could you get the parts needed easily? Any tips? Thank you  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We had a fucking machine but sold it. It doesn't feel good like the real thing, literally too mechanical.
Sybian would be nice if they didn't cost £800-900!! I bet the material cost is less than £200 |
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I have a trio; a limited edition Sybian (63 of 100), a Black Magic with additional extension arm and a Fucksall which has been fitted to a carefully modified cordless professional reciprocating saw 'Wickes. It's got our name on it.'
doctor Delerium |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I really fancy making one of these. If you don't mind me asking, was it particularly difficult to do? Could you get the parts needed easily? Any tips? Thank you"
"Monkey rocker looks very interesting, must find plans for self build I'm sure the good lady would enjoy"
Here's the link
http://www.funkyrocker.com/Buy-Plans.html |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I got into these to simulate being pegged which I love but clearly wasn't going to happen on a hurry when I seperated from my Ex. I then sort of by accident ended up with 4.
I started out with a Monkey Rocker which is excellent but limited to being used in a seated position and has a bit of an issue with causing numb legs on sessions over an hour. This is a none motorised machine driven by the riders legs and sort of works like a perverted rocking stool.
I then purchased a Blue Balls XL which is a rotary motor type and I didn't get on with it. I found it too hard to position for solo use and too easy to stall if uses on slower settings.
I then ordered a Hugher/Fucktech Tango. Unfortunately what I got sent was a Willy Wanka Pro which the supplier said I could keep but has remained in the box unused.
Finally the Tango arrived and this is wonderful. It is still a bit challenging for solo use but the drive is much better at handling slow speeds. What really separates this machine from the others though is the fact that the thrust patterns can be much more complex and interesting and altered on the fly (or on fact mid fuck) with easy control just using the machines remote.
At some point I need to sort out disposal of the Blue Balls and Willy Wanka as I can't see me ever using them again."
10/10 for effort and perseverance.
They sometimes have a fucking machine and sybian out at The Attic and will let people have a go if they wish... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We bought one aptly named "the woodpecker". It cost a small fortune, sounds like a locomotive, and gives about the same pleasure as walking barefoot down a jagged Rocky path. It's stored in the same place our nearly impossible to assemble sex swing is."
Exactly the same here (not the same model).
Was a pain to set up, the thrill of it soon dies off, it is in the spare room gathering dust as it is pretty useless. Noisy and difficult to control the speed settings (too sensitive) so pleasure was limited to almost none! 
Also have a swing... couldn’t attach anywhere but the door frame (we bought a frame clamp thingy) and it wouldn’t hold properly, I know you can buy those tubular steel frames... but too expensive and nowhere to store it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We bought one aptly named "the woodpecker". It cost a small fortune, sounds like a locomotive, and gives about the same pleasure as walking barefoot down a jagged Rocky path. It's stored in the same place our nearly impossible to assemble sex swing is.
Exactly the same here (not the same model).
Was a pain to set up, the thrill of it soon dies off, it is in the spare room gathering dust as it is pretty useless. Noisy and difficult to control the speed settings (too sensitive) so pleasure was limited to almost none!
Also have a swing... couldn’t attach anywhere but the door frame (we bought a frame clamp thingy) and it wouldn’t hold properly, I know you can buy those tubular steel frames... but too expensive and nowhere to store it "
Have you thought of putting heavy duty eyehooks in overhead joists?
It's easy to do and strong enough to take swing and occupant(speaking from experience) and if you want to disguise reason you can buy one if those hanging chairs and simply swap out when you want to use swing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Have you thought of putting heavy duty eyehooks in overhead joists?
It's easy to do and strong enough to take swing and occupant(speaking from experience) and if you want to disguise reason you can buy one if those hanging chairs and simply swap out when you want to use swing"
not sure it would quite support me |
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I have access to one which is variable pitch on the fly
and I used to make a range of machines both portable and loor
Was thinking about building a monkey rocker if any one wants to share ideas plans etc there are a couple of different types |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Also have a swing... couldn’t attach anywhere but the door frame (we bought a frame clamp thingy) and it wouldn’t hold properly"
Thick M10 bolt up through ceiling into and through the joist. Can be disguised by placing a hollowed out smoke alarm over the top |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We bought one aptly named "the woodpecker". It cost a small fortune, sounds like a locomotive, and gives about the same pleasure as walking barefoot down a jagged Rocky path. It's stored in the same place our nearly impossible to assemble sex swing is."
lol shame it cost so much - but that's funny |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I once used a fucksaw on a friend, she drenched just about everything in the process and collapsed when released from the pillory bench.
She was shaking for ages |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Also have a swing... couldn’t attach anywhere but the door frame (we bought a frame clamp thingy) and it wouldn’t hold properly
Thick M10 bolt up through ceiling into and through the joist. Can be disguised by placing a hollowed out smoke alarm over the top"
How ingenious and devious!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We bought one aptly named "the woodpecker". It cost a small fortune, sounds like a locomotive, and gives about the same pleasure as walking barefoot down a jagged Rocky path. It's stored in the same place our nearly impossible to assemble sex swing is."
 |
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At a club / venue, met
- a reciprocating "fucking machine" with a crank which went round-and-round - adjustable stroke and speed
- a "Fuckzall" (Sawzall power saw with blade replaced by a dildo)
Both fantastic fun. Used both at the same time on female _abcouple11
Never tried a sybian... |
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"
Was a pain to set up, the thrill of it soon dies off, it is in the spare room gathering dust as it is pretty useless. Noisy and difficult to control the speed settings (too sensitive) so pleasure was limited to almost none! "
I had a partner like that once. |
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not too noisy and very powerful 
