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Swinging Evil
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I wonder if there are some who swing out of lust but actually believe deep down that swinging is evil and soul destroying? Is everyone here being true to their hearts? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I only believe that it becomes soul destroying when you do what is against your own personal boundaries. If you allow yourself to get too involved and lose your core self. As long as you stay true to your likes and don't allow yourself to be coerced into doing what you don't really want to do, it should just be an (mostly) enjoyable experience. |
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I think some people who swing are deeply conflicted about it and/or feel guilty. Which is not surprising given that falling in monogamous love is the societal convention we are all brought up with.
You see that conflict in many people's need to define themselves as being unlike other swingers - they feel the social aspect is more important, are not looking to shag the whole site etc etc |
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"I think some people who swing are deeply conflicted about it and/or feel guilty. Which is not surprising given that falling in monogamous love is the societal convention we are all brought up with.
You see that conflict in many people's need to define themselves as being unlike other swingers - they feel the social aspect is more important, are not looking to shag the whole site etc etc "
I feel guilty when i drink pepsi max because i have shares in coca cola. I'm conflicted about it because pepsi max is just the bit sweeter but i know i should follow peter lynch's advice.
Swinging is really not a difficult choice but then I'm a highly disagreeable person with low neroticism; if the reverse were true then i probably would feel guilty. But it isn't and so i don't. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't swing, I care not what people say but this site is also modern way for single people to meet like-minded single people and have fantastic sexual adventures...
Hypocritical or not I wouldn't dream of 'sharing' someone i was in a relationship with, I don't meet couples as it's not my thing. But I'm very committed and old fashioned in a relationship,seeing someone fuck my partner is not what I would define as love...but many couple see it as love and at the end of the day, who can define it??? |
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"I don't swing, I care not what people say but this site is also modern way for single people to meet like-minded single people and have fantastic sexual adventures...
Hypocritical or not I wouldn't dream of 'sharing' someone i was in a relationship with, I don't meet couples as it's not my thing. But I'm very committed and old fashioned in a relationship,seeing someone fuck my partner is not what I would define as love...but many couple see it as love and at the end of the day, who can define it???"
But they way you define it, you think swinging couples don't love each other. Wow.  |
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"I don't swing, I care not what people say but this site is also modern way for single people to meet like-minded single people and have fantastic sexual adventures...
Hypocritical or not I wouldn't dream of 'sharing' someone i was in a relationship with, I don't meet couples as it's not my thing. But I'm very committed and old fashioned in a relationship,seeing someone fuck my partner is not what I would define as love...but many couple see it as love and at the end of the day, who can define it???"
There's a great deal more to love than that but you aren't alone in your opinion.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't swing, I care not what people say but this site is also modern way for single people to meet like-minded single people and have fantastic sexual adventures...
Hypocritical or not I wouldn't dream of 'sharing' someone i was in a relationship with, I don't meet couples as it's not my thing. But I'm very committed and old fashioned in a relationship,seeing someone fuck my partner is not what I would define as love...but many couple see it as love and at the end of the day, who can define it???
But they way you define it, you think swinging couples don't love each other. Wow. "
But surely people only swing when their relationship is pretty much over. All dull and boring and sexless?  |
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"I don't swing, I care not what people say but this site is also modern way for single people to meet like-minded single people and have fantastic sexual adventures...
Hypocritical or not I wouldn't dream of 'sharing' someone i was in a relationship with, I don't meet couples as it's not my thing. But I'm very committed and old fashioned in a relationship,seeing someone fuck my partner is not what I would define as love...but many couple see it as love and at the end of the day, who can define it???
But they way you define it, you think swinging couples don't love each other. Wow.
But surely people only swing when their relationship is pretty much over. All dull and boring and sexless? "
Well we discussed swinging before we even started dating because I'm not interested in monogamous relationships. But i could also be absolutely terrible in bed and hence the theory holds that by day 3 the sex was so bad, she was deseperate for better quality dick elsewhere... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't swing, I care not what people say but this site is also modern way for single people to meet like-minded single people and have fantastic sexual adventures...
Hypocritical or not I wouldn't dream of 'sharing' someone i was in a relationship with, I don't meet couples as it's not my thing. But I'm very committed and old fashioned in a relationship,seeing someone fuck my partner is not what I would define as love...but many couple see it as love and at the end of the day, who can define it???
But they way you define it, you think swinging couples don't love each other. Wow.
But surely people only swing when their relationship is pretty much over. All dull and boring and sexless?
Well we discussed swinging before we even started dating because I'm not interested in monogamous relationships. But i could also be absolutely terrible in bed and hence the theory holds that by day 3 the sex was so bad, she was deseperate for better quality dick elsewhere..."
 ouch.
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It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
"
Exactly  |
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
"
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
"
While I'm inclined to agree that the general population agrees with him. Why come on a website that says the word swinger. We all know what that means surely? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
"
They probably would claim to. It’s interesting when you get chatting with people when they’ve had a few drinks and the inhibitions are lowered, how they then react when they know my wife and I swing. I’ve had both halves of couples admit they’d love to but think the other half wouldn’t.
I’ve also heard them say they’d love to but they couldn’t bear to see their other half play.
Swinging couples have something very special. |
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
They probably would claim to. It’s interesting when you get chatting with people when they’ve had a few drinks and the inhibitions are lowered, how they then react when they know my wife and I swing. I’ve had both halves of couples admit they’d love to but think the other half wouldn’t.
I’ve also heard them say they’d love to but they couldn’t bear to see their other half play.
Swinging couples have something very special. "
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
While I'm inclined to agree that the general population agrees with him. Why come on a website that says the word swinger. We all know what that means surely? "
We know what it means to us. There are hundreds of single people on here who wouldn't dream of swinging with a partner. |
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
They probably would claim to. It’s interesting when you get chatting with people when they’ve had a few drinks and the inhibitions are lowered, how they then react when they know my wife and I swing. I’ve had both halves of couples admit they’d love to but think the other half wouldn’t.
I’ve also heard them say they’d love to but they couldn’t bear to see their other half play.
Swinging couples have something very special. "
I agree that successful swinging couples have something very special. It's possible to have something special if you don't swing too.
I don't think anybody's better in any way if they swing or if they don't. I do think that very many people really don't understand that neither a sense of ownership of another persons expression of sexuality nor sex itself equal love.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
While I'm inclined to agree that the general population agrees with him. Why come on a website that says the word swinger. We all know what that means surely?
We know what it means to us. There are hundreds of single people on here who wouldn't dream of swinging with a partner."
We walked away from so many guys who clearly didn’t understand what we were doing. Some even thought we needed them because of some inadequacy.  |
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
While I'm inclined to agree that the general population agrees with him. Why come on a website that says the word swinger. We all know what that means surely?
We know what it means to us. There are hundreds of single people on here who wouldn't dream of swinging with a partner.
We walked away from so many guys who clearly didn’t understand what we were doing. Some even thought we needed them because of some inadequacy. "
Yep!
We make a point of never explaining why we swing. You either get it or you don't. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't swing, I care not what people say but this site is also modern way for single people to meet like-minded single people and have fantastic sexual adventures...
Hypocritical or not I wouldn't dream of 'sharing' someone i was in a relationship with, I don't meet couples as it's not my thing. But I'm very committed and old fashioned in a relationship,seeing someone fuck my partner is not what I would define as love...but many couple see it as love and at the end of the day, who can define it???"
I agree with 100% of that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There's no way the couple's do it without loving eachother it is not my definition but they Obviously believe and share a felling I don't and which is out of my grasp currently I'm not so naive to believe my way is right and theirs is wrong it's just different. Maybe I'm not emotionally evolved enough yet to fully appreciate that dynamic, what I will say though some of the couple's relationships are probably dead in the bedroom because they definitely not evolved judging my some of their replies to me and someone emotionally evolved doesn't bite on every comment. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
They probably would claim to. It’s interesting when you get chatting with people when they’ve had a few drinks and the inhibitions are lowered, how they then react when they know my wife and I swing. I’ve had both halves of couples admit they’d love to but think the other half wouldn’t.
I’ve also heard them say they’d love to but they couldn’t bear to see their other half play.
Swinging couples have something very special.
I agree that successful swinging couples have something very special. It's possible to have something special if you don't swing too.
I don't think anybody's better in any way if they swing or if they don't. I do think that very many people really don't understand that neither a sense of ownership of another persons expression of sexuality nor sex itself equal love. "
People can be close in many ways and I get to spend a week with a different couple evey week in my job. I often get to know their innermost secrets, I’m not sure why people open up so swiftly. Could be because I’m working on such a personal part of their home or because I’m so open about who I am.
Anyway, people tell me all sorts. I still maintain the closest and most loving relationships I’ve encountered have been swinging couples. |
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
They probably would claim to. It’s interesting when you get chatting with people when they’ve had a few drinks and the inhibitions are lowered, how they then react when they know my wife and I swing. I’ve had both halves of couples admit they’d love to but think the other half wouldn’t.
I’ve also heard them say they’d love to but they couldn’t bear to see their other half play.
Swinging couples have something very special.
I agree that successful swinging couples have something very special. It's possible to have something special if you don't swing too.
I don't think anybody's better in any way if they swing or if they don't. I do think that very many people really don't understand that neither a sense of ownership of another persons expression of sexuality nor sex itself equal love. "
This is true, but the majority of people don't have something special. In fact, 43% end up divorced and then there are the 'stay together for the kids' crew. I'd be far more convinced by the arguements against swinging if the median was that most mongamous people, got married, stayed married and lived happily ever after. |
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
They probably would claim to. It’s interesting when you get chatting with people when they’ve had a few drinks and the inhibitions are lowered, how they then react when they know my wife and I swing. I’ve had both halves of couples admit they’d love to but think the other half wouldn’t.
I’ve also heard them say they’d love to but they couldn’t bear to see their other half play.
Swinging couples have something very special.
I agree that successful swinging couples have something very special. It's possible to have something special if you don't swing too.
I don't think anybody's better in any way if they swing or if they don't. I do think that very many people really don't understand that neither a sense of ownership of another persons expression of sexuality nor sex itself equal love.
This is true, but the majority of people don't have something special. In fact, 43% end up divorced and then there are the 'stay together for the kids' crew. I'd be far more convinced by the arguements against swinging if the median was that most mongamous people, got married, stayed married and lived happily ever after. "
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
They probably would claim to. It’s interesting when you get chatting with people when they’ve had a few drinks and the inhibitions are lowered, how they then react when they know my wife and I swing. I’ve had both halves of couples admit they’d love to but think the other half wouldn’t.
I’ve also heard them say they’d love to but they couldn’t bear to see their other half play.
Swinging couples have something very special.
I agree that successful swinging couples have something very special. It's possible to have something special if you don't swing too.
I don't think anybody's better in any way if they swing or if they don't. I do think that very many people really don't understand that neither a sense of ownership of another persons expression of sexuality nor sex itself equal love.
This is true, but the majority of people don't have something special. In fact, 43% end up divorced and then there are the 'stay together for the kids' crew. I'd be far more convinced by the arguements against swinging if the median was that most mongamous people, got married, stayed married and lived happily ever after. "
I'm not sure how many swingers stay married for life.
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We come into the category of being lucky to have such a special marriage where we can do as we please , with who we please . Why are we lucky though ? Well it’s simple really , life itself is full of things you can’t do . Our marriage , which is based on the true love we share together by the way , is the one thing which allows us to do what society deems as things we shouldn’t do .
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can honestly say we have an amazing sex life but use swinging as an add on, it certainly doesn’t define us, we are truly madly deeply in love but understand that we enjoy sex with others that we trust, this heightens our sex life in a way only couples who swing can understand. Opening up and being honest with each other about wants and desires is a beautiful thing, I definitely wouldn’t discribe our marriage as dull, dead or unfulfilled.  |
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
They probably would claim to. It’s interesting when you get chatting with people when they’ve had a few drinks and the inhibitions are lowered, how they then react when they know my wife and I swing. I’ve had both halves of couples admit they’d love to but think the other half wouldn’t.
I’ve also heard them say they’d love to but they couldn’t bear to see their other half play.
Swinging couples have something very special.
I agree that successful swinging couples have something very special. It's possible to have something special if you don't swing too.
I don't think anybody's better in any way if they swing or if they don't. I do think that very many people really don't understand that neither a sense of ownership of another persons expression of sexuality nor sex itself equal love.
This is true, but the majority of people don't have something special. In fact, 43% end up divorced and then there are the 'stay together for the kids' crew. I'd be far more convinced by the arguements against swinging if the median was that most mongamous people, got married, stayed married and lived happily ever after.
I'm not sure how many swingers stay married for life.
"
Nor am I , but I wouldn’t mind betting they have more happy sexual memories when they split up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can honestly say we have an amazing sex life but use swinging as an add on, it certainly doesn’t define us, we are truly madly deeply in love but understand that we enjoy sex with others that we trust, this heightens our sex life in a way only couples who swing can understand. Opening up and being honest with each other about wants and desires is a beautiful thing, I definitely wouldn’t discribe our marriage as dull, dead or unfulfilled. "
It's definitely not a society norm and how boring would it be if we were all the same people |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
They probably would claim to. It’s interesting when you get chatting with people when they’ve had a few drinks and the inhibitions are lowered, how they then react when they know my wife and I swing. I’ve had both halves of couples admit they’d love to but think the other half wouldn’t.
I’ve also heard them say they’d love to but they couldn’t bear to see their other half play.
Swinging couples have something very special.
I agree that successful swinging couples have something very special. It's possible to have something special if you don't swing too.
I don't think anybody's better in any way if they swing or if they don't. I do think that very many people really don't understand that neither a sense of ownership of another persons expression of sexuality nor sex itself equal love.
This is true, but the majority of people don't have something special. In fact, 43% end up divorced and then there are the 'stay together for the kids' crew. I'd be far more convinced by the arguements against swinging if the median was that most mongamous people, got married, stayed married and lived happily ever after. "
Alas the special relationship couples, unfortunately, are not in the majority when it comes to swinging couples.
I’m sure those of us who have gone to clubs regularly can spot the couples who really are making a massive mistake by being there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Swinging couples have something very special.
Couldn't agree more, and those that don't aren't swingers for long, we've seen many come and go. X"
Indeed |
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
I don't think he's belittling us or judging. He's expressed his understanding of love and relationships, it isn't ours but it doesn't make it wrong. The majority of the population would agree with him.
They probably would claim to. It’s interesting when you get chatting with people when they’ve had a few drinks and the inhibitions are lowered, how they then react when they know my wife and I swing. I’ve had both halves of couples admit they’d love to but think the other half wouldn’t.
I’ve also heard them say they’d love to but they couldn’t bear to see their other half play.
Swinging couples have something very special.
I agree that successful swinging couples have something very special. It's possible to have something special if you don't swing too.
I don't think anybody's better in any way if they swing or if they don't. I do think that very many people really don't understand that neither a sense of ownership of another persons expression of sexuality nor sex itself equal love.
This is true, but the majority of people don't have something special. In fact, 43% end up divorced and then there are the 'stay together for the kids' crew. I'd be far more convinced by the arguements against swinging if the median was that most mongamous people, got married, stayed married and lived happily ever after.
I'm not sure how many swingers stay married for life.
"
Slightly above average from a non-peer reviewed study, but that's not the point. I don't see that non-monogamous people look down on monogamy out of principle. My life would be considerably easier if i could be monogamous and happy. However, most monogamous people do look down on non-monogamous couples and they really don't have a track record that justifies it. |
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"
I'm not sure how many swingers stay married for life.
Slightly above average from a non-peer reviewed study, but that's not the point. I don't see that non-monogamous people look down on monogamy out of principle. My life would be considerably easier if i could be monogamous and happy. However, most monogamous people do look down on non-monogamous couples and they really don't have a track record that justifies it. "
Ah I understand your point now.
I do detect a distinct whiff of superiority from some swinging couples towards monogamous couples but you're right not as many as the other way round. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal????? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal?????"
Sex with multiple partners isn’t illegal.
Marrying multiple people without divorcing, is.
Quite simple really. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal?????
Sex with multiple partners isn’t illegal.
Marrying multiple people without divorcing, is.
Quite simple really. "
Thanks for pointing out the law on that.? |
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"Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal?????
Sex with multiple partners isn’t illegal.
Marrying multiple people without divorcing, is.
Quite simple really. "
Exactly !! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal?????
Sex with multiple partners isn’t illegal.
Marrying multiple people without divorcing, is.
Quite simple really.
Exactly !! "
So you're telling me it's only different by law? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal?????
Sex with multiple partners isn’t illegal.
Marrying multiple people without divorcing, is.
Quite simple really.
Exactly !!
So you're telling me it's only different by law?"
Lol. If you don’t understand swinging you really are on the wrong site. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Marrying someone is quite different to having casual sex...."
That's what I find slightly concerning having "casual" sex with people whilst in a relationship.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal?????
Sex with multiple partners isn’t illegal.
Marrying multiple people without divorcing, is.
Quite simple really.
Exactly !!
So you're telling me it's only different by law?
Lol. If you don’t understand swinging you really are on the wrong site. "
I don't need to understand swinging as I said earlier, I'm not here to swing. As aren't about 80% of the site I'm guessing. |
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"Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal?????
Sex with multiple partners isn’t illegal.
Marrying multiple people without divorcing, is.
Quite simple really.
Exactly !!
So you're telling me it's only different by law?
Lol. If you don’t understand swinging you really are on the wrong site.
I don't need to understand swinging as I said earlier, I'm not here to swing. As aren't about 80% of the site I'm guessing."
You know it's called fab SWINGERS right? Happy doing whatever it is your doing! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal?????
Sex with multiple partners isn’t illegal.
Marrying multiple people without divorcing, is.
Quite simple really.
Exactly !!
So you're telling me it's only different by law?
Lol. If you don’t understand swinging you really are on the wrong site.
I don't need to understand swinging as I said earlier, I'm not here to swing. As aren't about 80% of the site I'm guessing.
You know it's called fab SWINGERS right? Happy doing whatever it is your doing! "
Amazon doesn't sell rivers... |
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"Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal?????
Sex with multiple partners isn’t illegal.
Marrying multiple people without divorcing, is.
Quite simple really.
Exactly !!
So you're telling me it's only different by law?
Lol. If you don’t understand swinging you really are on the wrong site.
I don't need to understand swinging as I said earlier, I'm not here to swing. As aren't about 80% of the site I'm guessing."
Why make sweeping statements about subjects you don't understand - Are you under the impression that single women find ignorance attractive? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal?????
Sex with multiple partners isn’t illegal.
Marrying multiple people without divorcing, is.
Quite simple really.
Exactly !!
So you're telling me it's only different by law?
Lol. If you don’t understand swinging you really are on the wrong site.
I don't need to understand swinging as I said earlier, I'm not here to swing. As aren't about 80% of the site I'm guessing.
Why make sweeping statements about subjects you don't understand - Are you under the impression that single women find ignorance attractive?"
I like how you slyly implied I was ignorant there. I find forum regulars like yourself the first to start spitting feathers when your values are questioned..the good old "do as we do" culture. |
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about. "
Wholeheartedly agree! Married, very much in love and we are swingers! |
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"I wonder if there are some who swing out of lust but actually believe deep down that swinging is evil and soul destroying? Is everyone here being true to their hearts? "
I just think swinging is fun. There's nothing wrong with having sex, we're not breaking any laws, there's no deceit or dishonesty... just sexy fun with willing friends or strangers.
Cal |
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"Marrying someone is quite different to having casual sex....
That's what I find slightly concerning having "casual" sex with people whilst in a relationship.."
Why do you find it concerning?
All are consenting adults.
We mostly swing with other couples. Sometimes more than one other couple.
In our experience these couples are in happy relationships. They simply want to add a little spice every so often.
If you fancy trying a 3some, 4some or more you need more than 2 people... I doesn't mean the couple is dysfunctional or that the sex between then is lacking.
Nita |
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"Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal?????
Sex with multiple partners isn’t illegal.
Marrying multiple people without divorcing, is.
Quite simple really.
Exactly !!
So you're telling me it's only different by law?
Lol. If you don’t understand swinging you really are on the wrong site.
I don't need to understand swinging as I said earlier, I'm not here to swing. As aren't about 80% of the site I'm guessing."
Hmmmm perhaps you should change your profile as it currently states you are here to meet couples as well as single ladies. Quite contradictory to what you are saying here don’t you think? |
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"Marrying someone is quite different to having casual sex....
That's what I find slightly concerning having "casual" sex with people whilst in a relationship..
Why do you find it concerning?
All are consenting adults.
We mostly swing with other couples. Sometimes more than one other couple.
In our experience these couples are in happy relationships. They simply want to add a little spice every so often.
If you fancy trying a 3some, 4some or more you need more than 2 people... I doesn't mean the couple is dysfunctional or that the sex between then is lacking.
Nita "
Very well articulated |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal?????
Sex with multiple partners isn’t illegal.
Marrying multiple people without divorcing, is.
Quite simple really.
Exactly !!
So you're telling me it's only different by law?
Lol. If you don’t understand swinging you really are on the wrong site.
I don't need to understand swinging as I said earlier, I'm not here to swing. As aren't about 80% of the site I'm guessing.
Hmmmm perhaps you should change your profile as it currently states you are here to meet couples as well as single ladies. Quite contradictory to what you are saying here don’t you think? "
I've met couples socially...I said I'm not into sex with couples...so..no I don't think...unless I'm using the filters wrong too?? |
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"Seems that when a single person mentions love and swinger couples, some couples get all defensive and hostile and act out like we are saying there is no love etc, just as you are allowed to define your relationship's as better than ever and totally free etc, I am equally entitled to define it wrong to 'me' as I said, we all define it differently. I just don't understand how swinging is seen so differently to polygamy...which is illegal?????
Sex with multiple partners isn’t illegal.
Marrying multiple people without divorcing, is.
Quite simple really.
Exactly !!
So you're telling me it's only different by law?
Lol. If you don’t understand swinging you really are on the wrong site.
I don't need to understand swinging as I said earlier, I'm not here to swing. As aren't about 80% of the site I'm guessing.
Hmmmm perhaps you should change your profile as it currently states you are here to meet couples as well as single ladies. Quite contradictory to what you are saying here don’t you think?
I've met couples socially...I said I'm not into sex with couples...so..no I don't think...unless I'm using the filters wrong too??"
Perhaps you are as for anyone visiting your profile they will see you are looking for MF Couples and women. You should also set your filters so that only the audience you are looking for can view your profile! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
See...I NEVER said couples that swing don't love each other, I said their definition of love was different to mine, i also implied no one has the right to ultimately define love...suddenly I'm being blasted for having an opinion people are getting insultive and couples seem compelled to state they are in love...????
Just crack on. |
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By *entenTeaCouple
over a year ago
Buckley North Wales |
Swinging is not evil nor is human sexuality. However it can be like any thing else be missused or become addictive to the point of negative personal affect.
As a couple we enjoy our sexuality, now we enjoy it with a wider pallette. With openess and free of jealousy. |
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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
I enjoy swinging as a singleton. I have some fab friends that I play with which means I don’t need to do the random meets.
Some friendships form in many different ways as does love. Don’t need to be in love to love someone dearly.
I also know some great couples who enjoy this lifestyle and it enhances their lives
|
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"...suddenly I'm being blasted for having an opinion people are getting insultive and couples seem compelled to state they are in love...????
Just crack on."
I've read back through the thread and with the exception of one or two, there have been no insults.
This is a discussion... People will have different opinions.
Nita |
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"I only believe that it becomes soul destroying when you do what is against your own personal boundaries. If you allow yourself to get too involved and lose your core self. As long as you stay true to your likes and don't allow yourself to be coerced into doing what you don't really want to do, it should just be an (mostly) enjoyable experience. "
well said |
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"See...I NEVER said couples that swing don't love each other, I said their definition of love was different to mine, i also implied no one has the right to ultimately define love...suddenly I'm being blasted for having an opinion people are getting insultive and couples seem compelled to state they are in love...????
Just crack on."
if you read back through the responses you will see this couple defended your right to your opinion. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"See...I NEVER said couples that swing don't love each other, I said their definition of love was different to mine, i also implied no one has the right to ultimately define love...suddenly I'm being blasted for having an opinion people are getting insultive and couples seem compelled to state they are in love...????
Just crack on."
People feel the need to defend their lifestyle, reaffirming their love for each other supports that when someone dares question their choices. |
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"See...I NEVER said couples that swing don't love each other, I said their definition of love was different to mine, i also implied no one has the right to ultimately define love...suddenly I'm being blasted for having an opinion people are getting insultive and couples seem compelled to state they are in love...????
Just crack on.
People feel the need to defend their lifestyle, reaffirming their love for each other supports that when someone dares question their choices."
We genuinely don't feel the need to defend what we do and never justify or explain. As I said earlier you either get it or you don't. If someone doesn't understand or feels differently about swinging than us so be it. We're happy with the choices we've made and the life we lead and that really is all that matters. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I don't swing, I care not what people say but this site is also modern way for single people to meet like-minded single people and have fantastic sexual adventures...
Hypocritical or not I wouldn't dream of 'sharing' someone i was in a relationship with, I don't meet couples as it's not my thing. But I'm very committed and old fashioned in a relationship,seeing someone fuck my partner is not what I would define as love...but many couple see it as love and at the end of the day, who can define it???"
Exactly |
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"See...I NEVER said couples that swing don't love each other, I said their definition of love was different to mine, i also implied no one has the right to ultimately define love...suddenly I'm being blasted for having an opinion people are getting insultive and couples seem compelled to state they are in love...????
Just crack on."
It's a bit pointless to have words without definitions but keep digging. You have the right to state your opinion and others have the right to scrutinise whether it is really based on any intelligent analysis. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I only believe that it becomes soul destroying when you do what is against your own personal boundaries. If you allow yourself to get too involved and lose your core self. As long as you stay true to your likes and don't allow yourself to be coerced into doing what you don't really want to do, it should just be an (mostly) enjoyable experience. "
This |
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"Personally, I believe swinging with a partner means that something is missing...my opinion!"
Lots of people think that. In some cases they're right.
I'm not asking this aggressively but what do you think is missing if couples swing? |
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"Personally, I believe swinging with a partner means that something is missing...my opinion!"
A lifestyle of non-monogany where sexual relations occur outside the established couple. Swingers tend to refrain from romantic attachments with their outside partners, thus differentiating themselves from PolyAmorists. There is some overlap between the two communities, though the closeness of the comparisons are generally not acknowledged.
Swingers often engage in the activity as a couple. "Swing Parties" are venues where the activity may occur.
That's the accepted definition of a swinger. Now I understand that singletons want to get in on the action and want threesomes or even just twosomes. Which I think is fantastic! Variety is the spice of life ! What I have a problem with is. People like yourself who make derogatory comments about couples on a SWINGING website. Your sweeping statement is at best ignorant and at worst offensive and maybe you should rethink your choice of platform for your opinion which of course you have a right too. But we also have a right to respond.
Just saying |
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"Personally, I believe swinging with a partner means that something is missing...my opinion!"
When I was 48 I split from my ex wife .
I went in traditional dating sites , never even considered a swinging site .
I realised I wanted something way more meaningful than casual flings , and started dating S which led to us establishing a solid relationship , and we both decided to start incorporating others in our sex life after a year together .
Another year later we got married , and now 5 and half years after getting married , we have a marriage which is certainly not missing anything at all !
And that’s not my opinion , it’s a fact .... just saying |
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"I wonder if there are some who swing out of lust but actually believe deep down that swinging is evil and soul destroying? Is everyone here being true to their hearts? "
Hmm, 'evil' is a religious concept, some of the best fun I've had with godly folk. Maybe it's the natural reaction to their piouty but believe me I've never quite been ragged like I have by women who've attended a Catholic boarding school   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Personally, I believe swinging with a partner means that something is missing...my opinion!
I think 48 year old singles have something missing... just my opinion "
Firstly
Apologies for my late reply, I've been spending my time with my feline mates!
I have no life,being 48 and on a sex site!
I can mentally justify,to myself,no one in here,I'm single,I want to have sex,you?
Is your partner coercing you?
Is your partner crap?
Are you a sex maniac?
Why do you want to see him/her with someone else? Please tell me, I'm truly interested!
|
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"Personally, I believe swinging with a partner means that something is missing...my opinion!
I think 48 year old singles have something missing... just my opinion
Firstly
Apologies for my late reply, I've been spending my time with my feline mates!
I have no life,being 48 and on a sex site!
I can mentally justify,to myself,no one in here,I'm single,I want to have sex,you?
Is your partner coercing you?
Is your partner crap?
Are you a sex maniac?
Why do you want to see him/her with someone else? Please tell me, I'm truly interested!
"
Human nature really. Very few people are truly happy being single, those that are usually just had relationships so bad that their expectations of life have been moved so low that eastenders, maltesers and a glass of wine now sounds like an enticing evening.
Most people are not monoganous by nature. Some are, but most aren't. Most people pretend to be happily sign up to monogamy but end up cheating and or divorced. Swinging is a nice third way option where you get all the excitement of exploring your sexuality without the loneliness of being single or without the hurt of an affair. |
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"I wonder if there are some who swing out of lust but actually believe deep down that swinging is evil and soul destroying? Is everyone here being true to their hearts? "
Maybe if they’re doing and saying things they don’t really like or believe in to please others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I don't swing, I care not what people say but this site is also modern way for single people to meet like-minded single people and have fantastic sexual adventures...
Hypocritical or not I wouldn't dream of 'sharing' someone i was in a relationship with, I don't meet couples as it's not my thing. But I'm very committed and old fashioned in a relationship,seeing someone fuck my partner is not what I would define as love...but many couple see it as love and at the end of the day, who can define it???"
|
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
"
|
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"It baffles me that people come on a website with swinger in the name and then attempt to belittle couples who are very much in love, not bored and definitely not over. Everyone is here for their own reasons why feel the need to belittle other people's decisions?
Don't judge if you have no idea what you are talking about.
"
|
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We can all have fantasies and build on them when on the Internet, but in real life away from all that to live that lifestyle in practice as a couple who love one another unless you both are geninuely wired the same mindset upstairs it would never work, I,m not really wired to it myself and I,m more vanilla acting but I enjoy the openness of people on here.. |
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