FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > Swinging and finding love...my dilema..

Swinging and finding love...my dilema..

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Im single and dont want to be

Ive met lots of men off regular dating sites but they are never on the same wavelengh sexually. So i joined a 'paying' swinging site and was honest about what i wanted, but i deleted myself after getting some really nasty comments such as '' you dont belong on here, its not for people like you''.

So far ive had no horrible mail on here but get loads of men mail me who say they want a longterm relationship but really they are wanting a fuck buddy.

Am i just being naive? I just figured if i wanted to meet a sky diver id join a parachuting club, so if i want to meet a guy who swings.....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Im single and dont want to be

So far ive had no horrible mail on here but get loads of men mail me who say they want a longterm relationship but really they are wanting a fuck buddy.

Am i just being naive? I just figured if i wanted to meet a sky diver id join a parachuting club, so if i want to meet a guy who swings..... "
I think you could be in the right place, or at least one of them! I know of a few single guys on here who would also like to have a relationship with a lady on the same wavelength as them

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i met my wife of this very same site so it does happen i went to hers for some fun then a year later were married

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By *leasureDomeMan over a year ago

all over the place

now thats a tough one...in theory i dont think you would have a prob ...as many have made the transition from swingers FBs to full on marrieds with kids and good on em ...no doubt you can meet someone ..but i suspect its rare ,,

hope you prove me wrong though

PD x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Gosh, I think it would be hard to find a partner. Guess the nature of the beast, many sexual partners for minimum effort.

I don't think this is the best place to find a partner, though some claim to have just that.

Guess you have tried the dating sites, and with a few clever questioning found out if they are that way inclined (to share you sexually with other).

But i hope you have fun finding one

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By *resh freddieMan over a year ago

Penistone

Well lets see how to answer that one.

Ok primarily most people here are NOT monogamous, but saying that there are single men on here who would like a long term relationship. But and there is a big BUT these guys will most likely be in the swinging scene and not really be looking to give it up. There is a thrill and excitement of meeting new people, and I have to admit to this my self where you have both a sexual relationship with newly met friends and you get on with them on a social level. You have to ask your self the following questions.

1/Do I want a partner who is not really monogamous.

2/Can I live with my partner having sex with other people.

3/Would I want to join in the activities

4/ Am I happy to trust a non monogamous man

Im not saying its inappropriate but as a bloke you do tend to shy away from commitment here. Not that your not into some level of commitment, but its like eating a bacon sandwich at a Jewish vegetarian meeting it just doesn’t feel appropriate.

What you will find is that some of the single people on here are on dating sites and social sights. If you can find these people on both you could contact them on a dating site knowing they swing as well. I have to say I appreciate your dilemma over this but I cant think of a perfect answer.

Look if you want to chat about what might be the right direction im happy to put across a blokes point of view and it may or may not help.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I know people who have meet there partners swinging and could not be more happy with life ... I am sure thay are out there its just finding the one you like.......... dont give up and let us know here when you find him.. Maybe go too clubs too get out and mix theres loads of swingers clubs and some nights mixed with single men..and good fun too xx jo

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By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Im single and dont want to be

So far ive had no horrible mail on here but get loads of men mail me who say they want a longterm relationship but really they are wanting a fuck buddy.

Am i just being naive? I just figured if i wanted to meet a sky diver id join a parachuting club, so if i want to meet a guy who swings..... "

its a good question....

The thing that I tend to see is that once people "couple up"... two things then to happen

1)the single guy is then only interested in seeing couples.. like you forget where you came from so to speak, and like it is there magical way in to another scene....

2) just want to shut it down altogether, it okay to play when we were single but not when you know have someone else to think about...

I have seen relationships work where two people have gotten together and worked, married, had kids ect..... but I think most of those have worked where two people have just clicked rather than actually using the site like a dating site as such...

I hope that you do find what you are looking for, just be careful in your quest so to speak.....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Finding a nice single guy who would be happy sharing their own partner may be hard to come by on here, it does happen though so good luck!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If you are a true swinger

And want a likeminded guy

Then you are in the right place

If you are just looking for a guy and hope a single swinger may change then you are not

Les and I met through swinging and 8 happy long years later (god is it really that long lol)we are still together and happy

Good luck in your search

And yes there are lots of nice polite and friendly single males on this site

No matter what the pussy posse say lol

Take care have fun and good luck

Craig and Les xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Ty to all who replied, and thankyou for all being so nice

Ive been swinging on and off for 5 years now, and i think from reading the postings the thing to do is carry on doing what i enjoy and maybe just maybe ill meet my ideal man along the way.

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By *achaCouple over a year ago

manchester

just go to marks and spencers/tesco/lidl and chat with a nice guy whilst picking fruit!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

well there a lot of ppl got together on here specially in the welsh room, someof em stay just for chat and socials others carry on swinging but as a couple not single. Best of luck anyway kiddo finding someone nice

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By *adchickCouple over a year ago

Cyprus

I met Jason in a swinging club.

Married 5 months later.

We swing as a couple now and the only thing thats been really tough......

Changing to a couple and not being a single female. I had to learn to trust someone else and their judgement, and not just my own.

But it can and it does work.

Don't give up hope.

My advice. Stop looking, enjoy yourself and the right one will come along when you least expect it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"just go to marks and spencers/tesco/lidl and chat with a nice guy whilst picking fruit!

"
Oh i can see it now.. hanging around the fruit n veg and asking some poor sod if he could find me a good sized courgette!

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By *achaCouple over a year ago

manchester

"just go to marks and spencers/tesco/lidl and chat with a nice guy whilst picking fruit!

Oh i can see it now.. hanging around the fruit n veg and asking some poor sod if he could find me a good sized courgette!

you got it!

the point is, it can happen anywhere.

do you like the look of your postman?

then flirt with him!

do you like the look of the checkout guy?

then flirt with him!

do you like the look of that guy that walks past you every morning at work?

then flirt with him!

if you don't want to do that, then maybe we can introduce you to some of our male friends..;-)

not wishing to offend anyone, but i think this is the wrong place to find the man of your dreams..

but best of luck

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By *entadreadMan over a year ago

Essex

"just go to marks and spencers/tesco/lidl and chat with a nice guy whilst picking fruit!

Oh i can see it now.. hanging around the fruit n veg and asking some poor sod if he could find me a good sized courgette!

I would willingly offer to find you that courgette

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I find that a small minority of guys want a relationship but they are always the ones i dont want who aint sexually compatible.

damn! back to the drawing board...haha

If it happens it happens but not looking just enjoying myself wooooooo hooooo.

Kiss many a frog before ya meet ya prince lol

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By *easiders16Couple over a year ago

whitehaven

I met my partner on an adult site, he was shy and reserved when I met him and now hes well corrupted lol. Its handy when you find a mate who shares your swinging lifestyle right from the start.

Marie xx

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman over a year ago

little house on the praire

I met my boyfriend in a sneazy backstreet adult cinema three years ago and we are blissfully happy, never a cross word about swinging.

Not one to tell the grandkids though lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

wow - this could be me! Im so glad i came across this thread!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm not actively looking, but if the right woman comes along, love can pop up anywhere, so never say never

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i know a nice young lady who has just started a relationship with someone on here.

and to be honest, if the right girl came along i would be only too pleased to start one myself, assuming we were compatible.

so yes, keep enjoying yourself and you never know........

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Been there and got the tshirt im afraid. and dont want to go there again so have everything locked away(feelings) where no one can get to it without a sledgehammer.

If they ever manage to knock down the wall then i may concede defeat but i cant see it happening.

cynical i know. sorry

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Been there and got the tshirt im afraid. and dont want to go there again so have everything locked away(feelings) where no one can get to it without a sledgehammer.

If they ever manage to knock down the wall then i may concede defeat but i cant see it happening.

cynical i know. sorry

omg chick

that me to a T

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

that makes three of us then lol!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i done it once, and nevvvvvvvvvvvver again, i would never ever try to 'be' with a guy i met from swinging never never never once put me off for a lifetime!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Been there and got the tshirt im afraid. and dont want to go there again so have everything locked away(feelings) where no one can get to it without a sledgehammer.

If they ever manage to knock down the wall then i may concede defeat but i cant see it happening.

cynical i know. sorry

omg chick

that me to a T

make that three of us! i made the mistake of "falling" for a fb but he had his "rules" to live by which included never having a real relationship with a fb....i've learned (i think!! lol)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"just go to marks and spencers/tesco/lidl and chat with a nice guy whilst picking fruit!

Oh i can see it now.. hanging around the fruit n veg and asking some poor sod if he could find me a good sized courgette!

you got it!

the point is, it can happen anywhere.

do you like the look of your postman?

then flirt with him!

do you like the look of the checkout guy?

then flirt with him!

do you like the look of that guy that walks past you every morning at work?

then flirt with him!

if you don't want to do that, then maybe we can introduce you to some of our male friends..;-)

not wishing to offend anyone, but i think this is the wrong place to find the man of your dreams..

but best of luck

Totally disagree i met my hubby on a site just like this and hes the man of my dreams

Just don't go out there looking for it, just have some fun and see what comes along

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By *obbytupperMan over a year ago

Menston near Ilkley

Monogamy isn't that a type of hardwood?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Monogamy isn't that a type of hardwood?"

or you could try mdf (my dream fella)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Monogamy isn't that a type of hardwood?

or you could try mdf (my dream fella)

Very clever !!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Is not looking

never have..i always have fun

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By *he Happy ManMan over a year ago

Merseyside

"Im single and dont want to be

So far ive had no horrible mail on here but get loads of men mail me who say they want a longterm relationship but really they are wanting a fuck buddy.

Am i just being naive? I just figured if i wanted to meet a sky diver id join a parachuting club, so if i want to meet a guy who swings..... "

Wow you are so sexy I can't believe you can't find what you want. Is 25 miles too far away lol?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We actually met on another swinging site almost 2 years ago- neither of us were looking for love but it just happened- we are now engaged . we do still swing occasionally but it did take a while for us to adapt to swinging as a couple rather than singles - we actually left the site for a while to settle into our relationship. Just enjoy your time on fab and you never know, love happens when you are least looking for it- so good luck xxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Thanks to everyone who said really constructive things on here. I met a wonderful guy and my fingers are crossed that he likes me too...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hey Rubberdolly, really pleased for you!

I would welcome the opportunity to form a lasting relationship with someone that has the same outlook on sex as I have, I have met men from dating sites and scared them half to death with my antics lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

ive just come off plenty fish site wanted to meet lass for relationship but 99.9 lasses be horrified you mention swinging and all the lasses in clubs up here with someone .

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By *ndy_onlyMan over a year ago

dunstable

All the best to you Rubberdolly

we met at a club and agganged to met outside of that place. All I can say is thank god for snow!!! We did not met at the hotel and just bonk...we wated for a week and met for a drink. Just spur of the moment thing Both free that night.

We have been together ever since, and are getting married later this year.

So it does work but, always trust your guy feelings

A n A

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

It seems im not the only one to meet people off regular dating sites , only to scare them half to death by being so forward in the bedroom!

It does make me smile though to see how many singles are on here and Plenty of fish, but with oh so sweet and innocent profiles on there lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"ive just come off plenty fish site wanted to meet lass for relationship but 99.9 lasses be horrified you mention swinging and all the lasses in clubs up here with someone .

well who ever that was they didnt last long on here lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

From my experience you have "players" no matter what type of site your on!

However, meeting someone on a dating site - well sometimes they just think their luck is in as they've met someone who enjoys sex lol!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

i met the love of my life on a site like rthis ,,, we agrred to stop swinginging ,, but i found out after 18 months.... that the pull . what ever it was ,,, was just too strong to resist ,,, we split up for different reasons ,,, but i thank swingingin for introducing me to a lady that truly lit my fire ,,,,, in tears now ,,, lol wot a wuss

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

ps ...... im pissed

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