FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swingers Chat > the on no cannot accommodate moan
the on no cannot accommodate moan
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As a person living in a shared house I find it hard to get the place to myself and host. Its rare but does happen and has happened. You can ask my last meet where we ended up.
Reading through the forums ive come to find that if a guy cannot accommodate then that means he is either married or has a gf. Is some cases it maybe true.
So why is it every one gets tarnished with same brush.
Like most people I would like to meet in a natural place first. But id like to know why would you want every tom dick and harry in the bed you have to sleep in. Could some one fill me in on that please. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
I can't accommodate, so if the guy can't its very difficult to meet. However I don't assume he's married. Past experience has taught me that 9 times out of 10 he is, but I live in hope.  |
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"As a person living in a shared house I find it hard to get the place to myself and host. Its rare but does happen and has happened. You can ask my last meet where we ended up.
Reading through the forums ive come to find that if a guy cannot accommodate then that means he is either married or has a gf. Is some cases it maybe true.
So why is it every one gets tarnished with same brush.
Like most people I would like to meet in a natural place first. But id like to know why would you want every tom dick and harry in the bed you have to sleep in. Could some one fill me in on that please."
If that's your reason then put it on your profile. I've seen a lot of single male profiles that say I cannot accom because I house share/have kids here/would prefer to meet on neutral ground etc. lots of people choose to meet In their home I assume to save on costs etc or if they don't drive it's easier that's up to them. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"Good points but can you understand where I am coming from?"
You are on a site where men outnumber women about 10 to 1. Its amazing what women can do without censure that men get shouted at about. its not fair, but its life.
As I said, I cannot accommodate. Not one person has ever messaged me asking if I am married, they just ask to meet in a hotel. Maybe have an alternate plan on your profile so women know you are making an effort. Some women don't want to invite a strange man into their home. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't assume they are married but I will ask why they can't accom. I know some will still lie, but so far I think I have sussed most of them out.
I prefer to accom/travel and play in someone's home as it's usually more comfortable and I can't afford to pay for hotels every time I want to play. I'm happy to have a coffee meet first though to see if we're compatible, but 9/10 times I'll meet with a view to playing as I'll have chatted for a bit on here/by text and am 99% sure I want to play. Yes I play in the bed I sleep in, but I wad the sheets every now and then!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
But id like to know why would you want every tom dick and harry in the bed you have to sleep in. Could some one fill me in on that please."
While I understand your frustration about peoples attitude to your circumstances, you kind of blot your copy book with your last comment...correct me if I'm wrong but you wouldn't want any tom dick or harry in the bed you sleep in but if we met you as a couple, you'd expect to be allowed into ours? |
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By *iamp86Man
over a year ago
preston |
I'm in the single guy/can't accom due to kids category added to that have busy work life which limits when I'm available as I gotta pay the mortgage somehow.
And then almost nobodies interested on the one week I have the house free !!!
Sometimes we just can't win can we??
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"
Reading through the forums ive come to find that if a guy cannot accommodate then that means he is either married or has a gf. Is some cases it maybe true.
So why is it every one gets tarnished with same brush.
"
It may not be true in every case but as long as it is true more often than it isn't then it will be used as a filter. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"I'm in the single guy/can't accom due to kids category added to that have busy work life which limits when I'm available as I gotta pay the mortgage somehow.
And then almost nobodies interested on the one week I have the house free !!!
Sometimes we just can't win can we??
"
I can assure you that happens to us single ladies too. Time of the month? Boiler broken and house like the Arctic? The only holiday that year? Multiple messages. House free and no prior plans at all? Tumbles. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can't accommodate. I don't want to take people home. Meeting in a neutral place means either party is free to leave,no awkward moments when they want you to go or vice versa. |
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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago
In a crisp poke on the A814 |
I dont accommodate....
So meeting men that dont isnt an option....
Putting your reasons down on profile wont make any difference, people will still assume....
Let them! And find someone that doesnt have problem with it.... |
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I don't invite anyone into my home who won't invite me into theirs for whatever reason after one playmate said he'd never invite people into his house it's not a knocking shop.
Told him to get dressed and get the fuck out of my house as neither was mine!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can accom in the week but not at weekends, I also choose not to go yo strangers homes (safety thing) so I prefer to meet at a club or for special guys a hotel (happy to split costs, but he needs to book/arrange).
I suppose I am guilty of assuming guys that can't accom are attached and on my part that really is double standards, as I can't accomm & I'm completly single. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We generally don't accom for guys simply because yes 90% are married. We do not want to risk bringing that into our home. So we ask either guys accom or a neutral venue.
We personally couldn't care if you are or not it is on your congounce if you cheat not ours. If you accom then its left on your doorstep to deal with. We know there are some guys with some genuin circumstances but alot are married so we decide to keep this as a rule so we don't get caught out.
Plus we don't want are neighbours seeing us bring in different guy each week.
On th other side of things we also will not meet a guy if we actually know they are married. So married men please do not start messaging us after reading the above
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"
But id like to know why would you want every tom dick and harry in the bed you have to sleep in. Could some one fill me in on that please.
While I understand your frustration about peoples attitude to your circumstances, you kind of blot your copy book with your last comment...correct me if I'm wrong but you wouldn't want any tom dick or harry in the bed you sleep in but if we met you as a couple, you'd expect to be allowed into ours?"
^^^^Ooooh this!!!
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"the one that makes me laugh is cant travel or accomadate so its like wtf?"
I have that on my profile. I can't accom as I have my lad living with me and I can't travel as I don't drive but have stated on my profile than I can use public transport within reason. Or meet in a local hotel. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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he must be talking about our profile:-we won't meet a guy unless he can accommodate,no matter what reason they give:-men do lie!,and adultery is still grounds for divorce hands up those who would like to be named in any divorce petition??
If we wanted to use hotels we would say so in our profile,it def says we wont,problem is a lot of guys get dyslexic if they think they can get their ends away! |
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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago
In a crisp poke on the A814 |
"But id like to know why would you want every tom dick and harry in the bed you have to sleep in. Could some one fill me in on that please."
MOST of the meets I have had, single and couple, we never got anywhere near the bed.....  |
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"I don't invite anyone into my home who won't invite me into theirs for whatever reason after one playmate said he'd never invite people into his house it's not a knocking shop.
Told him to get dressed and get the fuck out of my house as neither was mine! "
I hate to say it but I agree. I always ask why they cannot accommodate and I have heard some corkers ( as posted on other threads). If his house is too good then mine is too...
Cannot accommodate AND only daytime meets is a suspicious one for me... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Cannot accommodate AND only daytime meets is a suspicious one for me..."
I think this is true, only able to accomodate alone is no indicator but it's the other clues, like you say daytime meets, also things like no face pics, overuse of the word discrete, and there are others... Non in isolation are a problem but they all give a picture.
Back to the original point, I've played as a single guy and believe me being able to accomodate made a massive difference to me. |
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"I don't invite anyone into my home who won't invite me into theirs for whatever reason after one playmate said he'd never invite people into his house it's not a knocking shop.
Told him to get dressed and get the fuck out of my house as neither was mine!
I hate to say it but I agree. I always ask why they cannot accommodate and I have heard some corkers ( as posted on other threads). If his house is too good then mine is too...
Cannot accommodate AND only daytime meets is a suspicious one for me..."
My ex-husband sold his four bed home and moved into his mums one bed flat to look after her. He sleeps on a sofa bed in her lounge, so if he were on here he wouldn't be able to accommodate and he's 100% single, so I don't assume a man is married.
I've met men that accommodate but throw a blanket on the floor in the lounge as they don't want you in their bed...I don't stay! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Good points but can you understand where I am coming from?"
Yes, of course. The reason I always tell any single guy who asks to put a short line in their profile which explains why they can't accommodate, is to 'head it off at the pass'.
There are plenty of genuine reasons why a single guy can't accomm, so why let anyone jump to the conclusion/assumption that you are married when you aren't, all for the sake of a few seconds adding a few words to show that you're only human? |
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"We tend to go for guys who can accomedate because we don't. That doesn't mean we don't play with those that can't or won't.
Frankly I don't see why putting a reason why you can't accomedate helps. A guy who is married can just as easily say he can't comes ate due to house share or living with relatives as a genuine single guy.  If they going to lie about being single they will lie about why they can't accomedate
"
Indeed, that's why I don't meet those that can't accommodate for any reason!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Frankly I don't see why putting a reason why you can't accomedate helps. A guy who is married can just as easily say he can't accommodate due to house share or living with relatives as a genuine single guy. If they going to lie about being single they will lie about why they can't accommodate. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a person living in a shared house I find it hard to get the place to myself and host. Its rare but does happen and has happened. You can ask my last meet where we ended up.
Reading through the forums ive come to find that if a guy cannot accommodate then that means he is either married or has a gf. Is some cases it maybe true.
So why is it every one gets tarnished with same brush.
Like most people I would like to meet in a natural place first. But id like to know why would you want every tom dick and harry in the bed you have to sleep in. Could some one fill me in on that please."
It's a shame really as some of us have genuine reasons for not being able to accommodate. I happen to have my own place but i rent out part of it which hinders my ability to entertain with plenty of freedom. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't invite anyone into my home who won't invite me into theirs for whatever reason after one playmate said he'd never invite people into his house it's not a knocking shop.
Told him to get dressed and get the fuck out of my house as neither was mine!
I hate to say it but I agree. I always ask why they cannot accommodate and I have heard some corkers ( as posted on other threads). If his house is too good then mine is too...
Cannot accommodate AND only daytime meets is a suspicious one for me..."
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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago
In a crisp poke on the A814 |
"Supply and demand.
There are a ton of single guys out there who can accom so if thats what people prefer then they have no need to look for guys who cant."
If people were complaining about not being able to find others that accommodate, that would be a fair point.....
But it only seems to be the ones that dont accommodate and complain about not getting meets that start these kind of threads..... |
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OP, it really does not matter much what reason you put on your profile for not being able to accommodate, either nobody on here will believe you or they won't even read the text you have spent time writing to try and give as much info about you as possible.
Personally my home is my own private place. I am married and even if I could accommodate (and I could in the past), I would always prefer an external venue...much easier to leave if things are not going well!  |
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By *andACouple
over a year ago
glasgow |
"Supply and demand.
There are a ton of single guys out there who can accom so if thats what people prefer then they have no need to look for guys who cant.
If people were complaining about not being able to find others that accommodate, that would be a fair point.....
But it only seems to be the ones that dont accommodate and complain about not getting meets that start these kind of threads....."
Yeah, but that was our point. The supply is plentiful so there's no need for people to look outwith their preferences (for single guys who cant accom).
It's not really an issue for us though as we dont meet single guys anyway. |
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Thanks for all the replies. Reading through them I see its an mixed opinion.
Dont get me wrong. I don't have a problem with getting meets etc. It was more asking what people thought of it and too see others had the predicament. I just dont know how to say to the house mates "can u sod off for the night I got people coming over"lol
Seems its about time I got my own place and yes you can all come to the house warming party.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can't accommodate, so if the guy can't its very difficult to meet. However I don't assume he's married. Past experience has taught me that 9 times out of 10 he is, but I live in hope. "
oh this is sooooo my favourite subject.....same here, id never be judgemental but so many who apparently can accommodate but when it comes down to it, often have a brother/uncle/mate staying so its a no no. |
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Oh, the joys of swinging! It's all become soo domestic.
I do accomodate but I find that it is more fun to accomodate someone when there's chemistry and they aren't in a hurry to leave, as in a weekend. My idea of swinging is to get to know someone, have fun, sex etc and do stuff.
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"Supply and demand.
There are a ton of single guys out there who can accom so if thats what people prefer then they have no need to look for guys who cant.
If people were complaining about not being able to find others that accommodate, that would be a fair point.....
But it only seems to be the ones that dont accommodate and complain about not getting meets that start these kind of threads....."
Funny that isn't it! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We can't accom due to teens being at home and starting exam leave, and a 20 ish yr old who.works split shifts, we find some people get a bit uppity about it.. but we just move on....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for all the replies. Reading through them I see its an mixed opinion.
Dont get me wrong. I don't have a problem with getting meets etc. It was more asking what people thought of it and too see others had the predicament. I just dont know how to say to the house mates "can u sod off for the night I got people coming over"lol
Seems its about time I got my own place and yes you can all come to the house warming party.
"
If I were a single guy in your position I'd accommodate just to piss my housemates off while I left them to their X-Box games!  R |
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"Thanks for all the replies. Reading through them I see its an mixed opinion.
Dont get me wrong. I don't have a problem with getting meets etc. It was more asking what people thought of it and too see others had the predicament. I just dont know how to say to the house mates "can u sod off for the night I got people coming over"lol
Seems its about time I got my own place and yes you can all come to the house warming party.
If I were a single guy in your position I'd accommodate just to piss my housemates off while I left them to their X-Box games! R"
Might have to do that next sat after the social |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I won't meet anyone as a first meet at my front door. It has to be a pub/cafe or similar.
Reading the forums shows there are a fair few problem people out there |
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By *owlmMan
over a year ago
Wakefield |
"As a person living in a shared house I find it hard to get the place to myself and host. Its rare but does happen and has happened. You can ask my last meet where we ended up.
Reading through the forums ive come to find that if a guy cannot accommodate then that means he is either married or has a gf. Is some cases it maybe true.
So why is it every one gets tarnished with same brush.
Like most people I would like to meet in a natural place first. But id like to know why would you want every tom dick and harry in the bed you have to sleep in. Could some one fill me in on that please."
i cant accomodate because of trouble in the neighbourhood recently and it has become an unofficial 'neighbourhood watch' area. its a true story. |
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"As a person living in a shared house I find it hard to get the place to myself and host. Its rare but does happen and has happened. You can ask my last meet where we ended up.
Reading through the forums ive come to find that if a guy cannot accommodate then that means he is either married or has a gf. Is some cases it maybe true.
So why is it every one gets tarnished with same brush.
Like most people I would like to meet in a natural place first. But id like to know why would you want every tom dick and harry in the bed you have to sleep in. Could some one fill me in on that please.
i cant accomodate because of trouble in the neighbourhood recently and it has become an unofficial 'neighbourhood watch' area. its a true story. "
Forgive my ignorance, but what has neighbourhood watch got to do with who you invite into your home?  |
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By *aturasqCouple
over a year ago
Hertfordshire |
"As a person living in a shared house I find it hard to get the place to myself and host. Its rare but does happen and has happened. You can ask my last meet where we ended up.
Reading through the forums ive come to find that if a guy cannot accommodate then that means he is either married or has a gf. Is some cases it maybe true.
So why is it every one gets tarnished with same brush.
Like most people I would like to meet in a natural place first. But id like to know why would you want every tom dick and harry in the bed you have to sleep in. Could some one fill me in on that please.
i cant accomodate because of trouble in the neighbourhood recently and it has become an unofficial 'neighbourhood watch' area. its a true story.
Forgive my ignorance, but what has neighbourhood watch got to do with who you invite into your home? "
Had me wondering too ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've experienced a different problem, I can accomodate, though I find women keener to host than be hosted, which means I'm always driving!"
That's because women like their own bed and feel comfortable in their own zone, I would think its weird if when I was single a girl would want to come to mine on first date and if they did it was only to have a nose and see if I was single ,
it's a fact of life , and even if you picked someone up in a pub it's unlikely she will go back to yours, but almost definitely go back to hers.
Most women have kids and babysitter sits unrealistic for them to go back to yours in a proper date scenario so theoretically this should transfer back to fab but only if they don't think your weird.
Btw to broach the subject I would say about half way through the evening I was thinking I don't want to take you back to mine yet as you look a bit stalkerish if you get hit your in for a shagging if not move on to the next
Just my opinion
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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what we find odd is some folks definition of "can accommodate":-if that meant being able to provide a hotel(or even a car in some guys eyes!)then everybody on this site can probably accommodate in those ways! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a person living in a shared house I find it hard to get the place to myself and host. Its rare but does happen and has happened. You can ask my last meet where we ended up.
Reading through the forums ive come to find that if a guy cannot accommodate then that means he is either married or has a gf. Is some cases it maybe true.
So why is it every one gets tarnished with same brush.
Like most people I would like to meet in a natural place first. But id like to know why would you want every tom dick and harry in the bed you have to sleep in. Could some one fill me in on that please.
i cant accomodate because of trouble in the neighbourhood recently and it has become an unofficial 'neighbourhood watch' area. its a true story.
Forgive my ignorance, but what has neighbourhood watch got to do with who you invite into your home?
Had me wondering too !"
And us! Makes no sense at all  |
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"As a person living in a shared house I find it hard to get the place to myself and host. Its rare but does happen and has happened. You can ask my last meet where we ended up.
Reading through the forums ive come to find that if a guy cannot accommodate then that means he is either married or has a gf. Is some cases it maybe true.
So why is it every one gets tarnished with same brush.
Like most people I would like to meet in a natural place first. But id like to know why would you want every tom dick and harry in the bed you have to sleep in. Could some one fill me in on that please.
i cant accomodate because of trouble in the neighbourhood recently and it has become an unofficial 'neighbourhood watch' area. its a true story.
Forgive my ignorance, but what has neighbourhood watch got to do with who you invite into your home?
Had me wondering too !
And us! Makes no sense at all "
Oh come on.... everyone knows people on swinging sites turn up half naked in a gimp mask waving an 18" double ender in the air. |
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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
"As a person living in a shared house I find it hard to get the place to myself and host. Its rare but does happen and has happened. You can ask my last meet where we ended up.
Reading through the forums ive come to find that if a guy cannot accommodate then that means he is either married or has a gf. Is some cases it maybe true.
So why is it every one gets tarnished with same brush.
Like most people I would like to meet in a natural place first. But id like to know why would you want every tom dick and harry in the bed you have to sleep in. Could some one fill me in on that please.
i cant accomodate because of trouble in the neighbourhood recently and it has become an unofficial 'neighbourhood watch' area. its a true story.
Forgive my ignorance, but what has neighbourhood watch got to do with who you invite into your home?
Had me wondering too !
And us! Makes no sense at all
Oh come on.... everyone knows people on swinging sites turn up half naked in a gimp mask waving an 18" double ender in the air."
hahahaha. Love it. I just spluttered my cup of tea reading that! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can't accommodate as I live with my family but it doesn't stop people trying to work a way around it, at times it can be annoying but when I want fun I sort things out so my home is free. |
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