FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Men to women ratio
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"The men to women ratio on here is ridiculous lol.When I checked there was 55 women to 300+ men it’s no wonder it’s hard to get conversations going on here. Now I’m not complaining it’s obvious that the women just have it better than the men here..I’m just wondering what the advice is from the experiences swingers here.I always read a profile before I send a message and always include a face pic (I’m not bad looking but not ripped either). So for the men: What do ye find works to stand out from the crowd? For the ladies: What do ye like to see among the “how you x” and dick pic messages " I can assure you the women don't have it easier than the men. Out of those 300 men there may be 2 that read profiles, don't send a stupid 'fuk now' message or don't act like cavemen. | |||
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"I’ve read a lot of women’s profiles saying that men send them abusive messages etc when they don’t get a reply. To be honest I think that sort of behaviour should be shown to a moderator or admin and definitely warrants a ban.." Even if you report the message or profile and it is removed, absolutely nothing stops them from setting up another account from a different email. We have blocked profiles only to get a mountain of abuse off another profile two mins later. | |||
"I’ve read a lot of women’s profiles saying that men send them abusive messages etc when they don’t get a reply. To be honest I think that sort of behaviour should be shown to a moderator or admin and definitely warrants a ban.." I agree with the above And would also say that a lot of messages go unread too | |||
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"The men to women ratio on here is ridiculous lol.When I checked there was 55 women to 300+ men it’s no wonder it’s hard to get conversations going on here. Now I’m not complaining it’s obvious that the women just have it better than the men here..I’m just wondering what the advice is from the experiences swingers here.I always read a profile before I send a message and always include a face pic (I’m not bad looking but not ripped either). So for the men: What do ye find works to stand out from the crowd? For the ladies: What do ye like to see among the “how you x” and dick pic messages " I like to see a well thought out, well written, interesting profile with a variety of pics. Always a good place to start. P. | |||
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" I like to see a well thought out, well written, interesting profile with a variety of pics. Always a good place to start. P. " Exactly this. And if they are into teenagers or dogging I give them a miss as well, but that's just me | |||
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"The men to women ratio on here is ridiculous lol.When I checked there was 55 women to 300+ men it’s no wonder it’s hard to get conversations going on here. Now I’m not complaining it’s obvious that the women just have it better than the men here..I’m just wondering what the advice is from the experiences swingers here.I always read a profile before I send a message and always include a face pic (I’m not bad looking but not ripped either). So for the men: What do ye find works to stand out from the crowd? For the ladies: What do ye like to see among the “how you x” and dick pic messages I can assure you the women don't have it easier than the men. Out of those 300 men there may be 2 that read profiles, don't send a stupid 'fuk now' message or don't act like cavemen. " ........and even if you do the chances of a reply of any kind are still around one in 50, most of whom will be a no. It is what it is - part numbers game, part luck and 100% attraction and what the recipient is feeling at the time. It's never personal, even if the person you message fails to respond at all. They don't know you at the end of the day. | |||
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"Don't be dick Treat people with respect Get yourself stuck into the Forums (I've often been approached off the back of the forums) And bare in mind those statistics you've just mentioned, be realistic and don't get frustrated. Remember you won't be everyones cup of tea (even if they're yours). But generally decent guys will do ok on here. Especially the more you get known on the wider scene (if the swingers scene is what your here for of course)." Spot on buddy! Couldn't have put it better myself. | |||
"I hadn’t thought of it that way Women have a LOT of shit to sift through I suppose " Even though this is a swingers or sex sites don’t be lazy .. most women will want a tailored message... l suggest looking at the daily updates and be inspired by their updates.. or something that caught your eye in their profile as most men don’t bother to read them and women can tell.. women on here clearly want sex but also not to be disrespected.... just because we are. Xx Venus x | |||
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"I’ve read a lot of women’s profiles saying that men send them abusive messages etc when they don’t get a reply. To be honest I think that sort of behaviour should be shown to a moderator or admin and definitely warrants a ban.. Even if you report the message or profile and it is removed, absolutely nothing stops them from setting up another account from a different email. We have blocked profiles only to get a mountain of abuse off another profile two mins later. " No matter how much you feel you need to respond you can only win by never engaging with such morons! Mark as unread, delete, block, move on. They soon get bored when you don’t play their sick game. | |||
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"The men to women ratio on here is ridiculous lol.When I checked there was 55 women to 300+ men it’s no wonder it’s hard to get conversations going on here. Now I’m not complaining it’s obvious that the women just have it better than the men here..I’m just wondering what the advice is from the experiences swingers here.I always read a profile before I send a message and always include a face pic (I’m not bad looking but not ripped either). So for the men: What do ye find works to stand out from the crowd? For the ladies: What do ye like to see among the “how you x” and dick pic messages " We like to see a message that shows our profile has been read and respected and the message is from someone who sounds like a match who is local and respectful. Someone who sounds friendly and has a verified account. Strange how many people don't read profiles and it shows. | |||
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" We like to see a message that shows our profile has been read and respected and the message is from someone who sounds like a match who is local and respectful. Someone who sounds friendly and has a verified account. Strange how many people don't read profiles and it shows. " Sums it up for us | |||
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"I know on a swinger site it's more men to women, but that's because there are more married men on here. I've worked for a dating agency, where its mainly women looking for love, and a truly single man is a scarcity. Women struggle like men on here to find and therefore meet guys, partially because guys don't put effort into their profiles with minimal effort into the text, (remember women prefer reading to pics), lack of decent pictures, guys are visual, hence porn mags as opposed to 50 shades of grey, to be fair I find guys boring if all they can talk about and are only interested in 'getting it on'. " Wow. That was so insightful. That’s for sharing. X | |||
"Don’t rely on here. Get out to clubs and meet people. That’s the only way you’ll be taken seriously until you build up a rapport with people. " | |||
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"The men to women ratio on here is ridiculous lol.When I checked there was 55 women to 300+ men it’s no wonder it’s hard to get conversations going on here. Now I’m not complaining it’s obvious that the women just have it better than the men here..I’m just wondering what the advice is from the experiences swingers here.I always read a profile before I send a message and always include a face pic (I’m not bad looking but not ripped either). So for the men: What do ye find works to stand out from the crowd? For the ladies: What do ye like to see among the “how you x” and dick pic messages " 3rd time lucky at typing this! I echo Keeley's comments that women don't have it easier than men as the ratios create their own problems for them. Men have been estimated to outnumber women on here between 12 and 15 to 1. Logically this would point at them receiving 12 to 15 times the amount of mail that guys do, but in reality it is far far greater... For two simple reasons. - Women and Men tend to approach Fab the wrong way. Too many men get impatient and go on the hunt more widely and too many women just sit back and rely on the right men contacting them. Both highly flawed strategies. In my last year and a half perhaps of being on my singles profile regularly before I fell for my OH, I switched this strategy around and made a principle of not sending out a single message to make initial contact whatsoever, aside from one first message to the lady who would become my beloved as she mentioned on the forums that it would feel lovely to her if I did so and I like her feeling lovely! I reasoned that I had no wish to add to the overflowing inboxes that women and couples had to cope with and that if someone was interested in me they'd contact me anyway? It made not one jot of difference to my amount of fun from Fab either, I had regular meets I chose from those who contacted me like a single lady typically does and my amount of messages unlike a single lady's was entirely manageable. IMHO the right strategy for a woman is to turn huntress herself, block all single guys then go hunting for the ones she rather likes? It requires more thought on her part and granted she will get rejection from time to time which hurts women more than it does men generally, but it would be far far less time consuming for her in the long run. Ergo guys send a huge amount more initial messages than women do to the opposite sex in general. -The messages a lady receives from different types of guys aren't representative of the proportions of those types on site. Though they can be split up far more diversely, for simplicity's sake let's divide men on site into 3 distinct camps; those who generally appeal to more on site due to them being considerate, highly imaginative, possessing intellect, having no problem with putting effort in where needed and them maintaining a good standard of hygiene and looking after themselves physically to a certain degree. And above all, them "getting it" mentally. These guys will be the most sought after and will probably represent about 15% of guys on here. Then there is the majority group of chaps on here which probably account for as much as 60%; the guys who are average in most regards, do alright with women in the real world usually, but find the ratios on here hard to adapt round, and though they may possess some of the above attributes generally don't have all of them. Then there is the 3rd group,the rump end of guys who make up perhaps 25% of the blokes on Fab. These are the ones that are generally pretty lacking upstairs, think that a picture of their floppy nob over a toilet bowl will make them irresistible to the opposite sex as swingers are gagging for cock 24/7, and have a sense of entitlement that they deserve a good sex life with fuck all effort put in because everyone else is at it. When they don't get it they will blame others or some random unjust "ism" such as their age, race or the fact they don't possess a 12" cock being the root cause, when in reality it is them being utterly unmarketable to ladies in their current format and them being too lazy or stupid to do anything about it. They joined because they heard from Baz in the pub that "they'd be fighting off the fanny easy" if they did so and often have chips on their shoulders when they find it isn't the case. These 3 groups message women entirely differently. The group in high demand send out little messages generally. Reasons being that those who ARE already meeting them take up a fair amount of time as they know they've found a reliable meet who scratches all those individual itches wonderfully and will want to meet regularly rather than rely on others. And as such men are also more in demand they are much more choosy than the other groups so will think a lot more about who would really shape up to be a meet for them that flicks their switches and vice versa in every way, much like a woman looks for. The biggest group on the site will send out much more messages to women that appeal to them in some way physically in general, reasoning that the majority of replies will be a "No" anyway. They will get a modicum of success here and there, but the ratios will still be against them. The rump end of blokes on the other hand will carpet bomb messages out, hitting every single woman/couple within a certain radius till they hit their maximum message amount as "any hole's a goal" and besides after getting their dick's wet they're looking forward to Baz first bumping them, saying "Yes mate!" and perhaps getting them a pint in for the achievement of getting their nuts off. Their messages will be ill thought out utter shite that generally repulse anyone possessing a brain of the opposite sex. So as a result of how these groups operate message-wise, a single lady is likely to receive about what I'd estimate to be about five hundred times as many messages as a guy of her "type" would. Of those messages, for the average lady I imagine either none or one will be from the chaps in the bracket she desires most, twenty five to thirty will be from the average guys out there and four hundred and seventy odd will be from the inept drooling fuckwits. Can you see why this may create it's own problems? B | |||
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"Don’t rely on here. Get out to clubs and meet people. That’s the only way you’ll be taken seriously until you build up a rapport with people. " Yep, 100% agree. Those of us who approach in a respectful, intelligent and thoughtful way still have to come across well in ways that are beyond control (natural attraction being an obvious one). Going to clubs and socials has been the clincher for me and I've had an awful lot more success - and more importantly grown genuine friendships with several fabulous women and couples. I'm pretty average in most respects and certainly no adonis, which proves the point beyond doubt. | |||
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"Haha yup. You wouldn’t believe the number of ‘great pics’ messages I get. It’s a very effective filter x " Wow and you have got some amazing pics I see what you mean there :D I love the copy and paste ones that say we both look amazing or have someone else’s name in them and the ones that just can’t read although we have put quite a lot down to read | |||
"Also I hate to break it to you a fair amount of female and couples accounts are actually sad men pretending so unless there picture verified proceed with caution and sometimes those are fake to " Myself and plenty of other single females aren't photo verified and we aren't 'sad men'. I wish people would stop making out like photo verification is this magic thing that almost always stops fakes. | |||
"Also I hate to break it to you a fair amount of female and couples accounts are actually sad men pretending so unless there picture verified proceed with caution and sometimes those are fake to Myself and plenty of other single females aren't photo verified and we aren't 'sad men'. I wish people would stop making out like photo verification is this magic thing that almost always stops fakes." As I said those can be fake to were no photo verified either | |||
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"The men to women ratio on here is ridiculous lol.When I checked there was 55 women to 300+ men it’s no wonder it’s hard to get conversations going on here. Now I’m not complaining it’s obvious that the women just have it better than the men here..I’m just wondering what the advice is from the experiences swingers here.I always read a profile before I send a message and always include a face pic (I’m not bad looking but not ripped either). So for the men: What do ye find works to stand out from the crowd? For the ladies: What do ye like to see among the “how you x” and dick pic messages " thats less than 6-1 not bad odds considering 5 send a dick pic with first message leaving a one on one omg the odds are stacked against many | |||
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"Just wondering OP (or anyone) how is the ratio of men to women checked on here exactly?" it says how many are online somewhere but i dont think their is an actual ratio it fluctuates a lot | |||
"Just wondering OP (or anyone) how is the ratio of men to women checked on here exactly?" There's been several goes of taking amateur surveys over the years. Most involve using the "whose nearby" function and the "search" function at various differently populated locations around the UK to get a balanced view and in the case of the latter reducing where necessary till the largest demographic of single guys is reduced to under 300? Not possible in all areas but a great deal of them. The last one I believe came up with about a 12 to 1 ratio, which can be assumed to be about anywhere between 12 and 15 due to the amount of fake female profiles I believe? Also there USED to be a ratio of about 9 to 1 years ago, but the single guy proportion increased over the years as Fab became more mainstream. B | |||
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"if women were treated in a better way then there would be more women on here ...the abuse is terrible and its getting worse .... and the sad thing is its done by the few not the majority " Exactly, I've got a severely entitled man messaging right now, he has no photos or info on his profile, it's totally blank and he is demanding to know why I won't meet him immediately for sex. | |||
"if women were treated in a better way then there would be more women on here ...the abuse is terrible and its getting worse .... and the sad thing is its done by the few not the majority Exactly, I've got a severely entitled man messaging right now, he has no photos or info on his profile, it's totally blank and he is demanding to know why I won't meet him immediately for sex. " really...... he's demanding in what way, he's getting aggressive? | |||
"if women were treated in a better way then there would be more women on here ...the abuse is terrible and its getting worse .... and the sad thing is its done by the few not the majority Exactly, I've got a severely entitled man messaging right now, he has no photos or info on his profile, it's totally blank and he is demanding to know why I won't meet him immediately for sex. " Tell him I have you fully booked up for the foreseeable future.... | |||
"if women were treated in a better way then there would be more women on here ...the abuse is terrible and its getting worse .... and the sad thing is its done by the few not the majority Exactly, I've got a severely entitled man messaging right now, he has no photos or info on his profile, it's totally blank and he is demanding to know why I won't meet him immediately for sex. " Thats what the block button is for aggressive people tend to spoil the site. | |||
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"if women were treated in a better way then there would be more women on here ...the abuse is terrible and its getting worse .... and the sad thing is its done by the few not the majority Exactly, I've got a severely entitled man messaging right now, he has no photos or info on his profile, it's totally blank and he is demanding to know why I won't meet him immediately for sex. Thats what the block button is for aggressive people tend to spoil the site." The trouble with blocking this kind of person is; they tend to rejoin with a new profile. The better option is to just not open any future messages from them, so they get bored and move on | |||
"Yup the dreamers, fakes, fantasists, picture collectors, keyboard warriors oh there all here but there are some real people out there you just have to sift through to find them Also one thing everyone should remember though is yes we all know what this site is about but we’re all human and manners cost you nothing but are worth everything " Well said. | |||
"The men to women ratio on here is ridiculous lol.When I checked there was 55 women to 300+ men it’s no wonder it’s hard to get conversations going on here. Now I’m not complaining it’s obvious that the women just have it better than the men here..I’m just wondering what the advice is from the experiences swingers here.I always read a profile before I send a message and always include a face pic (I’m not bad looking but not ripped either). So for the men: What do ye find works to stand out from the crowd? For the ladies: What do ye like to see among the “how you x” and dick pic messages " Where did you get the figures from? | |||