A few days ago, I sent a message to a couple that received an enthusiastic and complimentary reply, and among other things asked if I'd played with a couple before. I was honest and said not per se; I've had threesomes, but they've been my wife and me with someone else, though I am an enthusiastic and thorough learner.
I believe this message has been read, but haven't had a reply to it. I foresee three main possibilities, and they are, in order of likelihood:
1. They were looking for someone with more experience as the third to a couple and decided to cease communication without telling me this, either because there was no point in explaining things to someone they weren't going to talk to again, or because they didn't know whether I was the type who'd get abusive when rejected (both of which are entirely understandable and valid)
2. She mentioned her husband answering a question I'd asked for himself; it's possible he just hasn't been around/available yet to send a response from his end.
3. It just fell through the cracks and got forgotten.
I try to avoid sending follow-up messages, because if someone's decided you're not for them, what would be the point? I don't understand guys who send 5-6 messages in a row despite not getting a reply, it's like pissing in the wind. However, due to how enthusiastic and keen the initial response was, I'm wondering if it might be warranted in this case. If I do message again (basically just to check in, make sure it didn't just fall by the wayside, and assure them that if the reason for the cut contact is #1, no hard feelings and I hope they find what they're looking for), it'll be after giving it an entire week, which I think is a fair amount of time to give someone if, hypothetically, they *intended* to reply but haven't for some reason.
But is even that too much? Should I just cut my losses and accept that it'll remain dangling in limbo? |
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I think you’re overthinking this.
When I’m active on here I get quite a lot of messages (weird, I know, but there it is) and in a busy inbox what tends to stand out is follow ups. Just as long as t
Just as long ans they aren’t arsey about it.
Send a follow up message. You’ve nothing to lose but your uncertainty.
|
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"I think you’re overthinking this.
When I’m active on here I get quite a lot of messages (weird, I know, but there it is) and in a busy inbox what tends to stand out is follow ups. Just as long as t
Just as long ans they aren’t arsey about it.
Send a follow up message. You’ve nothing to lose but your uncertainty.
"
"I'm overthinking this" will be my epitaph. :P |
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By *oxy jWoman 4 weeks ago
somerset |
if they see this on the forum they may think red flag ... people that expect reply's quickly are not going to do well on here people have real lives too not just fab ... but if they've read it as you suspect then id say they are not interested...
not only that it takes alot more than one message to gain interest if they are real swingers |
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"if they see this on the forum they may think red flag ... people that expect reply's quickly are not going to do well on here people have real lives too not just fab ... but if they've read it as you suspect then id say they are not interested...
not only that it takes alot more than one message to gain interest if they are real swingers "
Entirely possible. To clarify, I don't *expect* a reply at all, let alone quickly. I'm perfectly fine with them having decided I'm not for them.  |
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"I think you’re overthinking this.
When I’m active on here I get quite a lot of messages (weird, I know, but there it is) and in a busy inbox what tends to stand out is follow ups. Just as long as t
Just as long ans they aren’t arsey about it.
Send a follow up message. You’ve nothing to lose but your uncertainty.
"
__
This, but I'd give it a couple weeks, since they replied and said he would answer. Its just a message, it won't traumatise them to receive a second message from you. |
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