FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Not feeling attractive
Not feeling attractive
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Single guys outnumber Women/couples by 100-1 so it's always going to be tough. Having a profile of gym pics and a bio that's basically just useless disclaimer that nobody will ever read is not going to help you to stand out.
Another option is, is to go to club, but don't go if your just looking for an easy hook up. |
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I'm bald, a little chub, average cock and I went to a club and just chatted to people, kept a respectful distance and my hands to myself. Now I have an owner couple and a circle of the best and sexiest friends, just being myself. |
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"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid "
I would put your 16 June pic as your profile avatar, and just have your 24 July cock pic in your public gallery for now. Hide all the other pics in your friends gallery, and take some pics using the timer function on your phone, rather than using bathroom mirrors. Also, when it comes to attracting women, less is more, so try to make your pics teasing, with some clothing, and smiles, women love smiles 
Apart from this, it really is a numbers game in Fab! The handful of ladies local to you will have hundreds of guys to choose from, you just need to stand out from the crowd.
Most in here will advise you visit clubs, but those who shout “Whoop whoop yay! Clubs!” usually have a vested interest in the business, so try to ask other single guys for unbiased club advice 
Keep the faith!  |
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You're very attractive! Defo remove disclaimer because it's pointless, maybe say a bit more about your fantasies?
Also most guys claim to love giving oral, so unfortunately it's not something that makes fellas stand out (to me anyway) - Xeno x |
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By *illanelleWoman
over a year ago
Ryde, Isle of Wight |
"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid "
It's not stupid at all. I think everyone struggles with self-image at one time or another. I struggle with it terribly and have days when I loathe myself and how I look.
Also, remember that single men are in the vast majority on this site. Don't take it personally if you don't always find it easy to get a meet.
And FYI, your body looks lush and your veri is lovely |
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By *4G-GBBukCouple
over a year ago
Glasgow/London |
You've more characters on your profile from that disclaimer. Why is it there? Do you know what it means? That specific US law you've mentioned seems to be about Commercial and Business transactions. It's total nonsense.
When we want to meet, we unhide pics, and relax filters. We then get around 200 messages in about an hour, which is fine, and expected but to whittle it down we will be ruthless and stuff like disclaimers with no real thought is the kinda thing that leads to us deleting messages. It sounds a bit mean spirited but it's likely the reality for many here.
Try work on your profile, lose all the rubbish (male half skim reads fast!) and use the space to sell yourself. What can you provide? What can you do? What do you like?
Good luck |
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Take a step back, look at what you do have rather than what other people do. Lifes to short to worry about the little things in life. There are alot of males for females to pick from. Just try to make your 1st messages a good one make it count. Its hard for people to pick from messages and photos alone. Keep you chin up pal  happy fabbing pal |
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For what it's worth, I think you are good looking 
Like other people have said we all go through periods of self-doubt. I think your profile probably the issue and not your physical appearance.
Be kind to yourself xx |
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Don't rely on fab, or any website, to be the source of your wellbeing. If it impacts you negatively, step back and work out how you could stop this, as well as how you could develop it, in the wider world.
Single men have to work very hard here, to try to get traction and become established. The single most emphasised focus is for them to invest in their profiles and how they are getting to know others. Socials and swinging clubs are ideal places to get to know more people. Don't assume that they are instant sex jackpot arenas though.
People here like a huge range of others. You are not unattractive. I don't get all of my partners from fab, it's much better not to have all eggs in 1 basket. It could be better for you to flirt and find partners everywhere, so that lack of results here, isn't too much for you to bare. |
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By *rpeggioCouple
over a year ago
Baughurst |
"I'm bald, a little chub, average cock and I went to a club and just chatted to people, kept a respectful distance and my hands to myself. Now I have an owner couple and a circle of the best and sexiest friends, just being myself."
What's an owner couple? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid "
I find it hard to meet because of my age, lots of women and couples have a low age range.
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Not sure that looks matter that much in the end. Be friendly, be charming, be humble, be brave and take action and get chatting to as many people as you can. Best of luck you are plenty good looking enough to swing  |
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"I'm bald, a little chub, average cock and I went to a club and just chatted to people, kept a respectful distance and my hands to myself. Now I have an owner couple and a circle of the best and sexiest friends, just being myself.
What's an owner couple?"
I'll tell you in private |
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"I'm bald, a little chub, average cock and I went to a club and just chatted to people, kept a respectful distance and my hands to myself. Now I have an owner couple and a circle of the best and sexiest friends, just being myself.
What's an owner couple?"
Actually, I can't, message me and I'll reply |
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"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid
I would put your 16 June pic as your profile avatar, and just have your 24 July cock pic in your public gallery for now. Hide all the other pics in your friends gallery, and take some pics using the timer function on your phone, rather than using bathroom mirrors. Also, when it comes to attracting women, less is more, so try to make your pics teasing, with some clothing, and smiles, women love smiles
Apart from this, it really is a numbers game in Fab! The handful of ladies local to you will have hundreds of guys to choose from, you just need to stand out from the crowd.
Most in here will advise you visit clubs, but those who shout “Whoop whoop yay! Clubs!” usually have a vested interest in the business, so try to ask other single guys for unbiased club advice
Keep the faith! "
I tried clubs and it wasn't for me. It's very expensive venture trying out clubs so I wouldn't recommend it unless you live locally to one and not as fussy as me |
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"Not sure that looks matter that much in the end. Be friendly, be charming, be humble, be brave and take action and get chatting to as many people as you can. Best of luck you are plenty good looking enough to swing "
Looks is irrelevant as I'm seen plenty of swingers on here with plenty of positive verifications, looking like they're having a great time but not the conventional super model or pornstar look |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
"Not sure that looks matter that much in the end. Be friendly, be charming, be humble, be brave and take action and get chatting to as many people as you can. Best of luck you are plenty good looking enough to swing
Looks is irrelevant as I'm seen plenty of swingers on here with plenty of positive verifications, looking like they're having a great time but not the conventional super model or pornstar look"
I had a few people that said to me at weekend you look nice - this kinda made me feel a little in edge as I am chunky guy, no tats, average sized cock
I ended up having a great weeekeed
 |
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"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid
I would put your 16 June pic as your profile avatar, and just have your 24 July cock pic in your public gallery for now. Hide all the other pics in your friends gallery, and take some pics using the timer function on your phone, rather than using bathroom mirrors. Also, when it comes to attracting women, less is more, so try to make your pics teasing, with some clothing, and smiles, women love smiles
Apart from this, it really is a numbers game in Fab! The handful of ladies local to you will have hundreds of guys to choose from, you just need to stand out from the crowd.
Most in here will advise you visit clubs, but those who shout “Whoop whoop yay! Clubs!” usually have a vested interest in the business, so try to ask other single guys for unbiased club advice
Keep the faith!
I tried clubs and it wasn't for me. It's very expensive venture trying out clubs so I wouldn't recommend it unless you live locally to one and not as fussy as me"
I heartily agree |
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Oh most of the time on Fab I feel unattractive but given my age, lack of recent verifications, questionable looks, overly long and complicated profile and spending too much time chatting shit and undermining myself in the politics forum, then I think I am lucky to get any attention at all
Don’t get too bothered by fab as it’s a harsh environment at times and just remind yourself that if it’s not working for you then taking a break from it for a week or three is always a good plan
God luck |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid
I would put your 16 June pic as your profile avatar, and just have your 24 July cock pic in your public gallery for now. Hide all the other pics in your friends gallery, and take some pics using the timer function on your phone, rather than using bathroom mirrors. Also, when it comes to attracting women, less is more, so try to make your pics teasing, with some clothing, and smiles, women love smiles
Apart from this, it really is a numbers game in Fab! The handful of ladies local to you will have hundreds of guys to choose from, you just need to stand out from the crowd.
Most in here will advise you visit clubs, but those who shout “Whoop whoop yay! Clubs!” usually have a vested interest in the business, so try to ask other single guys for unbiased club advice
Keep the faith!
I tried clubs and it wasn't for me. It's very expensive venture trying out clubs so I wouldn't recommend it unless you live locally to one and not as fussy as me"
Clubs are the best way to meet people, especially for single guys and couples.
Always will be the best way. |
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By *umbiyaMan
over a year ago
Halifax |
Surprised you're struggling. Your body is absolutely fine and you look like what a lot of women would be interested in. Only issue is being under 6ft, which is a deal-breaker for most women here. |
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"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid
I would put your 16 June pic as your profile avatar, and just have your 24 July cock pic in your public gallery for now. Hide all the other pics in your friends gallery, and take some pics using the timer function on your phone, rather than using bathroom mirrors. Also, when it comes to attracting women, less is more, so try to make your pics teasing, with some clothing, and smiles, women love smiles
Apart from this, it really is a numbers game in Fab! The handful of ladies local to you will have hundreds of guys to choose from, you just need to stand out from the crowd.
Most in here will advise you visit clubs, but those who shout “Whoop whoop yay! Clubs!” usually have a vested interest in the business, so try to ask other single guys for unbiased club advice
Keep the faith!
I tried clubs and it wasn't for me. It's very expensive venture trying out clubs so I wouldn't recommend it unless you live locally to one and not as fussy as me
Clubs are the best way to meet people, especially for single guys and couples.
Always will be the best way. "
I cannot agree with this statement, speaking as a single guy who has been to several clubs.
Clubs do work well for couples though |
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"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid "
We all have days like that and fab can be a hard place god guys as you outnumber women
You look real good from what I can see, keep with it
Better still , go to a club and mingle |
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Hello OP,
This site is littered with posts such as this one and so few of those people take the advice they seek. However, it's good to see that you have already taken some of the advice given to you by previous posters.
The only thing we could possibly add is to remember that it isn't just you. Many people struggle to find meets, even more so if you have limited availability like us. Rejection happens to everyone, it's not just you, so try not to take rejection personally.
Think of it this way, if you walked down the street and passed a thousand people, how many of them in the split second they walked past you, do you think would want to have sex with you? Realistically that number is likely to be very small indeed. Being on Fab is no different, you have a split second to make a good impression and for people to want to take it further. Those that make the best first impression will always stand out from the other 999.
Good luck |
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We actually had to have a big conversation this week because I’m super self conscious and have times when I literally think I’m hideous and just feel so inferior and constantly compare myself to others. I’m mentally really unkind to myself some times and it really gets me down when I do it. I struggle to get out of my own head, I think on here is easy because I choose which photos and videos to share and I take most of the photos of myself so I can position myself better etc. We love clubs but on a couple of occasions I’ve been completely in my own head comparing myself and ripping myself to shreds which then makes it impossible to approach other people and actually spoils things for both of us, it isn’t sexy to hear your wife insulting herself! Sexiness stems so much from confidence and how you carry yourself, when you feel good, others see and sense it and it makes you more appealing. I’m trying to work on my confidence, but you also need to remember that you aren’t ever going to be everyone’s type.
C x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I've been single for ten years now an I'm only 41. I no what I look like I no I'm a 3 out of ten and I've expected it because that's what I've been told my hole life. so I thought on hear it might be different. Well it's different now I don't get laughed at I just get ignored all I want is a friend. but tomorrow is another day. any advice on how to make friends and get to talk to people would be very appreciated. thanks everyone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I've been single for ten years now an I'm only 41. I no what I look like I no I'm a 3 out of ten and I've expected it because that's what I've been told my hole life. so I thought on hear it might be different. Well it's different now I don't get laughed at I just get ignored all I want is a friend. but tomorrow is another day. any advice on how to make friends and get to talk to people would be very appreciated. thanks everyone."
You are more of a 7 out of 10.. don't put yourself down because others have in your past. You are a good looking man .. |
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"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid "
Did you get your confidence boost in the end OP? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid "
The world of internet dating/swinging/hook ups/whatever is a strange one. It’s challenging to make meaningful connections with like minded people, I think…just be yourself and don’t take it personally when people aren’t interested. It’s their loss at the end of the day
Mrs |
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"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid
I would put your 16 June pic as your profile avatar, and just have your 24 July cock pic in your public gallery for now. Hide all the other pics in your friends gallery, and take some pics using the timer function on your phone, rather than using bathroom mirrors. Also, when it comes to attracting women, less is more, so try to make your pics teasing, with some clothing, and smiles, women love smiles
Apart from this, it really is a numbers game in Fab! The handful of ladies local to you will have hundreds of guys to choose from, you just need to stand out from the crowd.
Most in here will advise you visit clubs, but those who shout “Whoop whoop yay! Clubs!” usually have a vested interest in the business, so try to ask other single guys for unbiased club advice
Keep the faith!
I tried clubs and it wasn't for me. It's very expensive venture trying out clubs so I wouldn't recommend it unless you live locally to one and not as fussy as me
Clubs are the best way to meet people, especially for single guys and couples.
Always will be the best way. "
I totally disagree. Clubs are not for everyone and it does annoy me people keep selling it like it's a taste of pure heaven. In reality, it's just a big minefield like fab is. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I know the feeling OP, Fab can be cruel at times. It's no reflection on you, don't let it get you down. I quit because I felt the same way and took a break. I found clubs work for me rather than the site itself, it's not a sure thing but might be worth a try? Go well |
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"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid
I would put your 16 June pic as your profile avatar, and just have your 24 July cock pic in your public gallery for now. Hide all the other pics in your friends gallery, and take some pics using the timer function on your phone, rather than using bathroom mirrors. Also, when it comes to attracting women, less is more, so try to make your pics teasing, with some clothing, and smiles, women love smiles
Apart from this, it really is a numbers game in Fab! The handful of ladies local to you will have hundreds of guys to choose from, you just need to stand out from the crowd.
Most in here will advise you visit clubs, but those who shout “Whoop whoop yay! Clubs!” usually have a vested interest in the business, so try to ask other single guys for unbiased club advice
Keep the faith!
I tried clubs and it wasn't for me. It's very expensive venture trying out clubs so I wouldn't recommend it unless you live locally to one and not as fussy as me
Clubs are the best way to meet people, especially for single guys and couples.
Always will be the best way.
I totally disagree. Clubs are not for everyone and it does annoy me people keep selling it like it's a taste of pure heaven. In reality, it's just a big minefield like fab is."
Hear here! |
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"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid "
It's very hard for single guys on here as you've got a massive amount of competition from other guys, many well verified. Some say go to a club, some say otherwise! Many Men do well in clubs, they've all got something in common. It's not their looks, they've all got a bit of chat. The ones that sit on their own (Couples included) or just walk without chatting to people are less likely to have fun. In August we had a friendly chatty guy talk to us and we ended up in a room together. So OP and other guys, there's great fun to be had in clubs but you need to be chatty. |
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By *tew008Man
over a year ago
edinburgh |
"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid "
Yup under no illusion I’m an ugly cunt. Other folk have a harder life so I just don’t care most of the time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Why do you feel unattractive? Is it because of a lack of messages/replies? Why are you basing your attractiveness on that?
Men outnumber women on here by a mile. Women get tons of messages a day, so even the good ones often get overlooked because of the bombardment.
That’s doesn’t mean you’re unattractive, you’re just in a pool with a lot of other men so it’s harder to stand out! |
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"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid "
Maybe they just don’t like your profile? |
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By *lexV16Man
over a year ago
Welling |
"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid "
You are good looking guy. If you feel unattractive just because of fab, pause it for a while till you get your confidence back.
If it’s in general, it mental issue, get professional help either from coach or therapist. Nothing to be a shamed of getting professional help. If you have teeth ache you’d go to a dentist, why not to apply same approach. |
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"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid
You are good looking guy. If you feel unattractive just because of fab, pause it for a while till you get your confidence back.
If it’s in general, it mental issue, get professional help either from coach or therapist. Nothing to be a shamed of getting professional help. If you have teeth ache you’d go to a dentist, why not to apply same approach. "
I looked into therapy. Dam it's expensive and wish I was a therapist if that's the money they're making per hour lol |
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"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid "
Everybody has their own hang ups! Mrs here btw I’m the same my face is over my account but I honestly lack so much self confidence xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Hey there i know this sounds super stupid but i feel really unattractive and like i struggle to meet anyone off her is me that im just not good looking or am i just being stupid
I would put your 16 June pic as your profile avatar, and just have your 24 July cock pic in your public gallery for now. Hide all the other pics in your friends gallery, and take some pics using the timer function on your phone, rather than using bathroom mirrors. Also, when it comes to attracting women, less is more, so try to make your pics teasing, with some clothing, and smiles, women love smiles
Apart from this, it really is a numbers game in Fab! The handful of ladies local to you will have hundreds of guys to choose from, you just need to stand out from the crowd.
Most in here will advise you visit clubs, but those who shout “Whoop whoop yay! Clubs!” usually have a vested interest in the business, so try to ask other single guys for unbiased club advice
Keep the faith!
I tried clubs and it wasn't for me. It's very expensive venture trying out clubs so I wouldn't recommend it unless you live locally to one and not as fussy as me
Clubs are the best way to meet people, especially for single guys and couples.
Always will be the best way.
I totally disagree. Clubs are not for everyone and it does annoy me people keep selling it like it's a taste of pure heaven. In reality, it's just a big minefield like fab is."
I agree with you about clubs
Mrs |
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