FabSwingers.com > Forums > Scotland > How do people actually find a meet these days??
How do people actually find a meet these days??
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Is it just me or is becoming increasingly more difficult to find a meet these days?? I've msgd profiles I'm interested in and pretty much just get ignored! I appreciate I'm not everyone's taste but it's really annoying when folk outline what they're looking for and even though you match it you just get blanked.
Do others find this to be the case or am I just really unlucky haha? Do most folk go to party nights and have the joys of a social experience or are yous doing something different? Genuinely interested as the site isn't much fun these days. |
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By (user no longer on site) 6 weeks ago
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"Is it just me or is becoming increasingly more difficult to find a meet these days?? I've msgd profiles I'm interested in and pretty much just get ignored! I appreciate I'm not everyone's taste but it's really annoying when folk outline what they're looking for and even though you match it you just get blanked.
Do others find this to be the case or am I just really unlucky haha? Do most folk go to party nights and have the joys of a social experience or are yous doing something different? Genuinely interested as the site isn't much fun these days."
I do sigh at these but then I have to be realistic as there are people and new people who genuinely don't do well or haven't a clue why they cant get a meet.
First of all, you always have to decide why are you here, to swing or the sex or make friends, go to parties etc..
Sex is in abundance on here, the women know it so they can pick the one out of a thousand when they feel like it, so its harder than it used to be to find a meet, even just for a social.
Couple of things:
Online, you need to go over your profile, check its interesting, stimulating, funny, cpl of pictures etc.. and of course enticing, (I haven't looked at yours and please don't bother with mines, its shite and not helpful). You can put a cock pick in your profile but whatever happens, you will definitely be cancelling out more than 60% of women or couples who would be interested in you.
Be in the forums, look at posts and chat in here and always be positive, Try the scots chat room and just have a laugh and chat, the women don't appreciated being hounded in the room.
Outside
Go to clubs and socials, details usually on here and go to parties if offered.
Thats probably the best and basic stuff that needs addressed if it hasn't already
Truly, what you put into fab, you will get out of fab
Wishing you all the best on fab   |
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"I think this site is very clicky"
evidence please.
"...and lots of rude people"
You're clearly encountering the wrong calibre of people.
"...you can fab photos and request friends but receive very sarcastic replies."
Fab'ing photos and sending friend requests has no relevance to sending or receiving messages or replies. |
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By (user no longer on site) 6 weeks ago
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"I think this site is very clicky and lots of rude people you can fab photos and request friends but receive very sarcastic replies ."
Sorry don't take this the wrong way, we all have different views but why try to add someone who isn't a friend, I've never got this. I only ever add friends of people I've met socially or for fun. trying to add someone as a friends whom you've only chatted to could piss them off.
Agree with fab a pic
Fabbing a pic, could do one of two things, you fab because you like the picture or fabbing pics, hoping that the recipient checks and sees your profile. Me, I hardly fab a pic, usually only cause I like a pic.
Cliques, yeha you'll get them in every walk of life but the site is too big for this to have an effect but one thing for sure, women talk to each other so if a guy is a dick, more women find out about it.
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Everything they say is correct but in correct at the same time…
What works is timing and its that simple.
Saturday night or friday night 9/10/11pm folk drink folk meeting up. Chill time away from the family etc thats when you come on and chat socials etc… making plans 3 weeks in advance for a friday end of month is ok for swinging in couples but it “always” gets the ghost for single guys when it comes to the date….
Go to a club, a bar etc it all works the same
“Timing”
You can be a greek god on here 24/7 and not get to play or a dad bod geeky gamer that picks his moment and gets the prize… its timing and “banter /chat” to get you over the line… |
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By (user no longer on site) 6 weeks ago
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"Everything they say is correct but in correct at the same time…
What works is timing and its that simple.
Saturday night or friday night 9/10/11pm folk drink folk meeting up. Chill time away from the family etc thats when you come on and chat socials etc… making plans 3 weeks in advance for a friday end of month is ok for swinging in couples but it “always” gets the ghost for single guys when it comes to the date….
Go to a club, a bar etc it all works the same
“Timing”
You can be a greek god on here 24/7 and not get to play or a dad bod geeky gamer that picks his moment and gets the prize… its timing and “banter /chat” to get you over the line…"
100% agree timing is huge biggy. I'm more into the social side but have been known to enjoy many different types of fun from 1-1 to groups etc.. But you could come home from work late as I have done about 9pm on a Saturday evening and pop on fab and bang, you and someone connects.
I've had social and fun meets from the forums alone and from the chat room and from social when I've least expected it. I am flexible as I'm single and can meet at mines at any time or travel anytime so there's no restrictions for me.
It's just the right time at the right place but as said on posts above, get profile sorted and be seen, forums, chat rooms and clubs and socials and as the saying, "Build it and they will come" 
All the best
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"I think this site is very clicky and lots of rude people you can fab photos and request friends but receive very sarcastic replies ."
Personally I don’t pay attention to who’s fabbed my pictures and will only accept friends request after we’ve chatted and there’s a hope of meeting. Anyone who sends me a friends request without chatting first I think is rude. Why should you have access to more of my content without the manners of a hello  |
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Don't rely on Fab for meets. Be charming and sociable, don't expect instant sex and when you've found other fun people, they aren't off with the next couple on a bed post notching extravaganza.
We were swinging long before t'internet. |
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"Is it just me or is becoming increasingly more difficult to find a meet these days?? I've msgd profiles I'm interested in and pretty much just get ignored! I appreciate I'm not everyone's taste but it's really annoying when folk outline what they're looking for and even though you match it you just get blanked.
Do others find this to be the case or am I just really unlucky haha? Do most folk go to party nights and have the joys of a social experience or are yous doing something different? Genuinely interested as the site isn't much fun these days.
I do sigh at these but then I have to be realistic as there are people and new people who genuinely don't do well or haven't a clue why they cant get a meet.
First of all, you always have to decide why are you here, to swing or the sex or make friends, go to parties etc..
Sex is in abundance on here, the women know it so they can pick the one out of a thousand when they feel like it, so its harder than it used to be to find a meet, even just for a social.
Couple of things:
Online, you need to go over your profile, check its interesting, stimulating, funny, cpl of pictures etc.. and of course enticing, (I haven't looked at yours and please don't bother with mines, its shite and not helpful). You can put a cock pick in your profile but whatever happens, you will definitely be cancelling out more than 60% of women or couples who would be interested in you.
Be in the forums, look at posts and chat in here and always be positive, Try the scots chat room and just have a laugh and chat, the women don't appreciated being hounded in the room.
Outside
Go to clubs and socials, details usually on here and go to parties if offered.
Thats probably the best and basic stuff that needs addressed if it hasn't already
Truly, what you put into fab, you will get out of fab
Wishing you all the best on fab "
Great advice and from a woman’s perspective, if someone has stated specifically what the aren’t or are looking for and you don’t meet that criteria then don’t contact them to persuade them otherwise or chance your arm.
Polite, well mannered and funny messages always get my attention. X |
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"Is it just me or is becoming increasingly more difficult to find a meet these days?? I've msgd profiles I'm interested in and pretty much just get ignored! I appreciate I'm not everyone's taste but it's really annoying when folk outline what they're looking for and even though you match it you just get blanked.
Do others find this to be the case or am I just really unlucky haha? Do most folk go to party nights and have the joys of a social experience or are yous doing something different? Genuinely interested as the site isn't much fun these days."
There are a lot more women only meeting through social events, clubs, or friends of friends now. It's probably a safety thing |
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"Is it just me or is becoming increasingly more difficult to find a meet these days?? I've msgd profiles I'm interested in and pretty much just get ignored! I appreciate I'm not everyone's taste but it's really annoying when folk outline what they're looking for and even though you match it you just get blanked.
Do others find this to be the case or am I just really unlucky haha? Do most folk go to party nights and have the joys of a social experience or are yous doing something different? Genuinely interested as the site isn't much fun these days."
Go to clubs & socials |
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"Is it just me or is becoming increasingly more difficult to find a meet these days?? I've msgd profiles I'm interested in and pretty much just get ignored! I appreciate I'm not everyone's taste but it's really annoying when folk outline what they're looking for and even though you match it you just get blanked.
Do others find this to be the case or am I just really unlucky haha? Do most folk go to party nights and have the joys of a social experience or are yous doing something different? Genuinely interested as the site isn't much fun these days."
Yep exactly the same experience. Match perfectly what they have on their profile, yet deleted .. then you see status updates complaining bitterly about the guys that have mucked them around .. couldn't script it sometimes. Looking for different guys than there profile states ..  |
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"Is it just me or is becoming increasingly more difficult to find a meet these days?? I've msgd profiles I'm interested in and pretty much just get ignored! I appreciate I'm not everyone's taste but it's really annoying when folk outline what they're looking for and even though you match it you just get blanked.
Do others find this to be the case or am I just really unlucky haha? Do most folk go to party nights and have the joys of a social experience or are yous doing something different? Genuinely interested as the site isn't much fun these days.
Yep exactly the same experience. Match perfectly what they have on their profile, yet deleted .. then you see status updates complaining bitterly about the guys that have mucked them around .. couldn't script it sometimes. Looking for different guys than there profile states .. "
But. But. Your profile may not match what they are looking for.
Due to the number of guys women and couples need some sort of way to whittle down the potential meets. This is where attraction comes into play or your initial message.
There will be people on here who will never meet others due to sheer ratios or how they present themselves |
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Unfortunately, for the most part, it’s just numbers, there are far more men than women, women can afford to be, and are, choosy (and why wouldn’t they be). It’s also true what I read here some time ago, middle aged white men are the absolutely bottom of the list when it comes to what is being sought……unfortunately realities. I also suspect there is a lot of online fantasists, have had a few conversations that appear positive on the face of it but ultimately ghost/disappear as a meet looms, or are just looking for the chat but don’t want to admit it.
I’m over looking for the magic formula to this place, I browse, I entertain myself and if something happens great, if not, well it was never meant to be.
I do also agree that the social avents are probably the way to go, unfortunately I’ve never had the pleasure, usually childcare or something gets in the way and I would also prefer to go with someone than alone (and there is the catch 22 lol)
Just my 2 cents worth…..happy fabbing |
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"I think this site is very clicky and lots of rude people you can fab photos and request friends but receive very sarcastic replies ."
Top tip from a couple. Never send a friend request without chatting first and then asking first if it’s ok. It’s a pet hate of ours (and other couples we’ve chattted to) when guys send a friend request without any interaction. We have a ready made response to these when we block them - it’s so rude and smacks of pic collectors! |
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It gets quite tiresome reading how unfair the site is to men due to the female to male ratio , it's not the women's fault there is less of us too the site .. also it's very much swings and roundabouts , yes it's not easy for males but that hardly makes it easier on us females .
Also a major put off is guys moaning about not getting meets rightly or wrongly it puts alot of us off , it's reeks of being desperate.
Alot of guys see this place as being easy pickings and believe it too be a place where women wait around with there breeks at there ankles for them should they choose us .
I do get it's difficult for guys and women are seen as being too fussy , but in an online world where we are meeting strangers we need to be .
As has been said previously you get out of fab what you choose to put into it . If your not making yourself accessible it's gonna make it a whole lot harder to get a meet .
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Rule #1. Be yourself. I am and that's why about 20% of women have blocked me. It leaves the 80% that are perhaps compatible.
#2. Don't take anything or anyone for granted and put the effort in. Bio, pics and messages. I can't remember the last time I messaged first to be honest.
#3. I was always told that to stand any chance of success you must have at least one of the following and the more the better.
1. Looks.
2. Body.
3. Humour.
#4.Do all of the above and you still might not be successful, due to the je nais se quois factor. Accept it.
#5. If online doesn't work, change it up. Still no nibbles, definitely consider socials. I caught my break through a lovely couple.
Word spreads you're not a dick. It spreads quicker if you are.
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"It gets quite tiresome reading how unfair the site is to men due to the female to male ratio , it's not the women's fault there is less of us too the site .. also it's very much swings and roundabouts , yes it's not easy for males but that hardly makes it easier on us females .
Also a major put off is guys moaning about not getting meets rightly or wrongly it puts alot of us off , it's reeks of being desperate.
Alot of guys see this place as being easy pickings and believe it too be a place where women wait around with there breeks at there ankles for them should they choose us .
I do get it's difficult for guys and women are seen as being too fussy , but in an online world where we are meeting strangers we need to be .
As has been said previously you get out of fab what you choose to put into it . If your not making yourself accessible it's gonna make it a whole lot harder to get a meet .
"
I wasn’t moaning just stating facts as they are, it is fundamentally a numbers game, I have a friend on here, usually hides her profile, accidentally had it visible for 3 hours and received 60 messages, I have been on here for a few months and have received none, it’s just how it is.
I can imagine the difficultly for women having to deal with that level of response, you either spend valuable time sifting through to find someone you are interested in or check if the first couple in the queue are suitable and go from there, leaving the other 55 wondering what’s wrong with them, when the reality its probably not very much, they were just unlucky enough to be further done the list, so yes for men it is tough you are at odds with numbers and timing, again not moaning just stating fact and reality of the situation. More choice means less compromise and your wants and needs are met.
Happy fabbing |
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"I think it would help if guys put there ego’s aside and stopped abusing women for no valid reason.
Maybe then a lot more women would be open to chatting."
I know. Also the white knights probably get on their tits as much too. |
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"I think it would help if guys put there ego’s aside and stopped abusing women for no valid reason.
Maybe then a lot more women would be open to chatting.
I know. Also the white knights probably get on their tits as much too."
Having an honest opinion makes you a “white Knight”? 👍 |
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"I think it would help if guys put there ego’s aside and stopped abusing women for no valid reason.
Maybe then a lot more women would be open to chatting."
Agreed, expectation and entitlement have a lot to answer for |
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"
I wasn’t moaning just stating facts as they are, it is fundamentally a numbers game, I have a friend on here, usually hides her profile, accidentally had it visible for 3 hours and received 60 messages, I have been on here for a few months and have received none, it’s just how it is.
"
I didnae say you were , just seems like every other day there's a thread started about a guy not getting any meets and how unfair it is.
It is balanced in the womens favour just saying that doesnae mean we have it easy on here .
Ultimately we all make the choice to be here were not forced in anyway.If its not working for anyone individually then they have that option whether they stay or go( thats not my buisness)
i was only giving a female prespective it comes across desperate and looking for pity and thats no the best way to attract females onsite . |
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"Not sure how I manage but I do 🤷🏻♂️
A mixture of the force and your lightsaber, at a guess. "
Jedi minds tricks would be a little bit of a questionable technique. Certainly morally grey or uncivilised |
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"I think it would help if guys put there ego’s aside and stopped abusing women for no valid reason.
Maybe then a lot more women would be open to chatting.
I know. Also the white knights probably get on their tits as much too."
Just be a genuine man and not a myth from??? Wherever……… |
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Socials, clubs nights, socials and club nights.
Get you face, name and personality out there. Chat to people. Be friendly and whilst you may not get anything on the first few events, once you are comfortable and people know you are a good person, opportunities may present themselves.
Most of my encounters of people from fab have happend because I have chatted to the person or couple on a previous night and we then chatted again etc.
Other encounters happen through a other site that is fetish led. Once again on that, I have gone to local munches and chatted to people.
So to reiterate, socials and club nights seem to work best for me.
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By (user no longer on site) 6 weeks ago
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"i met ladies on here took out for a meal got on great she says meet again x change phone numbers etc ,get home to find wrong number and blocked but hey ho theirs lovely ladies out their 2 "
Sorry please don’t take this as a personal attack as others have done similar but I’m sorry. Is that what your here for on fabswingers, to take ladies out for a meal when you find them on a swinging site or some think sex site.
Even going for a social, never go for a meal, you want to chat to each other not watch them eat.
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"i met ladies on here took out for a meal got on great she says meet again x change phone numbers etc ,get home to find wrong number and blocked but hey ho theirs lovely ladies out their 2 "
•
Next time please ensure that you go 'dutch'. These pilfering vixens and harlots need to be taken down a peg or two. Their purses are tighter than their quims. |
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"i met ladies on here took out for a meal got on great she says meet again x change phone numbers etc ,get home to find wrong number and blocked but hey ho theirs lovely ladies out their 2
•
Next time please ensure that you go 'dutch'. These pilfering vixens and harlots need to be taken down a peg or two. Their purses are tighter than their quims. "
You’re lovely when you’re masterful  |
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"i met ladies on here took out for a meal got on great she says meet again x change phone numbers etc ,get home to find wrong number and blocked but hey ho theirs lovely ladies out their 2 "
More fool you!
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For us
Guys are not an issue
It's timing when suits both people
Then do you all like similar things
Do you like what you see
Do they like what they see
Then there's the trust issues
If you are giving your address
Then you want to be sure they are genuine
So many idiots ruin it for genuine ppl
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By (user no longer on site) 5 weeks ago
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"For us
Guys are not an issue
It's timing when suits both people
Then do you all like similar things
Do you like what you see
Do they like what they see
Then there's the trust issues
If you are giving your address
Then you want to be sure they are genuine
So many idiots ruin it for genuine ppl
"
Nothing else needs a reply except |
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If you're expecting panties to fall off the moment you say hi then you will be disappointed ..
The fun is in the chase .. talk to the people you like . Find common things to talk about .. build a bond ..
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It has been harder to try and chat since covid and it can be frustrating but whoever you may try and contact be polite have some banter and find some common intrests.
I don't send cock pics to anyone and I always ask if I can send a friend request |
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A lot of people are on different group chats these days and meet people that way! Some swingers are in clubs most weekends or at organised group socials to meet people. These are always posted on the forums. I personally would always make more effort with someone who was well verified socially than someone who had been on 4 weeks with 1 veri that was hidden! |
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