FabSwingers.com > Forums > Scotland > Who goes first?
Who goes first?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I’ve always worked on the basis that if I send the first message to someone on here, I would send the face pic first because I’m the one interested in them.
But if they where to send the first message, I’d expect them to send the first face pic.
Does anyone agree that this should be the way? |
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You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.
I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.
It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x |
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"I’ve always worked on the basis that if I send the first message to someone on here, I would send the face pic first because I’m the one interested in them.
But if they where to send the first message, I’d expect them to send the first face pic.
Does anyone agree that this should be the way?"
only send a one when you feel comfortable to do so .
Never expect one to be returned just because you sent one tho as most will wait until they feel comfortable before sending  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I'm asking someone to exchange face pictures then id send first, if they asked me if expect them to send first.
I suppose, like is so often said on the forum, you do what works for you. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If I'm asking someone to exchange face pictures then id send first, if they asked me if expect them to send first.
I suppose, like is so often said on the forum, you do what works for you. "
This is my point.
Now I’ve been blocked because I said no to going first.
Their response was - “We don’t send photos first to single guys!”
So glad that the conversation was stopped short.
These are the kind of people I don’t want to meet!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.
I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.
It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x"
On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.
They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.
I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.
Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't see the point in making a big performance over the swapping of face pics "
You don’t?
Surely you’d want to see someone who’s asked to meet you?
What if there wasn’t an attraction?
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"I don't see the point in making a big performance over the swapping of face pics
You don’t?
Surely you’d want to see someone who’s asked to meet you?
What if there wasn’t an attraction?
"
I manage that without a performance  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I figure a face pic early on is kinda respectful.
When I arrange to meet, and it's a public place, wouldnt it be a little weird having to walk about with my cock out so they know it's me, if that was the first and only pic I'd sent?
I mean, you get put in handcuffs for doing that sort of thing, and get hit with a truncheon if you resist a little...sorry, its been a long day and I started slipping away there... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I message a man first I'll send a face pic. No point him chatting to me if he thinks I look like Shrek and Donkey's love child.
If someone asks "do you have a face pic?" I think they should send first.
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I never send mine first, and will only send if I like the way the chat is going. I don't mind if they don't send their pic right away but I'd need to see it before arranging to meet as I don't do blind date |
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"I never send mine first, and will only send if I like the way the chat is going. I don't mind if they don't send their pic right away but I'd need to see it before arranging to meet as I don't do blind date "
Imagine a blind date, then Sloth from Goonies shows up  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I message a man first I'll send a face pic. No point him chatting to me if he thinks I look like Shrek and Donkey's love child.
If someone asks "do you have a face pic?" I think they should send first.
"
This   |
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By *sm265Woman
over a year ago
Shangri-la |
I'll only send a face pic when I feel comfortable enough to do so, if they choose to send one early in the conversation I am not obliged to reciprocate. If the conversation is going well, and I'm seriously considering a social meet, then I'm happy to swap face pics but up until that point I won't.
If someone pretty much demands a face pic within the first few messages then it tells me they have different priorities than me and the conversation is unlikely to ho any further. |
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By *orl1971Couple
over a year ago
Glasgow |
We hate the pressure of someone exchanging a couple of messages then looking for our pics.
We’ve actually found it’s easier to not exchange face pics and do a ‘blind social’ meet. It’s bizarrely worked well for us and even if you don’t take it to a second meet you generally have a good chat. Plus you don’t have people with face pics of you.
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"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.
I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.
It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x
On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.
They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.
I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.
Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good "
Face pic aside, I'd never meet anyone that has 70 verifications.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.
I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.
It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x
On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.
They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.
I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.
Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good "
If they have that many verifications that makes me wonder if they are selective of who they meet or not….. |
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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago
Paisley |
"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.
I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.
It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x
On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.
They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.
I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.
Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good
Face pic aside, I'd never meet anyone that has 70 verifications.
"
That’s very presumptive of you. I have over 300 but I organise socials and many are from social events. Doesn’t mean I’ve I’ve played with all of them. |
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"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.
I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.
It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x
On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.
They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.
I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.
Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good
If they have that many verifications that makes me wonder if they are selective of who they meet or not….. "
C’mon Jess. You are likely to accumulate 25 verifications off the back of the lunch social you have organised. Not all veris are play/sex based. |
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"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.
I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.
It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x
On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.
They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.
I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.
Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good
If they have that many verifications that makes me wonder if they are selective of who they meet or not….. "
A couple of socials and two/three club visits and you could easily have that many, but hardly played.
It’s amazing how judgemental it is on here |
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I like to wait and get one off the man first ..
If not my type I'll say ta but not for me .
I'll not send a pic .can u imagine being out one night or in asda and person comes up and says hey what was matter with me the. Ect . Knowing my luck ... so I'd rather not be known .also I'd never acknowledge them off the site . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If people send uninvited face pics I don’t send any back regardless of who messaged first "
same...il only swap face pics if iv asked for a face pic to be sent. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.
I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.
It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x
On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.
They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.
I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.
Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good
Face pic aside, I'd never meet anyone that has 70 verifications.
That’s very presumptive of you. I have over 300 but I organise socials and many are from social events. Doesn’t mean I’ve I’ve played with all of them. "
Exactly this .. just because someone has alot of verifications doesn't mean they've played with them all , sociable people tend to have a lot more than others due to the fact they actually met people at socials .. and in any instance there's an old saying if your gonna point your finger at someone make sure your hands are clean , this really shouldn't be the place to try and shame others in what they choose to get up to sexually or otherwise. |
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"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.
I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.
It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x
On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.
They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.
I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.
Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good
Face pic aside, I'd never meet anyone that has 70 verifications.
That’s very presumptive of you. I have over 300 but I organise socials and many are from social events. Doesn’t mean I’ve I’ve played with all of them.
Exactly this .. just because someone has alot of verifications doesn't mean they've played with them all , sociable people tend to have a lot more than others due to the fact they actually met people at socials .. and in any instance there's an old saying if your gonna point your finger at someone make sure your hands are clean , this really shouldn't be the place to try and shame others in what they choose to get up to sexually or otherwise. "
Exactly this  |
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"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.
I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.
It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x
On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.
They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.
I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.
Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good
Face pic aside, I'd never meet anyone that has 70 verifications.
That’s very presumptive of you. I have over 300 but I organise socials and many are from social events. Doesn’t mean I’ve I’ve played with all of them.
Exactly this .. just because someone has alot of verifications doesn't mean they've played with them all , sociable people tend to have a lot more than others due to the fact they actually met people at socials .. and in any instance there's an old saying if your gonna point your finger at someone make sure your hands are clean , this really shouldn't be the place to try and shame others in what they choose to get up to sexually or otherwise. "
Yeh that is one example, the other is when someone has hundreds of verifications detailing the sex they had explicitly in every verification.
Who is shaming? My preference (we are still allowed to have preferences aren't we?) is to be more selective and not get involved with someone that has had half the population of fab hanging out the back of them. There is no shame towards those that have, each to their own, I just prefer otherwise.
Preferences.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If I message a man first I'll send a face pic. No point him chatting to me if he thinks I look like Shrek and Donkey's love child.
If someone asks "do you have a face pic?" I think they should send first.
"
You look stunning |
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