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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's used usually in BDSM scenes when the bottom/submissive wants to stop play, or indicate their close to their limit.
People use different words depending on what they prefer, personally I use yellow to mean slow down and red to mean stop.
This is just my own experience, every d/s dynamic/ scene is different depending on the people involved. |
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Over the past year a " house safeword " has been rolled out across kink clubs in the Midlands 
Safe words have drawbacks though.
Nothing is better than honest communication, be it verbal or non verbal  |
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"It's used usually in BDSM scenes when the bottom/submissive wants to stop play, or indicate their close to their limit.
People use different words depending on what they prefer, personally I use yellow to mean slow down and red to mean stop.
This is just my own experience, every d/s dynamic/ scene is different depending on the people involved."
We only use red though Amber and green would mean the same as yours if S ever needed to use them. He hasn't ever used red yet either. I've stopped play a few times when he's zoned out and is bleeding from head to toe though  
I've let others play with him before and they have never needed it either. He's good to read. Though one person almost stopped it cos he swore once as they were kicking the shit out of him... They asked me and I replied "no that's him getting turned on"!lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's used usually in BDSM scenes when the bottom/submissive wants to stop play, or indicate their close to their limit.
People use different words depending on what they prefer, personally I use yellow to mean slow down and red to mean stop.
This is just my own experience, every d/s dynamic/ scene is different depending on the people involved.
We only use red though Amber and green would mean the same as yours if S ever needed to use them. He hasn't ever used red yet either. I've stopped play a few times when he's zoned out and is bleeding from head to toe though
I've let others play with him before and they have never needed it either. He's good to read. Though one person almost stopped it cos he swore once as they were kicking the shit out of him... They asked me and I replied "no that's him getting turned on"!lol"
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"Red and amber - you can’t use don’t, stop , get off etc
Why not?"
Because these words can be used in jest, or if you are doing certain role plays they maybe used. This can lead to confusion and that is dangerous |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Red and amber - you can’t use don’t, stop , get off etc
Why not?
Because these words can be used in jest, or if you are doing certain role plays they maybe used. This can lead to confusion and that is dangerous"
They're pretty clear and unambiguous though |
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"Red and amber - you can’t use don’t, stop , get off etc
Why not?
Because these words can be used in jest, or if you are doing certain role plays they maybe used. This can lead to confusion and that is dangerous
They're pretty clear and unambiguous though "
It's whatever works best with you and your Dom |
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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
"I struggle to speak in subspace so they're a bit pointless for me. M knows my tells though so know I'm safe "
Subspace is a tricky one, you almost enter in to a type of trance as you full awareness is external and on the submissive, there is little room for a lot of cognitive thought.
Depends on the type of play, however one thing is for the submissive to hold something in her hand and if she drops it, you stop, immediately. |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Red and amber - you can’t use don’t, stop , get off etc
Why not?"
In role play you would expect them to be used as part of the play so you need to distinguish between real life and the play to now what is not consensual, or you could end up upsetting someone or much worse |
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"Red and amber - you can’t use don’t, stop , get off etc
Why not?
In role play you would expect them to be used as part of the play so you need to distinguish between real life and the play to now what is not consensual, or you could end up upsetting someone or much worse "
Red and Amber are the words I was told to use by my first Mistress and I ones I have used ever since.
Only ever used red once when I was blindfolded to a cross.
The previous week the Mistress was asking my thoughts on sounding and telling me how much she enjoyed it but hasn't done it in a long while.
While blindfolded she said this may feel a strange and took hold of my cock, at this stage I was convinced a sound bar was about to go down my japseye and used the safe word.
The Mistress removed the blindfold saying I was no fun to which She showed me a flashlight pussy and laughed saying I would never get to feel inside her toy pussy now |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Red and amber - you can’t use don’t, stop , get off etc
Why not?
In role play you would expect them to be used as part of the play so you need to distinguish between real life and the play to now what is not consensual, or you could end up upsetting someone or much worse
Red and Amber are the words I was told to use by my first Mistress and I ones I have used ever since.
Only ever used red once when I was blindfolded to a cross.
The previous week the Mistress was asking my thoughts on sounding and telling me how much she enjoyed it but hasn't done it in a long while.
While blindfolded she said this may feel a strange and took hold of my cock, at this stage I was convinced a sound bar was about to go down my japseye and used the safe word.
The Mistress removed the blindfold saying I was no fun to which She showed me a flashlight pussy and laughed saying I would never get to feel inside her toy pussy now"
Anything being forced down my japs eye would result in some words, be them safe or not |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I use Red but only with my partner.
We like rough scenes where I want to be able to say No, Stop, Please Don't, or struggle, without the scene ending.
He is the only person I do that with though. Everyone else, the standard words apply. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We use the traffic light system, but red just means back off for a minute...
Dragonfly on the other hand stops everything and I take her to a safe space. All about trust and aftercare in bdsm.
Vic's only safe worded once. |
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"Never needed one. Always said 'no' or 'stop' and expect it to be heard and respected"
Amazes me how grown ups seem incapable of communicating what they want, or don’t want. As you said simple language is sufficient. |
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"Red and amber - you can’t use don’t, stop , get off etc
Why not?
Because these words can be used in jest, or if you are doing certain role plays they maybe used. This can lead to confusion and that is dangerous
They're pretty clear and unambiguous though "
In bdsm they are not... I've been in an integration scene actaully begging them to stop and they didn't listen... Even my safe word didn't work. The only thing they wanted to know was the "secret password" which only one person knew the person who told me it..... I knew that. They knew that I knew that... I eventually told them when they dragged my friend in and started beating her so I would tell them (that was pre planned but I didn't know that) mind fuckery of the highest order. |
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"Yes means yes
No means no
Stop means stop
And go means go.
No need for safe words."
That's not necessarily true, not in BDSM or roleplay where I might be saying stop or "don't do it" within the role but the dom knows that this isn't a real instruction. This is why separate safe words exist |
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By *ensualMan
over a year ago
Sutton |
Rather than "amber" I like the one used by the porn site that concentrates on kink. They replace it with "mercy". Whereas "amber" is neutral and may not mean much. Whereas "mercy" is used as a plea to take it easy and it has a certain resonance. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes means yes
No means no
Stop means stop
And go means go.
No need for safe words.
That's not necessarily true, not in BDSM or roleplay where I might be saying stop or "don't do it" within the role but the dom knows that this isn't a real instruction. This is why separate safe words exist "
Exactly this as I told daddy no at the weekend and he still did it  |
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‘Now far be it for me to criticise your technique which I’m sure is quite satisfactory, nor do I wish to spoil any specific enjoyment which you may derive from thIs particular sexual pursuit that you have presently so earnestly commenced upon, but - and not in any way, shape or form wishing to appear ungrateful or uncivil, nor passing any form of judgement upon your obvious predilection towards this specific act, please, may I entreat you to desist immediately. Thank you.’ |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Red and amber - you can’t use don’t, stop , get off etc
Why not?
Because these words can be used in jest, or if you are doing certain role plays they maybe used. This can lead to confusion and that is dangerous
They're pretty clear and unambiguous though
In bdsm they are not... I've been in an integration scene actaully begging them to stop and they didn't listen... Even my safe word didn't work. The only thing they wanted to know was the "secret password" which only one person knew the person who told me it..... I knew that. They knew that I knew that... I eventually told them when they dragged my friend in and started beating her so I would tell them (that was pre planned but I didn't know that) mind fuckery of the highest order. "
I'd say that all sounds pretty dangerous |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes means yes
No means no
Stop means stop
And go means go.
No need for safe words.
That's not necessarily true, not in BDSM or roleplay where I might be saying stop or "don't do it" within the role but the dom knows that this isn't a real instruction. This is why separate safe words exist
Exactly this as I told daddy no at the weekend and he still did it "
This, no doesn't always mean stop. Safewords are much clearer for those of us into certain kinks. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes means yes
No means no
Stop means stop
And go means go.
No need for safe words."
That just won't work with CNC play. If that's your thing you need safe words or signs, I tissue held in your hand being dropped is one that works when a person is gagged for example. Don't remember having used is before but I can normally read her well and know when to stop or back off. |
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