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Old & Wrinkly clubs
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"I’m in "Is there blankets and watery tea in here | |||
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"I’m in
Is there blankets and watery tea in here "There’s always water in my tea. What else do you make it with?  | |||
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"I’m so in I’m on my way out" Fancy a nice watery tea Doc | |||
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"I’m so in I’m on my way out Fancy a nice watery tea Doc "Will there be biscuits too and a nice tartan blanket?  | |||
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"I’m in
Is there blankets and watery tea in here
There’s always water in my tea. What else do you make it with? "It’s normal Luke warm and weak looking when we get old | |||
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"I’m so in I’m on my way out Fancy a nice watery tea Doc
Will there be biscuits too and a nice tartan blanket? "Oh yes definitely deary...come along, take your teeth out and relax, have a snooze and dribble on your chin | |||
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"I’m in
Is there blankets and watery tea in here
There’s always water in my tea. What else do you make it with?
It’s normal Luke warm and weak looking when we get old "Unlike me who gets cold and weak looking 
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"I’m in
Is there blankets and watery tea in here "Yes and a commode because that tea goes right through me. | |||
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"I'm in "Come sit with Doc and I on the blanket deary | |||
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"Who’s joking this club recently.. when yr blocked from messaging cuz yr to old ? " Yep. Sure am. | |||
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"I'm in "But you’ve not even reached the point of no return yet! | |||
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"I’m in
Is there blankets and watery tea in here
There’s always water in my tea. What else do you make it with?
It’s normal Luke warm and weak looking when we get old "noooooo we both old and take our tea so strong the spoon stands up on its own in it lol  | |||
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"I’m in
Is there blankets and watery tea in here
There’s always water in my tea. What else do you make it with?
It’s normal Luke warm and weak looking when we get old
Unlike me who gets cold and weak looking
"I just widdle myself these days, god help me if I sneeze, my teeth go flying down the road at 100mph  | |||
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"Do they do Horlicks?" Everything is liquid based in this club | |||
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"I’m in" Ey up fella, long time no see | |||
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"I’m so in I’m on my way out Fancy a nice watery tea Doc
Will there be biscuits too and a nice tartan blanket?
Oh yes definitely deary...come along, take your teeth out and relax, have a snooze and dribble on your chin "I’ve already done that. My post prandial nap was essential after chewing on a toasted sandwich for lunch. Fair wipes me out it did. Clearly not soggy enough  | |||
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"Do they do Horlicks? Everything is liquid based in this club" Teeth to be deposited at the door on entry | |||
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"I'm in
But you’ve not even reached the point of no return yet!"How do you know | |||
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"I’m in Ey up fella, long time no see "Oi oi Ace, how you doing? | |||
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"Do they do Horlicks? Everything is liquid based in this club" All liquid ... food, Bodley functions ... the lot | |||
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"I'm in
But you’ve not even reached the point of no return yet!
How do you know "Okay okay multiple point of no return | |||
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"I’m in
Is there blankets and watery tea in here
There’s always water in my tea. What else do you make it with?
It’s normal Luke warm and weak looking when we get old
Unlike me who gets cold and weak looking
I just widdle myself these days, god help me if I sneeze, my teeth go flying down the road at 100mph "If I sneeze my nasal hair whips me into submission and I just lose control of all bodily functions *sighs* | |||
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"I’m so in I’m on my way out Fancy a nice watery tea Doc
Will there be biscuits too and a nice tartan blanket?
Oh yes definitely deary...come along, take your teeth out and relax, have a snooze and dribble on your chin
I’ve already done that. My post prandial nap was essential after chewing on a toasted sandwich for lunch. Fair wipes me out it did. Clearly not soggy enough "Did you start eating it around 12ish and just finished it | |||
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"Who’s joking this club recently.. when yr blocked from messaging cuz yr to old ? " .......PARDON....... | |||
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"Is there a commode?" Commode ... are u at the stage of pissing yrself yet ? I think you’ve sneaked in here under the radar | |||
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"I'm in
But you’ve not even reached the point of no return yet!
How do you know
Okay okay multiple point of no return "Good to see you round these parts again Ryan. Last time I saw you,you were recovering from one of Femme’s status shuffles, after posting a status asking to be shafted up your jacksie by some brute doing a Tarzan swing. | |||
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"I was told I’d aged well and had a lived in face, by Doris in the corner ... then a 21 year nurse said I had face that had been squatted in ... bitch " Awwww She’s dear old Doris, bit deaf though in one eye | |||
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"I'm in
But you’ve not even reached the point of no return yet!
How do you know
Okay okay multiple point of no return
Good to see you round these parts again Ryan. Last time I saw you,you were recovering from one of Femme’s status shuffles, after posting a status asking to be shafted up your jacksie by some brute doing a Tarzan swing." | |||
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"I was told I’d aged well and had a lived in face, by Doris in the corner ... then a 21 year nurse said I had face that had been squatted in ... bitch Awwww She’s dear old Doris, bit deaf though in one eye "She just told me that yr foof is dripping like a fucked fridge | |||
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"Oh my I’ve found a wrinkly club member that likes marmite. Hold me back as I drool down my string vest "All us old folk like marmite, it’s the only thing we can taste these days | |||
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"I'm in
But you’ve not even reached the point of no return yet!
How do you know
Okay okay multiple point of no return
Good to see you round these parts again Ryan. Last time I saw you,you were recovering from one of Femme’s status shuffles, after posting a status asking to be shafted up your jacksie by some brute doing a Tarzan swing."I’m actually still traumatised. Counselling costs have been horrendous | |||
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"Oh my I’ve found a wrinkly club member that likes marmite. Hold me back as I drool down my string vest "Oh Cheeky, you’ve not met Ryan. He was famous for trying to entice women by putting ring doughnuts on his erect willy. Unfortunately they looked so good he ate them himself
He now sticks to Burgers | |||
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"I was told I’d aged well and had a lived in face, by Doris in the corner ... then a 21 year nurse said I had face that had been squatted in ... bitch Awwww She’s dear old Doris, bit deaf though in one eye
She just told me that yr foof is dripping like a fucked fridge "She said what now , I think you misheard her, she said” likes to keep her fudge in the fridge, to keep it cold” | |||
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"Oh my I’ve found a wrinkly club member that likes marmite. Hold me back as I drool down my string vest
All us old folk like marmite, it’s the only thing we can taste these days "Taste? Oh I thought it was for bum massages | |||
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"I'm in
But you’ve not even reached the point of no return yet!
How do you know
Okay okay multiple point of no return
Good to see you round these parts again Ryan. Last time I saw you,you were recovering from one of Femme’s status shuffles, after posting a status asking to be shafted up your jacksie by some brute doing a Tarzan swing.
I’m actually still traumatised. Counselling costs have been horrendous "Terrible trauma - who would have suggested such a status I cannot imagine | |||
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"I was told I’d aged well and had a lived in face, by Doris in the corner ... then a 21 year nurse said I had face that had been squatted in ... bitch Awwww She’s dear old Doris, bit deaf though in one eye
She just told me that yr foof is dripping like a fucked fridge
She said what now , I think you misheard her, she said” likes to keep her fudge in the fridge, to keep it cold” "Thanks hun, my earring isn’t what it use to .. only thing spirt out of my body now is ear wax | |||
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"Oh my I’ve found a wrinkly club member that likes marmite. Hold me back as I drool down my string vest
Oh Cheeky, you’ve not met Ryan. He was famous for trying to entice women by putting ring doughnuts on his erect willy. Unfortunately they looked so good he ate them himself
He now sticks to Burgers "When I unhid my profile yesterday or the day before (I don’t remember now I’m old) I saw that photo and had a little chuckle | |||
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"Get my granny chariot soon "Oooooo ...look everyone a youngster | |||
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"I was told I’d aged well and had a lived in face, by Doris in the corner ... then a 21 year nurse said I had face that had been squatted in ... bitch Awwww She’s dear old Doris, bit deaf though in one eye
She just told me that yr foof is dripping like a fucked fridge
She said what now , I think you misheard her, she said” likes to keep her fudge in the fridge, to keep it cold”
Thanks hun, my earring isn’t what it use to .. only thing spirt out of my body now is ear wax "I’m just hoovering my nose hair | |||
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"Oh my I’ve found a wrinkly club member that likes marmite. Hold me back as I drool down my string vest
Oh Cheeky, you’ve not met Ryan. He was famous for trying to entice women by putting ring doughnuts on his erect willy. Unfortunately they looked so good he ate them himself
He now sticks to Burgers
When I unhid my profile yesterday or the day before (I don’t remember now I’m old) I saw that photo and had a little chuckle "Good times | |||
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"Oh my I’ve found a wrinkly club member that likes marmite. Hold me back as I drool down my string vest
All us old folk like marmite, it’s the only thing we can taste these days
Taste? Oh I thought it was for bum massages "Well you thought wrong deary | |||
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"Oh my I’ve found a wrinkly club member that likes marmite. Hold me back as I drool down my string vest
All us old folk like marmite, it’s the only thing we can taste these days
Taste? Oh I thought it was for bum massages
Well you thought wrong deary "Pfffft | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X" All oldies welcome | |||
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"I'm in
But you’ve not even reached the point of no return yet!
How do you know
Okay okay multiple point of no return
Good to see you round these parts again Ryan. Last time I saw you,you were recovering from one of Femme’s status shuffles, after posting a status asking to be shafted up your jacksie by some brute doing a Tarzan swing.
I’m actually still traumatised. Counselling costs have been horrendous "I still attend therapy after one of Polo's random status shuffles | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X" Hello Kelly dear | |||
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"I'm in
But you’ve not even reached the point of no return yet!
How do you know
Okay okay multiple point of no return
Good to see you round these parts again Ryan. Last time I saw you,you were recovering from one of Femme’s status shuffles, after posting a status asking to be shafted up your jacksie by some brute doing a Tarzan swing.
I’m actually still traumatised. Counselling costs have been horrendous
I still attend therapy after one of Polo's random status shuffles "Does Polo still come on? | |||
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"I'm in
But you’ve not even reached the point of no return yet!
How do you know
Okay okay multiple point of no return
Good to see you round these parts again Ryan. Last time I saw you,you were recovering from one of Femme’s status shuffles, after posting a status asking to be shafted up your jacksie by some brute doing a Tarzan swing.
I’m actually still traumatised. Counselling costs have been horrendous
I still attend therapy after one of Polo's random status shuffles
Does Polo still come on?"No, he’s got s hole in him | |||
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"[teeth Removed by poster at 20/08/19 15:36:11]" | |||
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"[teeth Removed by poster at 20/08/19 15:36:11] "Hahahaha | |||
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"I'm in
But you’ve not even reached the point of no return yet!
How do you know
Okay okay multiple point of no return
Good to see you round these parts again Ryan. Last time I saw you,you were recovering from one of Femme’s status shuffles, after posting a status asking to be shafted up your jacksie by some brute doing a Tarzan swing.
I’m actually still traumatised. Counselling costs have been horrendous
I still attend therapy after one of Polo's random status shuffles
Does Polo still come on?"Not seen her for a few years now | |||
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"I'm in
But you’ve not even reached the point of no return yet!
How do you know
Okay okay multiple point of no return
Good to see you round these parts again Ryan. Last time I saw you,you were recovering from one of Femme’s status shuffles, after posting a status asking to be shafted up your jacksie by some brute doing a Tarzan swing.
I’m actually still traumatised. Counselling costs have been horrendous
I still attend therapy after one of Polo's random status shuffles
Does Polo still come on?
Not seen her for a few years now "Phew, least I can remove my steel underpants | |||
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"How low do your balls have to swing to join. "Can u tuck em in yr socks | |||
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"How low do your balls have to swing to join. "Can you polish wooden floors with them? | |||
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"I'm in
But you’ve not even reached the point of no return yet!
How do you know
Okay okay multiple point of no return
Good to see you round these parts again Ryan. Last time I saw you,you were recovering from one of Femme’s status shuffles, after posting a status asking to be shafted up your jacksie by some brute doing a Tarzan swing.
I’m actually still traumatised. Counselling costs have been horrendous
I still attend therapy after one of Polo's random status shuffles
Does Polo still come on?
Not seen her for a few years now
Phew, least I can remove my steel underpants "Bet they’re rusty now | |||
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"How low do your balls have to swing to join.
Can you polish wooden floors with them?"I expect he can sling them over his back like a haversack | |||
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"How low do your balls have to swing to join.
Can you polish wooden floors with them?
I expect he can sling them over his back like a haversack "Look at link, he as back tits | |||
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"How low do your balls have to swing to join.
Can you polish wooden floors with them?
I expect he can sling them over his back like a haversack "I can teabag from a great height | |||
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"3 more new (old) comers and we can play bingo " Dont rush us.... | |||
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"How low do your balls have to swing to join. "Theres was a guy a few weeks back on a thread. Cant remember his name. Seriously he could tuck them in his bloody socks. True story  | |||
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"I best start jiggling me balls " Do you need an assistant | |||
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"I best start jiggling me balls Do you need an assistant "Who... yes plz, it’s been years since a lovely lady assisted me with my balls  | |||
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"3 more new (old) comers and we can play bingo " 43 down on your knees - not you _moothdick obviously. Unless you’re that way inclined | |||
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"3 more new (old) comers and we can play bingo 43 down on your knees - not you _moothdick obviously. Unless you’re that way inclined" Anything is a bonus at my age ... On its own .... me | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X Hello Kelly dear "hello cheeky x | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome "aww thank you x | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x"Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. | |||
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"I’m in
Is there blankets and watery tea in here
There’s always water in my tea. What else do you make it with?
It’s normal Luke warm and weak looking when we get old
noooooo we both old and take our tea so strong the spoon stands up on its own in it lol "I am in ...... northy we know you like everything strong LOL | |||
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"How low do your balls have to swing to join.
Can you polish wooden floors with them?
I expect he can sling them over his back like a haversack "A Havernutsack | |||
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When the clock struck midnight when I turned 40 I was blocked from loads of profiles.
Now I'm 44 Im Fab Ancient  | |||
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"In
When the clock struck midnight when I turned 40 I was blocked from loads of profiles.
Now I'm 44 Im Fab Ancient "I wouldn’t block u babe | |||
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"In
When the clock struck midnight when I turned 40 I was blocked from loads of profiles.
Now I'm 44 Im Fab Ancient "You still look great though. | |||
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"In
When the clock struck midnight when I turned 40 I was blocked from loads of profiles.
Now I'm 44 Im Fab Ancient
I wouldn’t block u babe "Who said that again | |||
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"How low do your balls have to swing to join.
Can you polish wooden floors with them?
I expect he can sling them over his back like a haversack
A Havernutsack"A squirrel | |||
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"I’m just back from the loo after my last post "Did you make it xx | |||
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"I’m just back from the loo after my last post
Did you make it xx "I had a little dribble | |||
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"I’m just back from the loo after my last post
Did you make it xx
I had a little dribble "I know, I can the wet patch on the back of yr frock ... | |||
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"We both qualify x" Come on in ... take a seat, but not the one in the corner, that’s aurthers ... he’s been caught short | |||
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"No walking in the day room with yr willies our, cuz u forgot to zip up " No way When your are age its aloud | |||
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"No walking in the day room with yr willies our, cuz u forgot to zip up No way When your are age its aloud "Aloud ? Well it don’t get proud anymore | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. "only on a sunday | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday "U lucky devil .. that’s bath night | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday "or Thursday i can't remember its my age you know | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday
U lucky devil .. that’s bath night " | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday
U lucky devil .. that’s bath night "i know but my carer isnt happy | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday
U lucky devil .. that’s bath night i know but my carer isnt happy "Fuck her ... we have to get the smell of wee of us | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday
U lucky devil .. that’s bath night i know but my carer isnt happy
Fuck her ... we have to get the smell of wee of us "i know i mean onve a week what's her problem | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday
U lucky devil .. that’s bath night i know but my carer isnt happy
Fuck her ... we have to get the smell of wee of us i know i mean onve a week what's her problem "It’s young un love, young un’s, got no understanding.. little bastards will be old one day ... the smell of wee on yr clothes .. smells like victory | |||
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"Can anyone else smell piss?" Yr nose is to near yr trousers, young man | |||
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"You know they started to issue viarga to retirement homes? To keep the old guys from rolling out of bed" I rub it on my neck now ... just so I can moan at the carer’s that I have a stiff neck | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday
U lucky devil .. that’s bath night i know but my carer isnt happy
Fuck her ... we have to get the smell of wee of us i know i mean onve a week what's her problem
It’s young un love, young un’s, got no understanding.. little bastards will be old one day ... the smell of wee on yr clothes .. smells like victory "this os true....back in my day we helped the old pfft oh well ... .now wheres my zimma frame gone now | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday
U lucky devil .. that’s bath night i know but my carer isnt happy
Fuck her ... we have to get the smell of wee of us i know i mean onve a week what's her problem
It’s young un love, young un’s, got no understanding.. little bastards will be old one day ... the smell of wee on yr clothes .. smells like victory this os true....back in my day we helped the old pfft oh well ...
.now wheres my zimma frame gone now"U watch u don’t trip over my bag of wee | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday
U lucky devil .. that’s bath night i know but my carer isnt happy
Fuck her ... we have to get the smell of wee of us i know i mean onve a week what's her problem
It’s young un love, young un’s, got no understanding.. little bastards will be old one day ... the smell of wee on yr clothes .. smells like victory this os true....back in my day we helped the old pfft oh well ...
.now wheres my zimma frame gone now
U watch u don’t trip over my bag of wee"ohhhh its yours is it? Thought it was my new perfume | |||
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"Can anyone else smell piss? Yr nose is to near yr trousers, young man " It’s a long time since I’ve been called young. Your not trying to get in my undies are you? | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday
U lucky devil .. that’s bath night i know but my carer isnt happy
Fuck her ... we have to get the smell of wee of us i know i mean onve a week what's her problem
It’s young un love, young un’s, got no understanding.. little bastards will be old one day ... the smell of wee on yr clothes .. smells like victory this os true....back in my day we helped the old pfft oh well ...
.now wheres my zimma frame gone now
U watch u don’t trip over my bag of weeohhhh its yours is it? Thought it was my new perfume"Diabetes piss aroma cologne... mmmmm it reminds me of sex | |||
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"*looks online to order something beige to wear for the STP on Saturday "With Velcro fastening shoes | |||
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"I've forgotten why I came in here "Love Can I help with your zimmer frame? | |||
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"Are u new to the home x" Who are you | |||
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"Are u new to the home x Who are you "Watch where yr shuffling, u silly old moo.. you’ve tried on my wee back | |||
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"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday
U lucky devil .. that’s bath night i know but my carer isnt happy
Fuck her ... we have to get the smell of wee of us i know i mean onve a week what's her problem
It’s young un love, young un’s, got no understanding.. little bastards will be old one day ... the smell of wee on yr clothes .. smells like victory this os true....back in my day we helped the old pfft oh well ...
.now wheres my zimma frame gone now
U watch u don’t trip over my bag of weeohhhh its yours is it? Thought it was my new perfume
Diabetes piss aroma cologne... mmmmm it reminds me of sex "sex whats that? Im too old for all that | |||
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"I’m in "God woman, that body........ You've been blessed | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday
U lucky devil .. that’s bath night i know but my carer isnt happy
Fuck her ... we have to get the smell of wee of us i know i mean onve a week what's her problem
It’s young un love, young un’s, got no understanding.. little bastards will be old one day ... the smell of wee on yr clothes .. smells like victory this os true....back in my day we helped the old pfft oh well ...
.now wheres my zimma frame gone now
U watch u don’t trip over my bag of weeohhhh its yours is it? Thought it was my new perfume
Diabetes piss aroma cologne... mmmmm it reminds me of sex sex whats that? Im too old for all that "Come here I’ll show u sex is .... see the coal man there ... he use to deliver sex of coal to his posh customers | |||
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday
U lucky devil .. that’s bath night i know but my carer isnt happy
Fuck her ... we have to get the smell of wee of us i know i mean onve a week what's her problem
It’s young un love, young un’s, got no understanding.. little bastards will be old one day ... the smell of wee on yr clothes .. smells like victory this os true....back in my day we helped the old pfft oh well ...
.now wheres my zimma frame gone now
U watch u don’t trip over my bag of weeohhhh its yours is it? Thought it was my new perfume
Diabetes piss aroma cologne... mmmmm it reminds me of sex sex whats that? Im too old for all that
Come here I’ll show u sex is .... see the coal man there ... he use to deliver sex of coal to his posh customers "oh not had sex of coal before...but then again im not posh | |||
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"I'm in just because I'm old "U got be senile as well ... and smell of wee and have yr dinner down yr nightie | |||
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Can this old nanny join? X All oldies welcome aww thank you x
Cum and joins us pet... do u smell of wee .. only on a sunday
U lucky devil .. that’s bath night i know but my carer isnt happy
Fuck her ... we have to get the smell of wee of us i know i mean onve a week what's her problem
It’s young un love, young un’s, got no understanding.. little bastards will be old one day ... the smell of wee on yr clothes .. smells like victory this os true....back in my day we helped the old pfft oh well ...
.now wheres my zimma frame gone now
U watch u don’t trip over my bag of weeohhhh its yours is it? Thought it was my new perfume
Diabetes piss aroma cologne... mmmmm it reminds me of sex sex whats that? Im too old for all that
Come here I’ll show u sex is .... see the coal man there ... he use to deliver sex of coal to his posh customers oh not had sex of coal before...but then again im not posh "U are posh .. u have a reenforced wee bag and Nikis loo roll | |||
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"I'm in just because I'm old
U got be senile as well ... and smell of wee and have yr dinner down yr nightie "I don't wear a nightie | |||
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"I'm not old and wrinkly but I am feeling fat, farty and fucked today... "I'd do ya. Just let me catch my breath and I'll be right on it. | |||
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"I'm not old and wrinkly but I am feeling fat, farty and fucked today... "U shouldn’t be having them mood swings at yr age .. ask nursie for some hrt patches .. oh and a coco | |||
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"I’ve just dropped out of an age bracket I think "Come join us .. on the dried up farm .. where the only thing that gets wet now is yr chair | |||
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"I’ve just dropped out of an age bracket I think "As one bracket closes another opens up DC. | |||
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"I’ve tried to explain that I’m rugged and life experienced, but apparently I’m not fooling anyone. I’m in. " All I can see is a Wolverine. Woof! | |||
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"Who’s joking this club recently.. when yr blocked from messaging cuz yr to old ? " I’m too young honey pot.... | |||
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"im old, im in just been asked to role play mum/child by a 34 yr old cos i look like his mum "Well his mum must have impeccable genetics then. | |||
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"im old, im in just been asked to role play mum/child by a 34 yr old cos i look like his mum "Cheeky whipper snappers .. got no respect ... in our day all way had to play with, was ??? What did we play with .. | |||
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