FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > If you dont have anything nice to say, don't say it at all

If you dont have anything nice to say, don't say it at all

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

That was something my mum taught me, but with all these bad tastes in jokes floating around after people's deaths it does make me think..

Is it just expressing 'freedom of speech' even if a comment is meant in malice, or should it just be expected? Do people who make the comments know it will stir for bad reactions and go ahead to purposely ruffle feathers?

Kinda was inspired by the Whitney Houston death, but in general if you dont have anything nice/contructive to say.. why say it at all?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It depends on point of view.

There, there diddums never mind just doesn't do it for me. Constructive is also subjective. You could also trot out "being cruel to be kind".

As for gallows "humour'...one thing we will ALL share is the death of a friend and loved one...I wonder how many will be cracking jokes over the corpse of their loved ones?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Some get off on being nasty it makes them stand out ... bit of a power trip ... you see it alot in mags and on the net and in papers . But i am like you i think why.. some just see it as ferrdom of speech .. if thay can get away with it thay will . No matter if it hurts people .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We live in a society that promotes free speech and as long as it's not libleous or scandleous you can say what you like.

The only other boundaries are whether or not you really care about other people's feelings

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I'd sooner people say something not nice which is honest, than something fake yet nice for the sake of being nice infront of their audience.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I haven't seen any nasty comments about Whitney Houston but then I haven't sought out any comments at all. Doubtless I'll see the news later and read the papers as it all unfolds.

As for people never saying a 'nasty' thing - nastiness is to an extent subjective.

Some people LOVE to be offended. They think it makes them look sweet and nice and gives them the opportunity to appear frail and victim like.

I defend their right to be offended. Let them hurt themselves by being offended at the slightest disagreement.

Eventually they will realise that how they react is largely their choice. If there is any room for growth that is.

I've never said something to hurt others and often bite my tongue but im fucked if i'll say something nice to pacify some psycophantic, emotionally craven , bleeding heart.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I haven't seen any nasty comments about Whitney Houston but then I haven't sought out any comments at all. Doubtless I'll see the news later and read the papers as it all unfolds.

As for people never saying a 'nasty' thing - nastiness is to an extent subjective.

Some people LOVE to be offended. They think it makes them look sweet and nice and gives them the opportunity to appear frail and victim like.

I defend their right to be offended. Let them hurt themselves by being offended at the slightest disagreement.

Eventually they will realise that how they react is largely their choice. If there is any room for growth that is.

I've never said something to hurt others and often bite my tongue but im fucked if i'll say something nice to pacify some psycophantic, emotionally craven , bleeding heart.

Were you biting your tongue there Granny?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Actually yes Sass... i deleted a few ti sentences which I thought might cause offence to those who don't know the difference between opinion and personal attack

or to those who go boo hoo every time someone says something that doesn't back their train of thought.

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By *adchickCouple over a year ago

Cyprus

"I haven't seen any nasty comments about Whitney Houston but then I haven't sought out any comments at all. Doubtless I'll see the news later and read the papers as it all unfolds.

As for people never saying a 'nasty' thing - nastiness is to an extent subjective.

Some people LOVE to be offended. They think it makes them look sweet and nice and gives them the opportunity to appear frail and victim like.

I defend their right to be offended. Let them hurt themselves by being offended at the slightest disagreement.

Eventually they will realise that how they react is largely their choice. If there is any room for growth that is.

I've never said something to hurt others and often bite my tongue but im fucked if i'll say something nice to pacify some psycophantic, emotionally craven , bleeding heart.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

if some people followed this advice they would end up forgetting how to speak

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"I'd sooner people say something not nice which is honest, than something fake yet nice for the sake of being nice infront of their audience."
I have to agree with that Polo..100%

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

There's always sign language evey :P

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman over a year ago

little house on the praire

There is always those that want to be offended. Id sooner someone told me i looked down right ridiculous in something that let me walk round looking like an idiot. I like truth as long as it is truth. Think im the same, i would tell someone how i felt but i wouldnt make stuff up

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

"There's always sign language evey :P"

i have done my stage 1 BSL exam just in case

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple over a year ago

North Cornwall

I have a feeling that a lot say different things in private from how they appear on here but then I'm a cynic perhaps.

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

"I have a feeling that a lot say different things in private from how they appear on here but then I'm a cynic perhaps. "
im the most cynical person i know

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"I have a feeling that a lot say different things in private from how they appear on here but then I'm a cynic perhaps. "

I agree if you mean their public persona is sweet to the nth ......

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple over a year ago

in Lancashire

"That was something my mum taught me, but with all these bad tastes in jokes floating around after people's deaths it does make me think..

Kinda was inspired by the Whitney Houston death, but in general if you dont have anything nice/contructive to say.. why say it at all?"

i may be wrong but have you not said something similar before?

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I think it's a good idea. It works with children when you want peace from their bickering.

I do think it would work better if it had a downer on saying negative or hurtful things rather than an emphasis on everyone being nice.

Trouble is some people don't know the difference between opinion and 'nastiness' . I feel like a child everytime I say that word.... It's like Mummy the nasty girl said mean things to me.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"if some people followed this advice they would end up forgetting how to speak

I once said it to a nasty, miserable bloke I worked with, he didn't speak to me for 2 whole weeks

It was heaven

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'd sooner people say something not nice which is honest, than something fake yet nice for the sake of being nice infront of their audience."

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

"if some people followed this advice they would end up forgetting how to speak

I once said it to a nasty, miserable bloke I worked with, he didn't speak to me for 2 whole weeks

It was heaven

Oh now Fia that's just not nice.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"if some people followed this advice they would end up forgetting how to speak

I once said it to a nasty, miserable bloke I worked with, he didn't speak to me for 2 whole weeks

It was heaven

Oh now Fia that's just not nice."

sorreee graneee

... he was particularly mean spirited

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Well in that case I'll choose not to be offended :-0 I almost blew a gasket you know.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

phew

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I`d be offended and hurt if it were about someone i cared about. i`d rather the perps just kept their mouths shut

otherwise i just see it as bad taste in some cases

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Something might be said that is offensive and even if it was about my loved ones - I would still view that person as offensive without getting offended and riled.

Having said that if someone went too far I know i'd be weighing up if i could lay my hands on something to take them down with but im not too sure that im offended just that I object strongly sometimes to the cruelty of mindless twunts.

Always love the scenes in films where the nice l'il guy bashes the baddy.

Who doesn't.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I missed off a question mark and will have to flagellate for four hours to let people know im sorry and prevent them being offended by it for too long....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You're all lovely

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Oh you just mean that x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hmmm, perhaps rather than expecting individuals to remain silently critical of people or behavioural issues they don't agree with, surely the act of expressing their honest opinion is a social obligation that should be encouraged…….

However, If in doing so, they inadvertently offend the sensitivities of others who choose to hold a differing view-point,,,,

Perhaps those very people who've chosen to be inadvertently offended could then choose to remain stumm ……

hmmmm twas just a thought !!!! eh!!! honest, it twas just a thought!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Hmmm, perhaps rather than expecting individuals to remain silently critical of people or behavioural issues they don't agree with, surely the act of expressing their honest opinion is a social obligation that should be encouraged…….

However, If in doing so, they inadvertently offend the sensitivities of others who choose to hold a differing view-point,,,,

Perhaps those very people who've chosen to be inadvertently offended could then choose to remain stumm ……

hmmmm twas just a thought !!!! eh!!! honest, it twas just a thought!!!

yup me likes this post, i dont think theres anything wrong with critisism, its meant to be constructive

just people who say things like 'your a fat bastard'... those kind of comments i dont feel are necessary.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I have a feeling that a lot say different things in private from how they appear on here but then I'm a cynic perhaps. "

Its more than a feeling if you start talking to others as you find what you say gets back to the person half of the time. Some people don't have the self confidence to say things to others on line never mind face to face. Sadly some stick trying to maintain a persona rather than be true to their selves.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I have a feeling that a lot say different things in private from how they appear on here but then I'm a cynic perhaps.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I have a feeling that a lot say different things in private from how they appear on here but then I'm a cynic perhaps.

I wouldn't quite say that as you can surmise if someone is trying to persuade they are one way and in reality are 2 faced. When someone is naturals bitchy no mater how hard they try it becomes evident over time.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I haven't seen any nasty comments about Whitney Houston but then I haven't sought out any comments at all. Doubtless I'll see the news later and read the papers as it all unfolds.

As for people never saying a 'nasty' thing - nastiness is to an extent subjective.

Some people LOVE to be offended. They think it makes them look sweet and nice and gives them the opportunity to appear frail and victim like.

I defend their right to be offended. Let them hurt themselves by being offended at the slightest disagreement.

Eventually they will realise that how they react is largely their choice. If there is any room for growth that is.

I've never said something to hurt others and often bite my tongue but im fucked if i'll say something nice to pacify some psycophantic, emotionally craven , bleeding heart.

+1 I couldn't have said this any better

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It all depends on the person.

Personally, I try and remain pleasant unless provoked.

We're all intelligent people and we know when we're being nasty, sarcastic or rude. What annoys me is when people who are that way inclined throw a fit when the roles are reversed.

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple over a year ago

North Cornwall

There are some posters who are always nicey nicey with kisses added. I think they are either people pleasers or/and dishonest. Either way they bore me and if they were the only posters I wouldnt bother. Cruelty is a different issue.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well having just connected very briefly with an idiot from Croydon I can say that some people DO mistake niceness for weakness.

Still I do agree if you can't say anything nice then try not to be obnoxious It is neither witty or cute

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well having just connected very briefly with an idiot from Croydon I can say that some people DO mistake niceness for weakness.

Still I do agree if you can't say anything nice then try not to be obnoxious It is neither witty or cute"

Lol! Sounds good to me!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

in general if you dont have anything nice/contructive to say.. why say it at all?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I find it hard to be nasty. I have grown up with a mum who was so bitchy nasty as hell ..... most days it was like walking on eggshells

trying very hard not to upset her . I dont wish to be like it .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"That was something my mum taught me, but with all these bad tastes in jokes floating around after people's deaths it does make me think..

Kinda was inspired by the Whitney Houston death, but in general if you dont have anything nice/contructive to say.. why say it at all?"
I was never a Houston fan, therefore didn't contribute towards that thread..i saw no point, personally.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"There are some posters who are always nicey nicey with kisses added. I think they are either people pleasers or/and dishonest. Either way they bore me and if they were the only posters I wouldnt bother. Cruelty is a different issue. "

You're not alone there.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If I feel strongly about something, then I would say it as diplomatically as possible, whether it is going to be well-received or not.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

And I care less about what others do's and don'ts, and concentrate more on what I can and can't.

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By *phroditeWoman over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Sometimes we say things from a "non-ok" bad frame of mind, anger sadness stress or whatever, and if we had been in a different emotional place perhaps we would not have said it. I look back at things that I have said to people, in person, on forums etc and on reflection I probably would not say again what I said then. If I am in a "non-ok" frame of mind I would not post now, nor would I meet friends but rather wait until I m ina happier place again.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

And there are a few who are always the opposite type posters

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

Yep I must agree.

But... you do have to laugh when you see them posting a "aww bless fluffy fluffy best wishes" type post in reply to someone you now they have blocked and have been slagging off.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Some people have something to Say; Some people just have to say something.

Guess that my overall view of the forums.

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By *phroditeWoman over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Some people have something to Say; Some people just have to say something.

Guess that my overall view of the forums."
Wow, you are deep

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It is really simple...if you don't like the post...don't bother with it...or is it not so much fun?

But why do some people on here feel the need to laugh at or slap down others and qualify their posts by adding " I am qualified ( add your own bit )...just another look at me post but because I am better than you!...imho !-

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I wasnt specifically on about the forums just meant in life in general but yes i can see why it turned out to be reponses mainly talking about forum useage.

End of the day we can all make presumptions on what people are like but unless you know someone in person for some considerable amount of time then i think its unfair to call people false and putting on a 'front'

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I don't.... some people give themselves away more than they realise.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Sometimes we say things from a "non-ok" bad frame of mind, anger sadness stress or whatever, and if we had been in a different emotional place perhaps we would not have said it. I look back at things that I have said to people, in person, on forums etc and on reflection I probably would not say again what I said then. If I am in a "non-ok" frame of mind I would not post now, nor would I meet friends but rather wait until I m ina happier place again."

yeah i think im very much guilty of that too.. ive said some pretty shocking things just to retaliate due to being wound up. Its pathetic really but i've said stuff purely to get back at a person.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It is really simple...if you don't like the post...don't bother with it...or is it not so much fun?

Some people are inwardly very insecure and do that to justify their words not only to others but to convince themselves.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I don't.... some people give themselves away more than they realise."

But your opinion/view of someone is subjective to information that person has given you. It might not be the entire picture so surely you pass judgement on only what you know.

Im not saying its a bad thing by the way

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By *phroditeWoman over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

yeah i think im very much guilty of that too.. ive said some pretty shocking things just to retaliate due to being wound up. Its pathetic really but i've said stuff purely to get back at a person."

Dont beat yourself up - I think most of us have done that at some point or another. Recognising is the first setp anyway

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hmmmm……… surely there can’t be anyone seriously purporting the value of a stagnant mind set, whereby peoples of differing belief should not communicate their thoughts to one another……… or………perhaps never dare to challenge conventional thinking from a fear the world would not be a better place for it….!.….!.

OMG....... spare me from such dullness... if thats what utopia offers.....?

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By *he_original_poloWoman over a year ago

a Primark shoebox in Leicester

I don't.... some people give themselves away more than they realise.

But your opinion/view of someone is subjective to information that person has given you. It might not be the entire picture so surely you pass judgement on only what you know.

Im not saying its a bad thing by the way"

If it is based on information direct from the person it is more objective than subjective.

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By *phroditeWoman over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"Hmmmm……… surely there can’t be anyone seriously purporting the value of a stagnant mind set, whereby peoples of differing belief should not communicate their thoughts to one another……… or………perhaps never dare to challenge conventional thinking from a fear the world would not be a better place for it….!.….!.

OMG....... spare me from such dullness... if thats what utopia offers.....?

"
Hey you mention two very difficult concepts... "thinking" and "challenging"....;-)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hey you mention two very difficult concepts... "thinking" and "challenging"....;-)"

Aye Afro ya could reet there man!!!!

I guess a bit of "thinking and challanging" maybe gets in the way for people who prefer monologue to dialogue….!.

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By *phroditeWoman over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Hey you mention two very difficult concepts... "thinking" and "challenging"....;-)

Aye Afro ya could reet there man!!!!

I guess a bit of "thinking and challanging" maybe gets in the way for people who prefer monologue to dialogue….!.

"
Are we talking straight bilingualism ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hey you mention two very difficult concepts... "thinking" and "challenging"....;-)

Aye Afro ya could reet there man!!!!

I guess a bit of "thinking and challanging" maybe gets in the way for people who prefer monologue to dialogue….!.

Are we talking straight bilingualism ?

Pffffttt..... no good asking me questions about whats straight............

It's been said that I'm so bent ya couldn't throw me away... sheeezzzz

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By *phroditeWoman over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Hey you mention two very difficult concepts... "thinking" and "challenging"....;-)

Aye Afro ya could reet there man!!!!

I guess a bit of "thinking and challanging" maybe gets in the way for people who prefer monologue to dialogue….!.

Are we talking straight bilingualism ?

Pffffttt..... no good asking me questions about whats straight............

It's been said that I'm so bent ya couldn't throw me away... sheeezzzz

"
you re a true boomerang lol...;-)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

people who've chosen to be inadvertently offended could then choose to remain stumm ……

if they choose to be inadvertently offended..... how on earth would that work???? lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"people who've chosen to be inadvertently offended could then choose to remain stumm ……

if they choose to be inadvertently offended..... how on earth would that work???? lol

Erm, IDK,,,,,, perhaps by the process of abstract free-thinking or maybe sumit else altogether….!.

tuh,,,,,,sheeezzzz,,,,,,hey-man, I don’t know the answer to everything !!!!…… pfftt

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"people who've chosen to be inadvertently offended could then choose to remain stumm ……

if they choose to be inadvertently offended..... how on earth would that work???? lol

Erm, IDK,,,,,, perhaps by the process of abstract free-thinking or maybe sumit else altogether….!.

tuh,,,,,,sheeezzzz,,,,,,hey-man, I don’t know the answer to everything !!!!…… pfftt

oh darn, whre's Dr.Who when ya need him

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

End of the day some its easy to be nasty and some its not. Some feel hurt ... it dont make them bad people or low life its just the how thay are as people soft and have feelings . Its not bad in a world like this . Hard is not always the best way .

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple over a year ago

North Cornwall

And there are a few who are always the opposite type posters

Thats true. You refer of course to the drive by critism... when that is all that is ever contributed. Well that can get predictable too. They are usually the biggest users of the

.... just saying

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"End of the day some its easy to be nasty and some its not. Some feel hurt ... it dont make them bad people or low life its just the how thay are as people soft and have feelings . Its not bad in a world like this . Hard is not always the best way ."

it easy to be nasty...but....

Hard is not always the best way but it is always when swinging with a man or two

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple over a year ago

North Cornwall

"Something might be said that is offensive and even if it was about my loved ones - I would still view that person as offensive without getting offended and riled.

Always love the scenes in films where the nice l'il guy bashes the baddy.

Who doesn't. "

*tries not to show

that Granny needs a 'tool' in order to take anyone down*

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

it easy to be nasty...but....

Hard is not always the best way but it is always when swinging with a man or two

"
its not easy to be nasty ,,,,,,,, it playes on the mind . End of the day we have to be true to ourself ... and what go s around come around ... its true , seen it time after time ....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

And there are a few who are always the opposite type posters

Thats true. You refer of course to the drive by critism... when that is all that is ever contributed. Well that can get predictable too. They are usually the biggest users of the

.... just saying

glad only used one of those on this thread lol

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple over a year ago

North Cornwall

And there are a few who are always the opposite type posters

Thats true. You refer of course to the drive by critism... when that is all that is ever contributed. Well that can get predictable too. They are usually the biggest users of the

.... just saying

glad only used one of those on this thread lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I look at it this way ........... no matter what people say ......... if your true say the truth no one can get to you no matter what thay say ......so if thay call you all sorts of names fat ,,, nasty ,,, dont know you ....... who care thay dont know you its cyber land ... tell them to go to hell ,

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

it easy to be nasty...but....

Hard is not always the best way but it is always when swinging with a man or two

its not easy to be nasty ,,,,,,,, it playes on the mind . End of the day we have to be true to ourself ... and what go s around come around ... its true , seen it time after time ...."

sorry , I disagree. it is all too easy to be nasty on here, after all some would never get to face people in real life and then see if their justifications of being nasty would fit with them.

I don't believe in what goes around, prime example was driver I worked with in Canada who picked up survivors of a train crash & told then what goes around!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I look at it this way ........... no matter what people say ......... if your true say the truth no one can get to you no matter what thay say ......so if thay call you all sorts of names fat ,,, nasty ,,, dont know you ....... who care thay dont know you its cyber land ... tell them to go to hell ,"

who care thay dont know you its cyber land ... tell them to go to hell

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

it easy to be nasty...but....

Hard is not always the best way but it is always when swinging with a man or two

its not easy to be nasty ,,,,,,,, it playes on the mind . End of the day we have to be true to ourself ... and what go s around come around ... its true , seen it time after time ....

sorry , I disagree. it is all too easy to be nasty on here, after all some would never get to face people in real life and then see if their justifications of being nasty would fit with them.

I don't believe in what goes around, prime example was driver I worked with in Canada who picked up survivors of a train crash & told then what goes around!

"
well i have seen it over the year thay give it and alot get it back xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

it easy to be nasty...but....

Hard is not always the best way but it is always when swinging with a man or two

its not easy to be nasty ,,,,,,,, it playes on the mind . End of the day we have to be true to ourself ... and what go s around come around ... its true , seen it time after time ....

sorry , I disagree. it is all too easy to be nasty on here, after all some would never get to face people in real life and then see if their justifications of being nasty would fit with them.

I don't believe in what goes around, prime example was driver I worked with in Canada who picked up survivors of a train crash & told then what goes around!

well i have seen it over the year thay give it and alot get it back xx"

I do believe in treating people as I wish to be treated though

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

it easy to be nasty...but....

Hard is not always the best way but it is always when swinging with a man or two

its not easy to be nasty ,,,,,,,, it playes on the mind . End of the day we have to be true to ourself ... and what go s around come around ... its true , seen it time after time ....

sorry , I disagree. it is all too easy to be nasty on here, after all some would never get to face people in real life and then see if their justifications of being nasty would fit with them.

I don't believe in what goes around, prime example was driver I worked with in Canada who picked up survivors of a train crash & told then what goes around!

well i have seen it over the year thay give it and alot get it back xx

I do believe in treating people as I wish to be treated though

"
well just be youself Not letting others get you down xxx be happy ..... and postive and live life for you x With a smile on your face xxxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

it easy to be nasty...but....

Hard is not always the best way but it is always when swinging with a man or two

its not easy to be nasty ,,,,,,,, it playes on the mind . End of the day we have to be true to ourself ... and what go s around come around ... its true , seen it time after time ....

sorry , I disagree. it is all too easy to be nasty on here, after all some would never get to face people in real life and then see if their justifications of being nasty would fit with them.

I don't believe in what goes around, prime example was driver I worked with in Canada who picked up survivors of a train crash & told then what goes around!

well i have seen it over the year thay give it and alot get it back xx

I do believe in treating people as I wish to be treated though

well just be youself Not letting others get you down xxx be happy ..... and postive and live life for you x With a smile on your face xxxx"

thank you...likewise...night night

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By *phroditeWoman over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

it easy to be nasty...but....

Hard is not always the best way but it is always when swinging with a man or two

its not easy to be nasty ,,,,,,,, it playes on the mind . End of the day we have to be true to ourself ... and what go s around come around ... its true , seen it time after time ....

sorry , I disagree. it is all too easy to be nasty on here, after all some would never get to face people in real life and then see if their justifications of being nasty would fit with them.

I don't believe in what goes around, prime example was driver I worked with in Canada who picked up survivors of a train crash & told then what goes around!

well i have seen it over the year thay give it and alot get it back xx

I do believe in treating people as I wish to be treated though

well just be youself Not letting others get you down xxx be happy ..... and postive and live life for you x With a smile on your face xxxx"

I believe in treating everybody with respect - unless they prove not to deserve it. I would avoid confrontation as a waste of my energy, I would rather ignore.

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple over a year ago

North Cornwall

Well OP I was taught the same as you.... and think most of the time I do manage it. Its not difficult really. The only time I dont is if my wit gets the better of me. I have an over developed sense of humour Im afraid. Sometimes its out of me gob before I have a chance to think.... no... inside head voice only! Having said that, I would never deliberately upset anyone and would immediately apologise if I had. Rare occurance though (apart from oh of course... all bets are off there

- he likes a challenge

)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

believe in treating everybody with respect - unless they prove not to deserve it. I would avoid confrontation as a waste of my energy, I would rather ignore.

yes ignore its the best way alot of the time xx and do your own thing not letting others get to you a waste of energy ..be true to you xxxx and smile xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'd sooner people say something not nice which is honest, than something fake yet nice for the sake of being nice infront of their audience."

Here here....too many false personas. Too many upright people in this world too. If someone wishes to make a joke out of death or misfortune of a celebrity it is their right. If someone robbed your house or hurt your family, would you remain silent or would you have a few 'not nice' words to say? It's all relative...let them without sin cast the first stone. Self righteousness is frowned upon more than a joke over some celebrity demise in our eyes.

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

I just wish that people would practise what they preach, many will say one thing but then do another, it makes me smile so its all good fun, there will always be "bad taste" jokes nowt to stop them, and why should there be, some i find amusing, some i dont....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I just wish that people would practise what they preach, many will say one thing but then do another, it makes me smile so its all good fun, there will always be "bad taste" jokes nowt to stop them, and why should there be, some i find amusing, some i dont....

"
belive me i do practise what they preach ...and i am ture to myself .... and the truth is everything to me ,

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

People say things here for effect, they don’t practice them but they are well aware that it will gain favour or acceptability to say certain things. Behind the curtain they do something totally different. Its the way the world works for some from politicians to people using forums. People are wise to these practices in the main though or I like to think they are.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"
no people see the truth x and you cant put things in there heads that are not there .

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By *phroditeWoman over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

belive me i do practise what they preach ...and i am ture to myself .... and the truth is everything to me ,"
I agree with you and

I think sometimes it is more about perception. Think about 5 people watching an accident, they are asked to give an account of what happened to the police. Each telling the truth, the police will stull end up with variations and 5 different accounts. Its about human perception, which is and always will be subjective.

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

belive me i do practise what they preach ...and i am ture to myself .... and the truth is everything to me ,"
i never said you werent

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

belive me i do practise what they preach ...and i am ture to myself .... and the truth is everything to me ,i never said you werent

"
when people call others names out of the blue like fat and things to hurt , Its not nice not amusing its hurtfull ,

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

no people see the truth x and you cant put things in there heads that are not there . "
It doesn't stop them from saying one thing publicly and another in private though.

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

[Removed by poster at 12/02/12 20:13:32]

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

belive me i do practise what they preach ...and i am ture to myself .... and the truth is everything to me ,i never said you werent

when people call others names out of the blue like fat and things to hurt , Its not nice not amusing its hurtfull ,"
You keep on saying this jo (the fat reference) im just wondering what you mean?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

no people see the truth x and you cant put things in there heads that are not there . It doesn't stop them from saying one thing publicly and another in private though.

"
, if people call you names say things not true you have to know youself and not go down to there level and be positive , or it will get to you .. You see what we think about ourselfves becomes truth for us.

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple over a year ago

North Cornwall

I have received messages agreeing with stuff I have said on the Forums but saying that they didnt want to say on the open forum. I feel sorry for them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

belive me i do practise what they preach ...and i am ture to myself .... and the truth is everything to me ,i never said you werent

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By *leasing_to_the_thighsMan over a year ago

Cheshire

in my opinion anything is fair game in comedy frankie boyle for exammple some say he goes to far but i think he is hilarious. the best way to put it is if u dont like it dont listen

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By *phroditeWoman over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

" if people call you names say things not true you have to know youself and not go down to there level and be positive , or it will get to you .. You see what we think about ourselfves becomes truth for us."

Sometimes banter can upset because we take things personal when perhaps they werent meant to be offensive. I agree with you, it is best to ignore comments that upset you. :-

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

no people see the truth x and you cant put things in there heads that are not there . It doesn't stop them from saying one thing publicly and another in private though.

, if people call you names say things not true you have to know youself and not go down to there level and be positive , or it will get to you .. You see what we think about ourselfves becomes truth for us."

I don't know about that as I let it drift over my head. People can call me what they like to my face and its an opinion. But with when they say nice things to my face and then go and say other things behind my back I don't particularly like that. I am in favour of freedom of speech as long as its not slander and its open.

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By *phroditeWoman over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

"well i have had crap years so i stand for the under Dog i was a size 20 and would get called all sorts ... now a 12/14 and alot comes from year of this ,"
You look a beautiful woman - and if you are well, have soembody to love you - then thats all that matters!xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sometimes banter can upset because we take things personal when perhaps they werent meant to be offensive. I agree with you, it is best to ignore comments that upset you. :-

"
yes ingnore ,,,, or its like a sore in your side that keep hurting x

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By *adchickCouple over a year ago

Cyprus

[Removed by poster at 12/02/12 20:27:08]

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

belive me i do practise what they preach ...and i am ture to myself .... and the truth is everything to me ,i never said you werent

when people call others names out of the blue like fat and things to hurt , Its not nice not amusing its hurtfull ,You keep on saying this jo (the fat reference) im just wondering what you mean? well i have had crap years so i stand for the under Dog i was a size 20 and would get called all sorts ... now a 12/14 and alot comes from year of this ,"
well if you have lost that much weight in a year more power to you, its not an easy thing to achieve, but irrespective of that lots of stuff like doc said goes on in private, i have had stuff said about me, but here i am still smiling

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"well i have had crap years so i stand for the under Dog i was a size 20 and would get called all sorts ... now a 12/14 and alot comes from year of this ,You look a beautiful woman - and if you are well, have soembody to love you - then thats all that matters!xx"
yes i know but some things never go away .. xx

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By *adchickCouple over a year ago

Cyprus

"It doesn't stop them from saying one thing publicly and another in private though.

Ooohh that does boil my piss.

I've seen it on here.

All nicey nicey, vomit inducing cuddlyness when hiding behind a computer screen and the vile that spill out of their mouths in public, when they think no one of importance is listening, is maddening.

If I don't like someone, I'll saying it...... on here, or to their face, but I won't put them down...... however, I will make my feelings known when they spout utter shite and gooeyness just to get their own way...... double standards and two facedness is enough to get anyone to bite their tongue

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It doesn't stop them from saying one thing publicly and another in private though.

Ooohh that does boil my piss.

I've seen it on here.

All nicey nicey, vomit inducing cuddlyness when hiding behind a computer screen and the vile that spill out of their mouths in public, when they think no one of importance is listening, is maddening.

Its where the term silver tongue comes from. Politicians are amongst the worst. Its a matter of maintaining a persona and trying to make people see you in one way even if you are totally different in reality. David Cameron is a classic example and it fools some people but less and less as people become accustomed to it.

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By *phroditeWoman over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It doesn't stop them from saying one thing publicly and another in private though.

Ooohh that does boil my piss.

I've seen it on here.

All nicey nicey, vomit inducing cuddlyness when hiding behind a computer screen and the vile that spill out of their mouths in public, when they think no one of importance is listening, is maddening.

"
some have no clue thay just run with the group to keep safe ,, no matter if true or not .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It doesn't stop them from saying one thing publicly and another in private though.

Ooohh that does boil my piss.

I've seen it on here.

All nicey nicey, vomit inducing cuddlyness when hiding behind a computer screen and the vile that spill out of their mouths in public, when they think no one of importance is listening, is maddening.

some have no clue thay just run with the group to keep safe ,, no matter if true or not . "

I doubt it most politicians are well aware of how it works and what's going on and they relish it.

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By *ittlemorespiceCouple over a year ago

North Cornwall

People say things on swinging sites for all sorts of reasons. I take it you dont mean on the Forums as personal attacks are rightly not allowed. If by pm Im guessing someone with sourgrapes for whatever reason. As you said earlier, why let it get to you. If people say insulting nasty comments it says more about them than you. Cant think why you would allow it space in your head. All sorts of nutters online! (I should know

)

Bullys are not happy people. Stands to reason.

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Wow so much bitchiness on a thread to discuss being nice

You can see who likes who and who is talking about who, so do us all a favour and keep the bitchy posts about the people you have had a previous spat with away from the forums as it is makes very unpleasant reading.

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