Ok....so Ming The Merciless has just targeted earth for destruction and we’re all bloody well doomed!
Luckily however, I, Dr Hans Zarkov have built a rocket ship out of some items I found laying around in my garden shed, which just has room enough to transport myself and one other person into space in order to avoid certain death (we’ll bugger off to Mars or something - I haven’t planned that far ahead yet)
Anyhoo, state why I should choose you over the billions of other humans on the planet.
Do you have any special skills I could make use of? For instance, are you an American Football Quarterback of any note? |
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Yes. Take me because of my amazing powers....
1. I can adjust your vision so that you see me as you want to see me... luscious, lithe and lascivious.
2. I turn any element into fresh air.
3. I turn all urine into any liquid you desire.
4. I can make Mars habitable.
5. I can also make Martians appear fuckable and edible..... |
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"Nah, I’m quite happy to be zapped to be honest. I’ve had a good enough innings! "
Fear not good sir - I have just managed to locate Ming’s homeworld on my scanner and I’ve plotted the coordinates to travel to; If I can just procure someone’s services, we may yet manage to put an end to his nefarious plans and save every one of us - every man every woman, every child, everybody flashhhh!!!! |
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"Yes. Take me because of my amazing powers....
1. I can adjust your vision so that you see me as you want to see me... luscious, lithe and lascivious.
2. I turn any element into fresh air.
3. I turn all urine into any liquid you desire.
4. I can make Mars habitable.
5. I can also make Martians appear fuckable and edible..... "
Now that’s what I call skills! Jump aboard m’lady - I’m bursting for a pee; Can you make me an expressio from it? |
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"Yes. Take me because of my amazing powers....
1. I can adjust your vision so that you see me as you want to see me... luscious, lithe and lascivious.
2. I turn any element into fresh air.
3. I turn all urine into any liquid you desire.
4. I can make Mars habitable.
5. I can also make Martians appear fuckable and edible.....
Now that’s what I call skills! Jump aboard m’lady - I’m bursting for a pee; Can you make me an expressio from it? "
absobloodypercolatinglylootley! |
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