FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Real Names
Real Names
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I've noticed recently that people seem to be using others' real names when posting about other users.
The swinging world is fantasy and removed from real life to me. I never refer to anyone by their real name, even if they have it on their profile. When I've met people in the flesh, either at socials or for play meets, they are always referred to by their username.
Do you prefer to use others' real names, even when posting on a public forum, or do you like the mystery of the username. Could it be a lack of discretion to bandy about peoples names, especially when the real name doesn't appear on the public profile, or do you feel that to abandon the username signifies a deeper intimacy / friendship with that person. If a user posts their real name on the forum, do you feel that allows everyone to do the same?
I prefer to live in fantasyland here, I don't particularly want or need to know real names
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Doesn't bother me seeing as how my first single profile was justdeb the OH however prefers to just let people know when we meet his name. Wouldn't tell people surname tho |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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using my real name is fine by me, tho bussy is cool too (just not keen on the wanker )
if referring to people in the forums, i tend to use their profile name but when talking in private i generally use the other persons real name |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Some people prefer to be known as something else other than the username and often sign every post as that. If that's what is indicated I will use that. I always refer to one certain lady by the name she signs her posts by.
But for me I like the silliness of a username. Its great calling people by names such as spunky or tickle. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I only use real names when the real names are us on the profile for all to see
And would never use a real name without knowing it was ok to do so
Both Wendy and I dont mind our real names being used in the forums for instance because they are stated on our profiles
But i use usernames mostly xx  |
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doesnt matter to me in the slightest. but no matter how well i know someone i will only use their real name if it appears elsewhere, but i usually have my own nickname for them anyway. but there are some that refer to everyone by their first name like its trying to show how well they know everyone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
There are some people that ill always call by their username or some version of it,you get so used to it in here it sort of stays the same if you meet in real life,I then find it hard to think of them as anything else  |
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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago
In a crisp poke on the A814 |
If meeting socially I would use real names....
Not calling anyone "Tit wanker" or "fill my cumbucket" in a crowded bar!!! LOL
Mind you...IF they had user names like that i wouldnt be meeting them  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Real names and people call me game and flirty its find ... I know a young man here who go on a made up name he told me his real name but loads he dont and some find out the truth and get so upset with him . Thay Feel he has lied to them.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't mind using my real first name, all this idea of using pseudonyms is too confusing and hard to remember, for example, John is really Mark and Mark is really John 
Would never use my surname though and not all the close friends I have made know that |
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By *andKCouple
over a year ago
Norfolk |
some know our real nnames, some don't and a very few do know our surname all a matter of trust really.
As for using our real names in the forum, prefer it if they aren't but wouldn't throw a hissy fit if they were. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"doesnt matter to me in the slightest. but no matter how well i know someone i will only use their real name if it appears elsewhere, but i usually have my own nickname for them anyway. but there are some that refer to everyone by their first name like its trying to show how well they know everyone. "
how right you are.
I do think its indiscreet to refer to someones real name on a forum where it is not written on the profile.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn't dream of using someone's real name on the forums, only in pms. My name is unusual so I wouldn't want it used either, so only a small number of people know it. If my name was Valarie I wouldn't care.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't dream of using someone's real name on the forums, only in pms. My name is unusual so I wouldn't want it used either, so only a small number of people know it. If my name was Valarie I wouldn't care.
"
Dont worry Sister Josephine, I wont let on... Er... Doh!!! 
Ps: I only use names people use in forum...;-) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I started using the name 'Fia' about 5 years ago, I wanted a name that would be 'usable' both on and off t'interweb. I like the name and like people to use it.
Some stranger messaged me here a while back calling me 'Fiona' (not my name) both his assumption and his attempt at familiarity ryled me much more than it probably should've lol!  |
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"doesnt matter to me in the slightest. but no matter how well i know someone i will only use their real name if it appears elsewhere, but i usually have my own nickname for them anyway. but there are some that refer to everyone by their first name like its trying to show how well they know everyone.
how right you are.
I do think its indiscreet to refer to someones real name on a forum where it is not written on the profile.
"
pretty much my view...though some, like me ,have a name that has become real. i answer to jem as much as kaz, and i think many assume it is my name
There is an aspect of the use of real names i dont like though, sometimes i think it hints at exclusivity.In chat or forum i think it must be quite offputting for newbies to see "the inner circle" using each others real names. i understand this is not deliberate...but i think it is more welcoming if everyone sticks to user names.
Sometimes a man i have never met comes into chat and refers to me as kaz...99 times out of a hundred it is because he is trying to imply intimacy.
So i tend to prefer user names. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I prefer to be called Emily, but when I meet someone I'll tell them my real name if I trust them. I find it odd being called Emily in real life, but if someone leaves a verification and knows my real name, I'll tell them to call me Emily. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Doesn't bother me seeing as how my first single profile was justdeb the OH however prefers to just let people know when we meet his name. Wouldn't tell people surname tho "
Does that include Smith, Jones, Singh and Patel |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"most of you lot call me Scottish Bint or Faaaaannnnnaaaaayyyyy anyway, so it doesn't really matter what other name(s) I may give myself "
My predictive text cant cope with ENUNC...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Most people in swingland address us as Jack and Kate even though we always tell them our real names if we have agreed to meet them.
I suppose because we have chosen "ordinary" names as aliases they are more believable.
Most say that Jack and Kate suit us just as well as our real names which go a long way to making our alter ego's as real and beliveable as possible.
I was going to call myself "Fucknuts McDougall" but thought better of it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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".........I was going to call myself "Fucknuts McDougall" but thought better of it"
that was probably wise.....the real Fucknuts McD might have been upset |
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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago
North of The Wall - youll need your vest |
Most people Ive met from the forums always call me Jez and Im so used to it now that Im more likely to answer to that than I am my real name if Im with people from here |
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it says on my profile not to call me kaz or kazza i fucking detest them and have never answered to them in my life. its amazing how many people think its funny to call you it after seeing it on my profile. i just instant block |
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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago
Cyprus |
My real name is not Maddie........ as most people think.
But it's what I get called. In fact, the only people who call me by my real name are my kids, parents and Jason.
Maddie is used and it's stuck...... I don't mind, I also don't mind if anyone calls me by my real name |
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We wouldn't use anyone's real names on the forums unless they had advised ok or already do and we expect the same back.
We do give our real names out to people we actually meet though as we feels thats omly right but if people don't want to give us theirs that's fine |
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"My real name is not Maddie........ as most people think.
But it's what I get called. In fact, the only people who call me by my real name are my kids, parents and Jason.
Maddie is used and it's stuck...... I don't mind, I also don't mind if anyone calls me by my real name"
Bit like jem for me...kev gets confused though... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've noticed recently that people seem to be using others' real names when posting about other users.
The swinging world is fantasy and removed from real life to me. I never refer to anyone by their real name, even if they have it on their profile. When I've met people in the flesh, either at socials or for play meets, they are always referred to by their username.
Do you prefer to use others' real names, even when posting on a public forum, or do you like the mystery of the username. Could it be a lack of discretion to bandy about peoples names, especially when the real name doesn't appear on the public profile, or do you feel that to abandon the username signifies a deeper intimacy / friendship with that person. If a user posts their real name on the forum, do you feel that allows everyone to do the same?
I prefer to live in fantasyland here, I don't particularly want or need to know real names
"
for me the internet is for user names and real life is for real meets
I never use anyones real name on here or the chat rooms as i respect they may not want everyone knowing their names, but in real life i use their real names and expect the same in return, theres nothing that ticks me off more than being in the chat room and someone i have met putting my name in the room, fastest way to not get a re meet lol |
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I don't like people using my real name in a club never mind on a forum for all and sundry to read.... come to think of it, I tend to avoid tell people my real name if they are the sort who just can't help but use people's real names on the forum.... I don't see the need for it. Even in PM's and private conversations I will refer to people by their username. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If meeting socially I would use real names....
Not calling anyone "Tit wanker" or "fill my cumbucket" in a crowded bar!!! LOL
Mind you...IF they had user names like that i wouldnt be meeting them "
Ha brilliant! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My real name is not Maddie........ as most people think.
But it's what I get called. In fact, the only people who call me by my real name are my kids, parents and Jason.
Maddie is used and it's stuck...... I don't mind, I also don't mind if anyone calls me by my real name"
On my profile I have Miss V. My staff, colleagues and friends all call me Miss V as well as my sub playmates. My ex mother-in-law called me Miss V on Christmas day.
The only ones that deviate are my ex in-laws who call me Sister V. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would not use someones real name I simply see it as indiscreet.
At times when people on the forums use someones real name it seems completely unnecessary, I sometimes see it as an attempt to show 'intimacy', or a way of broadcasting that they know someone.
If a person chooses to share their real name with me on here, I see it as being given with a degree of trust. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"If meeting socially I would use real names....
Not calling anyone "Tit wanker" or "fill my cumbucket" in a crowded bar!!! LOL
Mind you...IF they had user names like that i wouldnt be meeting them
Ha brilliant! "
See I would call someone by the name of pussylover or spunktaster in public or at a social. They are the ones that chose to have a sexually explicit name, not me, and therefore they are the ones that will have to live with it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We only use are middle names as on our old profile we made mistake using our proper names as we got found out by somebody who knew us and we then got blackmailed from some member on here witch cost Louise her job 2 years ago when we lived in Liverpool so my advise is don’t use your real name |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Real names and people call me game and flirty its find ... I know a young man here who go on a made up name he told me his real name but loads he dont and some find out the truth and get so upset with him . Thay Feel he has lied to them. "
That sounds familiar! We used to meet with a guy who we met many times over the space of a year or more. He came to our home many times and even slept over. He came from a town about 70 miles from. Mr notts trusted him enough to come and pick me up once and take me out
alone. Then after all that we found out the name he used on his profile - the same name he carried on using, was not in fact his real name. Made us feel rather uncomfortable after we had been so up front with him. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Real names and people call me game and flirty its find ... I know a young man here who go on a made up name he told me his real name but loads he dont and some find out the truth and get so upset with him . Thay Feel he has lied to them.
That sounds familiar! We used to meet with a guy who we met many times over the space of a year or more. He came to our home many times and even slept over. He came from a town about 70 miles from. Mr notts trusted him enough to come and pick me up once and take me out
alone. Then after all that we found out the name he used on his profile - the same name he carried on using, was not in fact his real name. Made us feel rather uncomfortable after we had been so up front with him. "
well thay felt hurt as both new him and really thay did not ..... and the trust thing had gone after that .. both got very up-set about it all. |
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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago
Cyprus |
This is a swinging site......
Not a dating site.
Why does anyone need to know what someone elses 'real' name is.
Aren't we all here for NSA sex and frivolity?
Why does it really matter what someone's real name is unless you are in a 'relationship' with them? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is a swinging site......
Not a dating site.
Why does anyone need to know what someone elses 'real' name is.
Aren't we all here for NSA sex and frivolity?
Why does it really matter what someone's real name is unless you are in a 'relationship' with them?"
Not everyone feel like that. Some see letting a person into there life into there bed as a very Big deal ... Myself i really dont care if its made up name , Just makes me smile when thay tell me the truth and i have been screaming fu-k-me steve and its really Tim , lol |
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"This is a swinging site......
Not a dating site.
Why does anyone need to know what someone elses 'real' name is.
Aren't we all here for NSA sex and frivolity?
Why does it really matter what someone's real name is unless you are in a 'relationship' with them? Not everyone feel like that. Some see letting a person into there life into there bed as a very Big deal ... Myself i really dont care if its made up name , Just makes me smile when thay tell me the truth and i have been screaming fu-k-me steve and its really Tim , lol "
But you say it so convincingly.
regards
Tim
x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is a swinging site......
Not a dating site.
Why does anyone need to know what someone elses 'real' name is.
Aren't we all here for NSA sex and frivolity?
Why does it really matter what someone's real name is unless you are in a 'relationship' with them? Not everyone feel like that. Some see letting a person into there life into there bed as a very Big deal ... Myself i really dont care if its made up name , Just makes me smile when thay tell me the truth and i have been screaming fu-k-me steve and its really Tim , lol
But you say it so convincingly.
regards
Tim
x"
lol Tim you bad Boy .. is it not john even steve .. I cant keep up with you . |
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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago
Cyprus |
"This is a swinging site......
Not a dating site.
Why does anyone need to know what someone elses 'real' name is.
Aren't we all here for NSA sex and frivolity?
Why does it really matter what someone's real name is unless you are in a 'relationship' with them? Not everyone feel like that. Some see letting a person into there life into there bed as a very Big deal ... Myself i really dont care if its made up name , Just makes me smile when thay tell me the truth and i have been screaming fu-k-me steve and its really Tim , lol
But you say it so convincingly.
regards
Tim
x"
You mean your real name isn't Mushy?
I'm heartbroken
Disgusted
The trust has gone
There's no honesty any more
etc. etc.
Sob, sob, sob  |
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"This is a swinging site......
Not a dating site.
Why does anyone need to know what someone elses 'real' name is.
Aren't we all here for NSA sex and frivolity?
Why does it really matter what someone's real name is unless you are in a 'relationship' with them? Not everyone feel like that. Some see letting a person into there life into there bed as a very Big deal ... Myself i really dont care if its made up name , Just makes me smile when thay tell me the truth and i have been screaming fu-k-me steve and its really Tim , lol
But you say it so convincingly.
regards
Tim
x
You mean your real name isn't Mushy?
I'm heartbroken
Disgusted
The trust has gone
There's no honesty any more
etc. etc.
Sob, sob, sob "
I'll get over it. |
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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago
Cyprus |
"This is a swinging site......
Not a dating site.
Why does anyone need to know what someone elses 'real' name is.
Aren't we all here for NSA sex and frivolity?
Why does it really matter what someone's real name is unless you are in a 'relationship' with them? Not everyone feel like that. Some see letting a person into there life into there bed as a very Big deal ... Myself i really dont care if its made up name , Just makes me smile when thay tell me the truth and i have been screaming fu-k-me steve and its really Tim , lol
But you say it so convincingly.
regards
Tim
x
You mean your real name isn't Mushy?
I'm heartbroken
Disgusted
The trust has gone
There's no honesty any more
etc. etc.
Sob, sob, sob
I'll get over it. "
Bastard !!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Jesuz.......... if someone got upset because they assumed my name was Maddie and then found out it wasn't.......
I'd be off like a sprinter out of blocks.... before they boiled my bunny"
I guess it's because he spent quite a bit of time with us in our own home over such a long time. It seemed weired to us. We are on here for NSA fun not dating lol hmmm and Im definately not into bunny boiling
We didn't like the situation and bid him farewell.....or tried to..... He got the message eventually  |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"This is a swinging site......
Not a dating site.
Why does anyone need to know what someone elses 'real' name is.
Aren't we all here for NSA sex and frivolity?
Why does it really matter what someone's real name is unless you are in a 'relationship' with them?"
Swinging site or dating site, doesn't really matter, if someone can't tell me what their real name is then I do think there is a problem...
I'm not asking for a date of birth or national insurance number for gods sake, but sheesh I don't think telling someone your first name is a big deal! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's not the made up names that bother me, its the other made up things. One meet must have deducted a decade & a half from his age, and another described his build as 'average', yes, for Fat Club! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes foxy minx that's where we're coming from. If we meet folks out or at clubs I'm not bothered, but to have someone frequently visit our home and not be able to be up front was frankly..odd. Tbh that was further enhanced from the abuse we got after we told him we didn't wish to meet him anymore, so we'll stick to our policy as best we can anyway. |
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if i meet someone then they will know my name .even face to face at a social id introduce myself by my real name . but I choose when and WHO i use my real name with . not for anyone else to tell others or use in forum .i certainly wouldnt do it to anyone else ,just a matter of respect for that persons privacy x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I think its odd people demanding to know personal information from strangers they meet over the internet. If people can't accept or respect the need for privacy and have an expectation to know personal information then they would not be people I would want to meet. To me discretion is important within the swinging world.
I wouldn't care if I had been meeting a guy for 10 years and didn't know his real name. Call himself Peter Pan for all I care. As long as he remained respectful, entertaining and fun then that is what is important to me, not than he told me his name was John but it was really Dave. |
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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago
Cyprus |
"I think its odd people demanding to know personal information from strangers they meet over the internet. If people can't accept or respect the need for privacy and have an expectation to know personal information then they would not be people I would want to meet. To me discretion is important within the swinging world.
I wouldn't care if I had been meeting a guy for 10 years and didn't know his real name. Call himself Peter Pan for all I care. As long as he remained respectful, entertaining and fun then that is what is important to me, not than he told me his name was John but it was really Dave. "
If I met someone calling himself Michael Buble and he wasn't..............
I might be a tad miffed |
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I know an awful lot about the guys i would refer to as regulars but that is because ive been seeing them so long and we became friends. I didnt know everything in the short space of a couple of meets. Obviously its over time and chatting and mutual trust. If someone is coming here i want to know enough about them that they can be traced. I live on my own, they come here and just by being in someones home you know quite a bit about them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I know an awful lot about the guys i would refer to as regulars but that is because ive been seeing them so long and we became friends. I didnt know everything in the short space of a couple of meets. Obviously its over time and chatting and mutual trust. If someone is coming here i want to know enough about them that they can be traced. I live on my own, they come here and just by being in someones home you know quite a bit about them"
I think the thing is with some thay have known there play mates months seen them alot and still thay dont know there real names ... Thay feel a bit hurt and its a trust thing to them . My friend told me his real name after 2nd time i had meet him as new others was up-set about it ... I only think of him as his name here .. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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MMM tried using the wife's alias in real life situations at swingers parties, but I'm just too Dorf. As for me I have one of the most common names in the British telephone directory, I've met 5 individuals born on the same day with the same Christian name and I know of one who was not only born on the same day but has the same middle initial. So if you know my name good for you well done, but I'm afraid no first prize. |
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By *eaboMan
over a year ago
marden |
my username is a nickname i have had for years so i don't mind either.
i was on an outdoor gangbang meet from another site and one guy had to introduce himself as oralfixation. it may sound great online but in front of six complete strangers he struggled. |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"my username is a nickname i have had for years so i don't mind either.
i was on an outdoor gangbang meet from another site and one guy had to introduce himself as oralfixation. it may sound great online but in front of six complete strangers he struggled."
Ditto - simples |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"We prefer people not to use our names on forums, open chat or in verifications.
and what about on a real meet ??"
Have no problem with our names being used on a meet. Infact we recommend it
Just not keen on people using our names in public forums or chat. |
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