Yes, from the doubtless numerous requests from precisely no one, this is the place to share all your own wonderful and uplifting personal stories regarding this most intriguing of phenomenon.
(I rather fancy that this may be a fairly quiet thread....)  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a clean and circumcised chap I can confirm I'm always smegma free  "
Do women prefer that? Have to say I have no experience with your kind. Maybe another thread in the making there  |
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Random Smegma Fact number 2: The said ingredients for anyone reading this who may for reasons best known only to themselves, wish to cultivate some of this most wondrous substance and additionally, highly expressive artistic medium are simply shed skin cells, skin oils and moisture |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"This is totally putting me off my cheese on toast.
Oh my god I just fancy cheese and toast,shame I have no cheese or bread."
It was actually the truth. I had just made cheese on toast  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hahahaha blue waffle! Ent heard of that in time! Unfortunately iv witnessed this sort of thing and blue waffle in my line of work:/ although not as extreme
S |
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"This is totally putting me off my cheese on toast.
Oh my god I just fancy cheese and toast,shame I have no cheese or bread.
It was actually the truth. I had just made cheese on toast "
Try not to think of any putrid secretions then. |
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Know your smegma:
Chaps, always be sure to inspect and clean around the old banjo string - smegma loves hiding there.
Ladies, smegma similarly loves to play hide and seek under your clitoral hoods (imagine a porch eave with cobwebs underneath it)
.....I trust everyone of you are now hurriedly heading for the bathroom for a nervous, smegma free reassurance?  |
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"Know your smegma:
Chaps, always be sure to inspect and clean around the old banjo string - smegma loves hiding there.
Ladies, smegma similarly loves to play hide and seek under your clitoral hoods (imagine a porch eave with cobwebs underneath it)
.....I trust everyone of you are now hurriedly heading for the bathroom for a nervous, smegma free reassurance? "
Im in the bath please no sudden movement |
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"Random smegma factoid: Although more commonly associated with men, did you know that both males and females get it?
Hmmmm.....I’m hungry; Cheese sarnie anyone?"
Yes I did actually. Its made up of dead skin cells and oils from our skin. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a clean and circumcised chap I can confirm I'm always smegma free
Do women prefer that? Have to say I have no experience with your kind. Maybe another thread in the making there "
I do prefer it, I can feel the difference and it is good. |
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"As a clean and circumcised chap I can confirm I'm always smegma free
Do women prefer that? Have to say I have no experience with your kind. Maybe another thread in the making there
I do prefer it, I can feel the difference and it is good. "
Having only been circumcised for about 12 years, I can also confirm it feels a lot better (and cleaner) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a clean and circumcised chap I can confirm I'm always smegma free
Do women prefer that? Have to say I have no experience with your kind. Maybe another thread in the making there
I do prefer it, I can feel the difference and it is good.
Having only been circumcised for about 12 years, I can also confirm it feels a lot better (and cleaner)"
my ex-husband got C'ed and its the only thing I miss about him lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a clean and circumcised chap I can confirm I'm always smegma free
Do women prefer that? Have to say I have no experience with your kind. Maybe another thread in the making there
I do prefer it, I can feel the difference and it is good. "
Perhaps I need to find me one to try
Another thread in the making! |
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Smegma Reassurance Fact:
Although admittedly hardly the most welcome of sights (or smells) the consumption of smegma will not bring about ones dissolution.
With this in mind, if you come across a partner thus afflicted, be sure to do the Christian thing and suck and lick it away - you’ll be just fine and your partner will doubtless thank you for your kindly surgeon fish like attentiveness |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Smegma Reassurance Fact:
Although admittedly hardly the most welcome of sights (or smells) the consumption of smegma will not bring about ones dissolution.
With this in mind, if you come across a partner thus afflicted, be sure to do the Christian thing and suck and lick it away - you’ll be just fine and your partner will doubtless thank you for your kindly surgeon fish like attentiveness "
Good lord! Enough now! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a clean and circumcised chap I can confirm I'm always smegma free
Do women prefer that? Have to say I have no experience with your kind. Maybe another thread in the making there
I do prefer it, I can feel the difference and it is good.
Perhaps I need to find me one to try
Another thread in the making! "
oh please do - you wont regret it, just because when using your hands as there isn't the flexibility of skin anymore lol |
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"Smegma Reassurance Fact:
Although admittedly hardly the most welcome of sights (or smells) the consumption of smegma will not bring about ones dissolution.
With this in mind, if you come across a partner thus afflicted, be sure to do the Christian thing and suck and lick it away - you’ll be just fine and your partner will doubtless thank you for your kindly surgeon fish like attentiveness
Good lord! Enough now!"
It’s not all bad though because.......
Random Smegma Fact number 54 (or something):
Smegma contains Cathepsin B, lysozymes, chymotrypsin, neutrophil elastase and cytokines, which are all actually known to aid the immune system |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Smegma Reassurance Fact:
Although admittedly hardly the most welcome of sights (or smells) the consumption of smegma will not bring about ones dissolution.
With this in mind, if you come across a partner thus afflicted, be sure to do the Christian thing and suck and lick it away - you’ll be just fine and your partner will doubtless thank you for your kindly surgeon fish like attentiveness
Good lord! Enough now!
It’s not all bad though because.......
Random Smegma Fact number 54 (or something):
Smegma contains Cathepsin B, lysozymes, chymotrypsin, neutrophil elastase and cytokines, which are all actually known to aid the immune system "
No sorry. It’s still all bad |
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My horse was the smegma king and it's black in horses lol - warm water and a tube of KY jelly, get in there up to your elbows and get 'em sorted ladies!! 
I told a livery once that she needed to clean her horse as it had a build up of smegma. She said 'What's smegma?'
I told her to go home and ask her husband haha!!  |
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"My horse was the smegma king and it's black in horses lol - warm water and a tube of KY jelly, get in there up to your elbows and get 'em sorted ladies!!
I told a livery once that she needed to clean her horse as it had a build up of smegma. She said 'What's smegma?'
I told her to go home and ask her husband haha!! "
Randesh whatever, did that with his trip to the USA with his mum, loved doing it judging by his expression |
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Smegma DIY:
Bored? Need a hobby? Why not take up the fascinating and highly rewarding art of Smegma Cultivation?
It’s so easy; You won’t even need any special equiptment nor any particular set of skills to master this amazing art.
In fact, chaps, your bell end (and ladies, your clitoral hood) is your very own, home petri dish so simply stop washing them now and sit back and marvel at all you can grow.
Hell, your resulting immaculately conceived creation even deserves a name. Cheesus maybe? |
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"I thought this was going to be about Red Dwarf - the tv show not the porn category!
I thought someone had just bought a Vauxhall?!..."
A Vauxhall Smegma. I’ve not heard that word since leaving school.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Rub baby oil into your cock/bell twice a week. It reduces the friction that creates the smegma. I shower every day and used to get a small amount every 24 hours due to a tight foreskin, haven't seen any for about 5 years now. |
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"Sorry to be a bit naive. But, what on earth is smegma?
It's a new fragrance by Jean Claude goatybeard.
Semgma le essence of a manwhat's it smell off?"
It’s a sort of whiffy cross between stale sweat and cat food..... |
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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago
STOKE ON TRENT |
"Sorry to be a bit naive. But, what on earth is smegma?
It's a new fragrance by Jean Claude goatybeard.
Semgma le essence of a manwhat's it smell off?
It’s a sort of whiffy cross between stale sweat and cat food..... "
thanks x |
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Random Smegma Fact number 784 etc. etc. blah, blah:
Whilst generally nothing more than an unsightly, malodorous and indeed somewhat sexually offputting phenomenon (with the exception of Smegma porn as we previously discovered on this thread...), the most severe cases of the condition can result in what is termed, ‘Hismosis’. This is characterised by a hard ring of smegma which forms inside the foreskin and subsequently prevents it from retracting. This condition can prove rather painful for those so afflicted.
....Indeed, I’ve been trying for months to prize mine back with a bloody crowbar but still can’t get it to budge  |
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By *ideGuyMan
over a year ago
Brighton Marina |
I actually find it a bit of a turn on...
I like to pull back my forskin and smell my own...
Its just stale sweat,piss & cum.
Obviously I'm clean when I meet people.
unless their profile says they like "man smells" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im really not sure I dare read this thread thanks. Don't read it x
It is indeed a most deplorable and disgusting thread obviously started by a clearly sick individual.
.....oh.....wait....  "
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"I actually find it a bit of a turn on...
I like to pull back my forskin and smell my own...
Its just stale sweat,piss & cum.
Obviously I'm clean when I meet people.
unless their profile says they like "man smells" "
Mmmmm |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whats smegma porn? Or do i even wanna no? Instant regret this
Part of me wants to search for it but I know I won't be able to unsee it so probably won't "
Where it exists and not been kept clean, it's the whitish smelly gunk under a man's foreskin.... Hence any reference to cheesy knobs! |
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"Random Smegma Fact number 784 etc. etc. blah, blah:
Whilst generally nothing more than an unsightly, malodorous and indeed somewhat sexually offputting phenomenon (with the exception of Smegma porn as we previously discovered on this thread...), the most severe cases of the condition can result in what is termed, ‘Hismosis’. This is characterised by a hard ring of smegma which forms inside the foreskin and subsequently prevents it from retracting. This condition can prove rather painful for those so afflicted.
....Indeed, I’ve been trying for months to prize mine back with a bloody crowbar but still can’t get it to budge "
A guy on The Sex Clinic had this and when the Dr asked when he last pulled back the foreskin to clean himself he said he had never done that - I almost threw up! |
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"Whats smegma porn? Or do i even wanna no? Instant regret this
Part of me wants to search for it but I know I won't be able to unsee it so probably won't
Where it exists and not been kept clean, it's the whitish smelly gunk under a man's foreskin.... Hence any reference to cheesy knobs! "
Oh I know what it is I was referring to smegma porn |
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By *hoirCouple
over a year ago
Clacton/Bury St. Edmunds |
"As a clean and circumcised chap I can confirm I'm always smegma free "
New to this thread and this made me laugh. Smegma is a normal thing for any cock or clitoris. It is only when it is in excess that it is an issue. It's naturally occurring and a natural lubricant that happens with both cut and uncut men.
C |
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