So....I pulled back my curtains and saw it there, just sitting on my lawn.
I’ve never seen anything quite like it.
Upon closer inspection, it appears to be some form of very light metallic composite. Visually it is cylindrical, a blueish tinge and bears strange markings on its side which resemble the word, ‘Fosters’.
Clearly it must be extraterrestrial in origin; Should I contact the Ministry Of Defence or possibly the Ministry Of Sound? - I always get them confused.
Anyway, many thanks in advance  |
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"Pop onto FaceAche. Find your local UFO ET phone home group and alert them immediately. Afterwards, call Spielberg. He’s gonna want the rights to the epic movie. "
That’s a great idea (I could get rich from this!).
One other thing I failed to mention is that whilst the strange object has clearly opened a strange shaped, ‘hatch’ like aperture on one of its ends, there appears to remain remnants of a curiously urine-like smelling liquid inside still.
If I drink it will I develop super human powers like Superman or possibly Phil Mitchell from Eastenders? |
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"Was there a package next to it with MARS written on it? "
It’s funny that you should mention this as there is indeed a wafer-thin plastic like apparition with that very word upon it  There is also a slightly larger, aluminium like foil object bearing the word ‘Walkers’ upon it next to the aforementioned. Are you with the MOD? Have you received similar reports prior to mine? Is this a sign of an imminent alien invasion? |
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"
It’s funny that you should mention this as there is indeed a wafer-thin plastic like apparition with that very word upon it There is also a slightly larger, aluminium like foil object bearing the word ‘Walkers’ upon it next to the aforementioned. Are you with the MOD? Have you received similar reports prior to mine? Is this a sign of an imminent alien invasion? "
I cannot say on this public forum but please go and hide under your stairs and wrap yourself in aluminium foil and put a metal colander on your head. We will sound a loud klaxon when it is safe for you to come out |
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Sorry to disappoint you all but it’s simply the detrious of a human condition known as filthylazylitterbastarditus.
Usually Red Bull cans. I’m sure Fosters, Stella,Red Bull all say on the can ‘on completion of this beverage, simply throw the empty can out of the car window’. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You mean that Doris next door might be the culprit?! Bloody hell - I always suspected that old bugger was not of this earth. Extraterrestrial old bitch is going to get it now..... "
Maybe not then. I’ve got a big burly guy that breaks concrete for a living next to me. I don’t condone going around beating up old folk  |
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