You know the scene right? You’re in a public place (Asda earlier for me) wearing tight trousers, when you suddenly develop the mother of all scrotum itches!
You can’t exactly scratch it openly (given the surroundings) so you try to perform the tried and tested ‘Slip a hand in the pocket and scratch the offending bollocks from the side.’ technique....
Alas! Christ on a pogo-stick! - The trouser pocket is too bloody tight to get your hand in!!!
Panic suddenly sets in; Chaps, what the hell do you do?!
As this is the age of equality, ladies, please feel free to join in also with your very own, ‘Itchy Southern Hemisphere Whilst Out In Public’ tales of woe
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Rub it against the trolley."
A good technique indeed sir; The only downside of course, is the very real possibility of a trolly administered, static electric shock although even then, it must be surely be better than the excruciating agony of an itchy ball bag...  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I recently had a piercing downstairs. It itched so much I almost cried but after bonkers advice from my piercer I haven’t had the issue since. I can’t disclose it because it’s ridiculous but don’t dance the itchy groin dance and don’t scratch it in public. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I recently had a piercing downstairs. It itched so much I almost cried but after bonkers advice from my piercer I haven’t had the issue since. I can’t disclose it because it’s ridiculous but don’t dance the itchy groin dance and don’t scratch it in public. "
Trade secrets eh?
I tried the old Kegel like, ‘clinch’ technique which sometimes provides a semblance of relief but alas, not on this occasion. In truth I managed to waddle off to the pets aisle and gave it a not so subtle scratch there and then as no one is usually ever there (and luckily easn’t today either)  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I saw a gorgeous girl at about 7am this morning. I was driving past her as she stood at the bus stop and she must have got a sudden attack of "hungry arse".
As the streets were deserted she obviously thought it was safe to try to extract her undies from her bum by attempting to pinch the material of her almost sprayed on jeans whilst doing a little jig. It put a smile on my face anyway, and took my mind off my impending interview for a minute. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
