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Female perspective
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Little bit of advice/opinion needed on this....so I've been chatting with a lady on here for a few days. All going well. She suggested a chat on kik. Again all good just getting to know each other and trivial stuff,nothing smutty.
Mid conversation the chat just stopped. I've left it for a few days and messaged a friendly message this morning which again was read but not replied to. The lady in question is on my friends list here and has been active today. She hasn't blocked me on either (not that I've given any reason to) just stopped replying.
Would you wait it out or block and move on? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I'd suggest waiting a few days before you block her. Sometimes life just gets in the way of chats and it's very likely that she is chatting to several people at once.
"
I did think of that scenario but from a person who was writing back and eager to apparently not being bothered I'd take it as a bad sign. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Some go long stretches between conversing OP. I'm guilty of it myself. If you feel that it is not your thing, then block and move on. "
I don't mind time between messages at all and I wouldn't expect anyone to write back immediately or the likes. I just found it strange that my messages are read but not replied to...it was a 360 swing on the earlier chat is all. I don't want to be wasting my time on people who aren't interested, nor do I want to appear like some sort of weird stalker haha. |
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"..from a person who was writing back and eager to apparently not being bothered I'd take it as a bad sign."
Not replying instantly doesn’t mean ‘not bothered’..perhaps she’s having second thoughts or thinking she was ‘too keen’..we’re strange creatures at times us women.
Why jump to conclusions? Ask her what has made her cool off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some go long stretches between conversing OP. I'm guilty of it myself. If you feel that it is not your thing, then block and move on.
I don't mind time between messages at all and I wouldn't expect anyone to write back immediately or the likes. I just found it strange that my messages are read but not replied to...it was a 360 swing on the earlier chat is all. I don't want to be wasting my time on people who aren't interested, nor do I want to appear like some sort of weird stalker haha."
I can understand trying to find the balance haha. Perhaps give it a few more days, then ask if she still wants to chat at all? If she doesn't reply to that, for a little, then block her haha. |
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Maybe after her initial chat with you she decided you maybe wasn't for her and just found that not messaging you was much easier than having to tell you that I've done it ill admit but don't get round to blocking or like someone else has said they could be chatting to a few people and someone else tickles their fancy a little bit more and then got busy with every day life  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Some go long stretches between conversing OP. I'm guilty of it myself. If you feel that it is not your thing, then block and move on.
I don't mind time between messages at all and I wouldn't expect anyone to write back immediately or the likes. I just found it strange that my messages are read but not replied to...it was a 360 swing on the earlier chat is all. I don't want to be wasting my time on people who aren't interested, nor do I want to appear like some sort of weird stalker haha.
I can understand trying to find the balance haha. Perhaps give it a few more days, then ask if she still wants to chat at all? If she doesn't reply to that, for a little, then block her haha."
I think I've done all I can do tbh...there'll be no more messages from my end. I'm just a little confused  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Block and move on unless you like doing a monologue.
You don't have to block her either but when she messages you, if she does, ignore her message."
This is the thing. I'm not into these 4 or 5 day gaps in chatting. To me it's pointless. At the same time I don't want to block the person in case I'm being hasty but the signs don't look good. |
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"Block and move on unless you like doing a monologue.
You don't have to block her either but when she messages you, if she does, ignore her message.
This is the thing. I'm not into these 4 or 5 day gaps in chatting. To me it's pointless. At the same time I don't want to block the person in case I'm being hasty but the signs don't look good."
There will probably be a good explanation for it. I’ve had the same with males with a two week gap between messages then they expect to pick up where they left off, explanation was ‘life’. Don’t get hung up on her OP, don’t block her, just find another lady. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Block and move on unless you like doing a monologue.
You don't have to block her either but when she messages you, if she does, ignore her message.
This is the thing. I'm not into these 4 or 5 day gaps in chatting. To me it's pointless. At the same time I don't want to block the person in case I'm being hasty but the signs don't look good."
Oh I completely get you. Treat ppl as they treat you. She read your message, got time to log on here yet didn't have one minute to reply... Even a quick: 'sorry I read your message but I M busy I'll get back to you as soon as I can.'
Like I said to not waste any more energy messaging her anymore. Just move on . |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Block and move on unless you like doing a monologue.
You don't have to block her either but when she messages you, if she does, ignore her message.
This is the thing. I'm not into these 4 or 5 day gaps in chatting. To me it's pointless. At the same time I don't want to block the person in case I'm being hasty but the signs don't look good.
There will probably be a good explanation for it. I’ve had the same with males with a two week gap between messages then they expect to pick up where they left off, explanation was ‘life’. Don’t get hung up on her OP, don’t block her, just find another lady. "
Thank you. I'm not hung up but did like how it was going and the attraction was there. So I'd hate to end up regretting it if there was a legit reason. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Block and move on unless you like doing a monologue.
You don't have to block her either but when she messages you, if she does, ignore her message.
This is the thing. I'm not into these 4 or 5 day gaps in chatting. To me it's pointless. At the same time I don't want to block the person in case I'm being hasty but the signs don't look good.
Oh I completely get you. Treat ppl as they treat you. She read your message, got time to log on here yet didn't have one minute to reply... Even a quick: 'sorry I read your message but I M busy I'll get back to you as soon as I can.'
Like I said to not waste any more energy messaging her anymore. Just move on . "
That's the part that grates on me. A reply of any sort would let me know where I'm at. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Block and move on unless you like doing a monologue.
You don't have to block her either but when she messages you, if she does, ignore her message.
This is the thing. I'm not into these 4 or 5 day gaps in chatting. To me it's pointless. At the same time I don't want to block the person in case I'm being hasty but the signs don't look good.
Oh I completely get you. Treat ppl as they treat you. She read your message, got time to log on here yet didn't have one minute to reply... Even a quick: 'sorry I read your message but I M busy I'll get back to you as soon as I can.'
Like I said to not waste any more energy messaging her anymore. Just move on .
That's the part that grates on me. A reply of any sort would let me know where I'm at."
Exactly, especially after getting on well amd taking it to kik.
Some ppl are like that though but I do not waste my energy to build a relationship with them though. If they don't have the decency to reply to a nice message, especially when they are the ond instigating the chat, I just treat them the same way. |
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"Block and move on unless you like doing a monologue.
You don't have to block her either but when she messages you, if she does, ignore her message.
This is the thing. I'm not into these 4 or 5 day gaps in chatting. To me it's pointless. At the same time I don't want to block the person in case I'm being hasty but the signs don't look good.
There will probably be a good explanation for it. I’ve had the same with males with a two week gap between messages then they expect to pick up where they left off, explanation was ‘life’. Don’t get hung up on her OP, don’t block her, just find another lady.
Thank you. I'm not hung up but did like how it was going and the attraction was there. So I'd hate to end up regretting it if there was a legit reason. "
You sound hung up on her OP, enough to start a thread about it. Life can get in the way sometimes but unfortunately people on here do not acknowledge that fact, they want instant replies. People have lives outside of Fab  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Block and move on unless you like doing a monologue.
You don't have to block her either but when she messages you, if she does, ignore her message.
This is the thing. I'm not into these 4 or 5 day gaps in chatting. To me it's pointless. At the same time I don't want to block the person in case I'm being hasty but the signs don't look good.
There will probably be a good explanation for it. I’ve had the same with males with a two week gap between messages then they expect to pick up where they left off, explanation was ‘life’. Don’t get hung up on her OP, don’t block her, just find another lady.
Thank you. I'm not hung up but did like how it was going and the attraction was there. So I'd hate to end up regretting it if there was a legit reason.
You sound hung up on her OP, enough to start a thread about it. Life can get in the way sometimes but unfortunately people on here do not acknowledge that fact, they want instant replies. People have lives outside of Fab "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Block and move on unless you like doing a monologue.
You don't have to block her either but when she messages you, if she does, ignore her message.
This is the thing. I'm not into these 4 or 5 day gaps in chatting. To me it's pointless. At the same time I don't want to block the person in case I'm being hasty but the signs don't look good.
Oh I completely get you. Treat ppl as they treat you. She read your message, got time to log on here yet didn't have one minute to reply... Even a quick: 'sorry I read your message but I M busy I'll get back to you as soon as I can.'
Like I said to not waste any more energy messaging her anymore. Just move on . "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Frankly there is no plausible explanation for her not replying, takes seconds to just reply “ I’m really busy at the moment will catch up with you” so block and move on, if you’ve messaged a couple of times and she’s read it she is really not worth your time |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Block and move on unless you like doing a monologue.
You don't have to block her either but when she messages you, if she does, ignore her message.
This is the thing. I'm not into these 4 or 5 day gaps in chatting. To me it's pointless. At the same time I don't want to block the person in case I'm being hasty but the signs don't look good.
There will probably be a good explanation for it. I’ve had the same with males with a two week gap between messages then they expect to pick up where they left off, explanation was ‘life’. Don’t get hung up on her OP, don’t block her, just find another lady.
Thank you. I'm not hung up but did like how it was going and the attraction was there. So I'd hate to end up regretting it if there was a legit reason.
You sound hung up on her OP, enough to start a thread about it. Life can get in the way sometimes but unfortunately people on here do not acknowledge that fact, they want instant replies. People have lives outside of Fab "
I think if you'd read through the thread you'd realise it's not about being hung up on anyone, it's more about what's an appropriate amount of time to wait. I'm not keeping someone on my friends list with access to my pictures who has no intention of meeting me. Unlike the UK everyone is likely to know everyone here. But thanks for the input. |
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"Block and move on unless you like doing a monologue.
You don't have to block her either but when she messages you, if she does, ignore her message.
This is the thing. I'm not into these 4 or 5 day gaps in chatting. To me it's pointless. At the same time I don't want to block the person in case I'm being hasty but the signs don't look good.
There will probably be a good explanation for it. I’ve had the same with males with a two week gap between messages then they expect to pick up where they left off, explanation was ‘life’. Don’t get hung up on her OP, don’t block her, just find another lady.
Thank you. I'm not hung up but did like how it was going and the attraction was there. So I'd hate to end up regretting it if there was a legit reason.
You sound hung up on her OP, enough to start a thread about it. Life can get in the way sometimes but unfortunately people on here do not acknowledge that fact, they want instant replies. People have lives outside of Fab
I think if you'd read through the thread you'd realise it's not about being hung up on anyone, it's more about what's an appropriate amount of time to wait. I'm not keeping someone on my friends list with access to my pictures who has no intention of meeting me. Unlike the UK everyone is likely to know everyone here. But thanks for the input."
Well you’ve answered your own thread question then about how long to wait haven’t you? I always say this to people ‘follow your gut feeling and you’ll not go far wrong......so follow your gut feeling about this lady. I think you wanted to do that but sought clarification from the forum on it . Good luck whatever you decide to do |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Block and move on unless you like doing a monologue.
You don't have to block her either but when she messages you, if she does, ignore her message.
This is the thing. I'm not into these 4 or 5 day gaps in chatting. To me it's pointless. At the same time I don't want to block the person in case I'm being hasty but the signs don't look good.
Oh I completely get you. Treat ppl as they treat you. She read your message, got time to log on here yet didn't have one minute to reply... Even a quick: 'sorry I read your message but I M busy I'll get back to you as soon as I can.'
Like I said to not waste any more energy messaging her anymore. Just move on .
That's the part that grates on me. A reply of any sort would let me know where I'm at."
I think it is more annoying if it is read. I don't usually open a message until I've time to properly reply. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
Sometimes it just happens that way OP - there are people here I have a regular ongoing dialogue with, others where there may be a flurry of messages and then nothing for days/weeks and yet more where we'll exchange lengthy messages every once in a while - I wouldn't sweat it overly.
It could be any number of reasons that she's not replied further - life, she's lost interest, she's really a man, she's slowing things down and many many more.
There's no rhyme or reason to it sometimes, nor is there any defined right or wrong way to when it's appropriate to message more or decide to give up the ghost.
If it were me, I'd leave it a while, see if she responds and then drop her a "catch up" message and if that gets no reply just move on - whether you unfriend or block at that point is your call entirely |
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What Gemini Man said. This kind of shit happens a lot. There's not always any rhyme or reason to it and trying to work it out is futile. It is irritating though. Also, I don't think you should block otherwise that just shows you're annoyed? A lot of people are far too trigger happy with their block button in my opinion.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Block and move on unless you like doing a monologue.
You don't have to block her either but when she messages you, if she does, ignore her message.
This is the thing. I'm not into these 4 or 5 day gaps in chatting. To me it's pointless. At the same time I don't want to block the person in case I'm being hasty but the signs don't look good.
Oh I completely get you. Treat ppl as they treat you. She read your message, got time to log on here yet didn't have one minute to reply... Even a quick: 'sorry I read your message but I M busy I'll get back to you as soon as I can.'
Like I said to not waste any more energy messaging her anymore. Just move on . "
Completely agree... if she has time to read then what does a quick I’m busy I’ll reply soon message take??
I think you know yourself really trust what your head is telling you thousands more potentials on the site |
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I like Kik for its convenience great way to get to know someone, but I'm not a fan of the every morning hiiiii and the expectation to chat daily.
For what I'm after, a few relaxed convos with no pressure is more suitable. Like others have said life and possibly other chats might be a priority.
Its best to just assume she'll chat if she can and just relax and chat to others too. |
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