FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Are you ashamed of being a sexual deviant?
Are you ashamed of being a sexual deviant?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Swingers/ people that meet strangers for sex are often perceived as sexual deviants. Are you ashamed of being a sexual deviant?
If it was available, would you have brain surgery or take drugs that would reduce your sex drive and make your sexual desires conform to more moderate standards?
Do you ever wish you were a heterosexual person with a low sex drive? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The day where I'd feel ashamed it would be time to stop. Having said that, I do love my privacy and do not like the need to explain myself and my private life too people.
So if I keep it on the low, it is about per se but privacy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No
No
No
Maybe I'm not really a swinger. I only meet strangers I have taken the time to get to know.
Deviant..... too subjective or even pejorative a term perhaps?
Joining fab seems to be a great way to develop a low sex drive  |
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Yes sometimes, i dont think i should be ashamed but its because of the way i was brought up and what other people say. It would be better to have a low sex drive but i am too old to worry about it now, certainly wouldnt take drugs for it.
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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago
yumsville |
"Swingers/ people that meet strangers for sex are often perceived as sexual deviants. Are you ashamed of being a sexual deviant?
If it was available, would you have brain surgery or take drugs that would reduce your sex drive and make your sexual desires conform to more moderate standards?
Do you ever wish you were a heterosexual person with a low sex drive?"
Do you mean homogeneous or are you making a point of the policy review towards chemical normalisation (I think) and homosexuality here? I can't say I am that familiar with it or that it even existed, just that it's quite sad in this day and age. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Swingers/ people that meet strangers for sex are often perceived as sexual deviants. Are you ashamed of being a sexual deviant?
If it was available, would you have brain surgery or take drugs that would reduce your sex drive and make your sexual desires conform to more moderate standards?
Do you ever wish you were a heterosexual person with a low sex drive?"
yes I hide my face in shame  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No its just stereotyping. Ive never harmed anyone, hurt anyone, been in trouble with the police, i have a history of being a good citizen.
As i have to stand trial in court soon im sure they will try and put this stereotype on me.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Swingers/ people that meet strangers for sex are often perceived as sexual deviants. Are you ashamed of being a sexual deviant?
If it was available, would you have brain surgery or take drugs that would reduce your sex drive and make your sexual desires conform to more moderate standards?
Do you ever wish you were a heterosexual person with a low sex drive?"
Yes sometimes I like to hide my face in boobs  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh i also wouldnt say i have a high sex drive, im just dont judge people on anything except the way they treat othera
Im here cos i dont want a relationship, but then im not out to sleep with everyone |
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By *lceeWoman
over a year ago
Leeds |
That would mean I’d have to accept society’s nonsensical strictures. I’m a libertine, not a deviant. As long as what I do, doesn’t hurt anyone else then it’s absolutely fine.
It’s not about guilt or shame or pride or any other emotion. It’s about being myself, doing what makes me, and those around me happy.
Suck it, society. |
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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago
There and to the left a bit |
If I for one minute accepted that I was a sexual deviant (rather than just being someone who is very open minded about sex and sexuality) I'd not be ashamed of it in the slightest, why should/would I be?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No
No
No
Maybe I'm not really a swinger. I only meet strangers I have taken the time to get to know.
Deviant..... too subjective or even pejorative a term perhaps?
Joining fab seems to be a great way to develop a low sex drive "
It's like bromide. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Swingers/ people that meet strangers for sex are often perceived as sexual deviants. Are you ashamed of being a sexual deviant?
If it was available, would you have brain surgery or take drugs that would reduce your sex drive and make your sexual desires conform to more moderate standards?
Do you ever wish you were a heterosexual person with a low sex drive?"
I think that culturally, in the UK, we are taught from a very early age that sex is dirty and those who like it should be ashamed.
The act of sex for pleasure is a sin in the Catholic Church.
The press and media regularly describe anything but vanilla sex in a marriage as perverse.
The very language we use we, even on this site, such as dirty sex, slut, cuck, sub, whore to name a few, degrade the acts that we enjoy.
Am I ashamed of my sexuality? I would love to say no however, I never talk about it with friends, family or colleagues and would be embarrassed if one of them found my profile on here. So I guess that I am.
Would I take a pill you could conform with ‘normality ‘? Hell no, I love it, I love all of it and would not be me without it.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Swingers/ people that meet strangers for sex are often perceived as sexual deviants. Are you ashamed of being a sexual deviant?
If it was available, would you have brain surgery or take drugs that would reduce your sex drive and make your sexual desires conform to more moderate standards?
Do you ever wish you were a heterosexual person with a low sex drive?
Do you mean homogeneous or are you making a point of the policy review towards chemical normalisation (I think) and homosexuality here? I can't say I am that familiar with it or that it even existed, just that it's quite sad in this day and age. "
What do you mean homogeneous?
No I hadn't heard about the chemical story. Unless you mean the groups that claim they can 'cure' gay people. They are sad. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Swingers/ people that meet strangers for sex are often perceived as sexual deviants. Are you ashamed of being a sexual deviant?
If it was available, would you have brain surgery or take drugs that would reduce your sex drive and make your sexual desires conform to more moderate standards?
Do you ever wish you were a heterosexual person with a low sex drive?
Do you mean homogeneous or are you making a point of the policy review towards chemical normalisation (I think) and homosexuality here? I can't say I am that familiar with it or that it even existed, just that it's quite sad in this day and age.
What do you mean homogeneous?
No I hadn't heard about the chemical story. Unless you mean the groups that claim they can 'cure' gay people. They are sad."
It's a gardening term |
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I don't feel ashamed per se, but I get very sad and certainly frustrated that I get judged; I met someone who assumed that because I was kinky, I was promiscuous to boot, which really isn't the case. Their perception is not my problem, but it doesn't stop that slight niggle of discomfort in my lifestyle choices. |
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"Swingers/ people that meet strangers for sex are often perceived as sexual deviants. Are you ashamed of being a sexual deviant?
If it was available, would you have brain surgery or take drugs that would reduce your sex drive and make your sexual desires conform to more moderate standards?
Do you ever wish you were a heterosexual person with a low sex drive?"
Come again?
Can't speak for others but we are heterosexual people with a pretty good sex drive thank you very much!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm sort of ashamed. I had a very sheltered upbringing, sex wasn't discussed in any context. It was dirty or so I was lead to believe. I'm making up for lost time, and enjoying myself. I'm very careful due to my job, I know for a fact that despite this site being for consenting adults being here for me would be frowned upon. |
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I do not consider myself a deviant... and I would never be ashamed of what I like and want to explore further.... sometimes I struggle with If fab works for me but that’s all!! I enjoy the fact there are like minded people here!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been a heterosexual person with a low sex drive."
Was just about to post exactly this. I struggle with the lows after the hedonistic highs, but definitely not ashamed and am enjoying the novelty of having a sex drive again far too much to want to curtail it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think this is a question for the fetish community.....
Swingers are tame compared to Fetish people.
I’ll put it another way before I get attacked...
I thought nothing could shock me until , I went to a few Fetish events.
Let’s just say playing with blood , needles, knives , and fire makes swinging feel like vanilla sex.... |
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"I think this is a question for the fetish community.....
Swingers are tame compared to Fetish people.
I’ll put it another way before I get attacked...
I thought nothing could shock me until , I went to a few Fetish events.
Let’s just say playing with blood , needles, knives , and fire makes swinging feel like vanilla sex...."
Bahahaha nothing shuts a swinger up like an actual fet event rather than the half-arsed 50 shades set up some swinging clubs provide. |
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By *etLikeMan
over a year ago
most fundamental aspects |
I was first called a deviant on, of all places, a swingers chat room. Not here.
I thanked her for the lovely compliment.
One of my mates now likes to call me a deviant and he gets the same response. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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YES! I hate being a (mostly) heterosexual male. It is the worst sexuality/gender to be. So much desire, so little reciprocation. It's like some kind of cruel curse. I would take that sexual suppressant in a flash. |
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"That would mean I’d have to accept society’s nonsensical strictures. I’m a libertine, not a deviant. As long as what I do, doesn’t hurt anyone else then it’s absolutely fine.
It’s not about guilt or shame or pride or any other emotion. It’s about being myself, doing what makes me, and those around me happy.
Suck it, society. "
I concur |
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"That would mean I’d have to accept society’s nonsensical strictures. I’m a libertine, not a deviant. As long as what I do, doesn’t hurt anyone else then it’s absolutely fine.
It’s not about guilt or shame or pride or any other emotion. It’s about being myself, doing what makes me, and those around me happy.
Suck it, society. "
. Totally agree with this x it’s just an enjoyable hobby for me .quality not quantity x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not at all. I'm lucky that me and my bestest mate are Fbuddies and we both have extremely high sex drives. She doesn't live close unfortunately and we only see each other every other weekend. And what a weekend that usually is !! We naughty facetime every night, usually watching each other wank or watching her with dildo in her lingerie. Sometimes she facetimes me when she's out shopping in a changing room fingering herself !! Which is a pain when I'm at work. Have to dive to the toilets rather quickly !!
Our friends know what we get up to and totally understand about us. 2 pals, a couple, watched us fucking after the 4 of us came back after Ministry busted. Couldn't keep my hands off Lisa and we got it on on the bathroom. Sarah walked in and laughed and called Seb to come see. They got jiggy with it as well in the doorway ( tho not totally naked) We laughed and joked about it as we were getting it on. Was a little weird at first but as I said they knew what me and her were about. They enjoyed it and we talk about it often.
So I suppose it's who you rock around with really...no shame in it. In it !! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Count myself as sexually liberated. But been in the world long enough to know one persons liberated way of thinking is someone elses pervert. "
Good point. |
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"Swingers/ people that meet strangers for sex are often perceived as sexual deviants. Are you ashamed of being a sexual deviant?
If it was available, would you have brain surgery or take drugs that would reduce your sex drive and make your sexual desires conform to more moderate standards?
Do you ever wish you were a heterosexual person with a low sex drive?"
No
No
and
No
Fuck what people think |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Not even the tiniest little bit. Just wish I'd known the options so much earlier. "
Perhaps sex ed. should get better. It was just the biology bit when I was at school.  |
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"Im not ashamed, i do wish more vanilla people were honest with themselves and gave in to what they really want. Theres a lot of pent up frustration out there."
Yes that’s true
I also think that because of stereotypes and youth obsessed culture that many older people lose their vitality as they are afraid of openly expressing what they want sexually .
It’s nice to see all ages on here and in clubs etc .
Sex is a joy I don’t want to have to give up at any age if possible |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't feel ashamed of what I do. Acting like a slut in secret fulfills my fantasies and satisfies my lust. For too many years I've gone without. I enjoy
fucking someone I don't know and I certainly don't want any pills to suppress my mind from thinking like that. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Im not ashamed, i do wish more vanilla people were honest with themselves and gave in to what they really want. Theres a lot of pent up frustration out there.
Yes that’s true
I also think that because of stereotypes and youth obsessed culture that many older people lose their vitality as they are afraid of openly expressing what they want sexually .
It’s nice to see all ages on here and in clubs etc .
Sex is a joy I don’t want to have to give up at any age if possible "
I'm loving the positivity.
I think sometimes, the fact that some 'outsiders' think we are deviants makes it more fun. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I dont feel deviant to be honest. I was on birth control pills for yrs that knocked most of my desire from me. Makes life a bit miserable to be honest, so if I am a deviant then that is preferable to being 'cured' of desires. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm a sex positive deviant, libertine, swinger, kinkster and proud
If anything, I'd put something in the water so the rest of the nation could get over their Victorian attitude to sex"
You need to teach then as I’d be a willing student given my shite catholic background  |
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"I'm a sex positive deviant, libertine, swinger, kinkster and proud
If anything, I'd put something in the water so the rest of the nation could get over their Victorian attitude to sex
You need to teach then as I’d be a willing student given my shite catholic background "
I'm actually working on a show about it. Stayed tuned |
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