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You've got 30 seconds to completely ruin a job interview
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Tell them that the desk they were sat on was incredibly similiar to the one at a gangbang i’d attended last night at a secret location.....
Then pretend to check for stains... |
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"How do you do it? "
I did it once - in an interview in one of the top companies in the world. I confessed I was pissing off to Germany to play with horses for a year, and they asked me to come back as soon as I got back haha!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Tell them your old school and only do a 39 hour week.must have an hour for lunch and you don't work weekends and always go away for 2 weeks at Christmas |
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Was asked to take part in a role play situation with an unhappy customer ....so after I’d completely innocently some how managed to mention ‘tits up , fuck and cunt a few times as I was getting into it ...they asked me to kindly stop as they didn’t think I was suitable for a customers service roll ... x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When the interviewer asks "what do you see yourself doing in five years?" Answer doing you're daughter or son whichever one suits you, same outcome non the less |
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"Put your feet up on the desk and crack open a can of stella 
Hahaha love it xx"
I had this... mind you, he wandered in with a bag of chips and ate them first. The delights of having the job centre insist they book every other 15 minute interview with their flotsam and jetsam as they had leant me the office to do the interviews in.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Forget which interview I,m at and start slagging the company interviewing me off because I think I,m at their rivals. Then fart loudly, spill my tea and giggle a lot in an annoying fashion. XXX |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Telling them that you think one of your weaknesses is that you're too honest, and then replying with "I don't give a shit what you think", when they tell you they don't think being honest is a weakness. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In response to the first question, whatever it is, start complaining "Questions? I didn't realise there'd be questions. What's with all the questions all the time?" Then break into tears screaming "can't you guys stop asking me questions all the time! Day and night! Day and night! I can't sleep!". Then sit bolt upright and in a cold sober voice say "and the sound of your swivelling eye sockets"
That should do it |
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"Tell them your old school and only do a 39 hour week.must have an hour for lunch and you don't work weekends and always go away for 2 weeks at Christmas "
This is literally what I’ve always done and I’ve never had any problems haha. Last Christmas I had a month! 15th-15th
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Walked into an interview. Realised the agency had sent me for a job that I had no relevant experience or training for within 30 seconds so explained to the interviewer I wasn't going to waste their time or mine. Had a coffee and a natter and left!
3 months later they offered me a relevant job! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have interviewed a few arrogant men over the years who have no faults what so ever...….there was not a chance in hell they would like a female boss  "
you can boss me anytime  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Interviewer: Name 1 weakness you have?
Me: I'm sometimes too honest!
Interviewer: ...but honesty is a good thing...
Me: I don't give a shit what you think!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Easy. I just said part way into the intervew 'You know I really don't think I could work for such a bunch of clueless, arrogant arseholes as you. thanks for your time.' Then I got up, shook their hands, enjoyed the bemused looks and left. |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
NOT said by myself but someone turned up for an interview and when asked why he wanted the job, said he really fancied the young lady on Reception and wanted the chance to fuck her one day!
He didn't get the job! The young lady was in fact the M D's daughter! |
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I sat in on an interview with an ex colleague who was interviewing someone for a senior sales role.
My colleague was an arrogant prick who thought he was gods gift to sales.
The guy he was interviewing clearly was more experienced and successful than my colleague, who got quite aggressive in his questioning.
As a "challenge" he pushed his teacup actoss the table and said "if you're such a good salesman, sell me this!"
The guy had clearly had enough of being treated so badly, picked up the cup, threw it against the wall and smashed it. "You need a new cup"
Interview over...... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I sat in on an interview with an ex colleague who was interviewing someone for a senior sales role.
My colleague was an arrogant prick who thought he was gods gift to sales.
The guy he was interviewing clearly was more experienced and successful than my colleague, who got quite aggressive in his questioning.
As a "challenge" he pushed his teacup actoss the table and said "if you're such a good salesman, sell me this!"
The guy had clearly had enough of being treated so badly, picked up the cup, threw it against the wall and smashed it. "You need a new cup"
Interview over......"
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