FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Too complicated.
Too complicated.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Exactly what the title reads .I know I am not the only man that thinks this .
Their rules or no rules 
and then they make up new ones as they go along  |
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i am gonna make it simple for you...
The Women's Rules
1.The female always makes the rules
2.The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.
3.No male can possibly know all the rules.
4.If the female suspects the MALE know all the rules, she must immediately change some or all of the rules.
5.The female is never wrong.
6.If the female is wrong, it is due to a misunderstanding which was a result of something the male did or said wrong.
7.The male must apologize immediately for causing said misunderstanding.
8.The female may change her mind at any time.
9.The male must never change his mind without the express written consent of the female.
10.The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
11.The male must remain calm at all times unless the female wants him to be angry or upset.
12.The female must, under no circumstances, let the male know whether or not she wants him to be angry and/or upset.
13.The male is expected to mind read at all times.
14.Any attempt to document the rules by a man could result in bodily harm.
15.If the female has PMS, all the rules are null and void.
16.The female is ready when she is ready.
17.The male must be ready at all time.
18.The male who doesn't abide by the rules can't take the heat, lacks backbone, and is a wimp.
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lol you asked for it
19. Never do housework. No man ever made love to a woman because the house was spotless.
20. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers.
21. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.
22. So many men - so many reasons not to sleep with any of them.
23. If they put a man on the moon, they should be able to put the mall there.
24. Tell him you're not his type - you have a pulse.
25. Never let your man's mind wander. It's too little to be let out alone.
26. The only reason men are on this planet is that vibrators can't dance or buy drinks.
27. Never sleep with a man who's named his penis.
28. Go for younger men. You might as well. They never mature anyway.
29. A man who can dress himself without looking like Forrest Gump is unquestionably gay.
30. Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.
31. Women don't make fools of men. Most of them are the do-it-yourself types.
32. The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest they are too old for it.
33. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
34. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.
35. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.
36. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him checkbooks.
37. A man's idea of serious commitment is usually "Oh all right, I'll stay the night."
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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" lol you asked for it
19. Never do housework. No man ever made love to a woman because the house was spotless.
20. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers.
21. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.
22. So many men - so many reasons not to sleep with any of them.
23. If they put a man on the moon, they should be able to put the mall there.
24. Tell him you're not his type - you have a pulse.
25. Never let your man's mind wander. It's too little to be let out alone.
26. The only reason men are on this planet is that vibrators can't dance or buy drinks.
27. Never sleep with a man who's named his penis.
28. Go for younger men. You might as well. They never mature anyway.
29. A man who can dress himself without looking like Forrest Gump is unquestionably gay.
30. Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.
31. Women don't make fools of men. Most of them are the do-it-yourself types.
32. The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest they are too old for it.
33. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
34. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.
35. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.
36. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him checkbooks.
37. A man's idea of serious commitment is usually "Oh all right, I'll stay the night."
"
Ok , ok enough |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" lol you asked for it
19. Never do housework. No man ever made love to a woman because the house was spotless.
20. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers.
21. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.
22. So many men - so many reasons not to sleep with any of them.
23. If they put a man on the moon, they should be able to put the mall there.
24. Tell him you're not his type - you have a pulse.
25. Never let your man's mind wander. It's too little to be let out alone.
26. The only reason men are on this planet is that vibrators can't dance or buy drinks.
27. Never sleep with a man who's named his penis.
28. Go for younger men. You might as well. They never mature anyway.
29. A man who can dress himself without looking like Forrest Gump is unquestionably gay.
30. Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.
31. Women don't make fools of men. Most of them are the do-it-yourself types.
32. The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest they are too old for it.
33. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
34. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.
35. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.
36. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him checkbooks.
37. A man's idea of serious commitment is usually "Oh all right, I'll stay the night."
Ok , ok enough "
how very thoughtful - a shopping mall on the moon. niiiiiice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" lol you asked for it
19. Never do housework. No man ever made love to a woman because the house was spotless.
20. Don't imagine you can change a man - unless he's in diapers.
21. What do you do if your boyfriend walks out? You shut the door.
22. So many men - so many reasons not to sleep with any of them.
23. If they put a man on the moon, they should be able to put the mall there.
24. Tell him you're not his type - you have a pulse.
25. Never let your man's mind wander. It's too little to be let out alone.
26. The only reason men are on this planet is that vibrators can't dance or buy drinks.
27. Never sleep with a man who's named his penis.
28. Go for younger men. You might as well. They never mature anyway.
29. A man who can dress himself without looking like Forrest Gump is unquestionably gay.
30. Definition of a bachelor: a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.
31. Women don't make fools of men. Most of them are the do-it-yourself types.
32. The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest they are too old for it.
33. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.
34. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.
35. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.
36. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him checkbooks.
37. A man's idea of serious commitment is usually "Oh all right, I'll stay the night."
Ok , ok enough
how very thoughtful - a shopping mall on the moon. niiiiiice "
Number 26 - neither can most men |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
26. The only reason men are on this planet is that vibrators can't dance or buy drinks.
Number 26 - neither can most men  "
Its number 4 and 5 that I find very confusing
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
26. The only reason men are on this planet is that vibrators can't dance or buy drinks.
Number 26 - neither can most men
I resemble that remark....
"
You tight arse , I would insist on buying the lady a drink .
As for the dancing , I am not so sure on that one lol |
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"Maybe women are not too complicated... it could be that men are too simple 
Explain yourself ?
"
I think the O.P. means that us guys prefer to do things the simple way, rather than complicate them? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So how many men actually follow these rules.
Before the new ones are posted "
me ol mam gave me some good advice. Question authority and, if you have to, just say yes and then do exactly as you want. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"yep men are from mars and women are from venus, not forgetting Invictus's dual Terran/Pluto interplanetary status. "
serves him right he keeps putting it in worm holes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
26. The only reason men are on this planet is that vibrators can't dance or buy drinks.
Number 26 - neither can most men
Its number 4 and 5 that I find very confusing
"
what's to be confused about they are just one, more, or less. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
26. The only reason men are on this planet is that vibrators can't dance or buy drinks.
Number 26 - neither can most men
Its number 4 and 5 that I find very confusing
what's to be confused about they are just one, more, or less."
Added together they become a 9 , turn it upside down and it becomes a 6 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"the key to a happy relationship tho, surely, is to let the man at least think that he sets the rules!?"
Nope, it's far simpler than that: find someone you don't like and buy her a house. |
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