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The Home of Random Thoughts
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Peas.... not had peas for ages. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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After they make bubble wrap, what do they ship it in? |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
wonder why the woman up the road from me never takes her baseball cap off |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Who put the bomp
In the bomp bah bomp bah bomp? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sausages! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Who put the wham in the whamalamadingdong |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Melons |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Who put the wham in the whamalamadingdong "
it wasnt me but i'm always willing to give it a try
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why did you just try singing the two songs above? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why did you just try singing the two songs above?"
i didnt.
i was to busy looking at ya boobs
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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago
glasgow |
if god came to visit.
would you have to give him,
tea and biscuits hmmm. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why did you just try singing the two songs above?"
damm, guilty. i did |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"if god came to visit.
would you have to give him,
tea and biscuits hmmm. "
Thats me fooked then...
I have neither |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Did you know that 6 out of 7 dwarfs are not happy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground? |
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How long was it since I was out with Mick, must be about 6 months.
Must remember to Google moon cheese.
The 70's had much better shapes in clouds. I once saw Bruce Forsyth in a cloud, great big cloudy chin chin hehehe.
I haven't had my lunch time wank. |
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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago
glasgow |
"if god came to visit.
would you have to give him,
tea and biscuits hmmm.
Thats me fooked then...
I have neither "
lol
i think you'll be safe peaches.
he'll probably try to avoid the
mentally insane . |
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Are dwarves really dwarves or are we just giants... |
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No fags left .... do I get dressed and go to the shop or use the electric ciggie?
Why does thia green chicken soup take 5 minutes on the hob and 7.5 fecking minutes in the microwave! |
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If I put an up-side down glass bowl on top of a saucer filled with water it would probably make a great Centre Parcs for ants. Maybe point the sprinkler at it to simulate the constant rain. |
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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago
glasgow |
i tried the electric ciggy's polo,they'r ok in the house,
but it's a b******,finding a socket when you'r out. |
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"If I put an up-side down glass bowl on top of a saucer filled with water it would probably make a great Centre Parcs for ants. Maybe point the sprinkler at it to simulate the constant rain."
Maybe some bonsai trees for a forest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just been up the garden centre and bought killer.....how does it know which are s 'cos I don't? |
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"Just been up the garden centre and bought killer.....how does it know which are s 'cos I don't? "
It's green based. It only kills dark green things, light green things are safe. |
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I may have to get dressed and go to the co-op |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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banoffee pie |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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wild strawberry and clotted cream milkshake mmmmmmmmmmmmm |
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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago
glasgow |
they say,there are more questions,than answers.
just dont ask so many questions. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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mmmmmmm sunny delight the drink obiviusly |
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I shouldn't... I shouldn't... I really really really know I shouldn't but I am and I know I shouldn't be.
I am bad, it's wrong and I know I shouldn't but still HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! |
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I guess I must believe in Karma….. I am here to redress the balance by being bad… to make up for all the good things I do in real life |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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just did mine in waitrose as i couldnt be arsed to go shopping x
online shop and came under 80.00
pretty good for a weekly shop sainsburys cost me 100 lol |
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Feck off don't be a spazzzz! I send the kids in to do the nicking you spanner. |
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My Mum used to say to me sometimes at the dinner table 'Funky Junior your eyes are bigger than your belly!!!'
She is full of shit! I can easily eat 9 maybe 10 eyes and still have room for pud. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why is it when the sun comes out I get a thirst for a beer. Mmmm shall I take the kids to the beer garden for their tea. |
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"Feck off don't be a spazzzz! I send the kids in to do the nicking you spanner.
so your the fagin of leicster "
Are you feckin' chupid!... I need to get fags from the co-op... so no I don't have a FAG IN! |
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"Feck off don't be a spazzzz! I send the kids in to do the nicking you spanner.
so your the fagin of leicster "
Urchin: 'Ere these sausages are mouldy Polo!'
Polo: 'Shaddap and drink yer gin!'
Quote from the original Dickens manuscript.
True story.
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"just did mine in waitrose as i couldnt be arsed to go shopping x
online shop and came under 80.00
pretty good for a weekly shop sainsburys cost me 100 lol"
well if you went on one my long shopping experditions around brum last sat went only out for an hour some how ended up in west brom 5 hours later back home at 7 think i missed my stop |
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Chocolate Strawberries are not the only fruit..... |
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"Feck off don't be a spazzzz! I send the kids in to do the nicking you spanner.
so your the fagin of leicster
Urchin: 'Ere these sausages are mouldy Polo!'
Polo: 'Shaddap and drink yer gin!'
Quote from the original Dickens manuscript.
True story.
"
Now sing me "I'd do anything for you do anything ... anything for you" and wipe your nose on your sleeve a lot. |
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"Now sing me "I'd do anything for you do anything ... anything for you" and wipe your nose on your sleeve a lot."
Let's take this to PM Nancy xxx |
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WoooHoooooo!
Cue the Pointer Sisters .....
Tonight's the night we're gonna make it happen
Tonight we'll put all other things aside ....... I'm so excited and I just can't hide it
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That's it... the weekend starts right now.... well it actuallt started when I went to make the soup... but it's official now it's after 5pm.
I have a Grand National Party tomorrow which is planned to finish sometime on Sunday (the party not the race)... and a welcome visitor this evening.
Great weather for Saturday... so looks like the BBQ will be out as well.
FUCKING ACE! |
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"That's it... the weekend starts right now.... well it actuallt started when I went to make the soup... but it's official now it's after 5pm.
I have a Grand National Party tomorrow which is planned to finish sometime on Sunday (the party not the race)... and a welcome visitor this evening.
Great weather for Saturday... so looks like the BBQ will be out as well.
FUCKING ACE!"
I might stay on for the BBQ and have me a few bangers! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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horse walks into a bar... |
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Nice one
I'll handle getting the meat ready... but it's bring your own buns... and it looks like your already packin' |
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mmm ice cold beer would be nice now |
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A cow gives nearly 200,000 glasses of milk in her lifetime. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ive just had some weetabix xx |
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An adulterous Greek male was sometimes punished by the removal of his pubic hair and the insertion of a large radish into his rectum. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A cow gives nearly 200,000 glasses of milk in her lifetime. "
Nearly 200,000 glasses of milk are taken from a cow in her lifetime. |
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I wish i was a pig..
according to scientists, a pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If two and a half glasses of milk go into every half pound bar of Cadbury's chocolate how many quater pound bars could you make if you take one eigth of the milk you could get from three cows in their life time.
Assume all cows live for the same length of time - that CJD has not caused them to wobble and die early. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wish i was a pig..
according to scientists, a pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes. "
Looks like you've been asking things of fairies |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"An adulterous Greek male was sometimes punished by the removal of his pubic hair and the insertion of a large radish into his rectum."
rectum???? damn near killed um. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"An adulterous Greek male was sometimes punished by the removal of his pubic hair and the insertion of a large radish into his rectum."
Blimey some folks class that as fun now lol xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sassy would call em wussy ...... she's a wasabi woman x |
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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago
glasgow |
they say,in life,you dont always get what you want.
sometimes you have to settle for second best,or worse.
now bearing this in mind.
do any of you laydeez,fancy a shag. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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why do people who u say no to think no means a maybe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i just block now easier |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hmmm...looking out into the garden. I wonder if the garden will itself? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hmmm...looking out into the garden. I wonder if the garden will itself? "
if it does i want the secret |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i just block now easier
like a lot of peeps on here i dont i have message filters for that keeps the bi guys away from my door who are pain at time " #
my message filters are set up
at the moment im getting messages from 55 years of age plus lol
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've run out of teabags :o( |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why am I watching "The only way is Essex" omnibus..ffs..!!! |
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"i just block now easier
like a lot of peeps on here i dont i have message filters for that keeps the bi guys away from my door who are pain at time #
my message filters are set up
at the moment im getting messages from 55 years of age plus lol
"
ive got to say thanks to fab for the tv/ts filter nice guys but not for me thankyou |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i just block now easier
like a lot of peeps on here i dont i have message filters for that keeps the bi guys away from my door who are pain at time #
my message filters are set up
at the moment im getting messages from 55 years of age plus lol
ive got to say thanks to fab for the tv/ts filter nice guys but not for me thankyou "
i speak to a few and help a few out x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why am I watching "The only way is Essex" omnibus..ffs..!!!
and u admit it "
Sitting rocking and drooling...i'm slipping into a coma..cant turn it off...heeelllppp.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why am I watching "The only way is Essex" omnibus..ffs..!!!
and u admit it
Sitting rocking and drooling...i'm slipping into a coma..cant turn it off...heeelllppp.. "
who u dribbling over? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why am I watching "The only way is Essex" omnibus..ffs..!!!
and u admit it
Sitting rocking and drooling...i'm slipping into a coma..cant turn it off...heeelllppp..
who u dribbling over?"
Mr Darcy the pig...Its ok "Glee" is on in a minute and I can start singing... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i like gleee |
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I am uber happy today and I'm still in bed! Result! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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At the end of a wood, a piggy wigg stood. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Once in a finesse of fiddles ....I found ectasy.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ha! Dreams come true x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i need some good hard sex |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Lonesome pixalted passions ...and perspective arbiters of mirthful joy ... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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and i cant be arsed to put a meet listing up lol
i think the weathers making me feel lazy |
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arent spur of the moments meets the best there over before they have begun |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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yeah thats what im thinking
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"yeah thats what im thinking
"
well thinking and reality of doing these types of meets is completely different |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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yeah
but noone has made me want to meet them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago
Livingston |
I've just hung out my washing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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wish my cats was like thst
update
im drinking tea and my delivery is stuck in belgum |
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rod stewart mmm what a sexy voice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Going fa a bath byeeeeeeeeeee xx |
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"Going fa a bath byeeeeeeeeeee xx "
oh bubbles |
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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago
Livingston |
sunshine and cold beer..... just need a shag now |
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why do they put "please store upright after opening" on juice/milk cartons |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why did Kamakazi pilots wear helmets ! |
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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago
Livingston |
I need to go to the shop, but can't remember what it is I am going for!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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why am i such a pussy that i go to light water valley theme park yesterday and i will only go on the roller coasters. there are some rides there that children of 7 and 8 were going on that i couldnt face.
and ive fought the taliban in southern afghanistan. im such a loser.
any other people been so imasculated and belittled on the inside that it actually makes you feel pity for yourself?
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why am I more attractive to girls when they think I'm seeing someone? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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why do i always want a meet when its time of the month x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why do i always feel most horny when im ill?? xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why do i always feel most horny when im ill?? xx " so yer not when you are feeling fit |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why do i always feel most horny when im ill?? xx so yer not when you are feeling fit"
yeah i do
But like i said more so when im ill lol xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why do i always feel most horny when im ill?? xx "
Coz yur sick...
(Get well soon....) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why do i always feel most horny when im ill?? xx so yer not when you are feeling fit
yeah i do
But like i said more so when im ill lol xx " I know exactly what you mean and you know I do. |
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This week feels like it started too early. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My iron is plastic |
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"My iron is plastic "
Are you Barbie |
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Why do children have to scream so feckin' loud when/after they fall over? |
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have enjoyed having few days off work, dont want to go back tomorrow |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"have enjoyed having few days off work, dont want to go back tomorrow "
agreed x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My Ken is sans genitalia |
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"Why do children have to scream so feckin' loud when/after they fall over?
tut tut all children are little angels "
If they are all little angels then heaven must be noisey as fuck! |
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"Why do children have to scream so feckin' loud when/after they fall over?
tut tut all children are little angels
If they are all little angels then heaven must be noisey as fuck!"
now now you know you love them |
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"Why do children have to scream so feckin' loud when/after they fall over?
tut tut all children are little angels
If they are all little angels then heaven must be noisey as fuck!
now now you know you love them "
There is nothing loveable about a strident shrill piercing through the air. |
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I wonder when Chimpanzees will evolve into humans.
They seem to have stagnated.
Come on guys you're losing the human race!!! |
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"I wonder when Chimpanzees will evolve into humans.
They seem to have stagnated.
Come on guys you're losing the human race!!!"
As a side note they say Chimpanzees are only a few chromosomes away from us. It's actually much less than that, when I was at Barcelona zoo there was one that was only half a metre away from us. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If unicorn is one - what number is lepra? |
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"If unicorn is one - what number is lepra?"
They don't do numbers as they are prone to losing digits... which sometimes makes it difficult to ring their bells to warn people they are infected. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If unicorn is one - what number is lepra?
They don't do numbers as they are prone to losing digits... which sometimes makes it difficult to ring their bells to warn people they are infected."
No! Lepro is a totally different system altogether.
I as talking about Lepra ......
Difference is crystal |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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why do bath bombs not blow up - only fizz |
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hmmm a taser would be so handy right now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"hmmm a taser would be so handy right now "
I waited and waited but ya never came xx |
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"hmmm a taser would be so handy right now
I waited and waited but ya never came xx "
i did turn up i was at the corner lol
x |
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why do doctors leave the room while you undress but are gonna see you nakedish anyway |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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[Removed by poster at 13/04/11 21:08:53] |
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is there ever a day when beds are not for sale on a once only "special" offer |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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[Removed by poster at 13/04/11 21:10:17] |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Who put an s in lisp ?? xx |
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what do people in china call their good plates |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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in a fight which veg would always lose ????? and be the first to be extinct on earth without man, women would save the cucumber at all costs of course lol |
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do fish really just smell fishy or do they all really smell bad ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"do fish really just smell fishy or do they all really smell bad ?"
Following on from that one what does a fish's fanny smell of?? xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If Typhoo put the "T" in Britain...
Who put the c**t in Scunthorpe...? |
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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago
glasgow |
hypothetically.
if you bought a flying carpet,that doesn't fly.
have you just bought a carpet.
from a f****** shyster.
grrrrrrrrrrrr hypothetically, |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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How does killer know ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What would you rather be or a wasp? |
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"What would you rather be or a wasp?"
no always a hornet a lot bigger |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
i have made too many muffins |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"have you ever wondered what the other side of your bellybutton looks like? "
Blue...like the front and full of fluff |
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"i have made too many muffins "
send them here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Muffin the Mule is illegal in seventeen countries... |
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if god created everything WHO created god ??? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why does Donald Duck get out of the bath and put a towel around his waist when he runs around without any pants on the rest of the time? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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statistically only 1 in 6 people are against gang rape..... |
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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago
Cyprus |
Why does a man have to use every saucepan you possess just to make beans on toast? |
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