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Bitterness
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Is it just me or are others coming across more jealousy and bitterness these days on here. What makes someone end up becoming unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When people insult them personally in a thread, without even attempting to add to that thread.
That'll do it."
Well i haven't seen anyone directly insult you so what other reasons prompt it? |
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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago
Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else |
"What makes someone end up becoming unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative?"
Good point. I try to avoid it, but if a post catches me in the wrong frame of mind...it happens.
Thanks for the reality check.
*goes to focus on some positives* |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What makes someone end up becoming unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative?
Good point. I try to avoid it, but if a post catches me in the wrong frame of mind...it happens.
Thanks for the reality check.
*goes to focus on some positives*"
But your more on the sarcasm side not being offensive. I have noted some will react badly to sarcasm as they are unable to cope with it at times. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"lack of attention 
That seems the most likely to me. But it gives them negative attention, surely that's not what they really want is it? "
as the saying goes, there's no such thing as bad news, so albeit negative attention, its attention all the same. Personally though, I'd rather be ignored than abused. |
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"What makes someone end up becoming unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative?
Good point. I try to avoid it, but if a post catches me in the wrong frame of mind...it happens.
Thanks for the reality check.
*goes to focus on some positives*
But your more on the sarcasm side not being offensive. I have noted some will react badly to sarcasm as they are unable to cope with it at times."
i think you have to be of sarcastic nature to get sarcastic posts - i am very sarcastic in real life so rarely take offence to things posted on here.
i do think some ofmy posts get taken the wrong way because sarcasm is often hard to get across in the written form |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"lack of attention
That seems the most likely to me. But it gives them negative attention, surely that's not what they really want is it?
as the saying goes, there's no such thing as bad news, so albeit negative attention, its attention all the same. Personally though, I'd rather be ignored than abused. "
Well Mally you have been here quite a while so people know who you are and you don't need the look at me thing. But do people really want the negative side just for the "look at me" factor. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I dislike, though I am learning to bite my tongue, when a thread is of the nature "Whats your favourite X" and people post comments like "I don't like X".
It kinda ruins conversation about the nature of the thread. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What makes someone end up becoming unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative?
Good point. I try to avoid it, but if a post catches me in the wrong frame of mind...it happens.
Thanks for the reality check.
*goes to focus on some positives*
But your more on the sarcasm side not being offensive. I have noted some will react badly to sarcasm as they are unable to cope with it at times.
i think you have to be of sarcastic nature to get sarcastic posts - i am very sarcastic in real life so rarely take offence to things posted on here.
i do think some ofmy posts get taken the wrong way because sarcasm is often hard to get across in the written form"
Well from what i have read some people don't have any difficulty with that at all. You are just lovely. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What makes someone end up becoming unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative?
Resisting the temptation to get involved is far easier Actually, it takes a lot of effort to become argumentative / objectionable / bitter  I'd rather focus any effort elsewhere "
When it takes so much effort though there must be some underlying emotion within a person to make them like that don't you think? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think sometimes the pack mentality is also at work. Someone may say something and all the forum regulars jump in for a virtual kicking.
There are certain posts I avoid as I know they hold no interest, same applies if I see threads started, last person to post and it's someone I'd rather not engage with...it's not hard to ignore people.
That said, these are open forums and everyone is entitled to voice their opinion, even if it goes against what everyone is thinking at that moment.
Makes a refreshing change reading someone elses viewpoint instead of the usual "I agree with you" responses.
Starting threads like this to have a "subtle" dig doesn't help either!  |
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when people immediately try to put you down in order to make themselves look clever.
when they are antagonistic because you differ in your opinion from theirs and are therefore wrong.
this is when people come across as being paranoid and unfriendly |
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"What makes someone end up becoming unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative?
Good point. I try to avoid it, but if a post catches me in the wrong frame of mind...it happens.
Thanks for the reality check.
*goes to focus on some positives*
But your more on the sarcasm side not being offensive. I have noted some will react badly to sarcasm as they are unable to cope with it at times.
i think you have to be of sarcastic nature to get sarcastic posts - i am very sarcastic in real life so rarely take offence to things posted on here.
i do think some ofmy posts get taken the wrong way because sarcasm is often hard to get across in the written formWell from what i have read some people don't have any difficulty with that at all. You are just lovely."
awww shucks  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"when people immediately try to put you down in order to make themselves look clever.
when they are antagonistic because you differ in your opinion from theirs and are therefore wrong.
this is when people come across as being paranoid and unfriendly"
I would like to know, are you capable of being nice? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I dont like bitterness, Im more of a chilled lager man in the summer, and a red wine man in the winter  "
Constructive debates are often good but its the bitterness that is just so wrong at times.
Pour me a larger i'm parched. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well Mally you have been here quite a while so people know who you are and you don't need the look at me thing. But do people really want the negative side just for the "look at me" factor."
very good question but I can only answer from my own personal experiences, how some one would like to be popular because theyre unpopular is beyond me and I know myself I've turned people against me in the past and will probably do it again in the future from my comments, something I have found out though is some regular posters here are completely different in person, so does the forum create and alter ego? where one can be offensive, sarcastic but in person, are really very nice to be around. |
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"When it takes so much effort though there must be some underlying emotion within a person to make them like that don't you think? "
Is it a form of !Attention Seeking” who knows, what I do know is, a minority on here like to be err, how can I put this, controversial, we always find avoiding them is our best policy |
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I think it's very easy to interpret a text based communication such as forums, texts and email incorrectly.
Often there is no context to take a comment that might have been made tongue in cheek and without a context it can appear offensive. At that point we are off on another shit slide to bitch oblivion!
Anyway I think you're all stupid apart from my clique so screw you!
Can I get an Amen cliquesters xxx  |
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"when people immediately try to put you down in order to make themselves look clever.
when they are antagonistic because you differ in your opinion from theirs and are therefore wrong.
this is when people come across as being paranoid and unfriendlyI would like to know, are you capable of being nice?"
have i ever been unpleasant to you?
i merely made a post that was intended to be firmly tongue in cheek.
it was misconstued by others who have since taken every opportunity to snipe at me.
in answer to your question most definately
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I dont like bitterness, Im more of a chilled lager man in the summer, and a red wine man in the winter
Constructive debates are often good but its the bitterness that is just so wrong at times.
Pour me a larger i'm parched."
You wanting some lime in that, or do you take it straight up? |
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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago
Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else |
"But your more on the sarcasm side not being offensive. "
That's true, or at least it is my intention that it's true.
However it still takes two to tango, and I definitely had my dancing shoes on. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When it takes so much effort though there must be some underlying emotion within a person to make them like that don't you think?
Is it a form of !Attention Seeking” who knows, what I do know is, a minority on here like to be err, how can I put this, controversial, we always find avoiding them is our best policy "
I think the avoidance thing is probably the best. Not always easy though for many to do. I also think than some may only get a reaction to comments if the comments are of a negative manner as they are harder to avoid.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"But your more on the sarcasm side not being offensive.
That's true, or at least it is my intention that it's true.
However it still takes two to tango, and I definitely had my dancing shoes on. "
Personally i like a little sarcasm, expectantly if there is whit with it. I don't think much of your dancing shoes though |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I dont like bitterness, Im more of a chilled lager man in the summer, and a red wine man in the winter
Constructive debates are often good but its the bitterness that is just so wrong at times.
Pour me a larger i'm parched.
You wanting some lime in that, or do you take it straight up? "
If i get a choice it would be red stripe in a tall glass |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I dont like bitterness, Im more of a chilled lager man in the summer, and a red wine man in the winter
Constructive debates are often good but its the bitterness that is just so wrong at times.
Pour me a larger i'm parched.
You wanting some lime in that, or do you take it straight up?
If i get a choice it would be red stripe in a tall glass "
Course you get a choice, what kinda fella do you take me for... you can have a pint of carling extra cold or not, lol  |
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"Is it just me or are others coming across more jealousy and bitterness these days on here. What makes someone end up becoming unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative?"
I wonder if it can be tiredness or stress that makes us more touchy. Maybe some had a busy weekend but more likely it stems from not having enough activity on a major bank holiday when people often feel more left out etc especially when they hear that others are having a great time.
Unfortunately we can't always notice when we are not quite feeling like our normal selves and end up letting ourselves down but of course some people just dont care. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I dont like bitterness, Im more of a chilled lager man in the summer, and a red wine man in the winter
Constructive debates are often good but its the bitterness that is just so wrong at times.
Pour me a larger i'm parched.
You wanting some lime in that, or do you take it straight up?
If i get a choice it would be red stripe in a tall glass
Course you get a choice, what kinda fella do you take me for... you can have a pint of carling extra cold or not, lol "
I will have to make do with that then won't I  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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when a person just see there side of things ,, its there way and there way only and dont have a open mind ... I think its a good thing we are not the same on sites like this what we experience here Swinging and stuff make us grow as people so i do keep a open mind myself..... when people are nasty i think i dont have to go down to there level I am better person. JO |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"when people are nasty i think i dont have to go down to there level I am better person. JO"
That is an trait i have to admire you on, i am trying to follow suit at times when i can. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think it's very easy to interpret a text based communication such as forums, texts and email incorrectly.
Often there is no context to take a comment that might have been made tongue in cheek and without a context it can appear offensive. At that point we are off on another shit slide to bitch oblivion!
Anyway I think you're all stupid apart from my clique so screw you!
Can I get an Amen cliquesters xxx "
Belated Amen to that, boss! |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
I personally think after all the threads going on on Sunday and the comments on them, then EVERYONE should look at how they post and how they come across.
I am not agreeing or disagreeing with any "side" ( at the moment it looks like sides) but the fact people brought up the posts says people are not happy.
Some of the posts were well put, a good many were just as bitchy as they were making out others were. (You can't be shouting " he /she is being bitchy about me" if you are coming across doing the same thing.)
Maybe a bit more tolerance on the forums of ALL members.
Funky, I think we need your line over here too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just me or are others coming across more jealousy and bitterness these days on here. What makes someone end up becoming unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative?"
They were never loved as children |
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"Is it just me or are others coming across more jealousy and bitterness these days on here. What makes someone end up becoming unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative?
They were never loved as children "
Isnt that illegal anyway?
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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago
glasgow |
forums are about differing opinions.or they wouldnt be forums.
i was on here on sunday,and 99% of what i read,was definitly,tounge in cheek,and the posts read that way.maybe if you read posts,looking for sniping ,or agression.you will find them.whether they are there or not. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just me or are others coming across more jealousy and bitterness these days on here. What makes someone end up becoming unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative?"
Dammit spelling mistake gremlins
Possibly the way others have treat them in the past ?
Sometimes, given the best will in the world, if people treat you like a twat often enough and long enough, eventually even the most calm, mild mannered person can turn bitter against the entire world.
There again your idea of unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative may be totally different to someone elses |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"when people are nasty i think i dont have to go down to there level I am better person. JO
That is an trait i have to admire you on, i am trying to follow suit at times when i can."
Its just in the passed i have seen how much joy some people get of hurting others with nasty words and stuff and thay get ofF on that ...... so i dont go down to there level i smile and think get a life ,, lol....... thay hate it, xx LOL so you keep smiling xx |
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People that hide behind a keyboard being nasty to people yet you know in real life they wouldnt say boo to a goose.
Those that are negative and aggressive as it makes them feel good and get attention. These people get of on getting attention whether positive or negative. Finally everyone else gets sick of them and ignores them.
People that spend their whole life whinging and whining how bad their life is and noone has had a worse life than them.
Lots of insecure people in the world that try and put on an internet persona of negativity and aggression.
Not for one minute saying that all insecure people are like this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
very good question but I can only answer from my own personal experiences, how some one would like to be popular because theyre unpopular is beyond me and I know myself I've turned people against me in the past and will probably do it again in the future from my comments, something I have found out though is some regular posters here are completely different in person, so does the forum create and alter ego? where one can be offensive, sarcastic but in person, are really very nice to be around. "
i'd like to think even if folk have a bump in the forums it's respected as a differing of opinions and I can't say I've noticed many that hold that grudge and continue it into other threads.
I think the internet is a forum in which people exploit their own anominity and indulge in saying things they wouldn't get away with publically and it can be quite cathargic.
it's the same whether discussing politics or sex, there's some things I will discuss via pm with guys that there's no way I would mention if i'd met them in a bar! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some people are fundamentally argumentative and that negativity comes across in what they post and that's what leads them to not meeting anyone. The circle continues and they become more and more negative. The last thing they want to see is everyone else getting on and having a good time that makes them feel even more excluded and isolated.
Great quote from Shawshank Redemption:
"Get busy living, or get busy dying." |
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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago
North of The Wall - youll need your vest |
"Some people are fundamentally argumentative and that negativity comes across in what they post and that's what leads them to not meeting anyone. The circle continues and they become more and more negative. The last thing they want to see is everyone else getting on and having a good time that makes them feel even more excluded and isolated.
Great quote from Shawshank Redemption:
"Get busy living, or get busy dying.""
Siren?? Is that you?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some people are fundamentally argumentative and that negativity comes across in what they post and that's what leads them to not meeting anyone. The circle continues and they become more and more negative. The last thing they want to see is everyone else getting on and having a good time that makes them feel even more excluded and isolated.
Great quote from Shawshank Redemption:
"Get busy living, or get busy dying."
Siren?? Is that you?? "
No, it's Wishy. Siren rarely uses the forums but when she does she'll say it's her to avoid any confusion. Hi hon. |
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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago
glasgow |
"Some people are fundamentally argumentative and that negativity comes across in what they post and that's what leads them to not meeting anyone. The circle continues and they become more and more negative. The last thing they want to see is everyone else getting on and having a good time that makes them feel even more excluded and isolated.
Great quote from Shawshank Redemption:
"Get busy living, or get busy dying."
Siren?? Is that you?? "
dont ask daft questions.who else could it be. |
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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago
North of The Wall - youll need your vest |
"
Siren?? Is that you??
No, it's Wishy. Siren rarely uses the forums but when she does she'll say it's her to avoid any confusion. Hi hon. "
I knowwwww that 
And hi to you too... |
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"Some people are fundamentally argumentative and that negativity comes across in what they post and that's what leads them to not meeting anyone. .... "
Get outta here lol
You know as well as I do, forum users are a minority. What we type on the forums has very little (if any) impact on how many people we can meet. If people are only fishing in the forums for meets they are casting their lines in a puddle. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just me or are others coming across more jealousy and bitterness these days on here. What makes someone end up becoming unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative?"
Dunno but i do wish it would bloody stop xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Life experience, upbringing, education etc. IMHO all play a part in forming a person's character.
Some end up optimistic, easy going and full of life, always see a glass as half full than half empty, and are more able to handle what may come their way, good or bad.
I honestly cannot remember a time when I am not a happy go lucky person, even when the chips are down, and I have had my fair share of rotten hands! |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
for as much bickering as there has been lately and yes there has been a bit... if you disagree with someones opinions on a subject there are a few people that like the run for the "victim" card awfully quickly..... which doesn't help the situation either.....
I was always taught that if I had an opinion then I better be ready to back it up with some sort of reasoning..... but hey, I came for a family full of strong women!
but hey... you get rid of me more from saturday... college football season starts.. then rolling into college basketball season....
see ya back in april!!!! |
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By *adchickCouple
over a year ago
Cyprus |
"
i was on here on sunday,and 99% of what i read,was definitly,tounge in cheek,and the posts read that way.maybe if you read posts,looking for sniping ,or agression.you will find them.whether they are there or not. "
You don't have to look for nastiness, sniping or agression to see it in alot of the threads being written currently and for it to hurt the people it, all be it apparently ironically, it is aimed at.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Is it just me or are others coming across more jealousy and bitterness these days on here. What makes someone end up becoming unpleasant/objectionable/argumentative?"
Some struggle for meets, then get frustrated and take it out on others. They wouldn't do it in real life for fear of being stood up to but there is safety behind a computer screen. I see it all as little sad and childish at times. |
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