FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you always insist on a social first or do you go straight into having sexual encounters?
Do you always insist on a social first or do you go straight into having sexual encounters?
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A social only isn’t always a must for me. I spend enough time getting to know them in various different ways, when it comes to arranging to meet, I have a pretty good idea of how we will get on and whether things are going to go further. |
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It states clearly on my profile that I insist on at least one social but back when I was meeting it was amazing the number of couples who assumed that meant straight to action on the same day.
Less than 10 percent of the 60 plus meets I've had over 9 years have gone beyond that initial social and the vast majority of those were my choice rather than theirs so as far as I'm concerned socials are an essential filter. |
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By *HUSH-Man 20 hours ago
London |
I’m a slow burn with my messages. Generally it’ll be at least a month of messaging before I decide to meet someone.
I’ll go for a social first but if we click I’ll go further on the same day with them.
I’ve never done something with a total stranger before, don’t plan to either.
That’s single women.
Couples I highly doubt I’ll meet again on my own. None have come close to being as good and respectful as the couple I already know. |
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"Has anyone had sex during a social. "
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Absolutely not. I don't think the sommelier 🍷 would be pleased if I started having sex on the leather banquette. A social is just that: a social. It's ålways a social first. |
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"Prefer a social however most guys don't they would rather jump straight to the action"
Not me. I prefer a social first. Never felt 100% right just getting straight down to it. I mean..I will if asked but I'd rather have a social first. |
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When I was meeting as a couple, it would depend on the situation. We had a meet where the whole purpose was for me to be fucked by a stranger so a social meet would have changed that dynamic. However, I know that the other half spent a long time chatting to them on the phone beforehand and I trusted him.
If it is just me meeting, then it will always be a social first. |
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"When I was meeting as a couple, it would depend on the situation. We had a meet where the whole purpose was for me to be fucked by a stranger so a social meet would have changed that dynamic. However, I know that the other half spent a long time chatting to them on the phone beforehand and I trusted him.
If it is just me meeting, then it will always be a social first. "
I have had straight sex meets when I've had a guy with me to look after me. On my own, no way. |
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Social first. Something could happen at the end of the social, or maybe not. Circumstances depending. I’m very much a vibes person, if we don’t gel, then the sex generally isn’t going to be as good for either of us x |
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I would always like to meet for a social first up to make sure that we are attracted to each other, although sometimes it just doesn't work out that way.
I did meet up with a couple once, after only chatting with them an hour previously.
I was very sceptical before meeting them but it ended up being a fantastic meet.
I don't know? sometimes I just like rolling the dice. The unknown can be very exciting. |
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I would have some kind of social first. Could be a conversation via messaging, or a meet (preferably) not if we clicked and then it led to more fairy enough. But would just arrange to turn up, do it then leave. Not really what does it for me but I do get that some others will find that that is exactly what they are after. Everyone is different and after different things |
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By *opeyXWoman 17 hours ago
Dundee |
"I always prefer socials first to see if we click and have chemistry and then we can have fun later on. That is just me.
What about the rest of you ladies and gents?"
Always a social first mostly for similar reasons. |
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It depends on what the other party wants to do. Normally only chat on video call then meet up. Only done one social and that's the only one where we didn't take it any further. All the others were amazing meetings. |
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I tend to chat for a good while before meeting, if I haven't scared them off, then we'll arrange something, usually a hotel. Drinks at the bar will count as the social before heading back to the room.
If I didn't live out in deadsville and had more time I'd do the social first thing  |
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By *ripfillMan 16 hours ago
Paris, New York, Hong Kong and Havant |
Social first … absolutely and I don’t mind buying the lunch /coffee/wine
But I think it is so important to make that connection first - and to have a conversation it’s nice !!
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We used to do social and if all clicked then play after if there was an opportunity but these days we rarely meet for socials as we are nearly always disappointed with the other couple, usually they are really nice but ‘exaggerated’ how young or slim they are.
We don’t meet single guys for socials as we found it far more exciting (and less work finding them ) spontaneous meets at clubs. |
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"We used to do social and if all clicked then play after if there was an opportunity but these days we rarely meet for socials as we are nearly always disappointed with the other couple, usually they are really nice but ‘exaggerated’ how young or slim they are.
We don’t meet single guys for socials as we found it far more exciting (and less work finding them ) spontaneous meets at clubs. "
Ah that makes sense. Whatever works for you |
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"I always prefer socials first to see if we click and have chemistry and then we can have fun later on. That is just me.
What about the rest of you ladies and gents?"
Social first , can always go for more if things go well  |
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"I always prefer socials first to see if we click and have chemistry and then we can have fun later on. That is just me.
What about the rest of you ladies and gents?"
I prefer a social first, but I'm not averse to a purely sexual encounter right off the bat. Sadly, an opportunity for the latter hasn't happened yet. |
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I’ve done both .. I actually prefer going straight for it .. there’s more fire in it , well for me there was.
Sometimes socials feel like a date and I’m not looking to date if you know what I mean. |
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By *bi HaiveMan 11 hours ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
Socials, whether I'm meeting alone or with a partner.
Even in clubs we like a good chat before diving in and make use of pre event chat groups to network, plenty of messages and off site text/phone/video chat.
That's not to say a social wouldn't progress to more straight away, but the thought of just diving straight in to sex isn't for me/us. |
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"Always a social first.. I find the idea of turning up to shag someone whose face I've never seen just bizarre. "
Amen to that , yes the social might move on quickly to a play meet , or it's a date in the diary
But no ones just turning up |
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