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In need of a forum virtual hug 🫂
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I'm hear to have a rant and not the way I intended to start a New Year!
It's taken years for me to build my confidence levels back up after I left my ex, that person completely destroyed me mentally! Tonight I received some messages from that person completely out of the blue and they have made me feel like absolute shite!  I'm not the type of person who can just shrug things off either, I'll be in a foul mood for days now 😔
So if there are any virtual hugs going spare? I would really appreciate them
Any others in the need of a virtual hug feel free to post! |
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By *ir tootMan 5 weeks ago
Burton-on-Trent |
"I'm hear to have a rant and not the way I intended to start a New Year!
It's taken years for me to build my confidence levels back up after I left my ex, that person completely destroyed me mentally! Tonight I received some messages from that person completely out of the blue and they have made me feel like absolute shite! I'm not the type of person who can just shrug things off either, I'll be in a foul mood for days now 😔
So if there are any virtual hugs going spare? I would really appreciate them
Any others in the need of a virtual hug feel free to post!"
Jesus come here and gets toots bar special premium hug. 🫂
That fucks sucks. |
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"
Tonight I received some messages from that person completely out of the blue and they have made me feel like absolute shite! I'm not the type of person who can just shrug things off either, I'll be in a foul mood for days now 😔 "
The only people who can hurt me with words alone are the people I genuinely care about; absolutely nobody else could hurt me with words no matter how hard they tried.
Offering a virtual hug but if they're going to bother you that much can't you just block them from contacting you via phone, email, social media etc? |
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Ex’s are the absolute worst. If they choose to attack, they know all the soft points and where you’re vulnerable. None of this says anything about you though, it’s all about them and their need to try and hurt you.
Sending you huge hugs and love. You’re so much better than they are |
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"I'm hear to have a rant and not the way I intended to start a New Year!
It's taken years for me to build my confidence levels back up after I left my ex, that person completely destroyed me mentally! Tonight I received some messages from that person completely out of the blue and they have made me feel like absolute shite! I'm not the type of person who can just shrug things off either, I'll be in a foul mood for days now 😔
So if there are any virtual hugs going spare? I would really appreciate them
Any others in the need of a virtual hug feel free to post!"
Hey
Please take this in the context i mean it in the best way !
But THEYRE an EX
Fuck what they’ve said
You shouldn’t care what they think
What they do
Or what they say 
You have more about you than they’ll ever deserve
FUCK IT
ITS A NEW YEAR
Go make the best year out of it and show them they missed out  |
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Big hugs to you OP.
If this person knows what they have done to you to make you feel the way you do then I'd say their message tonight was calculated and should be forgotten pronto, they'd want to get to you so don't let them. I hope you've managed to forget them and enjoy the start of a new year ❤️ |
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They know what makes you tick, know there words will deeply affect you. Just a form of control & abuse sounds like your better off away from it cut the toxicity out completely sending a hug I’ve been there with an ex who knew how to mentally manipulate |
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It can take you back when you hear from them again but try not to focus too much on it. Focus on how far you've come and the person you are now and that person doesn't engage, blocks and keeps moving forward. We gave these people too much power when we were with them, don't give it too them once you've found your peace  |
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"I'm hear to have a rant and not the way I intended to start a New Year!
It's taken years for me to build my confidence levels back up after I left my ex, that person completely destroyed me mentally! Tonight I received some messages from that person completely out of the blue and they have made me feel like absolute shite! I'm not the type of person who can just shrug things off either, I'll be in a foul mood for days now 😔
So if there are any virtual hugs going spare? I would really appreciate them
Any others in the need of a virtual hug feel free to post!"
Oh lovely I'm so sorry this person has been a twat to you. Can you block them from messaging?,sending big hugs xx |
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By (user no longer on site) 5 weeks ago
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I have an ex that can do this with just one message. It's easy to say to just forget it, harder to do. But you know the best way I've found of saying fuck you, is to just ignore and get on with being you. That will piss them off more than anything.
🫂 |
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"I'm hear to have a rant and not the way I intended to start a New Year!
It's taken years for me to build my confidence levels back up after I left my ex, that person completely destroyed me mentally! Tonight I received some messages from that person completely out of the blue and they have made me feel like absolute shite! I'm not the type of person who can just shrug things off either, I'll be in a foul mood for days now 😔
So if there are any virtual hugs going spare? I would really appreciate them
Any others in the need of a virtual hug feel free to post!"
I'm really sorry to hear. The best thing we can do re people who have caused us such trauma is to cut them out completely, leaving no avenue for further contact (provided no children are involved).
Sending big hugs and wishing you a happy and productive 2025.
S |
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By *avexxMan 5 weeks ago
cheshire |
"I have an ex that can do this with just one message. It's easy to say to just forget it, harder to do. But you know the best way I've found of saying fuck you, is to just ignore and get on with being you. That will piss them off more than anything.
🫂"
,,, exactly this |
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Sorry to hear NL! If you don't need this person in your life (and it seems like you don't), then cut them out. Surround yourself with people that respect, cherish, love and VALUE you....brings so much more peace.
You are beautiful.
Sending hugs x |
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Really sorry to hear this, it can feel like it puts us back so far.
Words or actions from an ex can hurt because it can take us right back to being in a bad relationship. Just like hearing a song can instantly take us back to when we first heard it, emotions are the fastest time machine ever. It also takes us straight back to the emotions we felt at the time, so with an ex it might be frustration, anger, or the unfairness of it. That’s why it’s so powerful.
Someone cleverer than me said there are only two things you can change: what you say and what you do. You can’t change anything else, especially not someone else’s behaviour so don’t bother about that; it’s like getting annoyed at it raining.
Changing what you do is how you react to things, and that’s absolutely in your control, although depending on the past it’s not always easy. Achievable though.
As said by others, this person is an ex. They might still be a part of your life for kids or something, but you need to remind yourself their words can hurt less now.
Take some time to look at it rationally, their words don’t have to hurt as they did and know that you’re on the path to them hurting even less in future.
They will keep doing their ranty shit, but it’s like they’re now not in front of you but they’re just on the screen of an old TV set. That TV is an old black and white portable, and it’s moving gradually further away from you, the arial is losing the signal a bit and the screen is going fuzzy as it also gets smaller going away from you. That’s the image of them and so it has less and less effect on you.
You can get through this, trust me. |
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Emotional abusers are the absolute worst, they know exactly what triggers you.
In my journey of recovery I journalled the triggers she did and slowly desensitised myself to them. The day I took away her power was the day I was reborn, knowing she couldn't hurt me again. Ever. I was in control, not her and I cut all ties completely. Blocked all possible ways of contact across all platforms.
Sending some bear hugs lovely x |
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"I'm hear to have a rant and not the way I intended to start a New Year!
It's taken years for me to build my confidence levels back up after I left my ex, that person completely destroyed me mentally! Tonight I received some messages from that person completely out of the blue and they have made me feel like absolute shite! I'm not the type of person who can just shrug things off either, I'll be in a foul mood for days now 😔
So if there are any virtual hugs going spare? I would really appreciate them
Any others in the need of a virtual hug feel free to post!"
Awwww bless you. Come here. Arms out. Mmmm that’s better. Love cuddles.
Block his number. Don’t reply. Don’t engage. That’s what he wants. |
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This is really sad and it’s shitty that someone would do that to someone, especially at a time when 99% of folk are focused on gratitude and showing love and positive energy.
You’re deffo getting a big hug the next time I see you 🫂 |
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There is a reason that person is in your past.
They are most definitely not good enough, or deserving enough of your headspace, emotions or tears, even if of rage.
If you are able to block them, do it. If not rename them in your address book ... Twatty-McTwatface (actually that's probably Nick's new name...but you get the idea)
Some really great posts above which I hope bring comfort...I noted the one about choice, which is super powerful - We CHOOSE to be happy...we CHOOSE to be unhappy. Sure, the initial contact is a shock, but don't let your mood be governed by someone who no longer holds significance in your life. Delete the message if you haven't already, the imagine transferring the words onto a piece of paper and then burn it, watching the pieces break down and turn to ash, lost forever...in the words of that stupid Disney film 'let it ho, let it go, let it go' ...if you sing it, it will put a smile on your face and that briefly will bring happiness to build on.
We love you, you've got this. Kick ass biaaatch 💕💋
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"I'm hear to have a rant and not the way I intended to start a New Year!
It's taken years for me to build my confidence levels back up after I left my ex, that person completely destroyed me mentally! Tonight I received some messages from that person completely out of the blue and they have made me feel like absolute shite! I'm not the type of person who can just shrug things off either, I'll be in a foul mood for days now 😔
So if there are any virtual hugs going spare? I would really appreciate them
Any others in the need of a virtual hug feel free to post!"
So sorry to hear this, OP. We know what that’s like, and it’s shit. Really shit.
Sending double hugs your way xx |
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"I'm hear to have a rant and not the way I intended to start a New Year!
It's taken years for me to build my confidence levels back up after I left my ex, that person completely destroyed me mentally! Tonight I received some messages from that person completely out of the blue and they have made me feel like absolute shite! I'm not the type of person who can just shrug things off either, I'll be in a foul mood for days now 😔
So if there are any virtual hugs going spare? I would really appreciate them
Any others in the need of a virtual hug feel free to post!"
Sending you hugs if you was closer I would give you a real hug just hold you let you cry no words would be needed just my arms holding you as you croed |
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"I'm hear to have a rant and not the way I intended to start a New Year!
It's taken years for me to build my confidence levels back up after I left my ex, that person completely destroyed me mentally! Tonight I received some messages from that person completely out of the blue and they have made me feel like absolute shite! I'm not the type of person who can just shrug things off either, I'll be in a foul mood for days now 😔
So if there are any virtual hugs going spare? I would really appreciate them
Any others in the need of a virtual hug feel free to post!"
Sending as many virtual hugs 🫂 as I can. We all need a hug from time to time and I hope you can start to feel better soon knowing that we all care.
All good wishes for 2025. |
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By *sWyldWoman 5 weeks ago
Edinburgh |
"Ex’s are the absolute worst. If they choose to attack, they know all the soft points and where you’re vulnerable. None of this says anything about you though, it’s all about them and their need to try and hurt you.
Sending you huge hugs and love. You’re so much better than they are"
This...
They aren't worth your head space |
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By *eliWoman 5 weeks ago
. |
Ach Nympha. Sending you love and virtual hugs in lieu of the real ones you'll get before too long.
It's easy enough to say they don't deserve your headspace but if they do occupy it? For a little bit? That's okay. You can take the time to process, rediscover and remember the amazing woman you are. I hope in time their messages hurt less and you're able to give them the lack of headspace they deserve. ❤️ |
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By *avinaTVTV/TS 5 weeks ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
"I'm hear to have a rant and not the way I intended to start a New Year!
It's taken years for me to build my confidence levels back up after I left my ex, that person completely destroyed me mentally! Tonight I received some messages from that person completely out of the blue and they have made me feel like absolute shite! I'm not the type of person who can just shrug things off either, I'll be in a foul mood for days now 😔
So if there are any virtual hugs going spare? I would really appreciate them
Any others in the need of a virtual hug feel free to post!"
Have a massive hug sweety!
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By *ags73Man 5 weeks ago
glasgow-ish |
"Sending all the hugs you need, your a super strong woman don't let that prick back in to your head he deserves not another single thought delete and block him, you got this please don't feel bad "
100% what a prick |
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