FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > I'd have sex
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"Your tits are so massive that I would be at risk of severe head concussion if they were to swing my way!" I can’t play the glockenspiel with my vagina | |||
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"Your tits are so massive that I would be at risk of severe head concussion if they were to swing my way! I can’t play the glockenspiel with my vagina" It would be too much goth for one bed | |||
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"I'd have sex with you but..... Why wouldn't you have sex with the poster above (funny answers only) x" I'd have sex with op, but my cock is to small | |||
"I'd have sex with you but..... Why wouldn't you have sex with the poster above (funny answers only) x I'd have sex with op, but my cock is to small " You are a man person. | |||
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"I'm a giver not a receiver " You're too far away...Mrs L-C | |||
"I'm a giver not a receiver You're too far away...Mrs L-C" Bambi won’t let me | |||
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"I'm a giver not a receiver You're too far away...Mrs L-C" But my dick isn't able to cross the Irish sea, that I don't do catholic/protestants (delete as appropriate) | |||
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"…..but you’d need a bigger bike! " You have a marmite stained rusty tea towel holder instead of a minge. | |||
"…..but you’d need a bigger bike! You have a marmite stained rusty tea towel holder instead of a minge." I would but I'd have to bash my hand with a hammer so as it could service a hole such as yours | |||
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"I would have sex with you... But giant penguins fried too much bacon at the last scout jamboree in Malabo. And they were wearing light up Healeys. Tut tut." Sadly I can’t have sex with you because I suspect your just after my werthers originals | |||
"Sadly I can’t have sex with you because I suspect your just after my werthers originals " Dammit!!! Foiled again! | |||
"Sadly I can’t have sex with you because I suspect your just after my werthers originals Dammit!!! Foiled again!" The werthers are in my pants… help yourself!! | |||
"Sadly I can’t have sex with you because I suspect your just after my werthers originals Dammit!!! Foiled again! The werthers are in my pants… help yourself!! " I would but, he has werthers stuck to his willy, I don't like werthers | |||
"Sadly I can’t have sex with you because I suspect your just after my werthers originals Dammit!!! Foiled again! The werthers are in my pants… help yourself!! I would but, he has werthers stuck to his willy, I don't like werthers " Because she don’t like werthers | |||
"Sadly I can’t have sex with you because I suspect your just after my werthers originals Dammit!!! Foiled again! The werthers are in my pants… help yourself!! I would but, he has werthers stuck to his willy, I don't like werthers " I like Werthers, but I don't like willies... | |||
"Sadly I can’t have sex with you because I suspect your just after my werthers originals Dammit!!! Foiled again! The werthers are in my pants… help yourself!! I would but, he has werthers stuck to his willy, I don't like werthers " Imagine trying to peel a sticky werthers off my willy, painful! | |||
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"Because one eyed snakes aren't my thing 😜" Because he takes more photos of himself than me! 😜🤣 | |||
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"I’d have sex with you but that would be effort... " But you've hidden yourself so well | |||
"I’d have sex with you but that would be effort... But you've hidden yourself so well" I'd have sex with your missus, but you forgot the chaat masala | |||
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"I’d have sex with you but that would be effort... But you've hidden yourself so well" I don’t like sweet and spicy…..bitter and murky is more my taste | |||
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"I'd have sex with you, but I prefer a multi-tool. " I'd be worried about the bath boiling dry while we fucked leading to the discovery of delicious salt at the bottom | |||
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"But gingers are too kinky for me!" He misses leg day, far too much of a lightweight for me!! | |||
"But gingers are too kinky for me!" You skip leg day | |||
"But gingers are too kinky for me! You skip leg day " I don't have the girth | |||
"But gingers are too kinky for me! You skip leg day I don't have the girth" You look a lot better than me | |||
"But gingers are too kinky for me! You skip leg day I don't have the girth You look a lot better than me" Wearing a hat during sex can be off putting | |||
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"They turned up d*unk, had a wee on the cat and then Mrs fanny farted the national anthem whilst eating cheeto’s" Your bum looks better in pants than mine | |||
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"You gave me the wrong bloody postcode " I gave him my postcode, got my best blue undies on and he didn't turn up. | |||
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"Someone didn't look carefully enough at their hotdog so it's no longer possible" Those pink gloves would contrast with my skin | |||
"Someone didn't look carefully enough at their hotdog so it's no longer possible Those pink gloves would contrast with my skin " The emoji scares me Mrs | |||
"Someone didn't look carefully enough at their hotdog so it's no longer possible Those pink gloves would contrast with my skin The emoji scares me Mrs " I wouldn’t want to break your coffee table | |||
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"….I appear to have misplaced my penis…. 😕" I've not unfortunately had 999 sensual lovers, sorry. | |||
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"I'm not sure who to take first." He has a real penis I prefer the strap on variety | |||
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"I am worried you may actually turn up with the purple devil's head instead of your own. " Those Claws are making my Vampires jealous | |||
"You have traumatised that teddy bear" Its a puppet | |||
"You have traumatised that teddy bearIts a puppet " I don’t like mustard 😂 | |||