 |
By (user no longer on site) OP 20 weeks ago
|
I genuinely expected more of us to feel desirable, especially considering where we are!
Let's flip the coin - When you look at someone else, what gives you that strong feeling / urge of desire?
What makes someone desirable to you?? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP 20 weeks ago
|
For me, it's the confidence in the way someone holds themselves and then great eye gaze, especially if it's slightly challenging... Or a twinkle in the eye
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *hilloutMan 20 weeks ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
Differs from person to person.
It can be the eyes, smile, face. Physical appearance. Sometimes it's more the personality, or a combination of various little details.
Sometimes it's a bit of that "je ne sais quoi", being something you can't quite explain. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Personality, of course..
But also, that latent sexuality that someone has.. When every part of their body ripples with a sexual presence that leads you to imagining exactly what you’d be doing with them given the opportunity..
some people just ooze sex appeal and sexual tension.
Sometimes without even realising it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Many different factors determine desirability to me.
Attractiveness, confidence, intelligence, a compatible sense of humour, cleanliness; the way a lady carries herself, her sense of style etc.
It is the combination of the aforementioned traits that aggregate to draw my attention
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Different things in different people make me desire them. A playful humour, a mischievous glint in the eye, a masterful way with words, beautiful collarbones, a swoon-worthy smile....
Finding someone attractive and to having it returned takes it to another level. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Many different factors can come into it.
Visually, I need attraction and mentally.
Visually can be anything, need to be confident, nice eyes, cheeky smile, a good bum  etc and mentally personality, someone who can make me laugh, smile.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Eyes, hair , cheekbones , teeth , shape.
As much as I’d love to say personality , I have desired people with really bad ones & good ones tend to end up as FWB’s rather that that primal lust that makes you a little crazy ! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *8on33Man 20 weeks ago
winfrith |
"I genuinely expected more of us to feel desirable, especially considering where we are!
Let's flip the coin - When you look at someone else, what gives you that strong feeling / urge of desire?
What makes someone desirable to you?? "
Your vid in the black imitation leather dress can I ask what that tune is ? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *8on33Man 20 weeks ago
winfrith |
"I genuinely expected more of us to feel desirable, especially considering where we are!
Let's flip the coin - When you look at someone else, what gives you that strong feeling / urge of desire?
What makes someone desirable to you?? Your vid in the black imitation leather dress can I ask what that tune is ?"
It inspired me anyways |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 20 weeks ago
|
How they act with me - I have zero interest in chase me chase me types. Engage me, lock my eyes in and tell me you want me without telling me you want me and I'll be 100% all in.
So a combination of confidence, eyes, looks and the allure. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I’m not in the right frame of mind yet to find somebody desirable… but I can appreciate them aesthetically or find something about them attractive… but that’s very much something I can’t put my finger on, something behind the eyes  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It's hard to pin it, but a combination of things. The way they carry themselves, their smile, their confidence.
But most importantly, you click with them. The conversations are effortless "
Some called me out for this and it got me thinking.
I can fancy someone and appreciate they're hot, but I can't desire them without interaction. Desire is much more raw and primal. I want to pin them up against the wall, rip their clothes off and throw them on the bed. If I think they're a bit of an arse, it's the biggest turn off for me and I'll never desire them.
Am I alone in this? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *agatoXXXMan 20 weeks ago
Gone and completely forgotten. |
"I genuinely expected more of us to feel desirable, especially considering where we are!
Let's flip the coin - When you look at someone else, what gives you that strong feeling / urge of desire?
What makes someone desirable to you?? "
Green lingerie.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 20 weeks ago
|
Great question, Midnight.
For me I’m going to separate the answers into two categories, one here on fab my and how my desire might manifest in terms of what I see on fab and then two, is that in real life to see or meet somebody in a bar club and then feel the desire from the Beginning.
1) Firstly; with on being on fab, what of things that I look for on fab would be an seeing an immediate sense of honesty, wanting to be I dialogue, to want be in conversation is the desire to have a a conversational relationship at that point.
I’m not really in for whether somebody looks hot or not, or care much of the colour of their eyes, or the colour of their lingerie; sure it might help but not necessarily be a deciding factor for me.
You know if I can progress somebody to having coffee which is important to me in my mind, is to say actually I think I might like this person then the sooner that is the better for me.
2) second one for me is about when I meet somebody how it manifests, when in person almost on every event in my life when I’ve met somebody that I felt strongly, in that emotive way that stirs up the fire within; it’s always been two / three things (1) strong eye contact with (2) very clear unambiguous flirtation, I don’t pick up on subtle signs and signals. I’m naive to it. I always have been and I can’t deny that so unless it’s absolutely clear and transparent that you like me then I would not be able to to pick up on subtle at all, even in terms of written. the (3) third one for me is about physical touch with that emotional connection. The want for me to touch somebody hold somebody is an indicator that I’m feeling the desire in terms of wherever that goes, Let the flaming begin. 
NB: this was a voice transcription and is subject to errors. I just didn’t have the time to craft it. I made minor edits.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It's hard to pin it, but a combination of things. The way they carry themselves, their smile, their confidence.
But most importantly, you click with them. The conversations are effortless
Some called me out for this and it got me thinking.
I can fancy someone and appreciate they're hot, but I can't desire them without interaction. Desire is much more raw and primal. I want to pin them up against the wall, rip their clothes off and throw them on the bed. If I think they're a bit of an arse, it's the biggest turn off for me and I'll never desire them.
Am I alone in this?"
Most definitely not alone. Even fancying someone on a superficial level is an impossibility if I don't find their personality appealing. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I genuinely expected more of us to feel desirable, especially considering where we are!
Let's flip the coin - When you look at someone else, what gives you that strong feeling / urge of desire?
What makes someone desirable to you?? "
Nothing, because I don't feel desire.
I used to, many years ago, when I was beholden to my emotions and hormones I guess. And not just internally, but from advertising and the like.
.
Then I had a sort of epiphany and thought to myself, "Why are these external factors and also internal hormonal factors triggering me ?" and I realised it's because I allow them to.
.
And I rationalised that I didn't like being manipulated by these external factors and situations. I would decide what I would allow to affect me, not the other way around.
.
I guess it's like Pavlov's dogs learning not to salivate when the bell was rung. The stimulus might occur, but the response is considered, not spontaneous or without the direction of will and intent.
.
Which is a long-winded way of saying, "There is nothing another person can do to provoke desire. I will decide on the merit and response at the time." |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Desire is probably too strong a word, but there's an essence of style that gets my attention, something that exudes a kind of nuanced expression of their sexuality. An inference of self-acceptance and openness to experience.
Then I feel like that's someone I'd want to have a conversation with, whether it becomes sexual or not. It gives me a sense that there's a potential for desire. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
For me her overall countenance usually wins me over, a confident and kindly smile, conveying an aura of assuredness but without coming across as aloof. Some people exude natural charm that simply cannot be explained. They glow. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) 20 weeks ago
|
Several things can, a bit like cooking. It has to be the right mix of the ingredients for it to work. And just because a person has some of those ingredients, doesn't mean the Soufflé is gonna rise |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It's not a physical thing for me. If I fancy someone I will find physical characteristics that I find arousing, but it's someone engaging, where I love chatting to them, that I will fancy. Once my interest is fully engaged the rest follows on. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I genuinely expected more of us to feel desirable, especially considering where we are!
Let's flip the coin - When you look at someone else, what gives you that strong feeling / urge of desire?
What makes someone desirable to you?? "
When I talk to the person for a long time learn about them opinions and more. And how they present themselves
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It's hard to pin it, but a combination of things. The way they carry themselves, their smile, their confidence.
But most importantly, you click with them. The conversations are effortless
Some called me out for this and it got me thinking.
I can fancy someone and appreciate they're hot, but I can't desire them without interaction. Desire is much more raw and primal. I want to pin them up against the wall, rip their clothes off and throw them on the bed. If I think they're a bit of an arse, it's the biggest turn off for me and I'll never desire them.
Am I alone in this?"
Nope. I agree 100%
There are things like eyes & a smile that I find attractive. A voice may make me tingle.
But it’s 100% personality and that it factor that sets off true desire.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"It's hard to pin it, but a combination of things. The way they carry themselves, their smile, their confidence.
But most importantly, you click with them. The conversations are effortless
Some called me out for this and it got me thinking.
I can fancy someone and appreciate they're hot, but I can't desire them without interaction. Desire is much more raw and primal. I want to pin them up against the wall, rip their clothes off and throw them on the bed. If I think they're a bit of an arse, it's the biggest turn off for me and I'll never desire them.
Am I alone in this?
Nope. I agree 100%
There are things like eyes & a smile that I find attractive. A voice may make me tingle.
But it’s 100% personality and that it factor that sets off true desire.
"
I'm going to go back to this person and tell them to take back what they called me. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We both love cute faces, it’s the main requirement for chicks.
Handsome, tall bearded guys for H.
Attitude is key though, if he/she dances like they have no other thought in their head we’re melting with desire.
You can tell everything about the potential by the way they dance. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"We both love cute faces, it’s the main requirement for chicks.
Handsome, tall bearded guys for H.
Attitude is key though, if he/she dances like they have no other thought in their head we’re melting with desire.
You can tell everything about the potential by the way they dance."
You put your left leg in, your left leg out... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"We both love cute faces, it’s the main requirement for chicks.
Handsome, tall bearded guys for H.
Attitude is key though, if he/she dances like they have no other thought in their head we’re melting with desire.
You can tell everything about the potential by the way they dance.
You put your left leg in, your left leg out..."
I don’t remember that …. But I did turn around to finish my beer at one point  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP 20 weeks ago
|
"It's hard to pin it, but a combination of things. The way they carry themselves, their smile, their confidence.
But most importantly, you click with them. The conversations are effortless
Some called me out for this and it got me thinking.
I can fancy someone and appreciate they're hot, but I can't desire them without interaction. Desire is much more raw and primal. I want to pin them up against the wall, rip their clothes off and throw them on the bed. If I think they're a bit of an arse, it's the biggest turn off for me and I'll never desire them.
Am I alone in this?
Nope. I agree 100%
There are things like eyes & a smile that I find attractive. A voice may make me tingle.
But it’s 100% personality and that it factor that sets off true desire.
"
I am in agreement with this too |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"We both love cute faces, it’s the main requirement for chicks.
Handsome, tall bearded guys for H.
Attitude is key though, if he/she dances like they have no other thought in their head we’re melting with desire.
You can tell everything about the potential by the way they dance.
You put your left leg in, your left leg out...
I don’t remember that …. But I did turn around to finish my beer at one point "
Well leg is a bit of an exaggeration  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I genuinely expected more of us to feel desirable, especially considering where we are!
Let's flip the coin - When you look at someone else, what gives you that strong feeling / urge of desire?
What makes someone desirable to you?? "
Good pics, confidence, dom vibes, into kink, interesting profile. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"They need to capture my mind
Easy.
Henriette is a Jedi, did you know?
I didn't know but that still leaves you Sam
I’m just in it for your body.
Honesty’s the best policy and all that
Send nudes  "
Dear God I'm flushed after that |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"We both love cute faces, it’s the main requirement for chicks.
Handsome, tall bearded guys for H.
Attitude is key though, if he/she dances like they have no other thought in their head we’re melting with desire.
You can tell everything about the potential by the way they dance."
Well shit, I have zero potential then  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"We both love cute faces, it’s the main requirement for chicks.
Handsome, tall bearded guys for H.
Attitude is key though, if he/she dances like they have no other thought in their head we’re melting with desire.
You can tell everything about the potential by the way they dance."
I dance Salsa
There's something amazingly sexy about a woman who can dance, and is unafraid to show her moves |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"We both love cute faces, it’s the main requirement for chicks.
Handsome, tall bearded guys for H.
Attitude is key though, if he/she dances like they have no other thought in their head we’re melting with desire.
You can tell everything about the potential by the way they dance.
I dance Salsa
There's something amazingly sexy about a woman who can dance, and is unafraid to show her moves"
I like it when they can lead. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eliWoman 20 weeks ago
. |
I can think someone's attractive quite easily. Fancy someone when I get to know them a little bit, we have some form of friendship and I think about kissing them.
But desire? It's a far stronger emotion for me. Lust is the more primal, sexual need for another, that sort of I've got to have you now feeling.
Desire is... softer. It's tied with affection, it's when I want to express it both emotionally and physically. There's a myriad of factors that contribute to it - the delight I take in listening to someone, not just their voice but what they're saying. It's how I can find myself almost craving their touch again and thinking about them long after we've said goodbye. It's who the person is, their personality that has me wanting to know even more of them. Learn them. It's how they feel pressed against me, that physical touch, even through a hug.
It's also found in the written word. That skill with language. How they make me feel. How I make them feel. When I know it's reciprocated, when they openly flirt and also openly communicate.
That's when I really desire someone.
Lust? She's easily found within me but desire is rare. More treasured. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *anae21Woman 20 weeks ago
Nearer than you think |
Voice.
Attraction is easy and predictable, but when he speaks and his conversation draws me in; his timbre is low, he almost growls when he leans in to kiss, then he is truly desirable.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *HUSH-Man 20 weeks ago
London |
There’s no one specific thing that makes someone desirable to me. It’s usually something that just strikes me about them. Visually it might be their eyes or their lips. Sometimes it’s their body. Beautiful skin, all types. Hair also gets me going. I have a huge crush on one of the women who works at my local Waterstones. She was looking up a book for me at the computer and casually flicked her long hair over to one side to stop it from getting in her way. My reaction
That being said all desire can and does go out the window for me if you’re a bad person who just tries to bring others down. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I genuinely expected more of us to feel desirable, especially considering where we are!
Let's flip the coin - When you look at someone else, what gives you that strong feeling / urge of desire?
What makes someone desirable to you?? "
Thare are many beautiful women in the world, many faces and bodies I can appreciate in the abstract. But to feel actual desire for a person there's got to be something more.
If I'm chatting to them in Fab DMs or text messages, then it's the relaxed connection established between our words that makes me feel able to say anything to them as we flirt, and their use of language to light up my imagination and fill my mind with the most erotic of thoughts.
In person, it's when their beauty melts and becomes something warm rather than icy, the lively look around the eyes, the seductive smile that offers me a welcome, an invitation to her charms - which doesn't mean anything sexual will happen, just that I am to be allowed a relaxed intimacy. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I think it's the chemistry that makes me desire someone. I look and chat with many men I find attractive, but to desire them requires a little bit of lust between the two of us. A beautiful man sat and played his guitar for my eyes only a while ago and the desire I felt in that moment was unbelievable. I need a spark, a connection we share. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think it's the chemistry that makes me desire someone. I look and chat with many men I find attractive, but to desire them requires a little bit of lust between the two of us. A beautiful man sat and played his guitar for my eyes only a while ago and the desire I felt in that moment was unbelievable. I need a spark, a connection we share. "
Yes, for me desire means their is something already there. Be it lust, affection, compatiblity, friendship, desire can be an evolution of all or some of these combined.
Once the foundation is set, desire can come from anything. At the moment it's his hands as I like the control and pleasure they give. That has been sparking my desire lately. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I don't think I have one thing that is consistent across people. Some it will be their eyes; some it will be the way they smile; some it will be that they're wearing. Others it will just be an unknown - like the mythical x-factor. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think it's the chemistry that makes me desire someone. I look and chat with many men I find attractive, but to desire them requires a little bit of lust between the two of us. A beautiful man sat and played his guitar for my eyes only a while ago and the desire I felt in that moment was unbelievable. I need a spark, a connection we share. "
If you heard me play guitar you'd run a mile |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
