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By (user no longer on site) 27 weeks ago
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If my partner (if I had one) had an orgasm… I hope she would text me and let me know.
If a guy hasn’t given her an orgasm every hour in the hour does he even care about her needs? |
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I don't orgasm with new meets, I totally understand women can and do find it difficult so no it doesn't bother me if I or they don't as long as they enjoy themselves.
The orgasm isn't the be all and end all of sex, it's kinda annoying especially from guys who make it their only goal. |
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By *ea monkey OP Man 27 weeks ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I don't orgasm with new meets, I totally understand women can and do find it difficult so no it doesn't bother me if I or they don't as long as they enjoy themselves.
The orgasm isn't the be all and end all of sex, it's kinda annoying especially from guys who make it their only goal."
I tend to agree, I think it’s about communication and understanding the other person as well |
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I very much love to provide an orgasm - it gives me a wondrous sense of achievement and makes me feel veritably awesome; much like whenever I have a shave and hear the Gillette song in my head: ‘Gillette, the best a man can geee-eeeettt.’
‘Tis a most glorious day indeed
 |
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"Tbh if she no cum it’s pointless , it gets me off as much as myself getting off , but there are all different dynamics and tastes
So if we met, I wouldn't cum, so it would be a pointless fuck? "
Look I'd anyone is in need of pointless fucks I'll reluctantly raise my hand |
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By *eliWoman 27 weeks ago
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It really depends on who they are, something I'd like to think (and I do tend to) I'd know beforehand.
Sometimes people find it difficult to, especially that first time with someone new. It could be a sensory overload, too exciting, they're a bit nervous. That's absolutely fine. It happens. I love kissing and grinding/dryhumping and as long as that's temporarily sated I'm happy. Sex is about so much more than the orgasm and when you chase it... it doesn't really go according to plan.
If it's someone like me who comes very easily and frequently... that first time I wouldn't mind. Dates after I might try and bring it up with them gently at some point.
It's not something I've experienced though so these are all hypothetical musings. |
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By *mf123Man 27 weeks ago
with one foot out the door |
As a collector of multiple supergasms id lose intrest once on the job i have targets to reach in my mind that if iv not getten into her head enough that she cant let go properly iv already failed |
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"Tbh if she no cum it’s pointless , it gets me off as much as myself getting off , but there are all different dynamics and tastes "
You see I hate this thought process. Sex isn't just about having an orgasm, it's just so much more. Trying hard to make a man/woman cum just puts pressure on and takes away so much fun and enjoyment. |
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"Tbh if she no cum it’s pointless , it gets me off as much as myself getting off , but there are all different dynamics and tastes
You see I hate this thought process. Sex isn't just about having an orgasm, it's just so much more. Trying hard to make a man/woman cum just puts pressure on and takes away so much fun and enjoyment."
Totally with you on this. |
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By *ea monkey OP Man 27 weeks ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"Tbh if she no cum it’s pointless , it gets me off as much as myself getting off , but there are all different dynamics and tastes
You see I hate this thought process. Sex isn't just about having an orgasm, it's just so much more. Trying hard to make a man/woman cum just puts pressure on and takes away so much fun and enjoyment."
I completely agree. I often have issues achieving orgasm, especially with new partners and it can become a very negative experience if someone is focused on that |
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I'm very sexually responsive, so orgasming is a done-deal for me, being just a matter of how many rather than "if".
What bothers me a little is when I see guys who are seriously into the spanking scene, and with some of them, it's more about building up memories to toss off over later on. While it works for them, it's a little awkward/disappointing for me that they hold off cumming and are more into the spanking side.
Guys who are in it strictly for sex have me racking up a good 6-7 orgasms, but I'm happy that they just blow them load right at that end. One guy I see is a repeater, so even better!  |
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By *ea monkey OP Man 27 weeks ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"I'm very sexually responsive, so orgasming is a done-deal for me, being just a matter of how many rather than "if".
What bothers me a little is when I see guys who are seriously into the spanking scene, and with some of them, it's more about building up memories to toss off over later on. While it works for them, it's a little awkward/disappointing for me that they hold off cumming and are more into the spanking side.
Guys who are in it strictly for sex have me racking up a good 6-7 orgasms, but I'm happy that they just blow them load right at that end. One guy I see is a repeater, so even better! "
So the guy cumming is very important to you? Why? |
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A couple of years ago I was playing with a lady who found it difficult to orgasm, it took a few meetings actually before she reached one. I learned quite a lot from that encounter, orgasms aren't the only important thing for all ladies.
Sure they are for some, and it's still an important part of play most times, but I'm no longer quite as hung up on it as I used to be.
BTW, once she had one orgasm, the lady in question found it much easier to cum in future, I guess we both learned a bit about her triggers from the previous few plays. |
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I tend to try and make sure they have cum a few times before I do, I'm not into a quickie unless I have known
them a while. I've only met one person who didn't cum when we met and it wasn't for trying. We had a good time but we never met again. Rightly or wrongly I assumed we weren't on the same page. It turned out I was right as I'm
only really interested in repeat meets that will lead to fwb and she wasn't. |
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Sometimes I can struggle to orgasm with someone new, a combination of not being fully relaxed and nerves I would guess. It doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy sex. Equally I’ve been with someone that occasionally struggled to cum, for no particular reason. We’d usually just have a giggle about it and not stress over it. I knew he had a good time and vice versa.
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"So the guy cumming is very important to you? Why? "
It shows that he's enjoyed himself, and that I've been hitting the right notes with him. It's not ego, more being concerned about people-pleasing. |
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If I’m allowed a little tangent …
When I was a much younger man, I’d arranged to meet a wonderful older woman for sex. (In her daughter’s vacant student flat during the summer, no less.) Things were coming to a head, with her on top, riding me, and she asked “Do you mind if I make myself come? I’m going to use my fingers.” And fuck me, that was hot. Watching her finger her clit with my cock all the way inside her was sexy enough in itself, but what *really* got me off was her sexual confidence in saying so.
Erm … yeah. That didn’t have much to do with the thread, but reading about who comes first just reminded me of it. So there you go. |
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"If I’m allowed a little tangent …"
Well, if you're allowed...many years ago I was having sex for the first time with a lady I'd known as a friend for a while. After quite a lot of foreplay we were making love on her lounge floor; she gave all the indications that she was about to cum, hips lifting, heavy breathing, flushed face, soft moans...then her dog ran over and licked her ear  oh dear...thankfully we just both burst out laughing, but no doubt is was frustrating for her. |
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"...I’d need a good five minutes of laughing until we both cry after that, before being able to start all over again."
It was laugh or cry. Of course as her orgasm disappeared, like many ladies it took quite a while for her to get back to that point (dog locked in the kitchen). Then the floodgates opened she turned up to work the next day looking tired, apparently someone made the classic remark or we know what you were up to last night |
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By *ea monkey OP Man 27 weeks ago
Manchester (he/him) |
"...I’d need a good five minutes of laughing until we both cry after that, before being able to start all over again.
It was laugh or cry. Of course as her orgasm disappeared, like many ladies it took quite a while for her to get back to that point (dog locked in the kitchen). Then the floodgates opened she turned up to work the next day looking tired, apparently someone made the classic remark or we know what you were up to last night "
This is more appropriate for the humble brag thread… |
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I'd feel like a complete failure and beg their forgiveness before leaving, never to return again. Shameful.
I had a partner who claimed she never has orgasms. We spoke in great length before we met and she emphasised this repeatedly. So much so I wondered what bothered her about this. She said she'd had bad experiences with men, who'd actually got angry over this. I assured her that this would not be the case.
To my surprise she had an orgasm, and she loved it - I was very happy for her. We giggled our socks off afterwards. Then she said I've never had an orgasm from oral either. We ticked that one off her list too, she fell off the bed that time.
Sometimes its important, sometimes it isn't, for different people and at different moments in a relationship. Good communication tends to be the conduit to contentment in most things, I find.
There are times when I don't orgasm, I am fine with it and if my partner wants a little reassurance, I'm more than happy to provide that too. It's just normal for me to have that kind of relationship with sexual partners really. |
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