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How much does culture impact your taste
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By (user no longer on site) OP 31 weeks ago
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I’m thinking of attraction mostly. But feel free to talk about your dress sense and appreciation of other people’s dress sense.
Does culture and sub culture impact your appreciation of things? When I reflect on my own upbringing and the spaces I’ve been socialised in, it definitely does for me.
Maybe it is the reason you like people a bit rough around the edges or prim and proper or people that talk a certain way or who look a certain way etc. you know the vibes |
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I mean, it’s bound to, right? Nobody exists in a vacuum.
I’ve always spent a lot of my life in musical and creative spaces. And I find talent and skill in those areas very attractive. This often comes hand in hand with focus, passion, mastery, dedication - I think I’d find it hard to separate out the innate ability from those accompanying traits in terms of attraction.
Mrs TMN x |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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Culture and intelligence are important to me. I have to be mentally attracted to someone alongside physical attraction ..... its nice to be able to have a fun conversation in-between the fun sexy stuff. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 31 weeks ago
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"Culture and intelligence are important to me. I have to be mentally attracted to someone alongside physical attraction ..... its nice to be able to have a fun conversation in-between the fun sexy stuff. "
Same. I love intelligence. But I also love intelligent people that have an interest in culture that extends beyond dominant ideas. And also that enjoy similar culture to me. My fiancé and I are so perfect because we love the same type of music and same type of films and all that shit. Yeah we like the exhibitions at the RA and shit but take me to the grime section of the black British music exhibition and recite old grime freestyles with me.
In the words of Keddie- there’s no cultural deprivation. Only cultural difference. |
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By *eliWoman 31 weeks ago
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It’s never stopped you before, Mellster "
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I am certainly not separate from my culture but I think the threads we weave are more nuanced than culture itself. It's more my interaction with culture, I guess you could consider it as phenotypical expression, in a way.
I am separate and not separate from culture at the same time. And then there's the subconscious element. E.g. For a long time I was attracted to red hair and it felt very natural, yet really it came from experience. I grew up from being a baby with a girl (my mother's best friend's daughter) who has red hair. We were basically like twins, her red hair became an association with love, play and affection. The way a child's brains develops memories of those kinds are emotive, and not time-stamped or rationalised that part of the brain is not developed and we don't possess the language to analyse them.
Self-awareness is what allows me to consider what is organismic and what is my self-concept. There are many things I'm aware of that could be thought of as transference e.g. accents, tones of voice, touch, personality traits. One of which is people who challenge cultural norms. There more I am aware the more I can choose what feels right for me.
It's the choices we make in the situations that we find ourselves that define us, I believe. I stole that off Sartre though so there you go culture is an influence but it's culture I sought, whilst trying to understand myself and how humans tick. |
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Definitely when I was younger, culture was very important to my identity and security. Becoming a father , becoming a man, having a bigger impact on the world, it became less so…. But it’s still nice to find a girl that likes good Italian food & a decent movie |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"I mean, it’s bound to, right? Nobody exists in a vacuum.
Mrs TMN x"
This. Aren't we all a product of experiences/ nurture? Popular Western physical attractive traits are different to other cultures, for example. |
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I'd love to wear some of the brightly coloured African dresses, but I'm afraid I'd be in trouble for cultural appropriation.
When I worked in a school I used to wear Asian style tops, because they were pretty and comfortable.
The female students would tell me how nice I looked. |
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As far as attraction is concerned I do find myself attracted to men as far from the East London geezers/blokes I grew up around.
My parents were not the average East Londoners, as in the weren't rough around the edges and didn't have a cockney type accent.
I like finding out how other cultures and nationalities live.
I'm currently in a long distance friendship with a Moroccan man who is educating me on his way of life.
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"I’m thinking of attraction mostly. But feel free to talk about your dress sense and appreciation of other people’s dress sense.
Does culture and sub culture impact your appreciation of things? When I reflect on my own upbringing and the spaces I’ve been socialised in, it definitely does for me.
Maybe it is the reason you like people a bit rough around the edges or prim and proper or people that talk a certain way or who look a certain way etc. you know the vibes"
I don’t really care about a woman’s image, dress etc, as long as it suits her and she looks comfortable in her own skin.
So athletes, beach bums, goths, punks, or office suit … all really sexy of it suits her and she looks comfortable. |
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I dont put that much store in “culture”. People are people and are generally the same the world over. I personally find it a bit weird that people might find you attractive just because of your “culture”. |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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"I’m thinking of attraction mostly. But feel free to talk about your dress sense and appreciation of other people’s dress sense.
Does culture and sub culture impact your appreciation of things? When I reflect on my own upbringing and the spaces I’ve been socialised in, it definitely does for me.
Maybe it is the reason you like people a bit rough around the edges or prim and proper or people that talk a certain way or who look a certain way etc. you know the vibes"
I don't judge people on how they dress so I doubt it affects me. |
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"I am certainly not separate from my culture but I think the threads we weave are more nuanced than culture itself. It's more my interaction with culture, I guess you could consider it as phenotypical expression, in a way.
I am separate and not separate from culture at the same time. And then there's the subconscious element. E.g. For a long time I was attracted to red hair and it felt very natural, yet really it came from experience. I grew up from being a baby with a girl (my mother's best friend's daughter) who has red hair. We were basically like twins, her red hair became an association with love, play and affection. The way a child's brains develops memories of those kinds are emotive, and not time-stamped or rationalised that part of the brain is not developed and we don't possess the language to analyse them.
Self-awareness is what allows me to consider what is organismic and what is my self-concept. There are many things I'm aware of that could be thought of as transference e.g. accents, tones of voice, touch, personality traits. One of which is people who challenge cultural norms. There more I am aware the more I can choose what feels right for me.
It's the choices we make in the situations that we find ourselves that define us, I believe. I stole that off Sartre though so there you go culture is an influence but it's culture I sought, whilst trying to understand myself and how humans tick."
I haven't seen a comment on the thread that isn't a worthwhile read, but this is particularly worthwhile.
Thank you. |
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Yes, I'd say it probably does. When you find you have something in common with someone and that lovely mutual spark occurs, it's great.
Music, literature and history have been rammed down my throat from birth, and it would be naive to think that they've not had an influence over the sort of people I gravitate towards. Obviously there's more to it than just the attraction of the familiar, but it is definitely an important factor. |
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A poor analogy but 'familial culture' can have an impact on people. For example, a daughter or the son have embraced and enjoy the same cultural outputs of their parents (guitarist father - musical daughter; artist mother - sculptor son).
Therefore in some respects this would also apply in regards to one's social milieu and how they have been shaped according to the cultural nuances of their surroundings, therefore influencing - perhaps dictating - their tastes, choices and appreciation of things.
I am a product of my surroundings and my culture, through various stages of my life, that have naturally evolved, changed and adapted, influenced and gently coaxed by those with whom I have lived or socialised with, those who have mentored me, those of have held me back and those who have encouraged me.
This is too much mind-fuck for a Friday and right now I'm focussing on a Fab woman who is massaging my ego on a different platform right now. However I am also going to check on the culture of logophiles and see if focussing is actually spelled as "focussing" and not "focusing" and not... ad nauseam ... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 31 weeks ago
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"Are we talking culture or class here? They're different and I have different thoughts for both. "
Well they’re invariably linked. But I’m talking about culture whilst appreciating the obvious overlap. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 31 weeks ago
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"I mean, it’s bound to, right? Nobody exists in a vacuum.
Mrs TMN x
This. Aren't we all a product of experiences/ nurture? Popular Western physical attractive traits are different to other cultures, for example. "
Agreed! Though they’ve been impacted by imperialism. Colourism is the clearest example. |
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Um.
Not that I'm particularly aware of.
I'm happy in my little gothy subculture aesthetic. But I appreciate beauty wherever it is. Sometimes I can appreciate something being beautiful even if it's not to my personal tastes or preferences, but I don't link any of those to cultural or class differences. |
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This is quite deep… say south Asian men walking around in the shalwar and kameez in parts of the UK? I’ve worn designer outfits from India during weddings and had admiring looks from people from a different culture.. but that is more a novelty than the norm.
Unless you mean… goths, emo etc which come and evolves from western culture then… it’s a live and let live thing… |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 31 weeks ago
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"This is quite deep… say south Asian men walking around in the shalwar and kameez in parts of the UK? I’ve worn designer outfits from India during weddings and had admiring looks from people from a different culture.. but that is more a novelty than the norm.
Unless you mean… goths, emo etc which come and evolves from western culture then… it’s a live and let live thing…"
I think I’m asking as you define culture. Because I don’t want to use a rigid definition for such a term. Culture to me is the Black British culture I’ve grown up in, it’s Caribbean culture I was raised in, it’s the theatre trips my Nan took me on. It’s all of it. |
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It does to some extent in that for many, particularly younger people, lounge or leisure wear is acceptable for every day or even going to the pub.
It just says "I couldn't be bothered" to me and is an instant turn off.
I'm also likely to be drawn to those with a more alternative look. It suggests independent thought and being comfortable with themselves to me. |
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By (user no longer on site) 31 weeks ago
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Surely we are all a product of our upbringing. It's been proven that external influences do have an effect on personalities and behaviour. Be they positive or negative influences they still influence. The physical influences like genes and whatnot will effect how we deal with or cope with those external influences, along with any learnt behaviour from growing up. Just look at different cultures around the world and how they treat their older generation for example. |
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"A poor analogy but 'familial culture' can have an impact on people. For example, a daughter or the son have embraced and enjoy the same cultural outputs of their parents (guitarist father - musical daughter; artist mother - sculptor son).
Therefore in some respects this would also apply in regards to one's social milieu and how they have been shaped according to the cultural nuances of their surroundings, therefore influencing - perhaps dictating - their tastes, choices and appreciation of things.
I am a product of my surroundings and my culture, through various stages of my life, that have naturally evolved, changed and adapted, influenced and gently coaxed by those with whom I have lived or socialised with, those who have mentored me, those of have held me back and those who have encouraged me.
This is too much mind-fuck for a Friday and right now I'm focussing on a Fab woman who is massaging my ego on a different platform right now. However I am also going to check on the culture of logophiles and see if focussing is actually spelled as "focussing" and not "focusing" and not... ad nauseam ... "
A good choice sir. |
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That’s a good question.
The only thing I can think of attraction wise is banter.
The town I grew up in everyone talks shit, everyone has got a bit of banter so a lot of the girls I dated you could have a proper laugh with, the majority of people I knew growing up were quick witted.
So definitely find myself more attracted to someone like that. |
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