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If you came with a warning label

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By *ittle miss sunshine OP Woman 25 weeks ago

south sheilds

What would it say?

Mine would definitely say sweet buy psycho

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By *ife NinjaMan 25 weeks ago

Dunfermline

Likely to drag you to the hot tub

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By *reyToTheFairiesWoman 25 weeks ago

Carlisle usually

Negative, arrogant, rude, entitled, and not interested ^.^

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By *reative-mindMan 25 weeks ago

Exeter

Awkward on the outside but once past that lots of fun on the inside.

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By *agnar73Man 25 weeks ago

Glasgow

Liable to lick.

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Poison.

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By *rsMistyPeaksWoman 25 weeks ago

Essex

Unstable substance.

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By *ellhungvweMan 25 weeks ago

Cheltenham

Feet will hang over edge of bed.

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By *herrybakewellCouple 25 weeks ago

Staffordshire

Addictive.

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By *ittlemissmistressKCouple 25 weeks ago

Southampton

Warning: Contains fun and bad jokes

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By *WB85Man 25 weeks ago

Staffordshire

Contains nuts.

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Mine be

COSHH

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By *ang bang bangity bangCouple 25 weeks ago

Sunderland

Please do not feed the horses

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By *BWLOVER1965Man 25 weeks ago

My Own Little World

Health and safety at work

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By *lirtyfun123Woman 25 weeks ago

essex

Addictive but a little bit psycho

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By *oo..Woman 25 weeks ago

Boo's World

Don't get wet after midnight

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By *xFoxyStoatxxWoman 25 weeks ago

Somewhere

Slippery when wet.

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By *entleman JayMan 25 weeks ago

Wakefield

Talks a lot.

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By *outhwesthotwifeWoman 25 weeks ago

southwest

Handle with care : Full of shenanigans

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By *avexxMan 25 weeks ago

cheshire

dont make me angry

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By *oveToPlay.Couple 25 weeks ago

Yorkshire

Don't spill water on me or feed me chicken after midnight

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Can cause addiction.

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By *ixenandhoundCouple 25 weeks ago

Plymouth, South west

Talks too much

Vix

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By *ools and the brainCouple 25 weeks ago

couple, us we him her.

Severe risk of boredom !

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By *ecretSearcherMan 25 weeks ago

Reading

Warning: contains nuts

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By *nnCeeWoman 25 weeks ago

East of Eden, West of Hell

Lovely, but can be a bit of a twat

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By *BWLOVER1965Man 25 weeks ago

My Own Little World

May be Hazardous to your health

Always read the label

No water after 00.00 at night

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By *atrick SwanseaMan 25 weeks ago

Swansea

Fastest Fingers First

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By *ickshawedCouple 25 weeks ago

Wolverhampton

Does not enable wearer to fly

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

I’m not mad at you, this is just my face.

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By *red333Man 25 weeks ago

Dorchester

Mine would say lubbly jubbly

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Likely to explode!

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan 25 weeks ago

Glasgow

Poor impulse control.

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Skightky kinky with erotic sensuality and romance

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By *ittlemissmistressKCouple 25 weeks ago

Southampton

"Skightky kinky with erotic sensuality and romance

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By *antastic_Mr_Fox_76Man 25 weeks ago

District 13

Handle with care

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By *ymbunnyfitCouple 25 weeks ago

East Yorkshire

Be warned may bite!

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 25 weeks ago

St Leonards

Direct, arrogant, testing, and not easily impressed.

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By *J the bullMan 25 weeks ago

Washington

Damaged goods

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By *imply DeeWoman 25 weeks ago

Wherever

Best served chilled.

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Mr - Doesn't do smalltalk with anybody.

Mrs - Does do smalltalk with anybody

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By *partharmonyCouple 25 weeks ago

Ruislip

Liable to induce butterflies in ladies.

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By *ot to giggleWoman 25 weeks ago

Coventry

can cause addiction!

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Fragile open with care

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By *heGateKeeperMan 25 weeks ago

Stratford

Sarcastic, Stubborn, Sweet

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By *ornycougaWoman 25 weeks ago

Wherever I lay my hat

Highly flammable. Enter with extreme caution

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Do not wash in cold water. Prone to shrinkage.

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By *og-ManMan 25 weeks ago

somewhere

Dry clean only

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By *ealMissShadyWoman 25 weeks ago

St Albans/ Welsh Borders

Feed liberally, might bite if hungry

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman 25 weeks ago

North West

Danger Vociferous Swearing.

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By * and M lookingCouple 25 weeks ago

Worcester

This way Up

Best Before......

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By *he turned me GreyCouple 25 weeks ago

Warwick and Coventry

Sarcastic cunt approach if you can handle.

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By *parkle1974Woman 25 weeks ago

Leeds

Hazardous to health

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By *ucka39Man 25 weeks ago

Newcastle

High voltage

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Condoms don't worry

It may look like I'm not doing anything but on a cellular level I'm exceptionally busy

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By *all me missWoman 25 weeks ago

South Wales

My cock’s bigger than yours

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

"My cock’s bigger than yours

Indeed it is ! And used by Captain Ahab to kill Moby Dick lol

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By *rucking-HellMan 25 weeks ago

Northampton

Fire damaged, may be toxic.

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By *ulieAndBeefCouple 25 weeks ago

Manchester-ish

May cause drowsiness.

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By *oeBeansMan 25 weeks ago

Derby

Caution: Hot

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By *asterR and slut mayaMan 25 weeks ago

Bradford

Does suffer fools

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

May cause insomnia

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Rock hard and loaded, danger of penetration

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By *tsOnlyMe1980Man 25 weeks ago

derby

Addicted to tea

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Awkward, neurodivergent, contradictory

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

CHOKING HAZARD, on my cock

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By *andadbodMan 25 weeks ago

Liverpool

Don’t drop

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By *gent CoulsonMan 25 weeks ago

Secret hideaway in the pennines

May bruise your arse cheeks if used correctly

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By *ugehandsMan 25 weeks ago

Fife/ Newcastle

Cuddle for best results

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By *rooketvTV/TS 25 weeks ago

Linwood

High maintenance xxx

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By *sWyldWoman 25 weeks ago

Edinburgh

Nothing is ever half hearted, you shouldn't be either

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By *ot to giggleWoman 25 weeks ago

Coventry

"Caution: Hot

very

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By *alloSpaceboyMan 25 weeks ago

Carmarthen

WIDE LOAD

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By *urbo TedMan 25 weeks ago

Stansted

Burns in the sun.

Dont feed him blue smarties.

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By *azmar62Couple 25 weeks ago

Hinckley

Risk of drowning. Wear snorkel and mask when muffin. Lol

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man 25 weeks ago

BRIDPORT

Breathing apparatus recommended, farts profusely

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By *uzy750TV/TS 25 weeks ago

Luton

WARNING

UNPOPULAR OPINIONS AHEAD

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By *lue RascalMan 25 weeks ago

Cheshire Liverpool Manchester

HANGRY - Approach with snacks!

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By *onderWomanWlvWoman 25 weeks ago

Wolverhampton

Will probably forget to reply to your message

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Stubborn and doesn’t do small talk

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By *agatoXXXMan 25 weeks ago

A Place Where Time Runs Slow

Remember to give him Clozapine.

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By *obilebottomMan 25 weeks ago

All over

Too sexy for my shirt.

just joking

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By *ir kinkyMan 25 weeks ago

munster

Instructions lost proceed when wet

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By *ttentiveRabbitMan 25 weeks ago

Lymington

If d*unk, giggles to tears about random stuff

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

REDUCE YOUR SPEED

We have all night

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By *inister_SpinsterWoman 25 weeks ago

North West

Slippery when wet.

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By *eronicaExplorerWoman 25 weeks ago

London

[Removed by poster at 07/04/24 22:37:47]

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By *eronicaExplorerWoman 25 weeks ago

London

Veronica in the mirror is farther than she appears

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By *rucking-HellMan 25 weeks ago

Northampton

The following side effects are very common:

Delirium

Loss of appetite

Dizziness

Wet dreams

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By *as7643Man 25 weeks ago

staffs

Warning over use will make your knees week

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By *cflirtyMan 25 weeks ago

closer than you might think

Caution fully charged

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By *educing_EmCouple 25 weeks ago

Tipperary

Weird little human

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By *icentiousCouple 25 weeks ago

Up on them there hills

A behavioural mirror.

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By *ewcatWoman 25 weeks ago

Berkshire

Awkward potato.

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By *eroLondonMan 25 weeks ago

Mayfair

Malevolently benevolent.

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By *ose-tinted GlassesMan 25 weeks ago

Glasgow

Do not tumble dry.

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Crazy as a horse

Needle in haystack

The 7 routes of sex medication or meditation

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Handle with care.

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By *azmar62Couple 25 weeks ago

Hinckley

This way up. If in doubt, roll in flour and look for the wet bit.

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By *avinaTVTV/TS 25 weeks ago

Transsexual Transylvania

Abandon hope, all ye who enter.

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By *odevilWoman 25 weeks ago

exeter

I actually DO come with a warning label!

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By *he turned me GreyCouple 25 weeks ago

Warwick and Coventry

He is great at sex, he always cums

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By *isaSlutFaceCouple 25 weeks ago

Solihull

Don't introduce to your parents

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By *ea monkeyMan 25 weeks ago

Manchester (he/him)

Do not open before reading instructions.

Object is larger than appears.

Complex machinery, do not use when drowsy

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By *ggdrasil66Man 25 weeks ago

Saltdean

Language Warning (not for the feint hearted).

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By *ed MartinMan 25 weeks ago

Shefford

Parental advisory: Explicit Lyrics.

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By *undee2Man 25 weeks ago

Dundee

Boring as fuck ....... until your front door closes

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan 25 weeks ago

Gloucestershire

Caution - liable to steal all your cake

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Open with care/ gushing to be expected/ wear wet suit.

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By *BWLOVER1965Man 25 weeks ago

My Own Little World

Government Health warning

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By *neakypeaky30Man 25 weeks ago

Midlands

Hopeless, helpless, can get hangry but otherwise lovely

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By *nnCeeWoman 25 weeks ago

East of Eden, West of Hell

If you can read this message, please turn right side up and apply cuddles

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By *rumguy1982Man 25 weeks ago

Birmingham

Talks alot, licks alot, and thinks he is funny

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By *ickyKlungespeareMan 25 weeks ago

St Leonards

"Don't tempt him with a thread on gaping arseholes"

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Can explode without warning

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By *ritladMan 25 weeks ago

Taunton

Shy, contains bad jokes, approach like marmite

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Ear defenders to be warn...not the quietest person in the world.

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By *ittlemissmistressKCouple 25 weeks ago

Southampton

[Removed by poster at 08/04/24 15:36:52]

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By *ittlemissmistressKCouple 25 weeks ago

Southampton

Warning... unstable ,approach with caution and wear ppe

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By *hoccaMan 25 weeks ago

local

[Removed by poster at 08/04/24 15:39:31]

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By *irthandgirthMan 25 weeks ago

Camberley occasionally doncaster

Potentially addictive

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By *coobyBoobyDooWoman 25 weeks ago

Markfield

CAUTION: Unhinged

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By *imi_RougeWoman 25 weeks ago

Portsmouth

Approach with caution

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By *eroLondonMan 25 weeks ago

Mayfair

Approach with Luncheon Vouchers™.

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By *ot to giggleWoman 25 weeks ago

Coventry

"Approach with Luncheon Vouchers™."

for spam sandwiches ?

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By *eroLondonMan 25 weeks ago

Mayfair

"Approach with Luncheon Vouchers™.

for spam sandwiches ?

•

Corned Bééf, my duchess. xx²

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By *oubleswing2019Man 25 weeks ago

Colchester

Moody. Intense. Prone to self-reflection. Listens intently, says little. Nihilistic.

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Total prick avoid

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By *ust MikeMan 25 weeks ago

Yaxley

May cause drowsiness

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By *arla SwingerWoman 25 weeks ago

Somewhere

I'm a bit of a cunt

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By *aptain Caveman41Man 25 weeks ago

Home

Cuddly but talks about Star Trek

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By (user no longer on site) 25 weeks ago

Fiercely passionate about what matters to me, so meet me where I am as an equal, or be ready to hear you're in the wrong lane!

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