FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you respond to winks?
Do you respond to winks?
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I being winked at. If a profile interests me I will wink back and hopefully they will follow through with a message.
I don’t like making the first move so I will wink people I like the look of. It feels less of a rejection if someone doesn’t respond to a wink than it does if they don’t respond to a message.
Kx |
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"Priority always given to those who make an effort to communicate their interests effectively as opposed to winks."
But I use a wink to establish whether the person I’m winking at wants or would get a very well composed message  |
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"I being winked at. If a profile interests me I will wink back and hopefully they will follow through with a message.
I don’t like making the first move so I will wink people I like the look of. It feels less of a rejection if someone doesn’t respond to a wink than it does if they don’t respond to a message.
Kx "
This  |
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Coincidentally I just posted a response on the Scottish forum, so I may as well say it verbatim:
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I've often said on here that sending a wink is a perfunctory action. I haven't sent one for over three years, other than those which are part of a forum game or a challenge (an equally pointless exercise). I've sat next to 'women friends' at a social who have shown me their 'wink tally', with the number varying between 350 and 600++ winks. A wink from a man - no matter how well-intentioned - will simply languish like a forgotten child in some obscure orphanage.
No woman of substance has the time or the wherewithal to sift through an ever-increasing mountain of winks. Hence their limited use. In fairness they are useful to a small minority...couples perhaps. |
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By (user no longer on site) 34 weeks ago
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"Priority always given to those who make an effort to communicate their interests effectively as opposed to winks.
But I use a wink to establish whether the person I’m winking at wants or would get a very well composed message "
Oops, wink, blink and miss it. 
No time to waste on what ifs, and much prefer someone who's precise and to the point. |
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By *bi HaiveMan 34 weeks ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
I treat them the same as messages.
If its from someone with a profile that gives me enough of an idea as to whether I might be interested in finding out more, then yes, I'll send a message.
If its from a pretty much blank profile, or someone that clearly hasn't read mine, or is eleventybillion miles away somewhere that I'll never likely visit......then no. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 34 weeks ago
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"I think there a good way to see if people are interested or not  "
Im not sure about that one, I know a lady friend who got about 200+ within a few hours of joining. |
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By (user no longer on site) 34 weeks ago
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I do. I even encourage it in my profile so that at least it indicates interest if they don't want to message first, and it means I don't have to send the the first message in the hope that it's read. |
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If we get a wink, we always look..
sometimes the look won’t get past the profile pic.
If it’s someone we like the look of we’ll wink back.. If it’s someone from our hotlist we’ll be messaging immediately.
We’ve had some great nights and made some great friends from a wink. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 34 weeks ago
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"We are fine with winks, openly invited them on our page. Though we only follow up if the profile doing it matches what we are looking for. If not then they are deleted. "
Don't you ever run into the issue of getting winks from the same people when you delete them? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 34 weeks ago
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"I'd rather folk winked than messaged.
I don't feel bad ignoring a wink if he doesn't interest me, but I sometimes do when it's a nice message but he just doesn't float my boat. "
Interesting. I see your point. |
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It very much depends on the profile of the winker.
In many cases winks are received from profiles that are not compatible, so they get ignored.
If we think they're OK we'll wink back or message.
Nita |
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By (user no longer on site) 34 weeks ago
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Ooh that elusive wink..how jolly marvellous.
I love a good winking.
If my mind believes he is a bit If alright Jack the lad. He may get a block instead.Harsh but no cruel intensions |
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"We are fine with winks, openly invited them on our page. Though we only follow up if the profile doing it matches what we are looking for. If not then they are deleted.
Don't you ever run into the issue of getting winks from the same people when you delete them?"
Not really. It's probably happened but less than you would think. |
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I love winks 
Always have a look and if your profile piques my interest I wink back and send a message.
To me they are a lovely little icebreaker.
I see them as eye contact or a smile if we met in person, you know that old school kind of flirting
S xxx |
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Yes we do. If we are interested we wink back and then wait for them to send a message as they winked first.
Maybe going to rethink this as a lot of people don’t follow up with a message after receiving a wink back. |
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"Yes we do. If we are interested we wink back and then wait for them to send a message as they winked first.
Maybe going to rethink this as a lot of people don’t follow up with a message after receiving a wink back. "
Same as us! |
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We look at winks - more often than not they are people who haven’t made any effort on their profile so you know the wink is just a lazy way of communicating.
But sometimes we receive one and either reply back with one or send a message.
Sometimes we’ll send one to show interest - this maybe a profile that isn’t local or we aren’t sure if we are what someone is looking for and so it gives them a chance to view us.
It’s just another tool FAB provides and as the responses above show, they get used or not used by people differently.
K |
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"We look at winks - more often than not they are people who haven’t made any effort on their profile so you know the wink is just a lazy way of communicating.
But sometimes we receive one and either reply back with one or send a message.
Sometimes we’ll send one to show interest - this maybe a profile that isn’t local or we aren’t sure if we are what someone is looking for and so it gives them a chance to view us.
It’s just another tool FAB provides and as the responses above show, they get used or not used by people differently.
K"
Yeah exactly what they are for and why I use them |
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By *untogetherCouple 34 weeks ago
Malaga, Spain, Not in U. K. |
"We respond to a small percentage. We've just had a wink from a well verified couple with only photo's of the Lady on their profile, so it gets ignored."
Yes, if it's a couple and there is not one picture of the male ( or just close up cock pics) we won't respond. We like to get a general idea of what BOTH people look like before we commit to a wink. |
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When and if I get a wink, I make sure to say thanks at the very least. I personally use winks as a way to show interest without having another DM to check for the couple or woman being winked at (they usually get enough DM's as it is). If I do get a wink or message back, Awesome. |
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Females and couples yes, single males generally not unless I'm convinced they aren't bi. I don't subscribe to the 'winks are lazy' point of view, I'd rather a wink so I can decide how to respond than knowing someone has wasted their time writing me a nice message that I'm immediately not interested in. Time is precious to us all. |
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I always respond to a wink. Usually just by a return wink. I appreciate some people may be a bit shy regarding what to put in a first message so by returning a wink it says I am open to accept and respond to a worded message. I take a wink as an initial expression of I like what I see just like that initial look you often get across a crowded bar. |
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We haven't responded to winks. We're flattered that people have winked at us.
Our reason for being on fab (and attending events) has been from the start and remains the voyeur & exhibitionist aspect - we had and still have no express intention to swap or share. Watching and being watched is what excites us.
So winking back (or us offering the first wink) might give the impression that we would be interested in swapping or sharing.
Caveat...
Like we say in our profile, we could be tempted to soft-swap or play if we meet the right people...
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