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I think 1 of my kids is gay
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I have the kind of relationship with my children that I could say to my son, So, when are you bringing your boyfriend round for dinner. Or vice versa for my daughters.
I'd maybe drop into a conversation that someone being gay isn't a big deal for you.
Without knowing your children or you it's hard to give much advice.
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By *iasubTV/TS 40 weeks ago
Ilkeston |
Do not rush them its sucks when it happens (talking from experience of having to come out) and just be there to listen. Its a really difficult thing to do especially to family and has to be on their terms if and when they do. But also they may never come out which is also okay |
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Just keep loving them as you already do if they are and they feel the time is right they will talk to you about it so just be there for them as any parent would support their child no matter what age they are |
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they're your kids and will always be your kids.
they'll always love you no matter what.
do the same,
When they feel ready to talk tell them that their happiness is what's important, and give them a big i'll alway love you hug.like only mum can give.  |
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When they're ready to tell you listen with your heart. This is massive to them. Make sure they know that you see them no differently. If you think there's a chance you may not be able to support them fully maybe seek some support yourself, or look for advice from parents that have been through similar, before they tell you. I hope that makes sense, I'm sure it's a very sensitive subject for you all good luck  |
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I wouldn't worry about it, just be there for them and support them as required. For the most part most people don't care about someone's sexuality these days ... There will always be a few idiots that may bully but that's the same of you are fat, ginger or any other minority trait. |
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One of my step sons is toying with his curiosity.
My son, who’s 9 says often he’s not sure if he fancies boys or girls.
I’m just pleased they feel they can talk through their emotions with me. As long as they are happy that is all I’d want to affect.
Their sexuality won’t change my love for them.
K
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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Nothing. You wait until they feel ready to tell you themselves.
Your child’s sexuality shouldn’t change the love you have for them so, let them know that and support them. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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"Hello so i think 1 of my kids is gay
All the signs are there and maybe another 1 is too so what should i do about this ?"
What are the signs you’re referring to? |
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"Are we not in the 21st century? Does this even matter any more?
For some people it matters. Although tesla are working on a chip to make us all think and feel the same way. "
I thought Bill Gates had already included it in the COVID vaccine? |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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I knew my eldest was queer (their own description) before they did. And the day they told me, I said 'I know but thanks for telling me'
Not long after, they brought their first girlfriend to meet me.
My kids were raised knowng I was a safe space. That nothing they said or did would stop me loving them. Because that's what parents should be, a safe space.
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"Hello so i think 1 of my kids is gay
All the signs are there and maybe another 1 is too so what should i do about this ?"
As other people have said just be there for them whatever they need advice shoulder to cry on if needed
Be their rock as you probably are an always will be  |
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"Are we not in the 21st century? Does this even matter any more?
For some people it matters. Although tesla are working on a chip to make us all think and feel the same way.
I thought Bill Gates had already included it in the COVID vaccine?"
Clever bloke |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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"Hello so i think 1 of my kids is gay
All the signs are there and maybe another 1 is too so what should i do about this ?"
If you think this is a problem then you are the problem. Let them embrace what ever path life takes them. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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"I knew my eldest was queer (their own description) before they did. And the day they told me, I said 'I know but thanks for telling me'
Not long after, they brought their first girlfriend to meet me.
My kids were raised knowng I was a safe space. That nothing they said or did would stop me loving them. Because that's what parents should be, a safe space.
"
I loved the above comment, spot on.
I generalised from when they were in primary, nothing specific but always indicated that should they had preferences, then it was ok. It was just something dropped into conversations when something around the topic occurred.
It helped that their uncle is gay and married.
I must have banged on a little too much as I actually had one of their friends come out to me. Which was an incredible privileged.
If you are open and talk about it in general like it's no biggie, then seriously, it becomes no biggie! |
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Just b there! My trans daughter took a while to come out! Wish she had told me much much earlier! Could have started the process much sooner! But having aspergers as well made things more difficult for her! X |
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"Hello so i think 1 of my kids is gay
All the signs are there and maybe another 1 is too so what should i do about this ?
I don't even understand why this is a question?
Just love them."
This ^
Must be one of those days. |
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How and why do you think this? Perhaps you're putting 2+2 together and getting 5. Jumping to conclusions etc. if they're old enough to enjoy a sex life, and we don't know how old they are, why don't you concentrate on sexual safety, supporting them with their decisions and being there when and if it all goes wrong. Communicate.!
My mum thought I was on heroin when she saw a kit cat wrapper on my bedside table when I was a student.
Thought I was gay when I went to see broke back mountain at the cinema (It was crap and I walked out).
She's a gold medalist at jumping to conclusions. |
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Not even sure this is a serious question? You kick them out of the house with no money or clothing and tell them you’re ashamed of them… and make sure you use the phrase ‘ not natural… and perverted!’
Or option B - its doesnt matter who or how they love… |
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By *sWyldWoman 40 weeks ago
Edinburgh |
"What would you do if you thought one of your kids was heterosexual?
Do much the same  "
This.
I knew my eldest was Gay long before he came out. When he did, I told him I was proud of him.
It's really no different |
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By *TAXMan 40 weeks ago
Watford |
Don’t put any pressure on them or drop hints just be aware and wait to see what unfolds can keep reminding them your always there to talk no matter what x just say a problem shared is a problem halved !!!! |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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One of my daughters is gay ,best advice I can give is make sure they feel as comfortable as they can knowing they can open up to you , hold them that wee big tighter and help them bat away as much prejudice that's still out there ,and let them be just who they were always meant to be . |
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By *ark169Man 40 weeks ago
Leamington |
Banish them from the house immediately and tell them to never darken your doorstep again!
I’m joking: don’t do any of that.
It warms my heart that this thread has produced such supportive and positive advice. As many have wisely said: Just love them…. |
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By *irthandgirthMan 40 weeks ago
Camberley occasionally doncaster |
Don't treat them any differently. Make sure your home is non judgemental and where they feel safe and secure.
Love them unconditionally.
Don't show any negative reaction if you see any non-hetero relationships on TV etc.
Be prepared to be totally open with them. |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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Support them when they come to you and let them know you are there for them all the way.. lots of groups around for parent's to chat, educate and not feel alone in this journey. |
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"Hello so i think 1 of my kids is gay
All the signs are there and maybe another 1 is too so what should i do about this ?"
Speak positively about lgbtq+ people in the public eye, then they’ll know they will be accepted |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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"Hello so i think 1 of my kids is gay
All the signs are there and maybe another 1 is too so what should i do about this ?"
Above all be supportive and understanding |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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"One of my daughters is gay ,best advice I can give is make sure they feel as comfortable as they can knowing they can open up to you , hold them that wee big tighter and help them bat away as much prejudice that's still out there ,and let them be just who they were always meant to be . "
This ?? |
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"Just love them anyway
What difference does their sexuality make?
 "
This! My oldest was so scared to come out to me....my reaction was... ok tell me all about them then, and to let her know about my own sexuality.
We've been all over since her dating girls and boys and my reply is as long as you are/they make you happy that's all that matters and there doesn't need to be a label to it.
Tinder |
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By (user no longer on site) 40 weeks ago
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Love the comments!!
I do just want to add that not everyone wants to come out to their parents, family or even all their friends. I knew I was bi since late teens and have never told my parents, and only a few good friends know - I feel no urge or need to go into my sexual preferences with anyone except a regular lover. Just as I wouldn’t tell my parents I swing!
Maybe a weird contradiction being on Fab where it’s all out in the open but just wanted to add it’s also ok if people don’t want to tell. I l’m not embarrassed being bi and once my parents got over the shock they would realise it makes sense - but I just don’t feel it has anything to do with anyone except the people I have sex or relationships! |
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"What would you do if you thought one of your kids was heterosexual?
Do much the same "
I know what you mean but I don't think it's as simple as that...In an ideal world, yes, however you view it, it is different and in the main, more difficult..
I think it's an enormous challenge and hope it all works out well for everyone
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