FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you care...
Do you care...
Jump to: Newest in thread
Nah. If people don't like me that's okay. At least they can choose to dislike me instead of disliking some vain attempt to be likeable.
I notice some people. Some positively. Some negatively. It is what it is. Nobody actually likes everyone  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Unless anyone on Fab pays for my mortgage, bills, food etc while entitled to their opinions I won't care either as their opinions isn't desired or required |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago
Secret hideaway in the pennines |
We all like to create a good impression, especially as most are looking for sex, but having hit the age where choices are now limited, and I not actually looking for play partners, honest answer now is no, I don't |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
In a nutshell yes.
But if you asked me do a care what I think about how a lot of strangers who read what I post out, no, I don’t know them. But I do post sincerely, so I’ve got not problems if someone doesn’t like me for that. Which might explain a lot.  
I do care what people put, because that can make or break my online admiration of someone.
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"Nah. If people don't like me that's okay. At least they can choose to dislike me instead of disliking some vain attempt to be likeable.
I notice some people. Some positively. Some negatively. It is what it is. Nobody actually likes everyone "
No, I don't think they do. I do think the majority are indifferent to the majority though. Bordering on indifference at the very least.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
No, I don't care people will always like it dislike you for whatever reasons and that's ok.
There are people I like and dislike based on their forum presence.
I'm just me, nothing more, nothing less.
Making a block list makes me smile as much as a hotlist.
Mrs |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"Unless anyone on Fab pays for my mortgage, bills, food etc while entitled to their opinions I won't care either as their opinions isn't desired or required"
Yes. You can't control how another person perceives you so it's kind of... wasted energy caring too much about their opinion (in most circumstances). |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
The forums are a place for me to relax and have a laugh. I can be who I want to be and fully appreciate there's going to be some people who's gears you grind. It really doesn't bother me in the slightest |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"We all like to create a good impression, especially as most are looking for sex, but having hit the age where choices are now limited, and I not actually looking for play partners, honest answer now is no, I don't "
It's good to read you again AC.
Is it a good impression or a false one though? I'd much rather someone wanted to have sex with the real me rather than a carefully curated image of who I am because keeping that up? Far too much effort. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *hrimper36Couple
over a year ago
Central France dept 36 |
"about how others view you on the forum? Would it affect what you post?
Do you care enough to view others in a particular way? Notice/pay attention more often to posters?
"
Nope not at all because being happy in your own skin allows a person to detach themselves from others comments.
Being Autistic also helps.
T |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
It's not so much about caring if they don't but I'm one of those sickos that likes to know why.
It won't change how I lost either way.
I don't like everyone and not everyone will like me. That's just how it is.
Em x
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
As I said in the "What do you think of me?" thread yesterday I was surprised on a previous occasion that some people got in touch to compliment me on my forum contributions.
I can only post one way so I'll never change that to suit others or post to catch someone's eye.
The only opinions that really matter to me are those of the people who actually know me.
While it's nice to receive compliments from complete strangers through the forums I don't post for praise in the same way I don't put up pics for fabs.
Unfortunately I struggle to reciprocate when people do that because I've never spoken to them and haven't really noticed their posting style. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *stellaWoman
over a year ago
London |
"about how others view you on the forum? Would it affect what you post?
Do you care enough to view others in a particular way? Notice/pay attention more often to posters?
"
I care. But not so as to change my opinions that I post or move me from my values. I mean I care in that a positive response or reply can cheer me and vice versa, it creates a feeling in me - I then choose how I respond to that feeling going forward.
I’ve been off for a while so I’m less familiar with posters on the whole compared to earlier years here but yes I do seek out the people I know and like to read, you included Meli, although I enjoy reading contributions from people I don’t know too and am building up new posters that interest me - I’m just less ravenous at converting the experience into endless DMs these days. I have my people.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I do care as you know Meli. But because of wonderful people like you, no it doesn’t impact what I post. I’m me and people can like me or block me. Plenty have chosen the latter
Ok maybe it impacts what I post a little bit because I don’t talk about certain topics as much as I once did. Self preservation and that. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think when I first started posting, I cared a lot so tried to stick to the very light-hearted thread or keep my views as inoffensive as possible.
I think I'm a bit more outspoken on certain topics and post more opinions some may consider unpopular but I think a big reason why I don't go all out is simply that I can't be arsed to get into an argument with a stranger on a sex site over the internet |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I guess it would depend on how many or who shares that opinion. I will poke fun at people, but my intentions are never to genuinely upset them.
It's one of the best filters we have here to find compatible matches |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I certainly am mindful to never cause offence to anyone.
Well….unless they bloody well deserve it
Hopefully, folks can see that most of what I post is very much tongue in cheek  "
I'm glad you're not one of those morons who are all "OFFENce Is tAKEN, not GiVEN"... Ok, that's one of my more outspoken views |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"about how others view you on the forum? Would it affect what you post?
Do you care enough to view others in a particular way? Notice/pay attention more often to posters?"
Yes, of course I care about how others view me on the forum. How much that affects what I post is open to interpretation.
Yes, I notice other posters. Mostly when I'm pre-emptively blocking obvious wankers. Hot people get hotlisted, however. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
If I'm honest when people see what I post negatively, yes it bugs me.
Being called an attention seeker bugs me, being told I'm not inclusive bugs me. Do I care, yes I clearly do if it bugs me. But probably more because I didn't see myself that way so it stands out more and seems a bit off.
Where some have listed things they don't like seeing people do I have sat there conscious of when I do it and felt like I shouldn't.
But actually, I haven't stopped completely so I guess I don't care enough to let those people win. Or what they say is so good dam true and I just can't help myself?
Beside that I think there's a fair few on here that don't get my style of posts and take them way too literally and others that think I'm posting about me when I'm really not.
But sod it. Or like you say Meli, fuck it, someone said the other day we all make up the forum and you can't keep everyone happy all of the time.
Christ you get a divide over terminology alone on here, and whether flirting in a forum is ok or not blah blah blah. Yet the same people will utter the words 'you do you' in the moments where they aren't slagging off the things people do and say just to make themselves look good.
Ill shut up now.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I certainly am mindful to never cause offence to anyone.
Well….unless they bloody well deserve it
Hopefully, folks can see that most of what I post is very much tongue in cheek
I'm glad you're not one of those morons who are all "OFFENce Is tAKEN, not GiVEN"... Ok, that's one of my more outspoken views "
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Yes I care, to some extent but not to a level that it plays on my mind. I've established and forged some real-world p+sitive connections and friendships which originated from here.
I instinctively pay more attention to those posters who I find interesting based on their contributions. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"about how others view you on the forum? Would it affect what you post?
Do you care enough to view others in a particular way? Notice/pay attention more often to posters?
"
No, part of the reason I like the forum is that I don't have to care what anyone thinks of me here. Means I can be more genuine and open.
There are some people I notice for positive reasons and I just don't remember the people who I don't like. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Not in every case. It's such an ethereal space .....
BUT - I don't make personal comments in any case.
I have 'jokes' ONLY with personalities i've percieved over a long time and know they know where it's coming from.
I make the odd mistake and afford some a sense of humour they lack and stop forum contact immediately in that case - for their sake not mine.
And of course I care.... anyone who says they don't is by definition a sociopath
I'm just popping up to count the sociopaths.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *gent CoulsonMan
over a year ago
Secret hideaway in the pennines |
"We all like to create a good impression, especially as most are looking for sex, but having hit the age where choices are now limited, and I not actually looking for play partners, honest answer now is no, I don't
It's good to read you again AC.
Is it a good impression or a false one though? I'd much rather someone wanted to have sex with the real me rather than a carefully curated image of who I am because keeping that up? Far too much effort."
agreed, people will or won't like me for who I am, and as I said, do I care, again, no I dont |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"I do care as you know Meli. But because of wonderful people like you, no it doesn’t impact what I post. I’m me and people can like me or block me. Plenty have chosen the latter
Ok maybe it impacts what I post a little bit because I don’t talk about certain topics as much as I once did. Self preservation and that. "
Yes. But you recognise it does impact you a little bit. There's some part of you that stops you posting certain things. You've adapted your voice slightly so it saves you grief. I don't think there's anything wrong with that.
I'm glad there are people that have stopped the impact for you, Pickle. Sometimes I've been very tempted to reply to certain posts but I'm reminded reacting isn't the best way to handle it. So I go and find something better to do (deepthroat a friend). |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"But probably more because I didn't see myself that way so it stands out more and seems a bit off. "
Yes, that's understandable. I think if people say you're x, y and z negative things you can go back and think... what? Really? I've had it before where people have wildly misinterpreted a thread I've made, a post. And then ran with their confirmation bias for a long time.
"Where some have listed things they don't like seeing people do I have sat there conscious of when I do it and felt like I shouldn't."
It's easier said than done but even when I know posters have deliberately referenced me in those lists, I keep on posting. In my way. Why should you appease everyone? If you're not a total arse you're good to carry on doing you.
"But sod it. Or like you say Meli, fuck it, someone said the other day we all make up the forum and you can't keep everyone happy all of the time.
...Ill shut up now."
Waffle away but I'm going to cut it down when replying.
I do think everyone contributes to the forum and makes it what it is. I was a tad hormonal and soppy when I said it the other day but it's true. I also think - it's fine if you care. It doesn't make you an attention seeker or bad in anyway. I care to varying extents based on who.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I used to when I first started using the forums.
I wanted people to like me.
Fast forward a few years and I realise it doesn’t matter at all.
Faces come and go.
I’ve been lucky enough to make some decent friends on here, one in particular who I’m hoping to meet.
I post on threads that interest me and avoid the ones where the same few people will take it over and others are excluded.
In short I use the forums these days in a way that suits me not anyone else. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"I think when I first started posting, I cared a lot so tried to stick to the very light-hearted thread or keep my views as inoffensive as possible.
I think I'm a bit more outspoken on certain topics and post more opinions some may consider unpopular but I think a big reason why I don't go all out is simply that I can't be arsed to get into an argument with a stranger on a sex site over the internet "
Yes. You were very careful and polite and then you were a bit of a gobshite in a deliberately amusing way.
It's a lot of effort isn't it? Love debates but can't be bothered with what masquerades as one on here most of the time. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ndycoinsMan
over a year ago
Whaley Bridge,Nr Buxton, |
The late great Jewish Comedian and scriptwriter(Yeshiva graduate,former Rabbi,)Jackie Mason used the offence is taken not given phrase when interviewed about his Jewish experience based comedy,which non Jewish people decided to be offended by on someone elses behalf.After 50 years in the business was he a moron? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *stellaWoman
over a year ago
London |
"I'd say no but when tea monkey puts his what do you think of me posts up its always a nice surprise what people think of me"
I adore you - you’ve been a Fab favourite of mine for years and I hope you know it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think when I first started posting, I cared a lot so tried to stick to the very light-hearted thread or keep my views as inoffensive as possible.
I think I'm a bit more outspoken on certain topics and post more opinions some may consider unpopular but I think a big reason why I don't go all out is simply that I can't be arsed to get into an argument with a stranger on a sex site over the internet
Yes. You were very careful and polite and then you were a bit of a gobshite in a deliberately amusing way.
It's a lot of effort isn't it? Love debates but can't be bothered with what masquerades as one on here most of the time. "
Yeah, I think it's more of a case of familiarity now. Enough people know my personality where I don't need to worry if things come across in the wrong time but agree with you on the debates, very rarely anything goes in and it feels more like shouting at a brick wall. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
no i dont care about strangers views of me on a sex site forum . the forums are just amusement entertainment ultimately ..
cant really be worried about people that are insignificant to my actual life . |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The late great Jewish Comedian and scriptwriter(Yeshiva graduate,former Rabbi,)Jackie Mason used the offence is taken not given phrase when interviewed about his Jewish experience based comedy,which non Jewish people decided to be offended by on someone elses behalf.After 50 years in the business was he a moron?"
He probably wasn't. The people who don't know that context and use it to justify their openly hostile opinions? Absolute fucking morons |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I'm not Willy Wonka so don't sugar coat shit, I'll say it how it is...a lot dislike that but I'm not here to win a popularity contest.
There are posters I avoid for several reasons due to how/what they post. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Liverpool |
I like to come across as I intend to come across.
If I don't, then I'm not particularly put out by it. I don't really care much of what others think of me, nice if it's something good but it's not world destroying if not. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"I'm not Willy Wonka so don't sugar coat shit, I'll say it how it is...a lot dislike that but I'm not here to win a popularity contest.
There are posters I avoid for several reasons due to how/what they post."
I don't think a lot do dislike it though. Said it before on the thread - like how you're probably bordering on indifference with most posts, the majority will be the same with you. Posting what you want and also accepting others might disagree? That's healthy definitely. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I suppose in a way yes, I do hold back from really saying what J think sometimes in case people don't understand my banter or get offended. I am from the North East where banter is prevalent, but I understand not everyone on here appreciates it. So yes I suppose I care in that I don't come across like a total dickhead. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
No.How people might view me bad never changed how I post on the forums. I know what I post quite often goes against the grain on here and there are a fair few people who don't like that. But that's fine. It is just my opinion after all people don't have to agree with me.
I try not to be rude to anyone on here,even those who try and argue with things I say.
I have deleted some posts before I post because getting a ban isn't worth it though. But the forums are such a mix of personalities anyhow that there will always be those you like or dislike.
There are some people though whose public persona and private personas are worlds apart on the forums.It is a pity they are so insecure that they find they have to hide their true personality in order to try and be one of the so called popular crew on the forums . |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"about how others view you on the forum? Would it affect what you post?
Do you care enough to view others in a particular way? Notice/pay attention more often to posters?
"
Hmm. I care about the opinions of a select few - if I think you're good people I'd like you to think I'm good people. There are definitely people whose posts I look out for as they're either funny, thought-provoking or delightfully filthy.
I do sometimes self-censor but not so much because I worry my comment will cause someone to change their opinion of me (I doubt I register enough for many to have formed an opinion anyway) - it's normally because I don't want to be drawn into some tedious argument, so I leave it be. This has also made me leave topics that I started because people jumped in to make trouble and I just can't be bothered with it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
No. The day I'm even remotely affected by what a bunch of random strangers thinks of me is the day I might as well climb into a wooden box and let them put me on the funeral pyre.
I rarely post these days, but in the past I've never been afraid to speak (post?) my mind, often going against the general consensus...it's earned me some (often very vocal, even if not brave enough to say it to me directly) haters over the years. Good, I say! That means I made them come out of their echo chamber for at least the length of time it took to spout their disapproval. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’m gonna talk how I talk and reference what I reference and I shouldn’t have to change who I am to fit in or appease the people on this forum. 
"
Please carry on!  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I don't really think so, no.
I tend to just potter from thread to thread posting randomly really.
I'm not sure what people think of me/my posting. Their opinions is theirs to own. Its all good
MrsAbz |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *essaMayWoman
over a year ago
Fairytale Wood |
Nah been here too long, i'm me and I'm fine with that. I post what i think and have a view on popular or not. I don't get involved with these validation or attention seeking threads, I simply don't need that. I don’t post dependent on who is commenting on the thread.
I have probably caused unintentional offence many times, but in the end I'm not here to sell myself for popularity.
I'm far from perfect and have made many mistakes, but i own them all. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"about how others view you on the forum? Would it affect what you post?
Do you care enough to view others in a particular way? Notice/pay attention more often to posters?
"
Yes and no.
Whilst I care deeply about what people think about me and I crave to be liked,I also won't sacrifice my principles and beliefs to fit in.
Testament to this has been my very vocal criticism of "sycophantic kiss ass thread's"
I want to be liked but I want to be liked for me not an internet fake version of me.
I have two very simple rules in life: honesty and respect. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Very few people know me on fab, so I'm certainly not impacted by how they might feel about me..
However, if it was someone irl that i admire / care for I'd be gutted if they didn't like me |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ndycoinsMan
over a year ago
Whaley Bridge,Nr Buxton, |
"The late great Jewish Comedian and scriptwriter(Yeshiva graduate,former Rabbi,)Jackie Mason used the offence is taken not given phrase when interviewed about his Jewish experience based comedy,which non Jewish people decided to be offended by on someone elses behalf.After 50 years in the business was he a moron?
He probably wasn't. The people who don't know that context and use it to justify their openly hostile opinions? Absolute fucking morons "
How dare anyone have an opinion in a free country,zis is ridiculous,put zeese soughts from your mind,escape is impossible,for you zee war is over,but first you go to our kamerad in China to zee re education camp.
Calling people with a different view,without making any attempt to discuss or understand that view morons is in itself moronic.Anyone with a different view to me is a moron,is moronic.I am intellectually superior to people with a different view is moronic.My view is the only 'normal' 'right' view is moronic.Shallow,blinkered and meretricious. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *mf123Man
over a year ago
with one foot out the door |
Not really im sure some think im mental some think nothing some will find me funny some will think me a saddo but most wont really care after 20 seconds of reading something i type |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The late great Jewish Comedian and scriptwriter(Yeshiva graduate,former Rabbi,)Jackie Mason used the offence is taken not given phrase when interviewed about his Jewish experience based comedy,which non Jewish people decided to be offended by on someone elses behalf.After 50 years in the business was he a moron?
He probably wasn't. The people who don't know that context and use it to justify their openly hostile opinions? Absolute fucking morons
How dare anyone have an opinion in a free country,zis is ridiculous,put zeese soughts from your mind,escape is impossible,for you zee war is over,but first you go to our kamerad in China to zee re education camp.
Calling people with a different view,without making any attempt to discuss or understand that view morons is in itself moronic.Anyone with a different view to me is a moron,is moronic.I am intellectually superior to people with a different view is moronic.My view is the only 'normal' 'right' view is moronic.Shallow,blinkered and meretricious."
The irony of me stating an opinion that that you flame as closing down the opinions of others surely can't be lost on you. Even you're not that moronic. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The late great Jewish Comedian and scriptwriter(Yeshiva graduate,former Rabbi,)Jackie Mason used the offence is taken not given phrase when interviewed about his Jewish experience based comedy,which non Jewish people decided to be offended by on someone elses behalf.After 50 years in the business was he a moron?
He probably wasn't. The people who don't know that context and use it to justify their openly hostile opinions? Absolute fucking morons
How dare anyone have an opinion in a free country,zis is ridiculous,put zeese soughts from your mind,escape is impossible,for you zee war is over,but first you go to our kamerad in China to zee re education camp.
Calling people with a different view,without making any attempt to discuss or understand that view morons is in itself moronic.Anyone with a different view to me is a moron,is moronic.I am intellectually superior to people with a different view is moronic.My view is the only 'normal' 'right' view is moronic.Shallow,blinkered and meretricious."
Oh the irony |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Not really. I do think about what I post though and how I say it. But that’s only because I don’t want to start a kick off as there will always be one person who takes it wrong or doesn’t get my sarcastic sense of humour. As for what people think of me personally, unless they are friends of mine on here I have no fucks to give x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"about how others view you on the forum? Would it affect what you post?
Do you care enough to view others in a particular way? Notice/pay attention more often to posters?
"
I'm of that age where I'm all out of fucks for how a total stranger, on an Internet forum views me, positive or negative.
If what I post makes you laugh it's all good.
Same if what I post makes your eyes roll.
Do I judge other people? I try my damdest not to.
I tend to avoid the virus forum, I'm judgey AF about some of them loons. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
unless they’re feeding me, financing me or fucking me I have no interest 
