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Poster Above has text you
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By *inaTitzTV/TS 47 weeks ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"No idea, I aren't reading messages at this time of night. I'll get to it tomorrow. "
Her air fryer has become sentient and is demanding equal pay for fair work with the oven and she wants me to broker negotiations in time for tea to be saved  |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS 47 weeks ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"Prohibition was brought in and wine was no longer freely available  "
Fast moving thread and I hate to miss people, as it seems unfair.
He's organised a party and the bouncy castle hasn't turned up and so wants me to use my tits |
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By *avinaTVTV/TS 47 weeks ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
"Prohibition was brought in and wine was no longer freely available
Fast moving thread and I hate to miss people, as it seems unfair.
He's organised a party and the bouncy castle hasn't turned up and so wants me to use my tits "
Punctured tits! Needs a bicycle tyre repair kit! |
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By *avinaTVTV/TS 47 weeks ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
"Hanging from the curtain pole after failing to scale the walls like spiderman above a crying woman covered like a paper mache statue."
Quest for a penis turned up 3 old men with erectile dysfunction. |
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By (user no longer on site) 47 weeks ago
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"Hanging from the curtain pole after failing to scale the walls like spiderman above a crying woman covered like a paper mache statue.
Quest for a penis turned up 3 old men with erectile dysfunction."
  |
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"Hanging from the curtain pole after failing to scale the walls like spiderman above a crying woman covered like a paper mache statue.
Quest for a penis turned up 3 old men with erectile dysfunction.
"
She’s been stuck in her house for three days as her quest for penis took a dark turn. The three old men turned into 100s! They’re coming in their hoards like zombies with their wangers out. I need to rescue her from the curtain pole! |
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"Hanging from the curtain pole after failing to scale the walls like spiderman above a crying woman covered like a paper mache statue.
Quest for a penis turned up 3 old men with erectile dysfunction.
She’s been stuck in her house for three days as her quest for penis took a dark turn. The three old men turned into 100s! They’re coming in their hoards like zombies with their wangers out. I need to rescue her from the curtain pole!"
She slipped straight onto the wine bottle and now she can't get it out of her derriere |
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"Hanging from the curtain pole after failing to scale the walls like spiderman above a crying woman covered like a paper mache statue.
Quest for a penis turned up 3 old men with erectile dysfunction.
She’s been stuck in her house for three days as her quest for penis took a dark turn. The three old men turned into 100s! They’re coming in their hoards like zombies with their wangers out. I need to rescue her from the curtain pole!
She slipped straight onto the wine bottle and now she can't get it out of her derriere "
Oh, what if I don’t want to get it out but I still text you to come over  |
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"Hanging from the curtain pole after failing to scale the walls like spiderman above a crying woman covered like a paper mache statue.
Quest for a penis turned up 3 old men with erectile dysfunction.
She’s been stuck in her house for three days as her quest for penis took a dark turn. The three old men turned into 100s! They’re coming in their hoards like zombies with their wangers out. I need to rescue her from the curtain pole!
She slipped straight onto the wine bottle and now she can't get it out of her derriere
Oh, what if I don’t want to get it out but I still text you to come over "
As long as it's Red, I don't mind. Hate warm chardonnay |
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"Hanging from the curtain pole after failing to scale the walls like spiderman above a crying woman covered like a paper mache statue.
Quest for a penis turned up 3 old men with erectile dysfunction.
She’s been stuck in her house for three days as her quest for penis took a dark turn. The three old men turned into 100s! They’re coming in their hoards like zombies with their wangers out. I need to rescue her from the curtain pole!
She slipped straight onto the wine bottle and now she can't get it out of her derriere
Oh, what if I don’t want to get it out but I still text you to come over
As long as it's Red, I don't mind. Hate warm chardonnay "
Luckily for you I only drink red. |
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"Hanging from the curtain pole after failing to scale the walls like spiderman above a crying woman covered like a paper mache statue.
Quest for a penis turned up 3 old men with erectile dysfunction.
She’s been stuck in her house for three days as her quest for penis took a dark turn. The three old men turned into 100s! They’re coming in their hoards like zombies with their wangers out. I need to rescue her from the curtain pole!
She slipped straight onto the wine bottle and now she can't get it out of her derriere
Oh, what if I don’t want to get it out but I still text you to come over
As long as it's Red, I don't mind. Hate warm chardonnay
Luckily for you I only drink red. "
I'm on my way  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 47 weeks ago
|
"Hanging from the curtain pole after failing to scale the walls like spiderman above a crying woman covered like a paper mache statue.
Quest for a penis turned up 3 old men with erectile dysfunction.
She’s been stuck in her house for three days as her quest for penis took a dark turn. The three old men turned into 100s! They’re coming in their hoards like zombies with their wangers out. I need to rescue her from the curtain pole!
She slipped straight onto the wine bottle and now she can't get it out of her derriere
Oh, what if I don’t want to get it out but I still text you to come over
As long as it's Red, I don't mind. Hate warm chardonnay
Luckily for you I only drink red.
I'm on my way "
Has totalled his car and needs a driver swap. |
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"Hanging from the curtain pole after failing to scale the walls like spiderman above a crying woman covered like a paper mache statue.
Quest for a penis turned up 3 old men with erectile dysfunction.
She’s been stuck in her house for three days as her quest for penis took a dark turn. The three old men turned into 100s! They’re coming in their hoards like zombies with their wangers out. I need to rescue her from the curtain pole!
She slipped straight onto the wine bottle and now she can't get it out of her derriere
Oh, what if I don’t want to get it out but I still text you to come over
As long as it's Red, I don't mind. Hate warm chardonnay
Luckily for you I only drink red.
I'm on my way
Has totalled his car and needs a driver swap."
Please can you both come and ummm, help me?  |
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"Hanging from the curtain pole after failing to scale the walls like spiderman above a crying woman covered like a paper mache statue.
Quest for a penis turned up 3 old men with erectile dysfunction.
She’s been stuck in her house for three days as her quest for penis took a dark turn. The three old men turned into 100s! They’re coming in their hoards like zombies with their wangers out. I need to rescue her from the curtain pole!
She slipped straight onto the wine bottle and now she can't get it out of her derriere
Oh, what if I don’t want to get it out but I still text you to come over
As long as it's Red, I don't mind. Hate warm chardonnay
Luckily for you I only drink red.
I'm on my way
Has totalled his car and needs a driver swap.
Please can you both come and ummm, help me? "
You might be waiting a while |
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"One has a puncture
He's broken a heel and needs it gluing back on
His billboard has been censored and he needs a lawyer quick!
She was stood up at the airport on arrival "
She needed a dick and needed it now |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 47 weeks ago
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"He was out looking for billy
Iggy Pop had come for tea and he needed help serving the jelly and ice cream
She went jogging and got two black eyes  "
She opened the front door naked and the door came off its hinges. |
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"Bore a hole in the sand
Didn't quite get the hang of it yet and needed another reminder. 
M
Killed Fred and needs help burying the body "
Needed an emergency text rescue from a date with Mistletoes |
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By (user no longer on site) 47 weeks ago
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"We’re heading to comic con!!!!!"
Got a darth Vader toy stuck up his ass… and because there’s so much lube on his hands he can’t get a good grip so he can’t get it out… |
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"We’re heading to comic con!!!!!
Got a darth Vader toy stuck up his ass… and because there’s so much lube on his hands he can’t get a good grip so he can’t get it out… "
Wants advice on his latest pic before press release |
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"Removal of a Christmas tree from his rectum
Needs assistance with where to put his lightsabre...
Back has gone and is now stuck touching her toes with arse in the air.  "
Got his pensis stuck in the fence |
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By *avinaTVTV/TS 47 weeks ago
Transsexual Transylvania |
"Removal of a Christmas tree from his rectum
Needs assistance with where to put his lightsabre...
Back has gone and is now stuck touching her toes with arse in the air.
Got his pensis stuck in the fence "
Has accidentally glued small festive trees to her head. |
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