FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Are Forumites a cut above?
Are Forumites a cut above?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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As a single woman looking for single men, I see a marked difference in behaviour and attitudes when it comes to men on the forum and the men who message me plus the status updates I see. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No the forumites are just more ....
Someone really needs to put their hand over my mouth more often.
I am more than happy to volunteer"
Honestly think it's more likely to be the other way round, Brucey  |
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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago
Manchester (he/him) |
No, they’re really not.
The forums used to be a place to share thoughts, educate at times, have discussions and have a laugh.
Forumites are generally people that just post on the site, not better or worse than anyone else |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The forums are just a place to talk nonence and have a laugh amongst friends. I’ve made way better sexual connections outside of the forum though. It’s a bit interbred in here  "
Omg, it does get a bit 1ncestuous for sure!
I haven't really found any good connections outside the forum as yet. Just dross messages mainly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No the forumites are just more ....
Someone really needs to put their hand over my mouth more often.
I am more than happy to volunteer"
For the hundredth time can you lease leave me alone in the forum's.
Are you just doing it deliberately to wind me up?
Leave me alone. |
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"As a single woman looking for single men, I see a marked difference in behaviour and attitudes when it comes to men on the forum and the men who message me plus the status updates I see. "
We're not that bad on the forum,are? |
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"Wondered how different people find the forums compared to the rest of the site? "
I personally don't think the forums are for meeting people for sex reasons, not in my head anyway.
Its just somewhere I puddle about on and have a natter sometimes
MrsAbz |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I love the forums and over the years have made some great friends most of which have now sadly left but in all my time I've met very few for sex. All my meets came from the rest of the site"
It is upsetting when a favourite person leaves although they do often come back. I'm the same with guys I've "met". |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
I don't think they're a cut above. They're not really lower than others. Just, more likely to like talking about stuff online with a bunch of random people. Sometimes more "connection focused".
I do find it easier to find those with similar views on here though.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"No, they’re really not.
The forums used to be a place to share thoughts, educate at times, have discussions and have a laugh.
Forumites are generally people that just post on the site, not better or worse than anyone else"
I wonder if the answer is different for men and women though, Tea? Generally I don't find men on Fab respectful of women aside from the Forums. My POV anyway. I thought I'd gauge other perspectives. |
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I don't use any other part of the site so I can't really make a comparison.
I don't send first contact messages and every conversation in the last almost 4 years has been started by others, mostly through something I've said in the forums.
I use them as another filter because over time it really shows people in a different light.
I've met people who have been really nice in person for the hour that we were in the coffee shop but their forum antics show them up as horrendous individuals. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"As a single woman looking for single men, I see a marked difference in behaviour and attitudes when it comes to men on the forum and the men who message me plus the status updates I see.
We're not that bad on the forum,are?"
Men on the forum are generally fine, in my experience but I'm pretty much a Lounge woman. |
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"As a single woman looking for single men, I see a marked difference in behaviour and attitudes when it comes to men on the forum and the men who message me plus the status updates I see. "
Most of the site doesn't use the forums! But then there's still the fuckwit threads |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Interesting thought.
I've met maybe one or two people from the forums and some really amazing people who don't visit the forums so I can't say.
Maybe forumites might be more polite as they have an insight into the desires and not of a small sample of people on here. (I think forumites are a minority of the fab population) |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"When it comes to men I think the forum blokes are more respectful than the general man population of fab
Mrs "
That's been my experience but not sure it's everyone's. |
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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago
All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest |
No. It can facilitate openings for communication / contact but can also be accompanied by the pitfalls of a public forum. This is especially true for someone who exposes more of themselves.
If I were looking to meet again, I'd likely avoid the forums altogether for this, focusing on organised socials and club visits. Way too much drama and green eye on here. |
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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago
Redhill |
None of the men I have had the best meets even know that a forum exists. Just one, and that because I showed him the forum and he very, very occasionally posts.
So being a forumite is no guarantee at all. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"As a single woman looking for single men, I see a marked difference in behaviour and attitudes when it comes to men on the forum and the men who message me plus the status updates I see.
Most of the site doesn't use the forums! But then there's still the fuckwit threads "
I know they don't. I think the estimate is about 1-2%? I guess most people either don't know they exist or don't want to chat. |
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I have a vested interest in saying yes...but I'm not so sure.
I guess it's just the Forum allows us to see a bit more of each other and our personalities rather than one-off messages, but maybe we really are the crème de la crème.
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I think we all read the covid threads at the height of the pandemic.
That said a hell of a lot about the majority of people on here to me and what they are like and how they think.
Would def say a lot people are not a cut above the rest based on those interactions...
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In a word, no.
I think those that post to the forums represent a wide range of site users. Some you like, some you could do with out, some you're attracted to or not, some that are entertaining or not, etc etc
I think the reason the forumites seem more respectful, easier to engage with etc, is because of the sheers amount of folk on the main site who join thinking it's a place for a quick hookup and that everyone is gagging for it. When they find out that isn't the case, some throw the toys out of the pram adding to a poor example of their gender. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I think we all read the covid threads at the height of the pandemic.
That said a hell of a lot about the majority of people on here to me and what they are like and how they think.
Would def say a lot people are not a cut above the rest based on those interactions...
"
Lol I should have excluded the virus forum! Don't think I will venture there again... although it is interesting to see how different people are in the Lounge vs Politics/Virus. |
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Take away the fakes and the fantasists that use the site for the thrill of wanking to peoples pictures and you probably have a even balance ..
I definitely don’t think forum users are a cut above some maybe think they are. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There was a stat produced many years ago.. less than 1% of the sites users posted in the forum.
On such a small percentage it'd be karazee to base any judgement.
I do think the forum gives chance to hi-light the bad behaviour of (insert gender) giving a perception of mass bad behaviour of (insert gender)  |
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"I just wish the female single mum next door to me would just give in to sexual desire and take full advantage of my body, I can get away with saying this on a forum but not on Facebook  "
Well... I wouldn't want to be her. This is what I like about forums, people often show their true selves! |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"The forums are just a place to talk nonence and have a laugh amongst friends. I’ve made way better sexual connections outside of the forum though. It’s a bit interbred in here
Interbred?! "
The forums are the Norfolk/Bridgwater of Fab.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don't use any other part of the site so I can't really make a comparison.
I don't send first contact messages and every conversation in the last almost 4 years has been started by others, mostly through something I've said in the forums.
I use them as another filter because over time it really shows people in a different light.
I've met people who have been really nice in person for the hour that we were in the coffee shop but their forum antics show them up as horrendous individuals. "
I agree that I like to see how people are over time here - I often can't make my mind up for a while. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Wondered how different people find the forums compared to the rest of the site?
I personally don't think the forums are for meeting people for sex reasons, not in my head anyway.
Its just somewhere I puddle about on and have a natter sometimes
MrsAbz "
But you'd agree that many people do see them as a vehicle to meet for sex? There's a LOT of simping / flirting going on. Whether it amounts to anything is anyone's guess. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
The forums can be interesting to read,but I definitely do not believe regular users are a cut above any one else on here. In fact some are just playing the game with their public persona verses the actual personality in RL and pms.
It's a broad spectrum of different people and it covers a miniscule amount of users on fab over all.
And I think to believe they are a cut above anyone one on here would be naive,but then that where the 'fab elite' rubbish title comes from,and there are plenty who believe they are,or that others are and that there is such a thing on here. Maybe there is but I don't believe in it anyhow and anyone who does is not someone I want to interact with.
The one thing I do like about the forums is the wise variety of views and you get to see people who you may not have seen before. And it can be handy to find people who have similar views on things. I found a great friend through the forums and had some amazing meets,but then I've had great meets from people who don't ever enter here as well.
So I guess no I don't believe anyone on fab is a cut above anyone else. |
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The people are alright. 
I've never conversed deeply much with people here over the years. The rare occassions I have, it's been pleasant.
I don't really see people here any different to say, people in cams or people at non-forum socials. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"In a word, no.
I think those that post to the forums represent a wide range of site users. Some you like, some you could do with out, some you're attracted to or not, some that are entertaining or not, etc etc
I think the reason the forumites seem more respectful, easier to engage with etc, is because of the sheers amount of folk on the main site who join thinking it's a place for a quick hookup and that everyone is gagging for it. When they find out that isn't the case, some throw the toys out of the pram adding to a poor example of their gender."
I like this. Pretty much my view! |
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"The forums are just a place to talk nonence and have a laugh amongst friends. I’ve made way better sexual connections outside of the forum though. It’s a bit interbred in here
Interbred?! "
Well Rex is here…. He’s a whole different species |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"There was a stat produced many years ago.. less than 1% of the sites users posted in the forum.
On such a small percentage it'd be karazee to base any judgement.
I do think the forum gives chance to hi-light the bad behaviour of (insert gender) giving a perception of mass bad behaviour of (insert gender) "
Well I guess we can conclude that people on the forums like to chat. At least?
In terms of bad behaviour - I don't think you'd need the forums to highlight certain attitudes/behaviour. Just take a look at local updates in any city or any woman's inbox. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The forums are just a place to talk nonence and have a laugh amongst friends. I’ve made way better sexual connections outside of the forum though. It’s a bit interbred in here
Interbred?!
Well Rex is here…. He’s a whole different species "
He will find the thread now. Always happens! |
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"Cut above. No, not at all. We witness why everyday. Multiple times a day. Twats here just like on other parts of the site.
"
Indeed there's a difference between the regulars and the irregular ones! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Way I see fab.
You have your 'pick me' people, hot pics.
The popular ones, these are the ones too busy having the sex stuff to do anything else.
Then the weirdos, the misfits, this is the forums. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Cut above. No, not at all. We witness why everyday. Multiple times a day. Twats here just like on other parts of the site.
"
Seems like 90% twats in my box. But could be me, admittedly.  |
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"Way I see fab.
You have your 'pick me' people, hot pics.
The popular ones, these are the ones too busy having the sex stuff to do anything else.
Then the weirdos, the misfits, this is the forums. "
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Way I see fab.
You have your 'pick me' people, hot pics.
The popular ones, these are the ones too busy having the sex stuff to do anything else.
Then the weirdos, the misfits, this is the forums. "
So no-one here is having the sex or on hot pics - just too busy nattering. Got it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Way I see fab.
You have your 'pick me' people, hot pics.
The popular ones, these are the ones too busy having the sex stuff to do anything else.
Then the weirdos, the misfits, this is the forums.
So no-one here is having the sex or on hot pics - just too busy nattering. Got it. "
You know what they say.
Those that talk about it.... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Way I see fab.
You have your 'pick me' people, hot pics.
The popular ones, these are the ones too busy having the sex stuff to do anything else.
Then the weirdos, the misfits, this is the forums.
So no-one here is having the sex or on hot pics - just too busy nattering. Got it.
You know what they say.
Those that talk about it...."
Teach it? Oh. Hang on. Getting confused. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Way I see fab.
You have your 'pick me' people, hot pics.
The popular ones, these are the ones too busy having the sex stuff to do anything else.
Then the weirdos, the misfits, this is the forums.
So no-one here is having the sex or on hot pics - just too busy nattering. Got it.
You know what they say.
Those that talk about it....
Teach it? Oh. Hang on. Getting confused. "
Aren't doing it!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Forum people, will be nicer in general in messages as they have an image to uphold.
A random guy isn't gonna care if you make a thread about him, a regular forum user might... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Way I see fab.
You have your 'pick me' people, hot pics.
The popular ones, these are the ones too busy having the sex stuff to do anything else.
Then the weirdos, the misfits, this is the forums.
So no-one here is having the sex or on hot pics - just too busy nattering. Got it.
You know what they say.
Those that talk about it....
Teach it? Oh. Hang on. Getting confused.
Aren't doing it!
"
Oh, I'm sorry |
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"Wondered how different people find the forums compared to the rest of the site?
I personally don't think the forums are for meeting people for sex reasons, not in my head anyway.
Its just somewhere I puddle about on and have a natter sometimes
MrsAbz
But you'd agree that many people do see them as a vehicle to meet for sex? There's a LOT of simping / flirting going on. Whether it amounts to anything is anyone's guess. "
I guess many people do see it that way. Which is fine for them and hope they succeed
Mostly though, the forum is just random chatter with the odd decent debate thrown in, as far as I can see.
I'm happy for people if it means more to them though
MrsAbz |
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"The forums are just a place to talk nonence and have a laugh amongst friends. I’ve made way better sexual connections outside of the forum though. It’s a bit interbred in here "
This
We chat shit on here and we shoot in bigger barrels when fishing for extras
K |
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"No the forumites are just more ....
Someone really needs to put their hand over my mouth more often.
I am more than happy to volunteer
Honestly think it's more likely to be the other way round, Brucey "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a single woman looking for single men, I see a marked difference in behaviour and attitudes when it comes to men on the forum and the men who message me plus the status updates I see. "
The anonymity of a private message, man’s greatest downfall!
Definitely better people on the forum, shows a bit of humanity on display |
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By *.T.Man
over a year ago
Glasgow |
Get yourself Platinum membership, apparently it unlocks all the better people, gives you access to the guaranteed top notch shags forums and allows you to view hidden friends only profiles*
some/all of that may not be true... |
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"Regular forumites are definitely more clued in as they have read the endless why doesn't anyone message me back threads etc. Plus you have seen some of their personality and sense of humour."
This is a good point. |
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"Get yourself Platinum membership, apparently it unlocks all the better people, gives you access to the guaranteed top notch shags forums and allows you to view hidden friends only profiles*
some/all of that may not be true..."
*howls with laughter* |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Get yourself Platinum membership, apparently it unlocks all the better people, gives you access to the guaranteed top notch shags forums and allows you to view hidden friends only profiles*
some/all of that may not be true..."
Oh totes. The hidden forums are worth every penny, tom, dick and ...lots of dick.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Only the créme dé la crême post on the Forums (with notable exceptions).
Especially the TVs. Absolutely elite.
 "
Some of them also have elite level jokes, I've found. |
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The only reason some Men are more respectful on the forums is because the read them and see replies from Women/couples and act accordingly, they also know they will come across you more often and a lot of Women talk!
A lot of the random messages from non forum users generally don't give a fuck as they wont come across you again after sending the message, Just my opinion |
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Think some forums are brilliant for arranging meets, what's happening in the club scene and without question a brilliant tool for meet ups on swingers holidays.
By and large these forums do not attract experts, just folks who have actual done it or want to !!
We did meet a highly vocal, opinionated forum expert at a club and for some unknown reason they didn't seem so expert or vocal when we introduced ourselves and said we recognised their names from a certain forum thread.
It was as if we had touched them with a cattle prod. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The only reason some Men are more respectful on the forums is because the read them and see replies from Women/couples and act accordingly, they also know they will come across you more often and a lot of Women talk!
A lot of the random messages from non forum users generally don't give a fuck as they wont come across you again after sending the message, Just my opinion "
Wow. Even more cynical than Raven! |
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"Way I see fab.
You have your 'pick me' people, hot pics.
The popular ones, these are the ones too busy having the sex stuff to do anything else.
Then the weirdos, the misfits, this is the forums. "
Attacked |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only reason some Men are more respectful on the forums is because the read them and see replies from Women/couples and act accordingly, they also know they will come across you more often and a lot of Women talk!
A lot of the random messages from non forum users generally don't give a fuck as they wont come across you again after sending the message, Just my opinion
Wow. Even more cynical than Raven! "
You say cynical.
I say realistic.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The only reason some Men are more respectful on the forums is because the read them and see replies from Women/couples and act accordingly, they also know they will come across you more often and a lot of Women talk!
A lot of the random messages from non forum users generally don't give a fuck as they wont come across you again after sending the message, Just my opinion
Wow. Even more cynical than Raven!
You say cynical.
I say realistic.
"
Let's call the whole thing off.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The only reason some Men are more respectful on the forums is because the read them and see replies from Women/couples and act accordingly, they also know they will come across you more often and a lot of Women talk!
A lot of the random messages from non forum users generally don't give a fuck as they wont come across you again after sending the message, Just my opinion
Wow. Even more cynical than Raven!
You say cynical.
I say realistic.
Let's call the whole thing off...."
The forums?
Seems a tad drastic but ok. |
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By *an1978Woman
over a year ago
GONE/TIMEOUT (No DMs please) |
I like the forums because you get a more rounded idea of a person.
If someone can make me laugh out loud on a thread about biscuts,then they are already above the common man.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"The only reason some Men are more respectful on the forums is because the read them and see replies from Women/couples and act accordingly, they also know they will come across you more often and a lot of Women talk!
A lot of the random messages from non forum users generally don't give a fuck as they wont come across you again after sending the message, Just my opinion
Wow. Even more cynical than Raven!
You say cynical.
I say realistic.
Let's call the whole thing off....
The forums?
Seems a tad drastic but ok. "
I'm humming the song now... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"People in the forums seem generally more conversational.
Only issue is that there seems to be a correlation between me posting in the forums and men sending me sausage pics"
No way? Me too! |
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By *aked2sumCouple
over a year ago
playa del ingles |
"People in the forums seem generally more conversational.
Only issue is that there seems to be a correlation between me posting in the forums and men sending me sausage pics"
I think you confrontational not conversational |
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"Wondered how different people find the forums compared to the rest of the site? "
Maybe. Based on the responses so far people's experiences are different. I don't find the fora any more friendly than non forum users. If anything quite the reverse. I have a few conversation buddies out of the fora. Quite a few seem to think, as the label of this thread suggests that fora users are better. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I like the forums because you get a more rounded idea of a person.
If someone can make me laugh out loud on a thread about biscuts,then they are already above the common man.
"
I like that side of the forums, it makes it easy to start conversations I think. |
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By *otSoPoshWoman
over a year ago
In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon |
"The only reason some Men are more respectful on the forums is because the read them and see replies from Women/couples and act accordingly, they also know they will come across you more often and a lot of Women talk!
A lot of the random messages from non forum users generally don't give a fuck as they wont come across you again after sending the message, Just my opinion "
I actually agree with all of this... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Wondered how different people find the forums compared to the rest of the site?
Maybe. Based on the responses so far people's experiences are different. I don't find the fora any more friendly than non forum users. If anything quite the reverse. I have a few conversation buddies out of the fora. Quite a few seem to think, as the label of this thread suggests that fora users are better. "
The title is a question, to start discussion. |
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"Forumites a cut above"?
Not at all, with under 2% of the site represented there possibly isn't even a fair reflection of those using Fab.
I seem to think there are some regulars who on the female side seem sceptical of integrity on the single male side, that said, I cannot really judge whether this is a direct consequence of fellas sending out poor or even downright rude messages to the ladies in general, let alone those that quite often make their feelings known.
Personally I can't do any more than "be me" and write things as fairly and honestly as I do.
The forums are entertaining with a wide range of topics, serious and some more 'tongue in cheek' and I probably spend more than half my 'Fab time' reading up on diverse matters here and contributing as and when I feel it appropriate and time allows.
Fab without forums would still work, that I am convinced of but I'd feel something was missing if they were to now suddenly cease.
As to whether it actually leads to meeting someone or some others, that remains to be seen for many of us I guess. It doesn't have to but no doubt the forums allow people to become acquainted in a very different way in comparison to private messages.
As such, I enjoy the diversity of the forums and hope I don't offend anybody along the way , well, not too much |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I feel the folk on the forum are much more harsh than the rest of the site. And see themselves as slightly elevated.. mainly because we can construct coherent sentences.
While this may sound critical, I count myself in this category also. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I feel the folk on the forum are much more harsh than the rest of the site. And see themselves as slightly elevated.. mainly because we can construct coherent sentences.
While this may sound critical, I count myself in this category also. "
I definitely think that attitude is here. It's partly why I posed the question. But I can't help but like coherent sentences. And full stops. What can I do? |
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I've no idea where the Forums are, where would I find them? 
My observation, some good people, some honest people, some sincere people, some bell ends, some ass lickers, some intelligent people and some half wits, some funny, some helpful and grounded.
Just like all of life, just like everywhere you go.
An eclectic mix.
My forum experience has been good so far.
Make of that what you will. |
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In what ways? Are the women a cut above? 
lol 