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Your views please
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Read a couple of things on social media ( so big pinch of salt )recently regarding expectations on dates. The first was a woman refusing to get out of the car because she didn’t think the restaurant her date had selected was good enough for a first date. The second was a woman saying that a man must spend $200 dollars on a date for her to even turn up. Both were in the US. I’m sure this type of thing is not limited to women nor the US.
So , I’m curious as a well rounded and diverse cross section of society, what are your thoughts? Ever experienced anything similar. Do you have minimum criteria for a date? |
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To be honest on a first date , I would be much more comfortable if we went somewhere inexpensive , if we didn't get on , I would feel much better if it was less than £30 spent on the date than £100. Plus if it was somewhere hyper expensive I couldn't help feeling that the person was trying to show off their wealth, and I do not find that attractive in the slightest |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I reckon there’s a social media trend where women are told that men should be splashing money on them or else they simply shouldn’t waste their time. It seems very transactional to me, and makes me happy to not be in the dating scene.
Personally, I feel if one needs another person to take them to otherwise out of their reach type of experiences or dates, one should evaluate why they can’t afford those things — if that’s a priority in one’s life and focus on the root cause preventing them from enjoying those ripe of experiences rather than using others to afford those type of experiences.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Wow USA at large.
Expect me to like what I see as disappointed I will be when your younger photos on profile do not match..
A public place.. Can be anywhere. Living by the sea we can just sit on the dock of the bay.
If you cannot be bothered to turn up respectful I will walk. Had a few socials of scruffs and at least be clean.
I would expect nothing else. The above are standards.
I would not jump cause you think a social means legs open. Again I will walk. |
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Oh god no, I hate all that bollocks one hand we've women fighting for equality and on another women demanding men do as they wish.
Split costs, go wherever, as long as you get along & have a good time what's it matter.
I'll happily go for a Costa & Subway if I liked the person.
Mrs |
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I don’t do dates but I imagine dinner for a first date to be a stuff out of my worst nightmare.
Just a coffee is fine, a walk, or maybe a drink, and honestly afterwards because it’s ok if there’s no mutual attraction. |
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Is this like the 'if you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best' attitude.?
My expectations of a date are that the person turns up on time, is clean, respectful and happy to pay half at a venue that we could both afford.
I won't be going on any dates though |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
"My expectations of a date are that the person turns up on time, is clean, respectful and happy to pay half at a venue that we could both afford. "
This for me too. And no bleating on about past women. |
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Tbh I haven't taken anyone to a restaurant on a first date in years and years. I always tried to find something to do, might not even cost a thing and if they don't like that well they aren't for me anyways and will be told that. When I met my better half our first date was to a trampoline centre! |
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"My expectations of a date are that the person turns up on time, is clean, respectful and happy to pay half at a venue that we could both afford.
This for me too. And no bleating on about past women."
Ooo no especially if they're bitter about them. |
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I rarely go to a restaurant on a first date.
Generally these days the date will come from swiping right so the first date is for drinks. If the chemistry is there and we both have the time we might then extend it to food. There is nothing more cringey than being stuck in a restaurant with someone and either of you aren’t feeling it and want to escape. |
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Jesus no. The exact opposite. Back in the days when I was dating I’d arrange an hour over a coffee to get a feel for the person in person. So neither had wasted time and money if there was no actual chemistry. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Read a couple of things on social media ( so big pinch of salt )recently regarding expectations on dates. The first was a woman refusing to get out of the car because she didn’t think the restaurant her date had selected was good enough for a first date. The second was a woman saying that a man must spend $200 dollars on a date for her to even turn up. Both were in the US. I’m sure this type of thing is not limited to women nor the US.
So , I’m curious as a well rounded and diverse cross section of society, what are your thoughts? Ever experienced anything similar. Do you have minimum criteria for a date?"
If it works for them.. crack on
Sounds like gold diggers to me  |
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I wouldn't expect to be taken somewhere I didn't like though. A person would have made a huge misjudgement if they took me to a football match or any sporting event, wanted me to sit in a bar with a load of his friends or thought an evening of X box would woo me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don’t do dates but I imagine dinner for a first date to be a stuff out of my worst nightmare.
Just a coffee is fine, a walk, or maybe a drink, and honestly afterwards because it’s ok if there’s no mutual attraction. "
Agreed! All I expect is someone who looks like his pic, is clean and happy to make an effort at being good company by chatting! |
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By *TG3Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"Read a couple of things on social media ( so big pinch of salt )recently regarding expectations on dates. The first was a woman refusing to get out of the car because she didn’t think the restaurant her date had selected was good enough for a first date. The second was a woman saying that a man must spend $200 dollars on a date for her to even turn up. Both were in the US. I’m sure this type of thing is not limited to women nor the US.
So , I’m curious as a well rounded and diverse cross section of society, what are your thoughts? Ever experienced anything similar. Do you have minimum criteria for a date?"
some couples expect a certain standard of hotel for meets and won't accept anything less  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh and also you don't want to be thinking social media is representative of the wider population. We're not all refusing to get out of bed for less than £10,000"
I think you will find that my fees are higher  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sounds like extreme expectations, and not something I have experienced. You make an effort on a date but attitude, presentation and humour are surely key (as opposed to where you go). It's nice to go to nice places but surely that's not the 1st thing you judge someone on? |
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I wouldn't be averse to going for a meal on a first date if it was pre agreed. It does make it a bit awkward if you're not getting along during the starter. That's when you skip dessert and coffee and head home to deal with the 'emergency'  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I’m quite happy for my date to stay on the car in that situation. I’ll eat double and I know the cars safe from traffic wardens.
Seriously though my last girlfriend like this but way more scuttle. It’s not a good way to be and we didn’t last. |
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"So…..McDonald’s isn’t a good first date I’m presuming then?
Ahhhh…..shit…..
Tbh a milkshake and a McFlurry would be totally fine for me ( not that you’d wanna date me lol)"
TBF I’d be all for this. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I usually go halves on any drinks or meals, or I offer and am refused. Either is fine. I want someone to spend time with, I couldn't care less how much money they've got as long as they're not bothered that I don't have much. |
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"I don’t do dates but I imagine dinner for a first date to be a stuff out of my worst nightmare.
Just a coffee is fine, a walk, or maybe a drink, and honestly afterwards because it’s ok if there’s no mutual attraction. "
It is a nightmare. I did it once from here. Met for dinner. Knew as soon as I saw him he wasn’t for me and had to sit and have dinner. He was a nice person so I didn’t have the heart to just leave, and he’d travelled quite a way.
Never again. |
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This sounds riduculously high maintainance to me.
Like others have said, what im bothered about on a date is them being on time (or at least keep me posted if going to be late), wanting to spend time with me and get to know each other better. I would feel really uncomfortable if we went somewhere that was out of my price range to pay for my share. X  |
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"Read a couple of things on social media ( so big pinch of salt )recently regarding expectations on dates. The first was a woman refusing to get out of the car because she didn’t think the restaurant her date had selected was good enough for a first date. The second was a woman saying that a man must spend $200 dollars on a date for her to even turn up. Both were in the US. I’m sure this type of thing is not limited to women nor the US.
So , I’m curious as a well rounded and diverse cross section of society, what are your thoughts? Ever experienced anything similar. Do you have minimum criteria for a date?"
My thoughts are that these kind of acts are absolutely brilliant and priceless.
What’s better than to find out on an early date what you’re date is really like.
Same as a car test drive and it breaking down, if you still buy it and take it home you can’t say you weren’t warned  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Chemistry.
Respect.
No isms.
No phone usage.
No expectations about what happens after.
That's it really. I'm not too high maintenance.  "
Unrelated - but that latest photo - you're the spitting image of a friend of mine. It's uncanny. |
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I reckon there’s a social media trend where women are told that men should be splashing money on them or else they simply shouldn’t waste their time. It seems very transactional to me, and makes me happy to not be in the dating scene.
Personally, I feel if one needs another person to take them to otherwise out of their reach type of experiences or dates, one should evaluate why they can’t afford those things — if that’s a priority in one’s life and focus on the root cause preventing them from enjoying those ripe of experiences rather than using others to afford those type of experiences.
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De acuerdo!
I'm so glad I don't need to go out dating! Our first "date" was in Starbucks. We had coffee (me), hot chocolate (him) and shared a piece of cake. I have no idea if we went halves or what but we've shared the cost of everything pretty much forevermore since then. |
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Many years ago, agreed to meet a guy for drinks. Already knew each other in passing, through mutual friends. I suggested local pub and was told it was 'cheap'. He wanted to try new speakeasy bar in town. He was very nice at first, until group of workmates arrived, when he became a total snob. I left and paid my 1/2 of the bill just before he tried to put a £100 worth of bubbly on it.
Since then, it's coffee or local pub.
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