FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Are you coming across online as you are in real life?
Are you coming across online as you are in real life?
Jump to: Newest in thread
Anywhere really, not just on Fab.
Dating profiles, public chats and forums...etc.
***
Introverts coming through worse than they are?
Extroverts coming through better than they are?
Psychopaths coming through as nice people?
Bullies coming through as popular ones?
Do you notice or care when you are being misjudged and ignored?
Are you being labeled as weird or geek when you try to get in the circle with the popular ones?
Is it possible you misjudged yourself and they are right?
No deep or personal meaning here, just interested about opinions and experiences.
No name calling or arguments please!
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Probably not.
Worse or better?
Not sure about that. Real life interaction is so different. You can see facial expressions, pick up on body language, gauge physical attraction etc. "
Obviously it's harder to judge based on the lack of the above mentioned.
You can be the nicest man/woman on the planet, but some people online still will think you are the opposite.
When that happens, then you start to think, Why?
I know people who are extremely nice online, but not even close in real life.
Also know people are extremely unpopular online, but in real life the opposite.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Slightly less dull than in real life I'd say, although that is being damned by faint praise."
Everybody is trying to look more interesting or highlighting their interesting side in swinging or dating.
My attempts are hit and miss, but mostly miss. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I'm far less wordy in person but apart from that, I'd like to think I'm being myself as much as I can be in any given situation
I'm shy meeting new people online and offline. Makes no difference. Plus, it can be tricky as a shy introvert because obviously people like me tend to communicate better online, and all of that can go out of the window the moment I actually start talking to someone
It does bother me being misjudged based on this because I know I can make awful first impressions sometimes :/
I think I also misjudge myself a lot too so my answer to this feels sort of complicated |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Do I come across as miserable, boring git? If so yes
Is it bothering you, if so?
Not really but then I'm off my meds "
Well, I took Tramadol in the last one week, so it might have reflected on my online presence. Off of it now. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I think I'm generally the same, maybe more chatty on here I'm a little quiet in real life, plus in real life I can't flirt for shit, I can a little online.
I tend to prewarn people of this though.
Mrs |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think I come across worse online tha I am in real life.
And I think people's personalities are bloody hard to gauge online. So much communication lost in the form of black and white text.
I think I'm quite easy going and soft and an open book. But that's not what forumites get. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm far less wordy in person but apart from that, I'd like to think I'm being myself as much as I can be in any given situation
I'm shy meeting new people online and offline. Makes no difference. Plus, it can be tricky as a shy introvert because obviously people like me tend to communicate better online, and all of that can go out of the window the moment I actually start talking to someone
It does bother me being misjudged based on this because I know I can make awful first impressions sometimes :/
I think I also misjudge myself a lot too so my answer to this feels sort of complicated"
I'm introvert, but kind of the opposite than you.
I'm not shy in a real one to one situation. I would say kind of interesting too, because of my life journeys, knowledge and experiences. Group socials would be a different matter, but in group meets I would find my confidence fast as a shark. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think I come across worse online tha I am in real life.
And I think people's personalities are bloody hard to gauge online. So much communication lost in the form of black and white text.
I think I'm quite easy going and soft and an open book. But that's not what forumites get."
You come across how you intend to I guess.
You are one of the popular kids after all.
 |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think I come across worse online tha I am in real life.
And I think people's personalities are bloody hard to gauge online. So much communication lost in the form of black and white text.
I think I'm quite easy going and soft and an open book. But that's not what forumites get."
And here I was crushing on your forum persona because you give no fucks whatsoever.
Re: original post - all anyone is ever going to see online are aspects of a person. Even if we TRY to be absolutely authentic.
Although I am actually a catfish and don’t exist in real life in any form whatsoever. (J/k, mods please don’t ban me…) |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Away for Christmas |
I am, but not all of me. The person I am on the forum is only part of the person I am in in reality. The only difference is you see more of what is me in person.
I just don't present the parts people don't get to see. Only so much can be seen through the forum anyway. The little things and nuances.
Basically this is me, you see what is me but there is so much more in addition to what the forum sees. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I’m probably everything you think I am based on me online persona and worse in person. I don’t know. But I spend time with people that like me for me. It’s a more peaceful life. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’m probably everything you think I am based on me online persona and worse in person. I don’t know. But I spend time with people that like me for me. It’s a more peaceful life. "
You’re much funnier irl imo idk |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I'm pretty much the same in real life.
I don't live for confrontation or validation and I'm not someone who says it as it is because that often means you have no thought for the consequences of your words.
I often point out the blindingly obvious or the elephant in the room and laugh at the emperor's New clothes and I'm all for equality and balance. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm not shy in a real one to one situation. I would say kind of interesting too, because of my life journeys, knowledge and experiences. Group socials would be a different matter, but in group meets I would find my confidence fast as a shark."
I think the shyness is definitely a deciding factor with this. I find it very difficult to appear interesting because I open up slowly to people so I'm wondering if I also have a habit of trying too hard online in that respect
Not on purpose, of course. But if I said as much online as I usually say in person then my profile would be blank and I wouldn't even writing this |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
How I am online is different to how I am in person, in person im quite in public yet extremely confident and extroverted with people I’m Comfortable, online I act how I would if I had the confidence |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Anywhere really, not just on Fab.
Dating profiles, public chats and forums...etc.
***
Introverts coming through worse than they are?
Extroverts coming through better than they are?
Psychopaths coming through as nice people?
Bullies coming through as popular ones?
Do you notice or care when you are being misjudged and ignored?
Are you being labeled as weird or geek when you try to get in the circle with the popular ones?
Is it possible you misjudged yourself and they are right?
No deep or personal meaning here, just interested about opinions and experiences.
No name calling or arguments please!
"
At forum socials, the people who like me online chatted to me in person. The people who don't, didn't. Some said they were surprised I'm not a builder called Derek.
It doesn't matter either way. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I’m probably everything you think I am based on me online persona and worse in person. I don’t know. But I spend time with people that like me for me. It’s a more peaceful life. "
You are coming across chilled,funny and confident online.
Probably the most approachable from the cool kids.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm not shy in a real one to one situation. I would say kind of interesting too, because of my life journeys, knowledge and experiences. Group socials would be a different matter, but in group meets I would find my confidence fast as a shark.
I think the shyness is definitely a deciding factor with this. I find it very difficult to appear interesting because I open up slowly to people so I'm wondering if I also have a habit of trying too hard online in that respect
Not on purpose, of course. But if I said as much online as I usually say in person then my profile would be blank and I wouldn't even writing this"
It is sometimes the main issue, if someone is introvert. Trying to show of a little bit, but not really good with it. People taking it as rude or socially awkward. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I’m probably everything you think I am based on me online persona and worse in person. I don’t know. But I spend time with people that like me for me. It’s a more peaceful life. "
I think you're the same. In a good way. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I am, but not all of me. The person I am on the forum is only part of the person I am in in reality. The only difference is you see more of what is me in person.
I just don't present the parts people don't get to see. Only so much can be seen through the forum anyway. The little things and nuances.
Basically this is me, you see what is me but there is so much more in addition to what the forum sees. "
You are an enigma that's for sure x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Anywhere really, not just on Fab.
Dating profiles, public chats and forums...etc.
***
Introverts coming through worse than they are?
Extroverts coming through better than they are?
Psychopaths coming through as nice people?
Bullies coming through as popular ones?
Do you notice or care when you are being misjudged and ignored?
Are you being labeled as weird or geek when you try to get in the circle with the popular ones?
Is it possible you misjudged yourself and they are right?
No deep or personal meaning here, just interested about opinions and experiences.
No name calling or arguments please!
At forum socials, the people who like me online chatted to me in person. The people who don't, didn't. Some said they were surprised I'm not a builder called Derek.
It doesn't matter either way."
That was rude, but a compliment in some way.
I'd take it like this
    |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Online is closer to my inside voice than how I behave in real life.
Well, on a swinger site it happens naturally I think."
Nah. I think people blow smoke in order to get laid. I used to moderate myself a bit more. I've stopped giving a fuck  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
I don't really get labelled oft, if at all.
Am I the same here as I am face to face? I guess it depends on who the person I'm interacting with is. There are things I'd never dream of discussing or sharing in different aspects of my life. The more relaxed I am, the more likely you are to see different facets of me that make up who I am (this being one of them).
I do type exactly as I talk in real life. Which is either a good or bad thing.
I think I'm quite curious and friendly to a certain extent wherever you catch me.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Dick in person dick on line. Only difference beung, I get a lot less bans in person....
Can confirm"
Fluffy Cow thanks for the confirmation was looking for smoke to be blown up my arse, but hey ho |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
In real life Im sarcastic, irreverent, dismissive of authority, low boredom threshold, but multi faceted so if theres a serious conversation - i will try to respect that … youd be better off meeting me and finding out… theres a million different me’s depending on a million different things and i think Joolsandthebrain said - its hard to get all that on paper/online. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I think it is difficult to get your personality across in text. I try to write in the same style that I speak but of course, people can't see my facial expressions or hear my voice intonations.
But on the flipside, I find it easier to say intimate things by typing rather than speaking them |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Not sure how I come across,I try to be me as much as possible,but tone and sincerity is difficult to do in text.
It's mostly just sarcasm "
People don't get sarcasm in text.
Learned it in a hard way. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I do think that if you observe someone on line for a long period you can get an idea of how they are in real life. Small tells give things away"
Don’t you dare tell people im actually nice and not as thick as 2 short planks!!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Dick in person dick on line. Only difference beung, I get a lot less bans in person....
Can confirm
Fluffy Cow thanks for the confirmation was looking for smoke to be blown up my arse, but hey ho "
Moo |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I do think that if you observe someone on line for a long period you can get an idea of how they are in real life. Small tells give things away
Don’t you dare tell people im actually nice and not as thick as 2 short planks!!! "
Ok if you keep it quiet about me it's a deal.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I do think that if you observe someone on line for a long period you can get an idea of how they are in real life. Small tells give things away
Don’t you dare tell people im actually nice and not as thick as 2 short planks!!!
Ok if you keep it quiet about me it's a deal. "
You’re fine - I can keep a secret…. Not sure about all the people I told though!! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I do think that if you observe someone on line for a long period you can get an idea of how they are in real life. Small tells give things away"
It might tell you if they are desperate or having a rough patch. If some jokes are too dirty or nobody gets sarcasm and irony in jokes. Most will label them weird or rude. Even though that person might be nicer than most, just trying to fit in on a swinging site. I came across some prude people here for my surprise. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Dick in person dick on line. Only difference beung, I get a lot less bans in person....
Can confirm
Fluffy Cow thanks for the confirmation was looking for smoke to be blown up my arse, but hey ho
Moo "
A chicken that moo's! Well I never, wonders never cease
MrsAbz |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Dick in person dick on line. Only difference beung, I get a lot less bans in person....
Can confirm
Fluffy Cow thanks for the confirmation was looking for smoke to be blown up my arse, but hey ho
Moo
A chicken that moo's! Well I never, wonders never cease
MrsAbz "
Thats the mysterious way of fab |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Dick in person dick on line. Only difference beung, I get a lot less bans in person....
Can confirm
Fluffy Cow thanks for the confirmation was looking for smoke to be blown up my arse, but hey ho
Moo
A chicken that moo's! Well I never, wonders never cease
MrsAbz
Thats the mysterious way of fab "
Must be a fab chicken - says they only cluck but actually enjoys the odd moo too
MrsAbz |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Probably a bit. I am a flirt and a wind up merchant.
But people like me in real life and not on here so something's mismatched "
You are the coolest of the cool kids here for most. Even your less interesting threads are popular.
Like which foot I should put in my flip flops first? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Probably a bit. I am a flirt and a wind up merchant.
But people like me in real life and not on here so something's mismatched
You are the coolest of the cool kids here for most. Even your less interesting threads are popular.
Like which foot I should put in my flip flops first? "
Obviously it was a joke, not mocking. Just forgot the smileys.
Here |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Open 80%
Conscientious 55%
Extraversion 45%
Agreeableness 75%
Neuroticism 25%
That's my 'Big 5' Personality trait scores.
Conscientious is the bit I find hardest. ADHD doesn't help I don't think.
Bit sads if you don't like me. Can talk about if you want? No ok then. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Open 80%
Conscientious 55%
Extraversion 45%
Agreeableness 75%
Neuroticism 25%
That's my 'Big 5' Personality trait scores.
Conscientious is the bit I find hardest. ADHD doesn't help I don't think.
Bit sads if you don't like me. Can talk about if you want? No ok then."
280% of real man.
I understand. So you do your best, but won't lose sleep about it, if some people obviously blanking you or judging you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think I often assume that people are always comfortable and good at communicating online because I find it quite easy. But many people are just rubbish at it - so they're not going to be as relaxed nor convey a true account of themselves. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think I often assume that people are always comfortable and good at communicating online because I find it quite easy. But many people are just rubbish at it - so they're not going to be as relaxed nor convey a true account of themselves. "
Sometimes trying hard making things look weird. Then it goes down on levels of judgments in general. Mostly it works like:
''Weird isn't good.
Something isn't good is bad.
Bad is rude.''
It's a bit like when pretty women convincing each other. The ugly guy is the creep and the cute guy is definitely not like Ted Bundy.
I know ugly is subjective, but handsomeness normally slightly less subjective. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Dick in person dick on line. Only difference beung, I get a lot less bans in person....
Can confirm
Fluffy Cow thanks for the confirmation was looking for smoke to be blown up my arse, but hey ho
Moo
A chicken that moo's! Well I never, wonders never cease
MrsAbz
Thats the mysterious way of fab
Must be a fab chicken - says they only cluck but actually enjoys the odd moo too
MrsAbz "
Have you ever seen a cow plop out a egg, or a chicken a calf..... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think I come across worse online tha I am in real life.
And I think people's personalities are bloody hard to gauge online. So much communication lost in the form of black and white text.
I think I'm quite easy going and soft and an open book. But that's not what forumites get.
You come across how you intend to I guess.
You are one of the popular kids after all.
"
FFS popular????
Define popular?
Let's see if your version of popular matches mine.
Oh now I'm in a shit mood. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think I come across worse online tha I am in real life.
And I think people's personalities are bloody hard to gauge online. So much communication lost in the form of black and white text.
I think I'm quite easy going and soft and an open book. But that's not what forumites get.
You come across how you intend to I guess.
You are one of the popular kids after all.
FFS popular????
Define popular?
Let's see if your version of popular matches mine.
Oh now I'm in a shit mood."
I meant it as a compliment.
People like you. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I think I come across worse online tha I am in real life.
And I think people's personalities are bloody hard to gauge online. So much communication lost in the form of black and white text.
I think I'm quite easy going and soft and an open book. But that's not what forumites get.
You come across how you intend to I guess.
You are one of the popular kids after all.
FFS popular????
Define popular?
Let's see if your version of popular matches mine.
Oh now I'm in a shit mood.
I meant it as a compliment.
People like you."
Really? I always think the opposite to be honest.
But seriously I the being labelled as popular. I think it's bollocks. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think I come across worse online tha I am in real life.
And I think people's personalities are bloody hard to gauge online. So much communication lost in the form of black and white text.
I think I'm quite easy going and soft and an open book. But that's not what forumites get.
You come across how you intend to I guess.
You are one of the popular kids after all.
FFS popular????
Define popular?
Let's see if your version of popular matches mine.
Oh now I'm in a shit mood.
I meant it as a compliment.
People like you.
Really? I always think the opposite to be honest.
But seriously I the being labelled as popular. I think it's bollocks."
You are naughty but nice for most I guess. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I'm much the same everywhere.
Blunt, word vomity, swinging between happily telling everyone everything and reclusing in a corner.
I used to think I was worse online, but it's more that other people are more willing to approach me online, in real life I tend to intimidate people out of coming near me at all with the way I hold myself  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm much the same everywhere.
Blunt, word vomity, swinging between happily telling everyone everything and reclusing in a corner.
I used to think I was worse online, but it's more that other people are more willing to approach me online, in real life I tend to intimidate people out of coming near me at all with the way I hold myself "
So are you not intimidating when you approached online nicely?
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Dick in person dick on line. Only difference beung, I get a lot less bans in person....
Can confirm
Fluffy Cow thanks for the confirmation was looking for smoke to be blown up my arse, but hey ho
Moo
A chicken that moo's! Well I never, wonders never cease
MrsAbz
Thats the mysterious way of fab
Must be a fab chicken - says they only cluck but actually enjoys the odd moo too
MrsAbz
Have you ever seen a cow plop out a egg, or a chicken a calf..... "
Many a wondrous sight I have seen in my life but never such as a chicken birth a calf.
Clearly I have led but a quiet and sheltered existence
MrsAbz |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm much the same everywhere.
Blunt, word vomity, swinging between happily telling everyone everything and reclusing in a corner.
I used to think I was worse online, but it's more that other people are more willing to approach me online, in real life I tend to intimidate people out of coming near me at all with the way I hold myself
So are you not intimidating when you approached online nicely?
"
People can find me intimidating any time. How other people perceive me is down to them. Just people are a lot less likely to bother me in person |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Open 80%
Conscientious 55%
Extraversion 45%
Agreeableness 75%
Neuroticism 25%
That's my 'Big 5' Personality trait scores.
Conscientious is the bit I find hardest. ADHD doesn't help I don't think.
Bit sads if you don't like me. Can talk about if you want? No ok then.
280% of real man.
I understand. So you do your best, but won't lose sleep about it, if some people obviously blanking you or judging you."
Yeah that's me 280% Real man you know it sweetcheeks. See how agreeable I am? I reckon I could get it up 350% through Neuroticism alone, by worrying about what people on here think of me.
But then my openness would take one hell of a hit. Hey maybe I'd even start resenting people who are open and my agreeableness would suffer.
What a mindfuck that'd be. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm much the same everywhere.
Blunt, word vomity, swinging between happily telling everyone everything and reclusing in a corner.
I used to think I was worse online, but it's more that other people are more willing to approach me online, in real life I tend to intimidate people out of coming near me at all with the way I hold myself
So are you not intimidating when you approached online nicely?
People can find me intimidating any time. How other people perceive me is down to them. Just people are a lot less likely to bother me in person "
True, but I'm as an averageISH looking man couldn't get away with it.
I was labeled rude for so much less. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
" True, but I'm as an averageISH looking man couldn't get away with it.
I was labeled rude for so much less."
Looks have fuck all to do with it. I found something you said directly to me offensive, so removed the option to message me again. Though with the name change I only just clocked that's who you are.
No need to air dirty laundry on the forum |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Open 80%
Conscientious 55%
Extraversion 45%
Agreeableness 75%
Neuroticism 25%
That's my 'Big 5' Personality trait scores.
Conscientious is the bit I find hardest. ADHD doesn't help I don't think.
Bit sads if you don't like me. Can talk about if you want? No ok then.
280% of real man.
I understand. So you do your best, but won't lose sleep about it, if some people obviously blanking you or judging you.
Yeah that's me 280% Real man you know it sweetcheeks. See how agreeable I am? I reckon I could get it up 350% through Neuroticism alone, by worrying about what people on here think of me.
But then my openness would take one hell of a hit. Hey maybe I'd even start resenting people who are open and my agreeableness would suffer.
What a mindfuck that'd be. "
Obviously I was joking.
You are coming through friendly and approachable towards me and it doesn't happen often.
I guess I should do less boring crap threads.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ruceyyMan
over a year ago
London |
"I think I come across worse online tha I am in real life.
And I think people's personalities are bloody hard to gauge online. So much communication lost in the form of black and white text.
I think I'm quite easy going and soft and an open book. But that's not what forumites get.
You come across how you intend to I guess.
You are one of the popular kids after all.
FFS popular????
Define popular?
Let's see if your version of popular matches mine.
Oh now I'm in a shit mood.
I meant it as a compliment.
People like you.
Really? I always think the opposite to be honest.
But seriously I the being labelled as popular. I think it's bollocks."
I'd say I'm as popular as you PW.
How's that improved the mood? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Insofar as I’m constantly told I’m better (and sexier) in real life than I come across in my pics and messages, yes I’m misjudged.
My veris seem to reflect this too, but I’ve no idea how to readdress the balance. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Dick in person dick on line. Only difference beung, I get a lot less bans in person....
Can confirm
Fluffy Cow thanks for the confirmation was looking for smoke to be blown up my arse, but hey ho
Moo
A chicken that moo's! Well I never, wonders never cease
MrsAbz
Thats the mysterious way of fab
Must be a fab chicken - says they only cluck but actually enjoys the odd moo too
MrsAbz
Have you ever seen a cow plop out an egg, or a chicken a calf..... "
That’s made my eyes water |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
" True, but I'm as an averageISH looking man couldn't get away with it.
I was labeled rude for so much less.
Looks have fuck all to do with it. I found something you said directly to me offensive, so removed the option to message me again. Though with the name change I only just clocked that's who you are.
No need to air dirty laundry on the forum "
That wasn't on my mind.
Offensive is an exaggeration.
We had a disagreement about my openness and you bit my head off.
Removed the messaging option before you, but I undone it 10 minutes later.
I still can be interested in your opinions.
Especially in this thread.
Everyone is different.
People misunderstand things.
People taking things out of contest.
People not coming through the same in text as in a real conversation.
People can even disagree with each other without any drama.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
A few years back a group of us from a bike forum met up for a trip. We knew each other really well on there (we thought) but in real life we found it was extremely difficult to work out who was who. Some people were miles different to how I expected them to be, fortunately some others were easier to identify due to their nationality/accents.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"That wasn't on my mind.
Offensive is an exaggeration.
We had a disagreement about my openness and you bit my head off.
Removed the messaging option before you, but I undone it 10 minutes later.
I still can be interested in your opinions.
Especially in this thread.
Everyone is different.
People misunderstand things.
People taking things out of contest.
People not coming through the same in text as in a real conversation.
People can even disagree with each other without any drama.
"
If you say so. The looks comment seemed completely out of left field. So in looking for why I was drawn to that memory.
I found it offensive. Whether it was meant as such is irrelevant to how I interpreted it. I stand by my response
Text is always harder to interpret than with the body language to accompany it. I don't think anyone doubts that.
I thought the original question was more about do you feel like the honest you is put across here or a front that's easier to maintain online. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I'm dyslexic so can come across as rather starchy in type until I know someone. While in real life I can be a little ernest at times I find it easier for my humour and spontaneity to surface, it's down to having someone to spark with. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"That wasn't on my mind.
Offensive is an exaggeration.
We had a disagreement about my openness and you bit my head off.
Removed the messaging option before you, but I undone it 10 minutes later.
I still can be interested in your opinions.
Especially in this thread.
Everyone is different.
People misunderstand things.
People taking things out of contest.
People not coming through the same in text as in a real conversation.
People can even disagree with each other without any drama.
If you say so. The looks comment seemed completely out of left field. So in looking for why I was drawn to that memory.
I found it offensive. Whether it was meant as such is irrelevant to how I interpreted it. I stand by my response
Text is always harder to interpret than with the body language to accompany it. I don't think anyone doubts that.
I thought the original question was more about do you feel like the honest you is put across here or a front that's easier to maintain online."
I'll take it to the chin
I'm sorry, if I offended you.
Wasn't my intention.
Sorry and peace.
I hope we can move on without any bad blood on forums.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm dyslexic so can come across as rather starchy in type until I know someone. While in real life I can be a little ernest at times I find it easier for my humour and spontaneity to surface, it's down to having someone to spark with."
Humor can come through wrong definitely, if someone doesn't get your style. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
Obviously I was joking.
You are coming through friendly and approachable towards me and it doesn't happen often.
I guess I should do less boring crap threads.
"
You never know what threads will take off, some take on a mind of their own.
You seem sound to me too. Thanks. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I'm nice online, I'm nice in person.
I'm annoying online, I'm annoying in person.
I'm a bitch online, I'm a bitch in person.
I'm sweet online, I'm sweet in person.
I'm stressed online, I'm stressed in person.
Get the picture?
F |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm nice online, I'm nice in person.
I'm annoying online, I'm annoying in person.
I'm a bitch online, I'm a bitch in person.
I'm sweet online, I'm sweet in person.
I'm stressed online, I'm stressed in person.
Get the picture?
F"
Are you trying to say typical women like that or...?
Mood changes?
I wouldn't dare a statement like that, but you might get away with it. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I'm nice online, I'm nice in person.
I'm annoying online, I'm annoying in person.
I'm a bitch online, I'm a bitch in person.
I'm sweet online, I'm sweet in person.
I'm stressed online, I'm stressed in person.
Get the picture?
F
Are you trying to say typical women like that or...?
Mood changes?
I wouldn't dare a statement like that, but you might get away with it."
It meant that I come across online and in person the same. I wasn't characterising women
F |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
" True, but I'm as an averageISH looking man couldn't get away with it.
I was labeled rude for so much less.
Looks have fuck all to do with it. I found something you said directly to me offensive, so removed the option to message me again. Though with the name change I only just clocked that's who you are.
No need to air dirty laundry on the forum
That wasn't on my mind.
Offensive is an exaggeration.
We had a disagreement about my openness and you bit my head off.
Removed the messaging option before you, but I undone it 10 minutes later.
I still can be interested in your opinions.
Especially in this thread.
Everyone is different.
People misunderstand things.
People taking things out of contest.
People not coming through the same in text as in a real conversation.
People can even disagree with each other without any drama.
"
She's allowed her interpretation of what she finds offensive and to react accordingly. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
" True, but I'm as an averageISH looking man couldn't get away with it.
I was labeled rude for so much less.
Looks have fuck all to do with it. I found something you said directly to me offensive, so removed the option to message me again. Though with the name change I only just clocked that's who you are.
No need to air dirty laundry on the forum
That wasn't on my mind.
Offensive is an exaggeration.
We had a disagreement about my openness and you bit my head off.
Removed the messaging option before you, but I undone it 10 minutes later.
I still can be interested in your opinions.
Especially in this thread.
Everyone is different.
People misunderstand things.
People taking things out of contest.
People not coming through the same in text as in a real conversation.
People can even disagree with each other without any drama.
She's allowed her interpretation of what she finds offensive and to react accordingly."
I know and I apologized even though it felt the other way for me.
Anyway, I don't want to go there.
I want to be left alone, but not ignored, if you know what I mean. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Anywhere really, not just on Fab.
Dating profiles, public chats and forums...etc.
***
Introverts coming through worse than they are?
Extroverts coming through better than they are?
Psychopaths coming through as nice people?
Bullies coming through as popular ones?
Do you notice or care when you are being misjudged and ignored?
Are you being labeled as weird or geek when you try to get in the circle with the popular ones?
Is it possible you misjudged yourself and they are right?
No deep or personal meaning here, just interested about opinions and experiences.
No name calling or arguments please!
"
I don't think I'm coming across as different to those that know me really well.
To those who vaguely know me or have a passing acquaintance with me, I may seem a bit bolder online, more talkative or giving of my opinions. As in the company of a big groups I don't do so well, I am infinity more comfortable socialising 1:1, so yes I may seem different. But as everyone knows it's easier to be bolder behind a screen, that I can do and that is what people who know me and I feel comfortable with see. Someone who is more forthcoming with their opinions, conversation and ideas. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I'm nice online, I'm nice in person.
I'm annoying online, I'm annoying in person.
I'm a bitch online, I'm a bitch in person.
I'm sweet online, I'm sweet in person.
I'm stressed online, I'm stressed in person.
Get the picture?
F
Are you trying to say typical women like that or...?
Mood changes?
I wouldn't dare a statement like that, but you might get away with it.
It meant that I come across online and in person the same. I wasn't characterising women
F"
Good, because I wouldn't agree or confirm that. I don't think you come across like that anyway. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Anywhere really, not just on Fab.
Dating profiles, public chats and forums...etc.
***
Introverts coming through worse than they are?
Extroverts coming through better than they are?
Psychopaths coming through as nice people?
Bullies coming through as popular ones?
Do you notice or care when you are being misjudged and ignored?
Are you being labeled as weird or geek when you try to get in the circle with the popular ones?
Is it possible you misjudged yourself and they are right?
No deep or personal meaning here, just interested about opinions and experiences.
No name calling or arguments please!
I don't think I'm coming across as different to those that know me really well.
To those who vaguely know me or have a passing acquaintance with me, I may seem a bit bolder online, more talkative or giving of my opinions. As in the company of a big groups I don't do so well, I am infinity more comfortable socialising 1:1, so yes I may seem different. But as everyone knows it's easier to be bolder behind a screen, that I can do and that is what people who know me and I feel comfortable with see. Someone who is more forthcoming with their opinions, conversation and ideas. "
I am more comfortable with 1 on 1 conversations in person and online too.
I try to get rid of my introvert side, because literally I go to work than I'm home. Nothing between.
Right now I'm off work because of back injury. It means I'm more alone and probably more desperate to fit in.
That's why sometimes  making weird/controversial comments and threads.
I'm not writing this as an excuse or anyone to feel sorry.
Just saying it's a progress that I'm even on the forum. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
Obviously I was joking.
You are coming through friendly and approachable towards me and it doesn't happen often.
I guess I should do less boring crap threads.
You never know what threads will take off, some take on a mind of their own.
You seem sound to me too. Thanks. "
Thanks, you too.
Fist bump?
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
Obviously I was joking.
You are coming through friendly and approachable towards me and it doesn't happen often.
I guess I should do less boring crap threads.
You never know what threads will take off, some take on a mind of their own.
You seem sound to me too. Thanks.
Thanks, you too.
Fist bump?
"
 bromance on the cards! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
Obviously I was joking.
You are coming through friendly and approachable towards me and it doesn't happen often.
I guess I should do less boring crap threads.
You never know what threads will take off, some take on a mind of their own.
You seem sound to me too. Thanks.
Thanks, you too.
Fist bump?
bromance on the cards!"
Sure, I'm being really positive or naive suddenly.
Depends which way you look at it I guess. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
