FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you belong here?

Do you belong here?

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

After a late-night chat, today I've been musing on people versus their sexual needs.

Are they at war with each other?

Would you be here at all if it weren't for those pesky desires for threesomes or sharing your wife or to be tied up? Your insatiable need to show off your cock or your boobs? Are you in fact a conventional person in every other way?

I just wondered

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sexual needs is not what's keeping me here at the moment

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Sexual needs is not what's keeping me here at the moment "

But it's possibly why you joined?

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By *ewels74Woman over a year ago

Dundee/Angus/Blackpool

I joined because I wanted to learn more about myself and what I can try and experience. To me we are always learning in a daily basis. It's what my profile tells people,and the more I learn the more I want to try,hard and soft parts,

I've been here for 13 years and I feel more courageous with certain things,but shy at the same time and always talk myself out of doing something.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sexual needs is not what's keeping me here at the moment

But it's possibly why you joined? "

Wanted to explore sexual needs outside of the kink scene and try and understand my sexuality or discover what it is

Now it's more having people to talk to and not isolate myself even more

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By *riar BelisseWoman over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

My sexual needs enrich my life with pleasure, same as all my other hobbies do

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By *ohnboy64Man over a year ago

Blackpool

I'm here after being in two marriages that both ended up sexless after a couple of years. I have asked myself if it was down to me and in all honesty I don't think it was. I think I was just unlucky,,,, twice.

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

We probably look conventional.

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By *bi HaiveMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset

"After a late-night chat, today I've been musing on people versus their sexual needs.

Are they at war with each other?

I just wondered

I've never been conventional.

Came for the fun.

Stayed because I met a lot of awesome people.

The sex is just a bonus.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes I definitely do. I love the swinging lifestyle, plus the friendships I've made, they're great as well as all the sexual experiences.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I joined because I wanted to learn more about myself and what I can try and experience. To me we are always learning in a daily basis. It's what my profile tells people,and the more I learn the more I want to try,hard and soft parts,

I've been here for 13 years and I feel more courageous with certain things,but shy at the same time and always talk myself out of doing something."

That's fascinating to read. Do you mean you don't take up offers or back out of "meets"? Because of shyness?

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By *ensuallover1000Man over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

I don’t belong here but do nonetheless enjoy the forum

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"We probably look conventional. "

Oh there is a lot unsaid in that comment

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"We probably look conventional.

Oh there is a lot unsaid in that comment

Quite!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Sexual needs is not what's keeping me here at the moment

But it's possibly why you joined?

Wanted to explore sexual needs outside of the kink scene and try and understand my sexuality or discover what it is

Now it's more having people to talk to and not isolate myself even more "

I can relate to that - I think having people to talk to who also "get" sex and kink is - it's a place where you can lower your guard a little?

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By *ewels74Woman over a year ago

Dundee/Angus/Blackpool

I've been here for 13 years and I feel more courageous with certain things,but shy at the same time and always talk myself out of doing something.

That's fascinating to read. Do you mean you don't take up offers or back out of "meets"? Because of shyness?"

I Don't back out of meets,cause I would meet and I've met wonderful people in my time here,but yes I'm seriously shy and literally have to kick myself to go out cause I end up overthinking so much about things and I worry lol

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By *ohntall123Man over a year ago

Biggleswade

"After a late-night chat, today I've been musing on people versus their sexual needs.

Are they at war with each other?

I just wondered

I guess I like being around like minded people , it’s not for everyone I know

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"After a late-night chat, today I've been musing on people versus their sexual needs.

Are they at war with each other?

I just wondered

My body is at war with my mind. My body is not cooperating with my want of some sex. My mind is not cooperating with my body in that I do want to show my boobs with a person but get too shy.

Because of this, I'm just here for the forums and working on myself

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"My sexual needs enrich my life with pleasure, same as all my other hobbies do

That sounds a very harmonious way to live

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I definitely belong here, it’s a cheaper and less frustrating hobby than golf.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I don’t belong here but do nonetheless enjoy the forum

Now why do you say you don't belong?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sexual needs is not what's keeping me here at the moment

But it's possibly why you joined?

Wanted to explore sexual needs outside of the kink scene and try and understand my sexuality or discover what it is

Now it's more having people to talk to and not isolate myself even more

I can relate to that - I think having people to talk to who also "get" sex and kink is - it's a place where you can lower your guard a little?"

Yes and if you can be open with people about kink or sex, there is little else you can't be open about.

Not just from this site but I would not be alive if it was not for kink friends

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But I’m a creep, I’m a weirdo.

What the hell am I doing here?

I don’t belong here.…

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

No I don't

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'm here after being in two marriages that both ended up sexless after a couple of years. I have asked myself if it was down to me and in all honesty I don't think it was. I think I was just unlucky,,,, twice."

Then it sounds as though you belong?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I've been here for 13 years and I feel more courageous with certain things,but shy at the same time and always talk myself out of doing something.

That's fascinating to read. Do you mean you don't take up offers or back out of "meets"? Because of shyness?

That must make it quite tough at times. It does seem a place designed for extraverts.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I feel like people on here are constantly trying to get others to leave.

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By *ealitybitesMan over a year ago

Belfast

I joined to explore what I had never explored before which was virtually everything.

It has never been about needs because I have never needed sex.

Circumstances have halted that exploration so I'm only using the forums and not meeting.

Maybe I don't belong but I've always enjoyed being where I don't belong.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"After a late-night chat, today I've been musing on people versus their sexual needs.

Are they at war with each other?

I just wondered

I've never been conventional.

Came for the fun.

Stayed because I met a lot of awesome people.

The sex is just a bonus. "

I see quite a few people who've been here a while say this - the community draws you in perhaps? I think the socials must help hugely there.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Belong to myself not fab or any other petson or entity.

Here like everyone else

Meet lovely people

Discover my fantasies

My kinks...

A sexual pleasure meeting with my future kinky person who ever that might be

or persons

To read forums and engage

Yes, boring I know

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By *hagTonightMan over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

[Removed by poster at 14/09/23 21:30:58]

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By *hagTonightMan over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

I joined for the sex, but staying because of the forum, it is comedy gold

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I joined for the sex, but staying because of the forum, it is comedy gold

Have you tried watching Tony Hancock?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"My sexual needs enrich my life with pleasure, same as all my other hobbies do

Love this! I once saw a couple heading out on a long bike ride - as I was heading out to meet my ex for a a swing date. I thought both couples put an equal amount of effort into planning the outing, and it’s something we enjoy together. So yes, a hobby like many other that brings pleasure!

I joined to explore my bi side and ended up staying - made some really nice friends and enjoy being able to chat to people who don’t see sex as something bad

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Yes I definitely do. I love the swinging lifestyle, plus the friendships I've made, they're great as well as all the sexual experiences."

Wonderful! A perfect fit

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By *os19Man over a year ago

Edmonton

In the beginning I feel we all belong here otherwise we wouldn’t have joined up.When we have been here a while and we get older and we find we are out of a lot of people’s age range we may start to question ourselves why are we still here. I am not sure how long I will be here now but I’m here on my terms doing things my way and for me that’s all that counts

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have currently/last few years found myself in a state of limbo...I have the desire but no apparent skill.

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan over a year ago

A den in the Glen

Probably not but where else is there to wait?

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By *bi HaiveMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset

"After a late-night chat, today I've been musing on people versus their sexual needs.

Are they at war with each other?

I just wondered

I've never been conventional.

Came for the fun.

Stayed because I met a lot of awesome people.

The sex is just a bonus.

I see quite a few people who've been here a while say this - the community draws you in perhaps? I think the socials must help hugely there. "

Yep.

I enjoy the social side as much as the sex. I've made great friends over the years, found a wife, gone back to being single and found new friends. I could never be here solely just for pirely casual encounters. I need more substance than that.

And when you manage to find that extra it's great.

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By *ohnboy64Man over a year ago

Blackpool

Then it sounds as though you belong?"

Yep, and happy to be here.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"After a late-night chat, today I've been musing on people versus their sexual needs.

Are they at war with each other?

I just wondered

I guess I like being around like minded people , it’s not for everyone I know "

It's a relief when you don't have to watch yourself...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Probably not but where else is there to wait?"

Ok. I will take the bait. Wait for what?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"No I don't "

When did you change your name back?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"After a late-night chat, today I've been musing on people versus their sexual needs.

Are they at war with each other?

I just wondered

My body is at war with my mind. My body is not cooperating with my want of some sex. My mind is not cooperating with my body in that I do want to show my boobs with a person but get too shy.

Because of this, I'm just here for the forums and working on myself

I'm not shy, but I totally get that there's a part of you holding back from what you want. Warring factions really. I hope you find some peace.

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By *unchalMan over a year ago

Dartford

"After a late-night chat, today I've been musing on people versus their sexual needs.

Are they at war with each other?

I just wondered

Yes. Sex. Please. I have no fancy notions. I just sex. Thanks.

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By *eyond PurityCouple over a year ago

Lincolnshire

FAB has changed our sex life completely - we’d never had threesomes before FAB, sent naked pics, posed for pics, gone to clubs - it’s given us the confidence to explore our fantasies and realise them instead of wondering about them.

The only bad thing is that it’s making us more depraved

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I definitely belong here, it’s a cheaper and less frustrating hobby than golf.

Less frustrating?!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I feel like people on here are constantly trying to get others to leave. "

Well, there are times I'd agree with you!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I definitely belong here, it’s a cheaper and less frustrating hobby than golf.

Less frustrating?! "

Absolutely.

The efforts to get my wang wet, are far less frustrating than chasing a dozen golf balls that I’m losing around the course.

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By *olly_chromaticTV/TS over a year ago

Stockport

Do I belong here? Probably not, but I seem to be allowed through the door. It's a bit like when I went to parties in my youth - I'd sit in a corner reading a paperback, wondering how one did the talking to girls thing, generally not even sure why I was there. Forty years later nothing much has changed except for my dress style. I'm a bit better at the talking with girls thing, but here I am still in a corner with my paperback...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It’s nice to have an escape from playing the charade that is ‘me’ to the rest of the world for a while

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Belong to myself not fab or any other petson or entity.

Here like everyone else

Meet lovely people

Discover my fantasies

My kinks...

A sexual pleasure meeting with my future kinky person who ever that might be

or persons

To read forums and engage

Yes, boring I know

Nah, not boring!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"But I’m a creep, I’m a weirdo.

What the hell am I doing here?

I don’t belong here.…"

Your serious answer is later, yeah?

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By *immy200TV/TS over a year ago

chester

I don't think you can separate the 2 easily. Our sexual desires and needs are the reason we exist as a species. No desire for sex, no reproduction. 1000s of years of technological advancement has given us the ooportunity and more importantly time to explore and think about our sexuality more than animals. We can also share ideas which gives us more things to want to try. But a short answer to the question is I am incredibly conventional in my everyday life and I think I am definitely here to explore sexual desires and fantasies.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I joined to explore what I had never explored before which was virtually everything.

It has never been about needs because I have never needed sex.

Circumstances have halted that exploration so I'm only using the forums and not meeting.

Maybe I don't belong but I've always enjoyed being where I don't belong. "

Why? I was just thinking tonight I hate being somewhere I don't belong. And this place feels like that often.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"No I don't

When did you change your name back?

Does it matter?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"In the beginning I feel we all belong here otherwise we wouldn’t have joined up.When we have been here a while and we get older and we find we are out of a lot of people’s age range we may start to question ourselves why are we still here. I am not sure how long I will be here now but I’m here on my terms doing things my way and for me that’s all that counts "

I think lots of older people do fine but it all depends what you're after and your circumstances. Actually I think it's what you're after that determines whether you feel you belong.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"No I don't

When did you change your name back?

Does it matter? "

I was just getting used to the other one

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan over a year ago

A den in the Glen

"Probably not but where else is there to wait?

Ok. I will take the bait. Wait for what?

Lol no bait...and waiting for nothing in particular. Not exactly sure why I am here.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I feel like people on here are constantly trying to get others to leave.

Well, there are times I'd agree with you! "

It’s usually said if you’re fed up of it or criticising Fab - “why don’t you leave?” - like you have to be happy and jolly all the time

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By *ilsaGeorgeCouple over a year ago

kent

This is an intriguing question. I’m not sure if we do belong here. We love the connection and intimacy and sex we can have with others, but Fab is just a tiny part of our very busy lives, and mostly we just don’t have the time to forge connections with new people. The few meets we have are always with old friends, not new ones. That isn’t to say we don’t want to meet new people, we just find it hard to build those connections now. Also, for a long time, we didn’t feel welcome here. That feeling is beginning to fade, but it’s taken a long time.

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By *oecutterMan over a year ago

Clonakilty

"After a late-night chat, today I've been musing on people versus their sexual needs.

Are they at war with each other?

I just wondered

I’m here mostly to find a FWB.

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By *ersiantugMan over a year ago

Cardiff

"After a late-night chat, today I've been musing on people versus their sexual needs.

Are they at war with each other?

I just wondered

No one I know or work with would have a clue who I am (or what I get up to) via Fab and a couple of other places.

I kind of need it that way, but something inside me does push the line a little (ie in terms of being totally hidden lol).

What can you do?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I have currently/last few years found myself in a state of limbo...I have the desire but no apparent skill."

Skill with what?

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan over a year ago

A den in the Glen

"I have currently/last few years found myself in a state of limbo...I have the desire but no apparent skill.

Skill with what?"

I think I know. To flip, I probably have the skill but not the desire!

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By *eroLondonMan over a year ago

Mayfair

I'm here for my reasons. It's a conduit for sex. Sex is my aspiration. The fora and the friendships are a bonus.

But I'm here for the sex.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

That's a good honest question. I'm here because I have a really high sex drive, single now after a long realationship. So I want to have new experiences

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I joined for the sex, but staying because of the forum, it is comedy gold

Have you tried watching Tony Hancock? "

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"After a late-night chat, today I've been musing on people versus their sexual needs.

Are they at war with each other?

I just wondered

I've never been conventional.

Came for the fun.

Stayed because I met a lot of awesome people.

The sex is just a bonus.

I see quite a few people who've been here a while say this - the community draws you in perhaps? I think the socials must help hugely there.

Yep.

And when you manage to find that extra it's great. "

I've found not wanting purely casual encounters is what makes me feel I don't belong at times. I remember being told quite firmly that it isn't mumsnet.

Takes time to see there are others who feel the same.

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By *hagTonightMan over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

"I joined for the sex, but staying because of the forum, it is comedy gold

Have you tried watching Tony Hancock? "
No. I havent, have you?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I joined for the sex, but staying because of the forum, it is comedy gold

Have you tried watching Tony Hancock? No. I havent, have you?"

Yes thanks

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By *hagTonightMan over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

"I joined for the sex, but staying because of the forum, it is comedy gold

Have you tried watching Tony Hancock? No. I havent, have you?

Yes thanks "
That is good

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"After a late-night chat, today I've been musing on people versus their sexual needs.

Are they at war with each other?

I just wondered

Yes. Sex. Please. I have no fancy notions. I just sex. Thanks. "

Enjoy the sex

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'm here for my reasons. It's a conduit for sex. Sex is my aspiration. The fora and the friendships are a bonus.

But I'm here for the sex."

I thought it was for the Afternoon Teas. Now I realise they're just a funnel! (sob)

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By *mf123Man over a year ago

with one foot out the door

Im here for all the wrong reasons but im here cos i said id be there and its my only avenue to put that sentiment into practice

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By *t0600Man over a year ago

elvedon

Sometimes question whether I should be on here or not at times as it can be really hard work but when it’s good it’s great . Hence why I often have breaks

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By *onathan14Man over a year ago

Liverpool

I think there's a need fora chatspace like Fabs. It's a place to arrange adult fun of course but its a place openinded people can interact with each other. I think talking about swinging and acting on it are very different.

This is like a dirty book of the past.

Being on here is just a bit of fun if you're polite and not really meeting.

I come here for a read and to perv.

I'm happy with that.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I probably don't belong here in the eyes of many. I'm OK with that.

I'm just doing my own thing

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By *abtastic Mr FoxMan over a year ago

A den in the Glen

"I probably don't belong here in the eyes of many. I'm OK with that.

I'm just doing my own thing "

Fcuk the eyes of many. Do your own thing. There should be no tier system in the forums. Mmm there's an interesting thread.

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By *ermite12ukMan over a year ago

Solihull and Brentwood

Nope.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I dont think being on here make me particularly unconventional tbh. I've seen fab discussed openly and joked about on fb.

It's not like its underground or even very daring now.

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By *nightsoftheCoffeeTableCouple over a year ago

Leeds

I'd have never signed up if we wasn't looking for sexual meets, however I stay for the socials & forums we don't look to meet from fab anymore.

Mrs

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By *ealMissShadyWoman over a year ago

St Albans/ Welsh Borders

I love the swinging lifestyle and the communities, it's like a whole world away from my 'normal' life where I can explore. If it were not for Fab and swinging I would not have met some of the amazing people I have done.

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By *rHotNottsMan over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

I don’t think I’m conventional at all and most women I meet off here aren’t either, quite the opposite. I think it adds to us , you can get all those things off of fab as well, but this is a really good place for it.

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By *actilenorfolkgentMan over a year ago

Norwich

Yes I joined to still enjoy sexual experiences with like minded people, ideally with matures like myself, it's not easy though

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By *2000ManMan over a year ago

Worthing

I enjoy the social interaction. So many good subjects to discuss apart from the obvious.

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By *ilverfox for youMan over a year ago

Hull

Whatever anyone says it’s all about the sex on this site !just be honest

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Whatever anyone says it’s all about the sex on this site !just be honest "

Don't call people liars, if you please

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By *eroLondonMan over a year ago

Mayfair

"I'm here for my reasons. It's a conduit for sex. Sex is my aspiration. The fora and the friendships are a bonus.

But I'm here for the sex.

I thought it was for the Afternoon Teas. Now I realise they're just a funnel! (sob)"

•

The Afternoon Teas are just a ruse for me to recruit new paramours.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I dont think being on here make me particularly unconventional tbh. I've seen fab discussed openly and joked about on fb.

It's not like its underground or even very daring now."

In my real life world, it would be pretty unconventional and shocking to most. Even being non-monogamous is still well outside the mainstream.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'm here for my reasons. It's a conduit for sex. Sex is my aspiration. The fora and the friendships are a bonus.

But I'm here for the sex.

I thought it was for the Afternoon Teas. Now I realise they're just a funnel! (sob)

•

The Afternoon Teas are just a ruse for me to recruit new paramours.

I KNEW it!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I think most people have focussed on the swinging but my question was also addressing kink. If anyone had any thoughts?

I've found talking to a lot of guys over the years that many of them feel very ashamed and unable to accept some of their kink when they're very conventional men in other ways.

Some found it difficult at times to balance what we find sexually arousing with what society often deems abuse.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I dont think being on here make me particularly unconventional tbh. I've seen fab discussed openly and joked about on fb.

It's not like its underground or even very daring now.

In my real life world, it would be pretty unconventional and shocking to most. Even being non-monogamous is still well outside the mainstream. "

I'm not convinced. People pretend a lot. I just dont think this site is particularly daring in the whole scheme of things.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Such a shame that people can't work through that

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman over a year ago

Wherever

Good question OP. The longer I’m here the more I’m convinced I don’t belong yet can’t live.

I like the community feel, the forum and socials but other than that, I feel like I need to work on myself more and only then maybe one day I will feel like I belong.

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By *eeliciouschaosWoman over a year ago

Wherever

*leave not live

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By *acDreamyMan over a year ago

Wirral

I think about sex 24/7 but I don't think this is the right place for me.

I come back from habit mostly.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I dont think being on here make me particularly unconventional tbh. I've seen fab discussed openly and joked about on fb.

It's not like its underground or even very daring now.

In my real life world, it would be pretty unconventional and shocking to most. Even being non-monogamous is still well outside the mainstream.

I'm not convinced. People pretend a lot. I just dont think this site is particularly daring in the whole scheme of things.

It's not just my world, it's the conversations I've had with others online that guide my perspective. And that's all it is, my perspective based on my experience.

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By *ansoffateMan over a year ago

Sagittarius A

If the belief that nobody needs to be conventional is a convention then I am conventional.

Did I clear that up?

I think what I am here for varies to some extent. Right now there's some interesting conversation going on.

That can be a conduit to forming a connection with people sometimes.

I guess that's part of the appeal of the forum rather than the swipe left/right sites.

Maybe I am just whittling some time away waiting for the worms to come.

Belong? Of course I do Fab is inclusive.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"That's a good honest question. I'm here because I have a really high sex drive, single now after a long realationship. So I want to have new experiences "

This seems the place for that, for sure!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I have currently/last few years found myself in a state of limbo...I have the desire but no apparent skill.

Skill with what?

I think I know. To flip, I probably have the skill but not the desire!"

Still bemused...

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By *eliWoman over a year ago

I think I can appear quite conventional because I am to a certain extent, on paper at least.

When it comes to my romantic and sexual life I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm not conventional but equally... I don't think I'm the norm.

I'm not too sure I do fit in here. I like connections with people and don't feel a sexual desire without a level of friendship.

I'm poly but actively avoiding relationships for the time being. And yet I do care for those I'm currently "seeing".

I have no interest in meeting lots of different people because I don't have the headspace for it. I'm happy to go on dates (really enjoying those at the moment truth be told) but not date date.

I adore sex, truly relish it but I'm more than happy to have a date just involving lots of kissing and dry humping. Actually they're incredibly hot and a bit of a thing for me. It's not about keeping people interested, people come back even after sex. It's more being comfortable with what I want.

I'm not going to discuss my kinky side because it's a public fora and I don't want nonsense.

Sometimes I think I perhaps don't belong here but the majority of the time I'm now saying fuck it and just doing things the way I want to. It's not stopping me from meeting some fantastic people.

And the friends I've made here? They make me feel like I belong. So perhaps I do.

I'm too prone to waffling to really fit in though.

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By *uke_silverMan over a year ago

London

I do not (yet), there's an "it" factor that you need to be up to fab standard and it's hard work achieving that when you're a shy introvert!

I'll keep working on myself and try to be better.

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By *ansoffateMan over a year ago

Sagittarius A

"I think I can appear quite conventional because I am to a certain extent, on paper at least.

When it comes to my romantic and sexual life I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm not conventional but equally... I don't think I'm the norm.

I'm not too sure I do fit in here. I like connections with people and don't feel a sexual desire without a level of friendship.

I'm poly but actively avoiding relationships for the time being. And yet I do care for those I'm currently "seeing".

I have no interest in meeting lots of different people because I don't have the headspace for it. I'm happy to go on dates (really enjoying those at the moment truth be told) but not date date.

I'm not going to discuss my kinky side because it's a public fora and I don't want nonsense.

Sometimes I think I perhaps don't belong here but the majority of the time I'm now saying fuck it and just doing things the way I want to. It's not stopping me from meeting some fantastic people.

And the friends I've made here? They make me feel like I belong. So perhaps I do.

I'm too prone to waffling to really fit in though.

I like your waffle, it has bacon and maple syrup.

What is the norm now sexually? Is anyone really 'vanilla'

I was chatting to a friend who claims to be monogamous and vanilla. Within 30 mins the desires she was expressing and stories she told me had me