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Competition...
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
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It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Absolutely not  |
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If your seeing it as a competition, maybe it's time to have a break.... |
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This is disappointing. I saw the title and thought I could maybe win something 
Seriously, though - no. Making this into a competition if you're not a textbook hot girl or chap would be a short experiment in disappointment. |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
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"Absolutely not "
Ha! I really don't want to influence how the thread goes so I'm deliberately not posting how I feel about "competition".  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?"
Morning, I can’t help feel FAB itself is very competitive simply due to the percentage of men to women ratio however this doesn’t stop me approaching the profiles I read and like I understand the ruling of no response and deleted messages also  .
However I don’t feel the forums are competitive at all, they’re quite funny in most occasions  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?"
I don't have the energy to compete.
I never have and I never will fight for someone's attention. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It’s not a competition for me.I do a lot of lurking and watching of the forums and It is definitely a competition for some. |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Travelling |
Is it? Yes of course it is. As a single man it's competition based, like it or not. Simple based around the whole "stand out" comments.
Do I or some others play in to that competition? No, can't be arsed with all that. I don't have the interest, energy, or effort to compete for somebody's attention, on here or out in the world anymore. If I'm not noticed or have nobody showing interest I'm not going to go out of my way to try. |
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We are far too relaxed to be competitive about anything....except Monopoly as that's serious. |
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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago
Stirling |
God no - I almost see competitiveness in terms of attention desperate if someone wants to get to know me they will and vice versa. I’m not about to go pipping myself against the woman of fab or comparing myself to them (this makes me cringe) I know my own worth and it certainly doesn’t come from a fab on a picture or a ‘can I smash your back doors in’ message |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
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"This is disappointing. I saw the title and thought I could maybe win something
Seriously, though - no. Making this into a competition if you're not a textbook hot girl or chap would be a short experiment in disappointment. "
I'm sorry, I'm such a word tease. You don't have to be a textbook hot girl or chap to get attention/not be disappointed by your time on Fab. |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?
Morning, I can’t help feel FAB itself is very competitive simply due to the percentage of men to women ratio however this doesn’t stop me approaching the profiles I read and like I understand the ruling of no response and deleted messages also .
However I don’t feel the forums are competitive at all, they’re quite funny in most occasions "
Ah this kind of makes sense, I hadn't thought about the ratios being viewed as competition. Clearly I need coffee.
I don't know, part of me thinks that once you remove the fake profiles, the ones who you're not compatible with for a myriad of reasons, the ones who are here to wank and not meet, the number of men vs women does shrink a little bit. I'm not sure how true that is though!
Yes, the forums are amusing. It's good to take a step back and just appreciate them for what they are. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?
Morning, I can’t help feel FAB itself is very competitive simply due to the percentage of men to women ratio however this doesn’t stop me approaching the profiles I read and like I understand the ruling of no response and deleted messages also .
However I don’t feel the forums are competitive at all, they’re quite funny in most occasions
Ah this kind of makes sense, I hadn't thought about the ratios being viewed as competition. Clearly I need coffee.
I don't know, part of me thinks that once you remove the fake profiles, the ones who you're not compatible with for a myriad of reasons, the ones who are here to wank and not meet, the number of men vs women does shrink a little bit. I'm not sure how true that is though!
Yes, the forums are amusing. It's good to take a step back and just appreciate them for what they are."
I can’t really spit fakes tbf but I genuinely only DM profiles I read and think “that’s me they’re seeking” but sad to say to little or no avail
But yeah you have to be a very non sensitive soul to deal with the forums |
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Yes I see it daily on here, the lamp post pissing and chasing of the same people is amusing
I rarely hunt men off the forums, so I wouldn't be in any competition on here, with the men who have benched me, for someone else, I walk away |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
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"I don't have the energy to compete.
I never have and I never will fight for someone's attention. "
Yes, if you're having to fight for it... well they don't really want to give you that attention. Or expect you to perform and give them enough adulation before they deign to give you energy. Neither scenario is great. |
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[Removed by poster at 08/08/23 08:27:56] |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I ever started to feel like I had to compete for someone’s attention I’d walk away. |
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?"
Forums - not at all, I'm not as active and I don't stand a chance against the seasoned veterans on here anyway!
Attention of the person you find attractive - depends. Is it still a competition if you're the only competitor (but there are environmental challenges). The best analogy I can think of - it's a race with 2 people on opposite ends of the track. It's not a simple track though - there are hurdles you need to bypass and meandering paths you need to avoid. Oh, and both participants can run towards each other - it's not one way traffic! This is something I only thought of after seeing this post, so not everything may make sense, but I think it is understandable? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I will never compete or see myself as a competitor in here
If you don’t like me for me then it’s a big no
The amount of people who praise people or try and win favour with others, for me is both painful but also widely amusing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It’s not a competition for me.I do a lot of lurking and watching of the forums and It is definitely a competition for some. "
and amusing to observe though I’ll sometimes throw a ‘sparkler’ not so much a grenade in, to jazz things up a bit  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always come first, OP. |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Travelling |
"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?
Forums - not at all, I'm not as active and I don't stand a chance against the seasoned veterans on here anyway!
Attention of the person you find attractive - depends. Is it still a competition if you're the only competitor (but there are environmental challenges). The best analogy I can think of - it's a race with 2 people on opposite ends of the track. It's not a simple track though - there are hurdles you need to bypass and meandering paths you need to avoid. Oh, and both participants can run towards each other - it's not one way traffic! This is something I only thought of after seeing this post, so not everything may make sense, but I think it is understandable?"
So very true |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?
Forums - not at all, I'm not as active and I don't stand a chance against the seasoned veterans on here anyway!
Attention of the person you find attractive - depends. Is it still a competition if you're the only competitor (but there are environmental challenges). The best analogy I can think of - it's a race with 2 people on opposite ends of the track. It's not a simple track though - there are hurdles you need to bypass and meandering paths you need to avoid. Oh, and both participants can run towards each other - it's not one way traffic! This is something I only thought of after seeing this post, so not everything may make sense, but I think it is understandable?"
I have to run? Out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?"
Personally not, but for some it clearly is, saw a person that shall not be named here who we both thought was quite sexy post up if she didn’t get x amount of fabs on pics would cry
As it’s a form of social media the sad elements and narcissistic traits will inevitably follow !
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No if I did I probably wouldn't be here. I'm not competitive at all. |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
I'm not competitive unless there's money involved and it's a 5p prize for a handwriting competition. |
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[Removed by poster at 08/08/23 08:39:33] |
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Nah .. I'm just me , not in competition with anyone else ..
Some like me and some don't and that's cool with me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"[Removed by poster at 08/08/23 08:39:33]"
I hadn't finished reading that!!! |
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I think to some it is but I guess so is life in general. On here there are numerous posts on how some get so many fabs on their posts, how nobody responds to them to the posts of how only the clique exists. But I guess we all to a point want to be popular and attractive.
I'll admit there are days where I think why do I bother? There is always someone who is more popular, attractive and just comes across better than I do. And Fab really does highlight these things to me at least. But that's when I know it's time to spend less time on here. So yeah I guess there are times my own insecurities make me feel it is a bit competitive on here. |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Travelling |
"[Removed by poster at 08/08/23 08:39:33]
I hadn't finished reading that!!!"
I did. It was a good one. |
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The “Fab my pic if….” Crew definitely view it as a competition even if it is to get to the top of the hot pics.
Me? I’ve no fucks to give |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
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"We are far too relaxed to be competitive about anything....except Monopoly as that's serious."
Monopoly is a very serious game. I wouldn't even call it a game come to think of it, it's that serious. |
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Life is a competition, if only against yourself. |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
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"God no - I almost see competitiveness in terms of attention desperate if someone wants to get to know me they will and vice versa. I’m not about to go pipping myself against the woman of fab or comparing myself to them (this makes me cringe) I know my own worth and it certainly doesn’t come from a fab on a picture or a ‘can I smash your back doors in’ message "
Ha, yes. I enjoy your rational posts Dancer, good to read you again.
I think you and I are quite aligned in how we view it - there's a brilliant quote by Maya Angelou on women and competition and it's so true.
Everyone is so different and brings their uniqueness to the table. Plus, people can and do find more than one person attractive. Even more so on a site like this. |
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So I came to fab for one primary purpose, that being the search for sex. Then I found out I was awash in a sea of cock, so of course that brings an element of competition with it.
The forums not so much, I come do my own thing, if that achieves the primary purpose is a different matter entirely. But outside the forums, again is totally different. |
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"So I came to fab for one primary purpose, that being the search for sex. Then I found out I was awash in a sea of cock, so of course that brings an element of competition with it.
The forums not so much, I come do my own thing, if that achieves the primary purpose is a different matter entirely. But outside the forums, again is totally different."
I do not delude or kid myself, that there is a competive side to fab, cuz there is. If I'm saying there's no competition attached to it, I'm either trying to kud myself or trying to kid others...peace out |
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This place has never been about sex for me, it's been about being part of a kind of community.
Kinda like a book club, but with dong.
I wouldn't try to read the most books in a book club and be all like "look how good I am at all the books", because nobody likes that prick.
Same reasoning here.
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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago
Stirling |
"God no - I almost see competitiveness in terms of attention desperate if someone wants to get to know me they will and vice versa. I’m not about to go pipping myself against the woman of fab or comparing myself to them (this makes me cringe) I know my own worth and it certainly doesn’t come from a fab on a picture or a ‘can I smash your back doors in’ message
Ha, yes. I enjoy your rational posts Dancer, good to read you again.
I think you and I are quite aligned in how we view it - there's a brilliant quote by Maya Angelou on women and competition and it's so true.
Everyone is so different and brings their uniqueness to the table. Plus, people can and do find more than one person attractive. Even more so on a site like this."
Love this Meli! |
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By *ack688Man
over a year ago
abruzzo Italy (and UK) |
Not a competition as such but with such a high ratio of men to women you can be sure that as a man, anyone you message is going to get dozens, if not hundreds of other messages so it’s easy to be overlooked. I know I get put off messaging anyone who gets their pics in the top pages of hot pics as they really will be inundated with messages, and someone I was looking at yesterday had a pic that had been fabbed over 27,000 times so I just gave up at that point |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not at all there is no room in this world for comptison or anything like that |
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I’m definitely not competing against anyone.
For one thing we’re all after different prizes.
I refuse to pip myself against other women in some one upmanship thing.
And also - from my personal perspective - it’s all about sharing anyway |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
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"Yes I see it daily on here, the lamp post pissing and chasing of the same people is amusing
I rarely hunt men off the forums, so I wouldn't be in any competition on here, with the men who have benched me, for someone else, I walk away "
Ah it gives people something to talk about. I'm also increasingly aware of lpp not always being that - sometimes it's just a couple of friends having fun. Meh, fuck it.
Ah, the "hunt"! Yes. A friend who was on here would describe it as hunting. Stables. Etc etc. |
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We don’t see others as competitors as if people are compatible then we only want to share some time with people, not take them away from anyone.
I guess some profiles/messages see themselves as competing when they say they aren’t like the others and I guess we are competing in a sense by trying to make our profiles stand out.
K |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
I don’t, but you can sometimes see it in others on the forum.
This is why I prefer to meet men who don’t have a plethora of women on rotation- it’s far less drama.
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By *mf123Man
over a year ago
with one foot out the door |
I used to compete at everything until i lost it was all about being the best in the universe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? …."
Hell no! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? ….
Hell no! "
And I’d suggest if anyone does, they re-evaluate their life and find something more important to enjoy.  |
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I’ve just had to delete my first answer to this because I was going to say I don’t compete on here, but that may not be correct.
I don’t compete in that I am only myself on here, what you see from me is what you get and I wouldn’t alter that to attract anyone or make myself look better than anybody else.
However
There's always a however, I do think that I do compete for attention, that’s not a fab thing, it’s a long standing flaw in my character.
That’s why when this post goes largely ignored it will feel like a rapier through my heart.  |
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I only compete with myself. Seriously I am forever trying to be a better person than I was yesterday. It's a battle that's exhausting and leaves very little energy. It is however the only competition I'm interested in. |
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"I only compete with myself. Seriously I am forever trying to be a better person than I was yesterday. It's a battle that's exhausting and leaves very little energy. It is however the only competition I'm interested in. "
Jo.Xx |
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I'm too lazy to be competitive at anything.
I do see subtle and not so subtle competition on fab. |
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I've never seen it as a competition.
Who would I be competing against if I did?
Every other man on here or just the ones of a similar age?
There are lots of younger, fitter, more social men than me so I've never been one for one-upmanship.
I prefer to just be me and let others come to me rather than compete for attention. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's not but in someways I do feel like I'm competing against my will at times. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Their is alot of 'clicks' on the (forums).
And especially in the 'chat rooms' aswell.  |
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Yes indeed; I hereby challenge any dude on here to a, ‘Who can piss the furthest up the wall’ competition.
It will be a battle of such might that proud songs shall be sung of our resulting, Herculean struggle in hundreds of years time. |
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No, haven't got the energy to compete. They either want me or they don't. I will actually walk away from a situation if there's any kind of competitiveness. |
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Oh, OP. How can fab fail to be competitive? We are all here looking for something, whether or not we admit it to ourselves or others. Some people embrace that aspect and others shy away from it. Some people like to share, and others don't. The human ego can be fragile.
Mrs TMN x |
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? (Very much so for others but not for me ) Whether it's vying for attention on the fora.( I don't ) Getting the attention of the person you find attractive.(I don't. If I did I'd just go directly to them via DM ) Do you see fab as being competitive?(Highly for some people you can witness it on the forums. Not so much to do with sex but to do with personality types and their personal discomfort with themselves ) Are you competing for anything on here?( No. Nada. Niet. Nothing. Nein - If that changes,i'll let you know ) "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No. And I'm not interested in competing.
"If I ever started to feel like I had to compete for someone’s attention I’d walk away. "
This 100%, both here and the in real life.
I am single though, so maybe I'm doing it wrong. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
I am single though, so maybe I'm doing it wrong."
Made me smile |
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No, I'm not sure what you'd be competing for to be honest, unless there's some prize somewhere I'm not aware of?
Mrs |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?
Forums - not at all, I'm not as active and I don't stand a chance against the seasoned veterans on here anyway!
Attention of the person you find attractive - depends. Is it still a competition if you're the only competitor (but there are environmental challenges). The best analogy I can think of - it's a race with 2 people on opposite ends of the track. It's not a simple track though - there are hurdles you need to bypass and meandering paths you need to avoid. Oh, and both participants can run towards each other - it's not one way traffic! This is something I only thought of after seeing this post, so not everything may make sense, but I think it is understandable?"
I'd never heard this analogy before! I like it, it kind of makes sense to me. I might nab environmental challenges because it's tickled me. |
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The forums can become very competitive I find! But that's human nature I think x |
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What do you say to your friends, OP?
I only compete with my demons |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am single though, so maybe I'm doing it wrong. Made me smile "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I strive and aim to be better than every woman on here because it is important I feel like every man wants to raw dog and breed me in some kind of way that puts me above the rest. I start every morning with a chant.
I am better than them.
I am better than them.
I don't need validation.
I am better than them.
I only feel like this on Fab I'm not too bothered in real life.
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
The only thing I'm really competitive about is Connect 4 |
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By *ayHaychMan
over a year ago
Leeds (Home) / Sheffield (Work) |
I pity any man who sees fab as a competition. They will end up burnt out and posting an I’m leaving thread. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I am a strong and capable man.
- Colin Hughes |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I strive and aim to be better than every woman on here because it is important I feel like every man wants to raw dog and breed me in some kind of way that puts me above the rest. I start every morning with a chant.
I am better than them.
I am better than them.
I don't need validation.
I am better than them.
I only feel like this on Fab I'm not too bothered in real life."
I've got a new chant for you
You can't
Compete
With Ricky or Just Pete |
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?"
yes to get to 175 with a thread happens now and then |
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Is Fab competitive? Yes. In the Fab league table, I give each person 3 points for a veri and 1 point for a positive interaction on the forum. You're doing well, Meli.
But seriously, of course it's competitive. I think it has to be, but not necessarily overtly. But I assume we all want (some) attention from the people we like, and sometimes you might want that to come at the expense of others, even if you don't actively will that.
Not articulating it very well, as I think few people do it in a mean way (though you can spot the one-upmanship sometimes too, which is always good fun), but feels like human nature. Maybe I'm generalising too much! |
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The whole Fab ecosystem is a motherfucker of a competition. |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Travelling |
You are in the competition regardless of if you want to be or not. Even on here.
Everything in life, including life is a competition. Survival of the fittest, most suitable, attractive etc.
How you choose to talk on and fit in that competition is the only important perspective. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The whole Fab ecosystem is a motherfucker of a competition."
Did you just...swear?  |
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?"
No |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Wow. That will be a definite no from me.
I don't like those games nore do I want to be part of them 
If that's the reason people are on fab its maybe time we left.
We are here to enjoy sex with others!!!
Mrs C |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"I always come first, OP."
Oh, I know. |
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By *eartsmanMan
over a year ago
southeast , midlands, southern France |
Unfortunately there are some people on here that regard fabs as a competition, you only have to look at the fabs section on here to realise it. Some People post pics to get further up the fab list (sad but true). Others do it to get noticed. It's the kind of society we like in now . |
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By *EAT..85Woman
over a year ago
Nottingham |
"Eat or be eaten is my motto  "
I'm hungry  |
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Nearly all profile advice for men on here is based on the premise that we are in competition for attention; market yourself better, improve your profile bio, take better pictures; be more interesting, wear a suit, have nice shoes, remove the cock pics…
To me it feels less like a competition and more like lining up against the fence in the playground at school waiting to be picked by the Team Captains… |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
If I don’t get the girl its because she didn’t want me and that’s fine. She’s not a tender or vacancy I need to compete with others to try and win.
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By *EAT..85Woman
over a year ago
Nottingham |
I'm not sure if competition is the word I would choose. Recognition I think would be more fitting. The funny ones want to be laughed at, the hot ones want to be swooned over. The intellectuals want to be heard. The opinionated want to opinionate. The lonely ones just want to be noticed full stop. Otherwise why would we post photos and words on here at all? Whether it's just for your friend group or for strangers or for someone that appeals to you, we're all here looking to be seen. And sure: many of you will say you're not bothered if you go unnoticed, but it sure IS nice when you DO get noticed. |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"I'm not sure if competition is the word I would choose. Recognition I think would be more fitting. The funny ones want to be laughed at, the hot ones want to be swooned over. The intellectuals want to be heard. The opinionated want to opinionate. The lonely ones just want to be noticed full stop. Otherwise why would we post photos and words on here at all? Whether it's just for your friend group or for strangers or for someone that appeals to you, we're all here looking to be seen. And sure: many of you will say you're not bothered if you go unnoticed, but it sure IS nice when you DO get noticed. "
I notice you |
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What if someone is funny, intellectual, opinionated and lonely ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Life is competitive, it's a graft. Here is just an escape, a laugh etc. I could never compete with someone on Fab just to get a shag though, they can have them  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What if someone is funny, intellectual, opinionated and lonely ?"
Is that your way of saying you want a hug? |
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By *EAT..85Woman
over a year ago
Nottingham |
[Removed by poster at 08/08/23 11:40:36] |
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"Eat or be eaten is my motto
I'm hungry "
Do you have the appetite for a large portion? |
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By *EAT..85Woman
over a year ago
Nottingham |
"I'm not sure if competition is the word I would choose. Recognition I think would be more fitting. The funny ones want to be laughed at, the hot ones want to be swooned over. The intellectuals want to be heard. The opinionated want to opinionate. The lonely ones just want to be noticed full stop. Otherwise why would we post photos and words on here at all? Whether it's just for your friend group or for strangers or for someone that appeals to you, we're all here looking to be seen. And sure: many of you will say you're not bothered if you go unnoticed, but it sure IS nice when you DO get noticed.
I notice you "
It's my intellect, right? |
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"What if someone is funny, intellectual, opinionated and lonely ?
Is that your way of saying you want a hug?"
How would me having a hug help the funny, intellectual , opinionated , lonely person ?
|
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If it was a competition that would mean I’m potentially a prize and what a booby prize that would be……. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What if someone is funny, intellectual, opinionated and lonely ?
Is that your way of saying you want a hug?
How would me having a hug help the funny, intellectual , opinionated , lonely person ?
"
Can't even give away compliments these days. |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"I think to some it is but I guess so is life in general. On here there are numerous posts on how some get so many fabs on their posts, how nobody responds to them to the posts of how only the clique exists. But I guess we all to a point want to be popular and attractive.
I'll admit there are days where I think why do I bother? There is always someone who is more popular, attractive and just comes across better than I do. And Fab really does highlight these things to me at least. But that's when I know it's time to spend less time on here. So yeah I guess there are times my own insecurities make me feel it is a bit competitive on here. "
Ah thank you for the honesty Frida, it neatly ties in with your thread about authenticity.
I think that insecurities can definitely result in "competitive" behaviour - whether it's amusing veris because someone is worried about losing another or wants to keep another. The way a person responds - I've read it over the years with fallouts etc.
I think on the fora people can behave in a competitive manner and that's evident sometimes. Not every person, obviously but yes. Even threads like who has the best tits (I shuddered writing that), replies like this person has won etc.
I think knowing yourself and when to take a step back from a situation is a very good thing. |
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"What if someone is funny, intellectual, opinionated and lonely ?
Is that your way of saying you want a hug?
How would me having a hug help the funny, intellectual , opinionated , lonely person ?
Can't even give away compliments these days."
I'm okay for compliments. Can never have too many hugs tho.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You can’t view anything on fab or in life to do with relationships as a competition. It will lead to unhappiness eventually. |
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By *oxesMan
over a year ago
Southend, Essex |
"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?"
I originally joined this site through the advice of a freind as she thought it would help me get over an ex. (Which was shit advice) This advice ignores the 75:1 elephant in the room that being her experience as a single female on fab will be completely different to mine being a single male.
FAB is no different to dating sites in a way because there are normally a lot of men to women (with the exception of matched). On Dating sites the lack of opportunities means the men lessen their standards and become more competitive, broaderning who they like and match with in order to increase their chances. The females due to numbers and other factors become more conservative with their matches and likes, partly as a filter but also because they can because of sheer numbers well according to the research.
Now there is mathematical theory rather than an actual reality. The Male anommolies or the tndr 17%. The 17% males who receives more likes and matches than the average female. Of course perceaved attractiveness effects once chances.
All in all in this long post; is fab a competition. Technically yes but in practice no because of in my opinion it ignores the humen aspect and objectifies everyone as a means to an end. Yes we all choose to objectify ourselves on here to a certain extent by posting our photos, verifications etc. But surely being ultra competitive with regards to sex is off-putting?
Would be interesting to know the OPs thoughts on this subject at some point. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Compete with yourself and realistic set goals and ideals that mean something to you.
Dont live for or in other's shadow!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?
I originally joined this site through the advice of a freind as she thought it would help me get over an ex. (Which was shit advice) This advice ignores the 75:1 elephant in the room that being her experience as a single female on fab will be completely different to mine being a single male.
FAB is no different to dating sites in a way because there are normally a lot of men to women (with the exception of matched). On Dating sites the lack of opportunities means the men lessen their standards and become more competitive, broaderning who they like and match with in order to increase their chances. The females due to numbers and other factors become more conservative with their matches and likes, partly as a filter but also because they can because of sheer numbers well according to the research.
Now there is mathematical theory rather than an actual reality. The Male anommolies or the tndr 17%. The 17% males who receives more likes and matches than the average female. Of course perceaved attractiveness effects once chances.
All in all in this long post; is fab a competition. Technically yes but in practice no because of in my opinion it ignores the humen aspect and objectifies everyone as a means to an end. Yes we all choose to objectify ourselves on here to a certain extent by posting our photos, verifications etc. But surely being ultra competitive with regards to sex is off-putting?
Would be interesting to know the OPs thoughts on this subject at some point."
Spot on  |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"The only thing I'm really competitive about is Connect 4 "
Monopoly and Ex Libris for me. I've vowed to never play those games with people I'm attracted to because yep. No one's desire for me will be there at the end of the game. |
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By *essaMayWoman
over a year ago
Fairytale Wood |
People kid themselves that FAB and other social interactions whether actual or media are not competitive.
The guy who speaks louder then anyone else because he thinks his opinion is more valid to the female to makes the point of making herself the centre of attention.
Even in the forums/cha,t those that make inverse competitive comments. Like "there not here for the drama", "here for a laugh", "not competitive". are trying to differentiate themselves from those that seem to be, being competitive, which in effect is just another form of competition.
As above any kind of social interaction will always have a completive element - human nature, doesn't need to be the extremes you often see in chat and Forums but exists on every level
I need to go and lie down now |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"I strive and aim to be better than every woman on here because it is important I feel like every man wants to raw dog and breed me in some kind of way that puts me above the rest. I start every morning with a chant.
I am better than them.
I am better than them.
I don't need validation.
I am better than them.
I only feel like this on Fab I'm not too bothered in real life.
"
Thanks Lemmy, going to start using these words of affirmation while sipping moon water. |
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By *oxesMan
over a year ago
Southend, Essex |
"The only thing I'm really competitive about is Connect 4
Monopoly and Ex Libris for me. I've vowed to never play those games with people I'm attracted to because yep. No one's desire for me will be there at the end of the game. "
I don't know competitivess can be n attractive trait to have. It shows you have desire and are determined to do well |
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By *hagTonightMan
over a year ago
From the land of haribos. |
No. I dont. I am very relaxed about it |
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"The whole Fab ecosystem is a motherfucker of a competition.
·
Did you just...swear? "
•
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"Is Fab competitive? Yes. In the Fab league table, I give each person 3 points for a veri and 1 point for a positive interaction on the forum. You're doing well, Meli. "
Please no. Let's not have a fab league table. Let's not pretend I'm doing well at it either. I have far more veris than I display - I like to keep the majority to myself. :D
If it does exist, we need to deduct points for usernames that haven't been changed centuries later after they've been promised they will be. *cough cough*
"
But seriously, of course it's competitive. I think it has to be, but not necessarily overtly. But I assume we all want (some) attention from the people we like, and sometimes you might want that to come at the expense of others, even if you don't actively will that.
Not articulating it very well, as I think few people do it in a mean way (though you can spot the one-upmanship sometimes too, which is always good fun), but feels like human nature. Maybe I'm generalising too much!"
No, you've articulated it perfectly and I can understand your viewpoint. There's a distinction between competing with yourself and competing with others. In how it's handled. Shown. Yep, I understand YOLO. |
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By *tephanjMan
over a year ago
Kettering |
I'm not competing as I'm too old and would always lose  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"God no - I almost see competitiveness in terms of attention desperate if someone wants to get to know me they will and vice versa. I’m not about to go pipping myself against the woman of fab or comparing myself to them (this makes me cringe) I know my own worth and it certainly doesn’t come from a fab on a picture or a ‘can I smash your back doors in’ message "
This |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"Wow. That will be a definite no from me.
I don't like those games nore do I want to be part of them
If that's the reason people are on fab its maybe time we left.
We are here to enjoy sex with others!!!
Mrs C "
I don't think it's the reason people are on Fab. I think it can be a byproduct of it. If that makes sense? I'm not sure any more, my mind is an excited babble of thoughts and coherence is somewhat failing me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"People kid themselves that FAB and other social interactions whether actual or media are not competitive.
The guy who speaks louder then anyone else because he thinks his opinion is more valid to the female to makes the point of making herself the centre of attention.
Even in the forums/cha,t those that make inverse competitive comments. Like "there not here for the drama", "here for a laugh", "not competitive". are trying to differentiate themselves from those that seem to be, being competitive, which in effect is just another form of competition.
As above any kind of social interaction will always have a completive element - human nature, doesn't need to be the extremes you often see in chat and Forums but exists on every level
I need to go and lie down now "
Spot on |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?"
Nope.
It's a place to hang out, post shit in here and chat to people.
I've never seen Fab as any form of competition. That would mean you're trying to outdo someone else and I've no interest in that.
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The only thing I'm competing for is an early night. And I don't get that from fab.
F |
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?"
Not at all. We all have our own journey or reason for being on here. Good luck to all on here I say.
Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Competition on an NSA site? No.
With regards to forums, I'm not interested in attention or competition.
In life, the only person I compete against is myself.
xJess |
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"We are far too relaxed to be competitive about anything....except Monopoly as that's serious."
No one will play Monopoly with me. Seems I take it way too seriously. I think others just don’t take it seriously enough |
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I do find any competitive nature here odd behaviour....each to their own.
We all walk in the dark and each of us must learn to turn on his or her own light. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Competition on an NSA site? No.
With regards to forums, I'm not interested in attention or competition.
In life, the only person I compete against is myself.
xJess"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Constant competition with the whore from within me, and it seems like she's always winning. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If it is. I feel like I’m winning!!!!
Do I get a medal? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If it is. I feel like I’m winning!!!!
Do I get a medal? "
Woody, is that you sucking cock I see?
F |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If it is. I feel like I’m winning!!!!
Do I get a medal?
Woody, is that you sucking cock I see?
F"
Eh? What now? |
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?
Forums - not at all, I'm not as active and I don't stand a chance against the seasoned veterans on here anyway!
Attention of the person you find attractive - depends. Is it still a competition if you're the only competitor (but there are environmental challenges). The best analogy I can think of - it's a race with 2 people on opposite ends of the track. It's not a simple track though - there are hurdles you need to bypass and meandering paths you need to avoid. Oh, and both participants can run towards each other - it's not one way traffic! This is something I only thought of after seeing this post, so not everything may make sense, but I think it is understandable?
I have to run? Out."
Run / walk / crawl / infinitesimal displacement / stay still. You can even move in the opposite direction as long as your velocity is less than that of the person chasing you! (up to a point, we don't have infinite time) |
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?
Forums - not at all, I'm not as active and I don't stand a chance against the seasoned veterans on here anyway!
Attention of the person you find attractive - depends. Is it still a competition if you're the only competitor (but there are environmental challenges). The best analogy I can think of - it's a race with 2 people on opposite ends of the track. It's not a simple track though - there are hurdles you need to bypass and meandering paths you need to avoid. Oh, and both participants can run towards each other - it's not one way traffic! This is something I only thought of after seeing this post, so not everything may make sense, but I think it is understandable?
I'd never heard this analogy before! I like it, it kind of makes sense to me. I might nab environmental challenges because it's tickled me. "
I'm sorry, that phrase is copyright-protected. Happy to grant you usage rights if you ask for permission in my inbox. |
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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago
Redhill |
Haha not a competition, but someone local-ish tended to message anyone I’d met from my verifications and seek to meet them.
I never saw it as a competition as she was much hotter than me, haha. I found it amusing more than anything |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
No it never was and never will be. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I wouldn’t say I’m here to compete in the slightest, if anything, I’m here for a bit of a confidence boost for me. I completely admire those who are out there and living their best life and sampling all that fab has to offer in terms of clubs and socials etc and I hope someday I can find the confidence to attend them |
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It's forever a tooth and claw battle for number one on hot pics judging by how many people ask for Fabs |
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By *TG3Man
over a year ago
Dorchester |
"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?"
nope definitely not  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Fab is like a PE rounders session, we are all in the game whether we like it or not. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can't claim to have read very post on this thread but, seemingly unlike most, hell yes I am competitive and driven to meet people and to do so is to be "up against" women far younger, sexier, slimmer, more intelligent (the list is endless). So if I wasn't I would stand a cat in hell's chance. |
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By *phialtesMan
over a year ago
Beyond the Wall |
"Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?"
Competing online is just a path to misery. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?
Competing online is just a path to misery."
Bet it isn't. |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?
Competing online is just a path to misery.
Bet it isn't."
I just can't with you today.
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By *lansmanMan
over a year ago
Sheffield |
"It’s not a competition for me.I do a lot of lurking and watching of the forums and It is definitely a competition for some. "
Sane here . Once you give up with meets its obvious how competitive it is. From an anthropological viewpoint, sex is the ultimate competitive arena . |
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By *eli OP Woman
over a year ago
. |
"Haha not a competition, but someone local-ish tended to message anyone I’d met from my verifications and seek to meet them.
I never saw it as a competition as she was much hotter than me, haha. I found it amusing more than anything "
Oh I've had this! When I lived down South. It tickled me an awful lot - it wasn't even subtle. Maybe I have good taste. Unlikely.
It's odd but very amusing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't see it as competition but do find it easy to compare myself to others when it comes to who women meet or who they flirt with. It only tends to happen when I'm feeling a bit shit about myself though and wonder about my own perceived failings and what I must be doing wrong. It's a phase that passes though |
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By *VineMan
over a year ago
The right place |
As I’m not meeting at the moment, it’s not a competition. But when I was there was definitely an element of competition about it. Especially given the differences in the number of men and women on here (supply and demand). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Not at all op.
Forums are a place to air and vent or ask questions.
Should be fun for everyone.
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Nooooooooooo. I'm super competitive, but this isn't a competition.
Walk alongside me while I push along and THEN I'll get competitive  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"People kid themselves that FAB and other social interactions whether actual or media are not competitive.
The guy who speaks louder then anyone else because he thinks his opinion is more valid to the female to makes the point of making herself the centre of attention.
Even in the forums/cha,t those that make inverse competitive comments. Like "there not here for the drama", "here for a laugh", "not competitive". are trying to differentiate themselves from those that seem to be, being competitive, which in effect is just another form of competition.
As above any kind of social interaction will always have a completive element - human nature, doesn't need to be the extremes you often see in chat and Forums but exists on every level
I need to go and lie down now "
Amuses how this ‘human nature’ gets used as an excuse for everything from racism, selfishness, competition , but no one can ever say what it is exactly. So people who live by collaboration & interdependence - they must be aliens right ? |
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"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition "
Yes spot on, whether people want to acknowledge their in a competitive arena or not is another matter. By its nature fab is one big competition. As soon as you set up a profile, your vying to be noticed, to some degree or another... |
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By *oxesMan
over a year ago
Southend, Essex |
"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition
Yes spot on, whether people want to acknowledge their in a competitive arena or not is another matter. By its nature fab is one big competition. As soon as you set up a profile, your vying to be noticed, to some degree or another..."
In online marketing. I your not getting atention then your not reaching the desired audience with your content. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition
Yes spot on, whether people want to acknowledge their in a competitive arena or not is another matter. By its nature fab is one big competition. As soon as you set up a profile, your vying to be noticed, to some degree or another...
In online marketing. I your not getting atention then your not reaching the desired audience with your content."
Only if you’re missing the target audience. That doesn’t involve competitor marketing |
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By *oxesMan
over a year ago
Southend, Essex |
"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition
Yes spot on, whether people want to acknowledge their in a competitive arena or not is another matter. By its nature fab is one big competition. As soon as you set up a profile, your vying to be noticed, to some degree or another...
In online marketing. I your not getting atention then your not reaching the desired audience with your content.
Only if you’re missing the target audience. That doesn’t involve competitor marketing "
That's a fair point. People on fab experiment across brand. I mean couples and singles. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition
Yes spot on, whether people want to acknowledge their in a competitive arena or not is another matter. By its nature fab is one big competition. As soon as you set up a profile, your vying to be noticed, to some degree or another...
In online marketing. I your not getting atention then your not reaching the desired audience with your content.
Only if you’re missing the target audience. That doesn’t involve competitor marketing
That's a fair point. People on fab experiment across brand. I mean couples and singles."
There are some similarities yes. But it’s not quite the same |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition "
With all due respect, this is utter bollocks.
You're simply looking at this from your own perspective. Best girls/men what does that even mean? Your best could be my worst and vice versa. As soon as we start to depend on others approval and or appreciation from others we will never be content. Happiness does not rely on the dependency of others. So no, it's not a competition for me since I make my own choice and accept the fact it's ok to be different. We are different. It's what makes us special. Public opinions don't matter. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'll just post what I want. If you like my content great . I am not searching for rewards. The " Fab" if you want this or that is hilarious. The funny part is people are actually fabbing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I want my participation trophy |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'll just post what I want. If you like my content great . I am not searching for rewards. The " Fab" if you want this or that is hilarious. The funny part is people are actually fabbing."
The dependency to seek others approval to make ourselves feel happy is bewildering.
I say discover yourself, otherwise you have to depend on other people's opinions who don't know themselves. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I want my participation trophy "
Behave |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition "
I honestly can’t decide if this sarcasm or not 
Myself and many I know don’t do any of this and are very laid back about whether we meet others or not. It’s one way to meet partners out of many.
I have a pic of me on my balcony smoking a cigarette, various women have told me it’s awful and to take it down but fuck it, I really like it & it’s me.
I’m happy to meet max 3-4 people only at socials and stay out the li_elight. The exception would be on alcohol and always regretful.
I’d be disappointed if a thread I post got 175, with comments like ^this & popcorn or people hijacking to lamppost piss in the playground because it’s boring as fuck and if I was that popular it would imply I’m similar to the masses on here. If a small handful of interesting or challenging people responded it’s much better. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's very much based on a post I read in the early hours of the morning - it reminded me of something I say to my friends.
Do you see any part of Fab as being a competition? Whether it's vying for attention on the fora. Getting the attention of the person you find attractive. Do you see fab as being competitive? Are you competing for anything on here?"
Nope...not in the slightest do l see anything here as a competition of any sort , if a person is interested.. they're interested..if not .. they're not .. RESPECT is something that l value above all things here ... certainly not competition..who wants competition here ? I certainly don't anyway.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Do you think Fab is a competition?
Text your answer to 5318008 for your chance to win a date with Meli and a whopping £10 in cash! |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition
Yes spot on, whether people want to acknowledge their in a competitive arena or not is another matter. By its nature fab is one big competition. As soon as you set up a profile, your vying to be noticed, to some degree or another..."
Seriously ??? ..Each to their own here and respect etc etc but l am so glad l don't think like that at all. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
I know alot of people do just from their constant 'look at me - pay attention to me' posts, and I'm talking the blokes here, but personally it's a big fat NO. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition
With all due respect, this is utter bollocks.
You're simply looking at this from your own perspective. Best girls/men what does that even mean? Your best could be my worst and vice versa. As soon as we start to depend on others approval and or appreciation from others we will never be content. Happiness does not rely on the dependency of others. So no, it's not a competition for me since I make my own choice and accept the fact it's ok to be different. We are different. It's what makes us special. Public opinions don't matter."
Wi th all due respect, it’s my opinion. It may be ‘utter bollocks’ to you and that’s fine. If we all thought the same on everything how boring would life be? I’ll not be all billy big balls and bang on about having studied psychology for 8 years or anything but I don’t tend to offer opinions unless I’m confident in my views |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition
I honestly can’t decide if this sarcasm or not
Myself and many I know don’t do any of this and are very laid back about whether we meet others or not. It’s one way to meet partners out of many.
I have a pic of me on my balcony smoking a cigarette, various women have told me it’s awful and to take it down but fuck it, I really like it & it’s me.
I’m happy to meet max 3-4 people only at socials and stay out the li_elight. The exception would be on alcohol and always regretful.
I’d be disappointed if a thread I post got 175, with comments like ^this & popcorn or people hijacking to lamppost piss in the playground because it’s boring as fuck and if I was that popular it would imply I’m similar to the masses on here. If a small handful of interesting or challenging people responded it’s much better. "
It’s not sarcasm at all (for once). It’s an educated opinion |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition
I honestly can’t decide if this sarcasm or not
Myself and many I know don’t do any of this and are very laid back about whether we meet others or not. It’s one way to meet partners out of many.
I have a pic of me on my balcony smoking a cigarette, various women have told me it’s awful and to take it down but fuck it, I really like it & it’s me.
I’m happy to meet max 3-4 people only at socials and stay out the li_elight. The exception would be on alcohol and always regretful.
I’d be disappointed if a thread I post got 175, with comments like ^this & popcorn or people hijacking to lamppost piss in the playground because it’s boring as fuck and if I was that popular it would imply I’m similar to the masses on here. If a small handful of interesting or challenging people responded it’s much better. "
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition "
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition "
Absolutely this |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition "
I get the idea.
But I would genuinely delete my account if I felt these were my reasons or motivations for being here, I guess.
...I probably shouldn't have read this thread on reflection. |
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By *xydadbodMan
over a year ago
Milton keynes |
Wait, its a competition? Well, I would of never of thought that lol
Nah, in all honesty.. I don't quite see it as a competition really. I just do what I do and if people like it. Great.. if not, thats fine too can't please everyone can we?
Now if there was a dad dancing competition though.... well, thats different and I may suggest you lot stand back. This is gonna get ugly |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
Am not competitive in any way, shape or form. Fab should be fun |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hello, OP.
No one signs up to Fab to be competitive. That would be madness.
However, human nature dictates that there will be some elements of the great game that bring out the competitive nature in us. It is this competitive nature that drives the human race forward - none more so than in relationships and the way we interact with each other.
So in summary, Fab isn't competitive and neither is the concept of the "lifestyle". However, people are competitive and this will never change. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition
I get the idea.
But I would genuinely delete my account if I felt these were my reasons or motivations for being here, I guess.
...I probably shouldn't have read this thread on reflection."
I'd argue that presenting the best 'you' isn't necessarily about competition, just self awareness and a wish to look presentable. Sure, some compete for the hot pics accolades but they're a tiny minority.
As for socials? I go to meet people and be social. Not bothered who's better looking, got a better physique, tells the best gags or has the most interesting stories. I just like meeting and chatting to people.
And I've probably had a handful of threads in 15 years reach 175. I post what's on my mind, not expecting any level of interaction.
So panic not CD. You're not alone.
And sorry Fluffy but I have to disagree on all points I'm afraid.
I'd still give you a rub down with a bottle of almond oil and a sponge though......
A |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition "
I've been here 7 years and started hundreds of threads and posted hundreds of pics.
In all that time I've had 3 threads that have had more than 30 replies and it's a very long time since I reached double figure fabs on any of my pics.
If I was competing or trying to be popular I'd have given up a long time ago.
In fact from my experience over the years I can think of nothing worse than being fab popular because it seems to bring out the worst in people.
If this is how others approach this site then rock on but it hints at numerous insecurities. |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition
I get the idea.
But I would genuinely delete my account if I felt these were my reasons or motivations for being here, I guess.
...I probably shouldn't have read this thread on reflection.
I'd argue that presenting the best 'you' isn't necessarily about competition, just self awareness and a wish to look presentable. Sure, some compete for the hot pics accolades but they're a tiny minority.
As for socials? I go to meet people and be social. Not bothered who's better looking, got a better physique, tells the best gags or has the most interesting stories. I just like meeting and chatting to people.
And I've probably had a handful of threads in 15 years reach 175. I post what's on my mind, not expecting any level of interaction.
So panic not CD. You're not alone.
And sorry Fluffy but I have to disagree on all points I'm afraid.
I'd still give you a rub down with a bottle of almond oil and a sponge though......
A"
Morning Obi,
Self-awareness plays a part but in the respect of. Awareness of what works, I.e, best pictures of ourselves, an informative bio, that is a snap shot into our likes our interests, a little about us, that will attract people to us who have the same likes, interests, and may match us on a personality basis.
We hear all the time on threads about our profiles being the shop window, and we need to put effort into it to gain an optimum outcome. Basically intrest from those we are trying to garner intrest from.
If it wasn't competitive in anyway shape and form then this would not be necessary. I would argue this is more apt for single men, since single men being the predominate group on fab.
However, it comes down to a subjective perspective of fab, that we all carry.
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Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Absolutely it’s a competition. We project the best version of ourselves in order to get the best girls/men. We put our best pics up to get to page one of hot pics. We go to socials to be the best looking and funniest person in the room. We put thought into the threads we start so they get to 175 and we feel popular.
Whether we admit it or not it’s absolutely a competition
I get the idea.
But I would genuinely delete my account if I felt these were my reasons or motivations for being here, I guess.
...I probably shouldn't have read this thread on reflection.
I'd argue that presenting the best 'you' isn't necessarily about competition, just self awareness and a wish to look presentable. Sure, some compete for the hot pics accolades but they're a tiny minority.
As for socials? I go to meet people and be social. Not bothered who's better looking, got a better physique, tells the best gags or has the most interesting stories. I just like meeting and chatting to people.
And I've probably had a handful of threads in 15 years reach 175. I post what's on my mind, not expecting any level of interaction.
So panic not CD. You're not alone.
And sorry Fluffy but I have to disagree on all points I'm afraid.
I'd still give you a rub down with a bottle of almond oil and a sponge though......
A
Morning Obi,
Self-awareness plays a part but in the respect of. Awareness of what works, I.e, best pictures of ourselves, an informative bio, that is a snap shot into our likes our interests, a little about us, that will attract people to us who have the same likes, interests, and may match us on a personality basis.
We hear all the time on threads about our profiles being the shop window, and we need to put effort into it to gain an optimum outcome. Basically intrest from those we are trying to garner intrest from.
If it wasn't competitive in anyway shape and form then this would not be necessary. I would argue this is more apt for single men, since single men being the predominate group on fab.
However, it comes down to a subjective perspective of fab, that we all carry.
"
Ps obi, almond oil?! |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
"Hello, OP.
No one signs up to Fab to be competitive. That would be madness.
However, human nature dictates that there will be some elements of the great game that bring out the competitive nature in us. It is this competitive nature that drives the human race forward - none more so than in relationships and the way we interact with each other.
So in summary, Fab isn't competitive and neither is the concept of the "lifestyle". However, people are competitive and this will never change."
This we all are competitive and it's no bad thing. I don't understand why the general we try to hide it |
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |
