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Anyone fancy a fuck?

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon

I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

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By *ife NinjaMan  over a year ago

Dunfermline


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game? "

Yeah. Sounds hot

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Dam lady! I'm too tired for such sexy talk.

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Yeah. Sounds hot "

Oh... it is. Sweaty too

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Dam lady! I'm too tired for such sexy talk. "

I'd say I'm sorry... but you know I love to turn you on

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By *oveChavvMan  over a year ago

weymouth

Weymouth

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By *ife NinjaMan  over a year ago

Dunfermline


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Yeah. Sounds hot

Oh... it is. Sweaty too "

I'll bring a towel

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Weymouth "

OK...

What about Weymouth?

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By *eliusMan  over a year ago

Henlow


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game? "

Yeah, let me just fire up the Lear Jet. Shit! Forgot it’s having its wings waxed!

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Yeah. Sounds hot

Oh... it is. Sweaty too

I'll bring a towel "

Good call! Clothes peg for the nose too if I were you

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Only 21 minutes now

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Yeah, let me just fire up the Lear Jet. Shit! Forgot it’s having its wings waxed!"

Aww man! Story of my life

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Only 21 minutes now "

Shhhh... they're sleeping. I may be able to stretch the timing a little

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By *aitonelMan  over a year ago

Travelling

No!

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By *ife NinjaMan  over a year ago

Dunfermline


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Yeah. Sounds hot

Oh... it is. Sweaty too

I'll bring a towel

Good call! Clothes peg for the nose too if I were you "

I'm hard. I can cope

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By *uke_silverMan  over a year ago

London


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game? "

So that's what FAF means?! When even urban dictionary doesn't know this meaning of the abbreviation, it's hard to figure out. And it seems to be particularly common in the forums for some reason!

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By *r SproutMan  over a year ago

the middle


"Only 21 minutes now "

I can still do it 25 times then

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"No! "

But I got all dressed up in my trackies and coffee stained vest for you

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By *wistedsoul35Man  over a year ago

cumbria

I'll wait a bit.... with that sexy description, I'll probably only last about 30seconds

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By *ex HolesMan  over a year ago

Up North

Depends. How hairy is yer arsehole?

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Yeah. Sounds hot

Oh... it is. Sweaty too

I'll bring a towel

Good call! Clothes peg for the nose too if I were you

I'm hard. I can cope "

My hero

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

So that's what FAF means?! When even urban dictionary doesn't know this meaning of the abbreviation, it's hard to figure out. And it seems to be particularly common in the forums for some reason!"

Because it gets said so often and the long version is SO many letters

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Only 21 minutes now

I can still do it 25 times then "

Oooh... a repeater

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I'll wait a bit.... with that sexy description, I'll probably only last about 30seconds "

I know, right...

I'm bringing sexy back

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Depends. How hairy is yer arsehole? "

Dreadlocked baby

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By *aitonelMan  over a year ago

Travelling


"No!

But I got all dressed up in my trackies and coffee stained vest for you "

It is all too much to handle, first Lilith with a moustache and now you dressed like that. A man can only get so erect before it breaks.

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By *adMerWoman  over a year ago

Sandwich


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game? "

I am sure that 25 minutes in your company would be entirely entertaining, whatever state you are in. Apart from incapacitated

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"No!

But I got all dressed up in my trackies and coffee stained vest for you

It is all too much to handle, first Lilith with a moustache and now you dressed like that. A man can only get so erect before it breaks. "

You are so welcome

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

I am sure that 25 minutes in your company would be entirely entertaining, whatever state you are in. Apart from incapacitated "

I mean... I've got Cards Against Humanity... that could be fun too

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By *om and JennieCouple  over a year ago

Chams or Socials

[Removed by poster at 04/08/23 20:54:10]

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By *om and JennieCouple  over a year ago

Chams or Socials


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game? "

Only 3 weeks? I can plait my leg hair

J x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yes please

F

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Probably. It’s 9:05 after all.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

No thanks

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Only 3 weeks? I can plait my leg hair

J x"

I'm so jealous...

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Yes please

F"

I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Probably. It’s 9:05 after all. "

Rude.

No extension for you

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"No thanks "

Reasonable

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By *iddlesticksMan  over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.

NSP lay back think of England and enjoy my mediocrity.

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"NSP lay back think of England and enjoy my mediocrity. "

See. That's the kind of enthusiasm I'm looking for.

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By *dam1971Man  over a year ago

Bedford


"Yes please

F

I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast "

Looks like I’ll be late, which is unusual because I normally come early

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Am I too late?

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By *asty tatsyMan  over a year ago

london

As long as I can just lay there and not do much

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By *esi_maverickMan  over a year ago

Solihull

Yes please

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I could squeeze you in

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Yes please

F

I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast

Looks like I’ll be late, which is unusual because I normally come early "

Pffft

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Am I too late? "

13 minutes

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"As long as I can just lay there and not do much "

This will be the least energetic sex ever

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Yes please "

Drive fast...

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I could squeeze you in "

That's my line

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game? "

My kinda woman

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By *edeWoman  over a year ago

the abyss

Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!!

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

My kinda woman "

Score!

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!!"

I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

My kinda woman

Score! "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Yes please

F

I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast "

Just scoffing some pork scratchings first

F

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By *edeWoman  over a year ago

the abyss


"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!!

I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot "

Same - we can just blame it one each other

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Yes please

F

I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast

Just scoffing some pork scratchings first

F"

#sexymofo

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!!

I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot

Same - we can just blame it one each other "

This is promising...

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By *r.SJMan  over a year ago

Wellingborough


"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!!

I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot "

Ooh be like a water bed then and with my hairy legs and yours, it'd be like velcro so no getting away if you changed your mind.

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By *asterR and slut mayaMan  over a year ago

Bradford


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game? "

Oh I love a woman who talks dirty

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By *asty tatsyMan  over a year ago

london


"As long as I can just lay there and not do much

This will be the least energetic sex ever "

But still sec

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!!

I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot

Ooh be like a water bed then and with my hairy legs and yours, it'd be like velcro so no getting away if you changed your mind. "

The sexy just keeps coming

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Oh I love a woman who talks dirty

"

You're welcome

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By *edeWoman  over a year ago

the abyss


"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!!

I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot

Same - we can just blame it one each other

This is promising..."

Just get the hairdryer on the sheet and towel down after?

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"As long as I can just lay there and not do much

This will be the least energetic sex ever

But still sec "

True story...

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By *ynecplCouple  over a year ago

Newcastle upon Tyne


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game? "

Go on then, if we set off now we should be there in about 12 hours so that is plenty of time for you to walk the dogs, have a nap and comb your leg hair

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Ok but I'm not sleeping in the damp spot again!!

I'm so sweaty it's all damp spot

Same - we can just blame it one each other

This is promising...

Just get the hairdryer on the sheet and towel down after?"

Ooooh... bake the sweat in. I like it

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Go on then, if we set off now we should be there in about 12 hours so that is plenty of time for you to walk the dogs, have a nap and comb your leg hair"

For you... I'll style it

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By *isaB45Woman  over a year ago

Fabville

Absofuckinglutely. But I'm knackered, so please don't expect athletics

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By *ife NinjaMan  over a year ago

Dunfermline


"Absofuckinglutely. But I'm knackered, so please don't expect athletics "

Just lie there

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Absofuckinglutely. But I'm knackered, so please don't expect athletics "

How about an adjacent mind fuck?

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By *isaB45Woman  over a year ago

Fabville


"Absofuckinglutely. But I'm knackered, so please don't expect athletics

Just lie there "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Yes please

F

I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast

Just scoffing some pork scratchings first

F

#sexymofo"

OK, I know I'm a little late but I had some magic stars too. Don't hate me. Sex, now? I can't jiggle around too much though

F

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By *iddlesticksMan  over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.


"NSP lay back think of England and enjoy my mediocrity.

See. That's the kind of enthusiasm I'm looking for."

I’m nothing fancy f I’m not a shit shag.

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By *iddlesticksMan  over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.


"NSP lay back think of England and enjoy my mediocrity.

See. That's the kind of enthusiasm I'm looking for."

I’m nothing fancy f I’m not a shit shag.

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Yes please

F

I've put an extension on til 9.30... drive fast

Just scoffing some pork scratchings first

F

#sexymofo

OK, I know I'm a little late but I had some magic stars too. Don't hate me. Sex, now? I can't jiggle around too much though

F"

Ffs. This is sounding dangerous from a vomit perspective

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"NSP lay back think of England and enjoy my mediocrity.

See. That's the kind of enthusiasm I'm looking for.

I’m nothing fancy f I’m not a shit shag. "

Acceptable!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Shit. 35 minutes too late.

If there was a twat bus I'd not be on it. I'm such a twat I'd miss it!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game? "

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Shit. 35 minutes too late.

If there was a twat bus I'd not be on it. I'm such a twat I'd miss it! "

You're worth waiting for though

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

"

Is that a yes?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Assume the position

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Assume the position "

Fine. But you'll do all the work, right?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Sorry I’m washing my hair

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By *oodeggMan  over a year ago

Devon

I'm in but only because you Fab'ed my pic earlyer.. xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance?

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By *ong-leggedblondWoman  over a year ago

Next Door

I'm a shit shag. Shagging doesn't happen often.

I've been told that I can just lie there with my legs open and the guy thrusts his wanger in me a few times?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance? "

Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump!

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By *reative-mindMan  over a year ago

Exeter


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game? "

Is it 2 or 3 weeks because that's a deal breaker for me tbh.

If its 2 then no if its 3 then yes

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By *hagTonightMan  over a year ago

From the land of haribos.

Yes. I do, dont we all

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By *lirtymr_mrsCouple  over a year ago

Stockton-on-Tees

I'm quite d*unk, could probably get a semi going and see if I can tuck it in yer vag.

If I fall asleep while on top just roll me off.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Assume the position

Fine. But you'll do all the work, right? "

I graft

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance?

Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump! "

Jesus

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By *KloganMan  over a year ago

Ramsbottom


"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance? "

Sounds heavenly….

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By *esi_maverickMan  over a year ago

Solihull

I’d love to get some sexual attention

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Sorry I’m washing my hair "

I should maybe do that at some point...

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan  over a year ago

Den of Iniquity


"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance?

Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump!

Jesus "

I highly doubt it was him

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I'm in but only because you Fab'ed my pic earlyer.. xx "

It's a good pic

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance? "

Fuck yeah

Let's do it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance?

Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump!

Jesus

I highly doubt it was him "

Well he was a virgin wasn’t he

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I'm a shit shag. Shagging doesn't happen often.

I've been told that I can just lie there with my legs open and the guy thrusts his wanger in me a few times?

"

You learnt from the same place as me!

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Is it 2 or 3 weeks because that's a deal breaker for me tbh.

If its 2 then no if its 3 then yes "

It's definitely 3

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Yes. I do, dont we all "

I think some don't...

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I'm quite d*unk, could probably get a semi going and see if I can tuck it in yer vag.

If I fall asleep while on top just roll me off."

Now we're talking

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Assume the position

Fine. But you'll do all the work, right?

I graft "

I'm counting on it

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan  over a year ago

Den of Iniquity


"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance?

Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump!

Jesus

I highly doubt it was him

Well he was a virgin wasn’t he "

That was Mary

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I’d love to get some sexual attention "

Same. Same.

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By *d4fun73Man  over a year ago

Shipley


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game? "

Best offer I've had in ages!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Fine... roll and lift your leg a little.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance?

Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump!

Jesus

I highly doubt it was him

Well he was a virgin wasn’t he

That was Mary "

Oh I thought Jesus was too?

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Best offer I've had in ages! "

I'm a smooth talker

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Fine... roll and lift your leg a little."

You spoil me Lib

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By *ickshawedCouple  over a year ago

Wolverhampton

Depends. Have you got somewhere safe for me to put my wig and false teeth while I give you the best 27 seconds of your life?

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Depends. Have you got somewhere safe for me to put my wig and false teeth while I give you the best 27 seconds of your life? "

The dogs will look after them

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm a bit late to the party, but I haven't showered for a few days, and probably still smell of last weeks cum...any chance?

Leave it a few more days and you will be able to pull it out in one solidified lump! "

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By *iddlesticksMan  over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.


"Depends. Have you got somewhere safe for me to put my wig and false teeth while I give you the best 27 seconds of your life? "

I think we can do it in 25 to be fair.

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By *ickshawedCouple  over a year ago

Wolverhampton


"Depends. Have you got somewhere safe for me to put my wig and false teeth while I give you the best 27 seconds of your life?

I think we can do it in 25 to be fair. "

I'll set the stop watch. Now strip and let's see how quickly I can get you to heaven and back

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Fine... roll and lift your leg a little.

You spoil me Lib "

You won't feel a thing.

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Fine... roll and lift your leg a little.

You spoil me Lib

You won't feel a thing."

That's because I have a fanny like a wizard's sleeve

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By *lirtymr_mrsCouple  over a year ago

Stockton-on-Tees


"I'm quite d*unk, could probably get a semi going and see if I can tuck it in yer vag.

If I fall asleep while on top just roll me off.

Now we're talking "

best not to spoil things by talking.

Dick has gone a bit limp, just gonna rub it around the general area of your fanny in the hope something happens.

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By *esi_maverickMan  over a year ago

Solihull


"I'm quite d*unk, could probably get a semi going and see if I can tuck it in yer vag.

If I fall asleep while on top just roll me off.

Now we're talking

best not to spoil things by talking.

Dick has gone a bit limp, just gonna rub it around the general area of your fanny in the hope something happens."

Should we fuck???

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Fine... roll and lift your leg a little.

You spoil me Lib

You won't feel a thing.

That's because I have a fanny like a wizard's sleeve"

Oh, ok...

*hides chloroform*

Guess we'll actually just fuck?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game? "

Of course!

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I'm quite d*unk, could probably get a semi going and see if I can tuck it in yer vag.

If I fall asleep while on top just roll me off.

Now we're talking

best not to spoil things by talking.

Dick has gone a bit limp, just gonna rub it around the general area of your fanny in the hope something happens."

Reasonable

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Fine... roll and lift your leg a little.

You spoil me Lib

You won't feel a thing.

That's because I have a fanny like a wizard's sleeve

Oh, ok...

*hides chloroform*

Guess we'll actually just fuck?"

Woo hoo! Let's do it

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Of course! "

I make it sound so appealing

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By *omtom7Man  over a year ago

Tralee

Mmm yes, I'm falling in love

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By *esi_maverickMan  over a year ago

Solihull

Still waiting to fuck o

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By *ruceyyMan  over a year ago

London

Right now I fancy karaoke to be honest

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Mmm yes, I'm falling in love "

It's a risk

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Still waiting to fuck o "

It's pesky, innit

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Right now I fancy karaoke to be honest"

I'm sure somewhere in that there London you can do karaoke

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By *avexxMan  over a year ago

cheshire


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Of course! ,, lets walk the dogs together ,

I make it sound so appealing "

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By *ruceyyMan  over a year ago

London


"Right now I fancy karaoke to be honest

I'm sure somewhere in that there London you can do karaoke "

I cannot think of anything sadder than doing karaoke solo

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I've got 25 minutes before I have to take the dogs out for a walk... I'm full of cold, need a shower and haven't shaved my legs in 2 weeks. Maybe 3.

I promise to do the best impression of a sack of spuds that I can but I'll make you a brew after.

So... anyone game?

Of course! ,, lets walk the dogs together ,

I make it sound so appealing "

The little sods have collapsed. They did a mile and they can't handle it

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Right now I fancy karaoke to be honest

I'm sure somewhere in that there London you can do karaoke

I cannot think of anything sadder than doing karaoke solo "

I'm pretty sure if you use your imagination you could

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By *ruceyyMan  over a year ago

London


"Right now I fancy karaoke to be honest

I'm sure somewhere in that there London you can do karaoke

I cannot think of anything sadder than doing karaoke solo

I'm pretty sure if you use your imagination you could "

I also imagine ffms but it doesn't mean its happening posh x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'd love one right now but cba... can I just stick it in and someone push pack?

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"Right now I fancy karaoke to be honest

I'm sure somewhere in that there London you can do karaoke

I cannot think of anything sadder than doing karaoke solo

I'm pretty sure if you use your imagination you could

I also imagine ffms but it doesn't mean its happening posh x"

True story dear

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By *otSoPosh OP   Woman  over a year ago

In a ball gown because that's how we roll in N. Devon


"I'd love one right now but cba... can I just stick it in and someone push pack?"

That does sound like effort...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'd love one right now but cba... can I just stick it in and someone push pack?

That does sound like effort..."

Agonising. I just want to have sex without the effort but all the glory.

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By *ildmanYorksMan  over a year ago

Doncaster & Bembridge

Thank you for the invite Posh, it would be an honour

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By *eroLondonMan  over a year ago

Covent Garden

Not really. I'm not into the North Devon variety of lasses. Be lucky, duckie. I hope you find your Cavalier.

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By *esi_maverickMan  over a year ago

Solihull

Pass

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