FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > A foreplay question
A foreplay question
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So I was thinking about some sexual experiences and wondered if foreplay for you tends to revolve around oral?
I’ve been with women that make little effort, don’t do oral, and just want you to be ready to stick it in when they’re ready. I’m certain that women have many experiences of inattentive lazy men as well.
SO TELL ME, what non oral foreplay are you into?  |
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It’s different with different partners for me. But there’s always lots of kissing.
And I get where you’re coming from on this one Pickle. Some women don’t think us guys need foreplay. Those women are wrong. Or at least, they’re not my type. |
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Lots of kissing, groping, using hands, oral, spanking etc. Lots of fun to be had before any penetration and after too. I love taking my time playing with a cock well before it goes inside me and I love being groped and fingered and teased too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I enjoy foreplay more than the actual sex a lot of the time so lots of foreplay is really important for me. I think it can start before you’re even together so texting each other, really getting into each others head and building that anticipation can count as a form of foreplay. Being tactile, soft kisses or running my fingers over the parts of their body I know they like, teasing each other a little and the kissing! The kissing is important too. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It’s different with different partners for me. But there’s always lots of kissing.
And I get where you’re coming from on this one Pickle. Some women don’t think us guys need foreplay. Those women are wrong. Or at least, they’re not my type."
They really don’t and it really irks me. It’s hard to avoid them on the apps. Easier on fab. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Nipple play, kissing, neck kissing, touching all gets me in the mood. I’m not even a huge oral fan. I just wish foreplay with some people wasn’t so focused on oral to get you in the mood because it also sometimes feels like a quick suck to get you hard, put the Jimmy on and then do the sex. After you’ve been really attentive as well it totally ruins the sex for me |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Nipple play, kissing, neck kissing, touching all gets me in the mood. I’m not even a huge oral fan. I just wish foreplay with some people wasn’t so focused on oral to get you in the mood because it also sometimes feels like a quick suck to get you hard, put the Jimmy on and then do the sex. After you’ve been really attentive as well it totally ruins the sex for me "
This reads like a rant  |
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"Nipple play, kissing, neck kissing, touching all gets me in the mood. I’m not even a huge oral fan. I just wish foreplay with some people wasn’t so focused on oral to get you in the mood because it also sometimes feels like a quick suck to get you hard, put the Jimmy on and then do the sex. After you’ve been really attentive as well it totally ruins the sex for me "
Thats because they want you hard, but not to the point you cum because then they have to wait for the jiggy jiggy, unless you are a repeater!  |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
Foreplay doesn't tend to focus on oral sex (giving) for me but it's something I love and I've yet to be with someone who hasn't really enjoyed it. It's not something I do because I want to fuck, it's something I do because I adore it. It's not a precursor if that makes sense?
Actually Pickle, can I do this? Well, I'm going to. This idea of "fore"play is a tad heteronormative isn't it? Like it all leads to penetrative sex. Which, to be honest isn't my favourite part of sex.
I'm going with men for the following, mainly because it's assumed they're good to go with a flash of the quim.
There's so much I love doing - whether it's undressing as he watches me and tells me in a gruff voice to turn around so he can admire every inch of my curves.
The little texts, the voice notes that have my mind racing and provide an easy distraction I happily lean into and will time and time again.
It's making a man feel and know how much I want him.
It's those gentle kisses that give way to the more lustful kisses where you know they want to utterly devour you and savour the taste of you on their lips in the days to come.
It's straddling a man as he sits on a chair, teasingly dry humping him until he's groaning and uttering oh fuck with every kiss.
Or slowly, teasingly, giving him a lubed up handjob, relishing how very erect he becomes under your touch.
Those massages which start off innocent enough, my hands working into his muscles and soon enough they're teasingly wandering lower, just lightly grazing the head of his cock.
It's finding their erogenous zones and delighting in their responses to me - whether that's a little moan as I kiss their necks, trailing my fingers along their arms and watching them try and focus.
There's so much more to sex than oral. And I adore finding out how to really turn someone on, that desire feedback loop.
|
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"Nipple play, kissing, neck kissing, touching all gets me in the mood. I’m not even a huge oral fan. I just wish foreplay with some people wasn’t so focused on oral to get you in the mood because it also sometimes feels like a quick suck to get you hard, put the Jimmy on and then do the sex. After you’ve been really attentive as well it totally ruins the sex for me
Thats because they want you hard, but not to the point you cum because then they have to wait for the jiggy jiggy, unless you are a repeater! "
I would happily just give to completion, and then carry on with a massage, or something, until you are good to go again! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Foreplay doesn't tend to focus on oral sex (giving) for me but it's something I love and I've yet to be with someone who hasn't really enjoyed it. It's not something I do because I want to fuck, it's something I do because I adore it. It's not a precursor if that makes sense?
Actually Pickle, can I do this? Well, I'm going to. This idea of "fore"play is a tad heteronormative isn't it? Like it all leads to penetrative sex. Which, to be honest isn't my favourite part of sex.
I'm going with men for the following, mainly because it's assumed they're good to go with a flash of the quim.
There's so much I love doing - whether it's undressing as he watches me and tells me in a gruff voice to turn around so he can admire every inch of my curves.
The little texts, the voice notes that have my mind racing and provide an easy distraction I happily lean into and will time and time again.
It's making a man feel and know how much I want him.
It's those gentle kisses that give way to the more lustful kisses where you know they want to utterly devour you and savour the taste of you on their lips in the days to come.
It's straddling a man as he sits on a chair, teasingly dry humping him until he's groaning and uttering oh fuck with every kiss.
Or slowly, teasingly, giving him a lubed up handjob, relishing how very erect he becomes under your touch.
Those massages which start off innocent enough, my hands working into his muscles and soon enough they're teasingly wandering lower, just lightly grazing the head of his cock.
It's finding their erogenous zones and delighting in their responses to me - whether that's a little moan as I kiss their necks, trailing my fingers along their arms and watching them try and focus.
There's so much more to sex than oral. And I adore finding out how to really turn someone on, that desire feedback loop.
"
Your words Meli  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Foreplay doesn't tend to focus on oral sex (giving) for me but it's something I love and I've yet to be with someone who hasn't really enjoyed it. It's not something I do because I want to fuck, it's something I do because I adore it. It's not a precursor if that makes sense?
Actually Pickle, can I do this? Well, I'm going to. This idea of "fore"play is a tad heteronormative isn't it? Like it all leads to penetrative sex. Which, to be honest isn't my favourite part of sex.
I'm going with men for the following, mainly because it's assumed they're good to go with a flash of the quim.
There's so much I love doing - whether it's undressing as he watches me and tells me in a gruff voice to turn around so he can admire every inch of my curves.
The little texts, the voice notes that have my mind racing and provide an easy distraction I happily lean into and will time and time again.
It's making a man feel and know how much I want him.
It's those gentle kisses that give way to the more lustful kisses where you know they want to utterly devour you and savour the taste of you on their lips in the days to come.
It's straddling a man as he sits on a chair, teasingly dry humping him until he's groaning and uttering oh fuck with every kiss.
Or slowly, teasingly, giving him a lubed up handjob, relishing how very erect he becomes under your touch.
Those massages which start off innocent enough, my hands working into his muscles and soon enough they're teasingly wandering lower, just lightly grazing the head of his cock.
It's finding their erogenous zones and delighting in their responses to me - whether that's a little moan as I kiss their necks, trailing my fingers along their arms and watching them try and focus.
There's so much more to sex than oral. And I adore finding out how to really turn someone on, that desire feedback loop.
"
Perfectly put! It’s all those little things that just make it mind blowing!  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
I agree ‘foreplay’ is a tad heteronormative and actually that’s good learning for me to consider. Find another word. I usually include oral sex as sex.
But also actually is heteronormative the right word? I feel like it’s more gendered than that? Because I think the idea that penetrative sex is a predominantly or solely straight thing isn’t true also. That’s a separate thought for a different thread but anyway- let’s just call it the sex or soft play or whatever suits  |
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By *eliWoman
over a year ago
. |
"Foreplay doesn't tend to focus on oral sex (giving) for me but it's something I love and I've yet to be with someone who hasn't really enjoyed it. It's not something I do because I want to fuck, it's something I do because I adore it. It's not a precursor if that makes sense?
Actually Pickle, can I do this? Well, I'm going to. This idea of "fore"play is a tad heteronormative isn't it? Like it all leads to penetrative sex. Which, to be honest isn't my favourite part of sex.
I'm going with men for the following, mainly because it's assumed they're good to go with a flash of the quim.
There's so much I love doing - whether it's undressing as he watches me and tells me in a gruff voice to turn around so he can admire every inch of my curves.
The little texts, the voice notes that have my mind racing and provide an easy distraction I happily lean into and will time and time again.
It's making a man feel and know how much I want him.
It's those gentle kisses that give way to the more lustful kisses where you know they want to utterly devour you and savour the taste of you on their lips in the days to come.
It's straddling a man as he sits on a chair, teasingly dry humping him until he's groaning and uttering oh fuck with every kiss.
Or slowly, teasingly, giving him a lubed up handjob, relishing how very erect he becomes under your touch.
Those massages which start off innocent enough, my hands working into his muscles and soon enough they're teasingly wandering lower, just lightly grazing the head of his cock.
It's finding their erogenous zones and delighting in their responses to me - whether that's a little moan as I kiss their necks, trailing my fingers along their arms and watching them try and focus.
There's so much more to sex than oral. And I adore finding out how to really turn someone on, that desire feedback loop.
Your words Meli "
Thank you Pickle, that means a lot coming from you.
I'm not sure heteronormative is the best word choice, it's hard to explain. As I'm enjoying my sapphic desires once more I'm more aware of the focus on penetration. The expectations placed on men. But yes, different thread.
I love this one! It's enjoyable reading the myriad of responses, the similarities. |
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Too many to name as actual penetration sex is on the bottom of my list.
Feet worship
Kissing
Sucking my nipples
Squeezing my Boobs
Shoulder massage
Full body massage
Spooning
Watching porn together
Watching each other masturbate
Leaving his cologne scent in my car
Leaving erotic messages in places for me to find
Sending sexy pics videos voice notes
Cuddles on the sofa
Planning and initiating time out
Being spontaneous and following through
Having something planned Vs wyd txts
|
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"Nipple play, kissing, neck kissing, touching all gets me in the mood. I’m not even a huge oral fan. I just wish foreplay with some people wasn’t so focused on oral to get you in the mood because it also sometimes feels like a quick suck to get you hard, put the Jimmy on and then do the sex. After you’ve been really attentive as well it totally ruins the sex for me
Thats because they want you hard, but not to the point you cum because then they have to wait for the jiggy jiggy, unless you are a repeater! "
I agree with this … there have been plenty times ive gone too far with the oral and then there is not a chance i will cum because sex wont be long enough. If it gets cur short better chance of both of us cumming. I would happily suck again after to help them get hard again though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Kissing, spanking, lap dancing, performing, sucking, biting, teasing, plugging, tieing, probing  |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
I'd prefer it foreplay wasn't just oral.
Most men (from here)want a lot of sucking and very little else, before the penetration.
There has been some who kissed a lot and gave my boobs some attention.
If there's anything else it's me who instigates it.
|
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"Scratch that, what Meli said, she is a much better wordsmith!
I liked what you said I was just coming to reply to it "
I think that for me, giving oral is the act itself. But I dont just concentate on the phallus, the whole body can get involved, from nipples, for those that like it, to kissing the stomach, hips, thighs trailing tongues, flicking, blowing cool air, teasing, watching for a response to figure out what works, gentle, fast, smooth, mouth, hands, both, perineum, everywhere |
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"Scratch that, what Meli said, she is a much better wordsmith!
I liked what you said I was just coming to reply to it
I think that for me, giving oral is the act itself. But I dont just concentate on the phallus, the whole body can get involved, from nipples, for those that like it, to kissing the stomach, hips, thighs trailing tongues, flicking, blowing cool air, teasing, watching for a response to figure out what works, gentle, fast, smooth, mouth, hands, both, perineum, everywhere "
Tess knows exactly what I like and has never met me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Kissing, spanking, lap dancing, performing, sucking, biting, teasing, plugging, tieing, probing "
Hello waiter?…. I’m ready to order from the menu now. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You exchange brief oral then you have the intercourse.
Is that not how all sex goes??"
#notallsex!! .
Narrator- “This hashtag malarkey is becoming ridiculous now!!!”
#notallhashtags!
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Foreplay doesn't tend to focus on oral sex (giving) for me but it's something I love and I've yet to be with someone who hasn't really enjoyed it. It's not something I do because I want to fuck, it's something I do because I adore it. It's not a precursor if that makes sense?
Actually Pickle, can I do this? Well, I'm going to. This idea of "fore"play is a tad heteronormative isn't it? Like it all leads to penetrative sex. Which, to be honest isn't my favourite part of sex.
I'm going with men for the following, mainly because it's assumed they're good to go with a flash of the quim.
There's so much I love doing - whether it's undressing as he watches me and tells me in a gruff voice to turn around so he can admire every inch of my curves.
The little texts, the voice notes that have my mind racing and provide an easy distraction I happily lean into and will time and time again.
It's making a man feel and know how much I want him.
It's those gentle kisses that give way to the more lustful kisses where you know they want to utterly devour you and savour the taste of you on their lips in the days to come.
It's straddling a man as he sits on a chair, teasingly dry humping him until he's groaning and uttering oh fuck with every kiss.
Or slowly, teasingly, giving him a lubed up handjob, relishing how very erect he becomes under your touch.
Those massages which start off innocent enough, my hands working into his muscles and soon enough they're teasingly wandering lower, just lightly grazing the head of his cock.
It's finding their erogenous zones and delighting in their responses to me - whether that's a little moan as I kiss their necks, trailing my fingers along their arms and watching them try and focus.
There's so much more to sex than oral. And I adore finding out how to really turn someone on, that desire feedback loop.
"
A game foreplay needed for you lady... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It's definitely about mental stimulation for me. A few naughty texts, some lingering looks, knowing Rob is hard... and the anticipation can get me very wet so any touch becomes electric |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"You exchange brief oral then you have the intercourse.
Is that not how all sex goes??
Yes. Yes, actually it is.
Nailed it
"
Do you get nailed often? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"You exchange brief oral then you have the intercourse.
Is that not how all sex goes??
Yes. Yes, actually it is.
Nailed it
Do you get nailed often? "
Define often? |
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"Foreplay doesn't tend to focus on oral sex (giving) for me but it's something I love and I've yet to be with someone who hasn't really enjoyed it. It's not something I do because I want to fuck, it's something I do because I adore it. It's not a precursor if that makes sense?
Actually Pickle, can I do this? Well, I'm going to. This idea of "fore"play is a tad heteronormative isn't it? Like it all leads to penetrative sex. Which, to be honest isn't my favourite part of sex.
I'm going with men for the following, mainly because it's assumed they're good to go with a flash of the quim.
There's so much I love doing - whether it's undressing as he watches me and tells me in a gruff voice to turn around so he can admire every inch of my curves.
The little texts, the voice notes that have my mind racing and provide an easy distraction I happily lean into and will time and time again.
It's making a man feel and know how much I want him.
It's those gentle kisses that give way to the more lustful kisses where you know they want to utterly devour you and savour the taste of you on their lips in the days to come.
It's straddling a man as he sits on a chair, teasingly dry humping him until he's groaning and uttering oh fuck with every kiss.
Or slowly, teasingly, giving him a lubed up handjob, relishing how very erect he becomes under your touch.
Those massages which start off innocent enough, my hands working into his muscles and soon enough they're teasingly wandering lower, just lightly grazing the head of his cock.
It's finding their erogenous zones and delighting in their responses to me - whether that's a little moan as I kiss their necks, trailing my fingers along their arms and watching them try and focus.
There's so much more to sex than oral. And I adore finding out how to really turn someone on, that desire feedback loop.
"
This ^ |
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"I enjoy foreplay more than the actual sex a lot of the time so lots of foreplay is really important for me. I think it can start before you’re even together so texting each other, really getting into each others head and building that anticipation can count as a form of foreplay. Being tactile, soft kisses or running my fingers over the parts of their body I know they like, teasing each other a little and the kissing! The kissing is important too. "
This! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Foreplay for me begins long before we get naked.
Its the flirty exchanges, it's the look in the eyes, it's a little touch, it's the conversation, the kisses, being almost a little too tactile in public, it's intense and passionate kisses as well as those little ones part way through a conversation. It's hands and fingers. Very deliberately stroking fingers or forearms and locking eyes with a look that says so much.
Its kisses that promise more.
Its being kissed so hard it almost takes your breath away the moment you're alone.
Its the way you remove each others clothes, slowly unwrapping each other and all the touching, teasing, kissing, grinding against each other that it involves.
Its so so so much before you even get to oral. It's also so much more during and after too.
I love and crave all of it. Giving and receiving. It's a mutual journey of passionate discovery. Every twist and turn more exciting and arousing than the last. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Foreplay for me begins long before we get naked.
Its the flirty exchanges, it's the look in the eyes, it's a little touch, it's the conversation, the kisses, being almost a little too tactile in public, it's intense and passionate kisses as well as those little ones part way through a conversation. It's hands and fingers. Very deliberately stroking fingers or forearms and locking eyes with a look that says so much.
Its kisses that promise more.
Its being kissed so hard it almost takes your breath away the moment you're alone.
Its the way you remove each others clothes, slowly unwrapping each other and all the touching, teasing, kissing, grinding against each other that it involves.
Its so so so much before you even get to oral. It's also so much more during and after too.
I love and crave all of it. Giving and receiving. It's a mutual journey of passionate discovery. Every twist and turn more exciting and arousing than the last. "
Oh ….. ALL OF THIS!!! Sounds like my perfect type of day.
If someone can have me look at them and I want to touch or wanting to steal a kiss, we’ve already started the foreplay. |
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See this is why communication is so important. There is no wrong or right way. I believed for years I didn't like sex ! The whole traditional foreplay thing for me is a turn off. There is nothing wrong with me I just don't like things that majority like.
It's why I struggle with compatibility even when swinging. Kissing, stroking, dirty talk, receiving oral for me is not a turn on.
Each to their own , it doesnt make me wrong, just different. I seek out partners who like the same stuff as me, compatibility is key |
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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago
South Wales |
Kissing, touching their skin, sniffing them (men smell lush), massage, teasing their cock by stroking gently, caressing their balls, attending to their nipples (if they like that).
Then. It’s sucking their cock time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Too many to name as actual penetration sex is on the bottom of my list.
Feet worship
Kissing
Sucking my nipples
Squeezing my Boobs
Shoulder massage
Full body massage
Spooning
Watching porn together
Watching each other masturbate
Leaving his cologne scent in my car
Leaving erotic messages in places for me to find
Sending sexy pics videos voice notes
Cuddles on the sofa
Planning and initiating time out
Being spontaneous and following through
Having something planned Vs wyd txts
"
Love everything listed! |
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Not much in the mood for sexy thinking at the moment, but I believe in hours and hours of prolonged foreplay, reading it as: conversations, caressing, actually stimulating, oral sex, rope play…you name it, and I’m probably more interested in that than the actual penetration part, though I also like that part  |
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Giving her a massage, Running your fingers through her hair and over her neck, then using your hands on her shoulders and moving down her back pushing them knots out, Listening to her little moans as you hit the right spots, A great way to build up your sexual frustration before having sex |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Foreplay usually gets skipped unless we have free time, but if we do have the time it's usually start with passionate kissing then me giving her a clitoral massage with my finger, occasionally sliding my finger in and out of her to spread the moisture then after some time I'll kiss down her body to the top of her hips then I'll tickle her knicker line with my beard kissing as I go slowly moving down then I'll gently massage her clit with my tongue whilst moving one or two fingers in and out making sure she's enjoying herself but never letting her orgasm, then when I'm about to burst I'll stop lean back and take my manhood rubbing on her lady parts before thrusting..... Well you get the point it's about the foreplay |
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