FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you go out by yourself?
Do you go out by yourself?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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To a restaurant, pub, cinema or anywhere else usually for 2 people or more where there will lots of people.
Could you spend a day alone in a big city like london and visit tourist attractions and enjoy yourself?
Years ago I couldn't do it. It would make me nervous. I'd avoid and think I looked a loner etc. Now I couldn't care less and love it.
Have you experienced that? |
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"To a restaurant, pub, cinema or anywhere else usually for 2 people or more where there will lots of people.
Could you spend a day alone in a big city like london and visit tourist attractions and enjoy yourself?
Years ago I couldn't do it. It would make me nervous. I'd avoid and think I looked a loner etc. Now I couldn't care less and love it.
Have you experienced that? "
no choice really  |
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Happy in my own company. But when I'm out alone I find I talk to more people. I ask locals for advice and just chat generally.
So, ironically, I spend more time interacting than many couples who seem to spend time on their phone and ignore each other  |
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I’ve been to all sorts of places on my own for work stuff - lots of European cities and even to the US. So now I don’t have a problem. Always in cafes by myself, and sometimes restaurants and even the cinema if there is something I really want to see and Ailsa can’t come. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have in the past as I've worked away from home a lot. In general though as I've been in long term relationships most of my life I haven't really and certainly not with a view to meeting someone whilst out (not that the topic intones this is why you are out BTW).
Is it actually harder for women to go out alone? I'm guessing that you get approached more often than not whilst out especially in pubs for instance wether you want to be or not and there's the safety element getting to and from etc that can't exactly be encouraging to go out alone. As a guy I've never experienced the latter safety element so walking to and from a pub at night has never been a concern for me |
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Yes indeed  I am by far the most interesting person I know and love my own company.
Also, certainly as regards sight seeing, I find I can actually take the time to enjoy it and savour it far more alone, without the conversation of others interjecting over it.
Jesus….I sound like a tight miserable, antisocial sod now don’t I? 
I will now go and fondle my own buttocks  |
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I find it quite difficult to make friends (recently found out I have social anxiety) and my family don't live locally so if Mr R is busy with sports etc I'm more than happy to go out and about by myself. I've no problem being in restaurants or cafes alone as I usually have a book on Kindle app on the go. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I mainly do this with concerts and gigs. My friends and I have very different tastes in music.
And going to cinema alone is one of my fav things to do."
And Weymouth haha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t now but when I was single I did loads of stuff like that by myself. Never a restaurant though, don’t know why but I wouldn’t have the guts for that!  |
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"When I was 21 (hubby), I went to Australia for 3 months on my own. It’s much better as people are generally more friendly if you are on your own."
Maybe it's because I'm an older woman but I find people very unfriendly to people who are on their own |
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Absolutely all the time. Even of the Greece tomorrow on my own. It's great going with someone else but not gonna let anything stop me doing the things I want to do. Plus I'm a very sociable person so usually end up chatting with other people. |
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By *mo512Man
over a year ago
LONDON |
"I mainly do this with concerts and gigs. My friends and I have very different tastes in music.
And going to cinema alone is one of my fav things to do.
And Weymouth haha "
Oh definitely Weymouth  |
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"To a restaurant, pub, cinema or anywhere else usually for 2 people or more where there will lots of people.
Could you spend a day alone in a big city like london and visit tourist attractions and enjoy yourself?
Years ago I couldn't do it. It would make me nervous. I'd avoid and think I looked a loner etc. Now I couldn't care less and love it.
Have you experienced that? "
I go and do stuff on my own, yes. I stick out like a sore thumb anyway, and so I've learned to ignore any odd looks and just enjoy myself. |
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"To a restaurant, pub, cinema or anywhere else usually for 2 people or more where there will lots of people.
Could you spend a day alone in a big city like london and visit tourist attractions and enjoy yourself?
Years ago I couldn't do it. It would make me nervous. I'd avoid and think I looked a loner etc. Now I couldn't care less and love it.
Have you experienced that? "
Nope! I hate doing stuff on my own, not because I’m shy or nervous, because I want to share experiences with someone I like. Whether that’s a friend or partner it matters not. I want to share the experience as we have it, then talk about the memories long afterwards. That enriches everything immeasurably, to me. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I have in the past as I've worked away from home a lot. In general though as I've been in long term relationships most of my life I haven't really and certainly not with a view to meeting someone whilst out (not that the topic intones this is why you are out BTW).
Is it actually harder for women to go out alone? I'm guessing that you get approached more often than not whilst out especially in pubs for instance wether you want to be or not and there's the safety element getting to and from etc that can't exactly be encouraging to go out alone. As a guy I've never experienced the latter safety element so walking to and from a pub at night has never been a concern for me "
To be fair I've not braved a bar or pub alone but that's down to the fact I hardly ever drink. I'd go to a pub for food though. But yes I think some places would deter a woman from going alone. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yes indeed I am by far the most interesting person I know and love my own company.
Also, certainly as regards sight seeing, I find I can actually take the time to enjoy it and savour it far more alone, without the conversation of others interjecting over it.
Jesus….I sound like a tight miserable, antisocial sod now don’t I?
I will now go and fondle my own buttocks "
No you don't at all. Isn't that the point though, not having anyone else to think about or listen to allows for you to fully enjoy any experience at your own leisurely place, and ponder if you need to.
I love an art gallery and going with someone else just isn't the same. |
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I've been so used to doing things as a couple going bars clubs concerts cinema even walking along the southbank by river Thames so doing them things alone i couldn't. I've been to a bar waiting on a mate jeeeez he took forever, I've never seen anyone sit in a bar alone on a Friday evening but I did and found it awkward as there normally group guys or girls together on night out. So basically I rather do stuff with a partner or friends more fun too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Pubs are my go to social environment really. I like food and beer and wine and gin I don't generally have people bother me when I am out if I don't wanna talk to anyone
I would definitely go back to the natural history museum on my own as my pesky kids pulled me from pillar to post last time (yes we went for them I know) and I didn't spend much time in the bits I wanted to see. |
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I work away a lot and have not really kept in touch with people back home so when I am home I do a lot on my own, for holidays I am always away by myself, most of the time it’s London I go to, much easier to get good theatre tickets for 1 |
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
Yes
At times when plans just fall apart if I'm dressed and ready to go I'm going regardless I'm a sociable guy doesn't get lonely for long. Plus I've done a fair bit of travelling on my own and just jump in head first if I like it I'm doing it's amazing how many friends you're able to gather in this journey of life |
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A meal no, I like chatting with someone as I'm eating and drinking.
Sight seeing or museum and such like, more than happy by myself. Even if I go to a museum with the other half, I tend to loose him for a considerable amount of time as we're concentrating on what we're looking at. |
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"A meal no, I like chatting with someone as I'm eating and drinking.
Sight seeing or museum and such like, more than happy by myself. Even if I go to a museum with the other half, I tend to loose him for a considerable amount of time as we're concentrating on what we're looking at. "
You meant he tries to lose you but you find him eventually 
My parents tried this in a big shopping center when I was young  |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
One pf the things that I noticed when I moved from London to Hertfordshire is that eating alone is seen as weird here but in London no one gave you a second look.
I have no issues doing things alone,I very much like my own company |
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"A meal no, I like chatting with someone as I'm eating and drinking.
Sight seeing or museum and such like, more than happy by myself. Even if I go to a museum with the other half, I tend to loose him for a considerable amount of time as we're concentrating on what we're looking at.
You meant he tries to lose you but you find him eventually
My parents tried this in a big shopping center when I was young "
Idiot!!! I have a tendency of wondering off when I'm in museums. Who'd want to loose me on purpose? I mean I'm amazing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have track my location on each others phones switched on so we can find each other when we wander off and get lost
Very handy also on the three occasions so far this year she's lost her phone whilst out |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Live in Leicester work in London say many a times in a pub on my own even did the London eye on my own would be nice for more people to be up for socials |
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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago
Redhill |
All the time. It is all I do between flights. Enjoying the sights, restaurants, places of interest. 95% of the time all by myself and enjoying it every minute.
I have always been very happy in my own company. |
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I can and I do.
And then I have experiences where sharing those moments with someone special is transcendent.
I can have moments of pure joy just talking to someone on a wall in dingy corner, of a tired old town.
I've been on a date to Alton tower and we spent 4 hours, drinking coffee and eating doughnuts lol |
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By *viatrixWoman
over a year ago
Redhill |
All the time. It is all I do between flights. Enjoying the sights, restaurants, places of interest. 95% of the time all by myself and enjoying it every minute.
I have always been very happy in my own company. |
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By *avie65Man
over a year ago
In the west. |
I go on holiday by myself, it does take a bit of getting used to though. Once you get used to is it is fantastic as you can do what you want when you want without thinking about others wants and needs. |
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Would I go abroad, pub drinking, fancy restaurant by myself.... No.
But would I go visit a city, coast, a gig, cinema, eating in a pub by myself... Yes and have done.
It's all about what you're comfortable with. |
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By *r_PinkMan
over a year ago
london stratford |
I used to.
But since becoming unemployed, covid caused me mental health issues and then cost of living issues have become unbearable.
So now I am Pinkynomates and stay home unless I go and meet friends or go to socials.
AND while I am having my teeth sorted I wont be going out until August. |
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Yes I have done. When I was well enough I would travel to a different town. Take myself for a nice lunch. That was one of my favourite things to do.
My sister went back packing round eastern Europe for three months and came back with a husband |
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By *edeWoman
over a year ago
the abyss |
I'd never have anything in my life had I not just done it on my own.
I love traveling and wandering a city in my own although I've never gone abroad solo. This is more to do with time and money.
Planning on booking a Bruges Christmas market this year though  |
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By *aveonMan
over a year ago
Dartford |
Reading this all with interest - I never ever get time alone and frankly I’m very envious of you all - key thing is that you go where you want, when it suits you
Now I don’t want to tempt fate, but the thought of holidaying alone and going out alone is something I’d love to do |
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I’ve done a few music festivals on me tod, including Glastonbury and a few small ones.
Also done a gig and pubs alone too. It can mate you chat to people more than you would if you want the interaction. |
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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago
yumsville |
I've been on holiday on my own but as you meet people it's easier to get something to eat or drink in company. People watching is more or less a given abroad too so you feel less uncomfortable as than you would in a restaurant down the road, where you're usually hurried along.
Going out then for a drink or meal for me is a no, I don't drink (or at least not enough to spur me into getting myself one in at the local), and I can't relax enough to enjoy a meal by myself - Same with the cinema, I know plenty do, just most are an anticlimax anyway. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I always prefer company, but I have no issues going out by myself. Street photography, my hobby, offers a perfect excuse anyway."
I'd love to do street photography but I just worry about hassle and standing out. I feel like a guilty criminal whenever I try. |
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"A meal no, I like chatting with someone as I'm eating and drinking.
Sight seeing or museum and such like, more than happy by myself. Even if I go to a museum with the other half, I tend to loose him for a considerable amount of time as we're concentrating on what we're looking at.
You meant he tries to lose you but you find him eventually
My parents tried this in a big shopping center when I was young
Idiot!!! I have a tendency of wondering off when I'm in museums. Who'd want to loose me on purpose? I mean I'm amazing "
You shouldn't call yourself a idiot, it's not your fault you get yourself lost  |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
Not often, not by choice. Because I travel a lot it happens though and am OK with it but I’d rather be with people.
The exception would be street photography, prefer to be alone for that. I like the idea of cinema alone but never done it. |
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By *osco78Man
over a year ago
Sheffield |
"I always prefer company, but I have no issues going out by myself. Street photography, my hobby, offers a perfect excuse anyway.
I'd love to do street photography but I just worry about hassle and standing out. I feel like a guilty criminal whenever I try. "
I once had someone try and stop me doing that ,saying it was health and safety and not allowed
Silly fool |
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By *oanne ETV/TS
over a year ago
Near Warrington |
Been going away on my own for 8 years since the wicked witch flew off and that includes home and abroad . I also go to live music, festivals etc on my own. I love it but the only thing I miss sometimes is going out for dinner.
I've also had a lot more sex than I could ever imagine  |
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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago
Dubai & Nottingham |
Last October I did my first ever proper solo mini break , 5 days street photography in Lisbon, and a nice spa hotel. Long days from 5am to get sunrise and avoid crowds , mid day naps and back out for sunsets, but I got bored after and ended up on Tinder dates most evenings |
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By *ornyguyMan
over a year ago
Hillsborough, NI |
Happy to go to restaurants on my own, usually if working away or just out and about on my own and need food.
I often go to concerts on my own, I am there to enjoy the music and not needing someone to chat to. If it's a rock concert I'd probably abandon the people I'm with anyway and end up in a crush at the front. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Last October I did my first ever proper solo mini break , 5 days street photography in Lisbon, and a nice spa hotel. Long days from 5am to get sunrise and avoid crowds , mid day naps and back out for sunsets, but I got bored after and ended up on Tinder dates most evenings"
I find this with holidays, as a single mum traveling with children, they would crash out and the loneliness would hit.
This year as they are much older it might not happen. |
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A mate of mine used to go to the cinema alone which i thought was wierd, until i did it. I do recommend, no one asking me stupid questions or interrupting.
Other than that i can go out alone no problem. |
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"To a restaurant, pub, cinema or anywhere else usually for 2 people or more where there will lots of people.
Could you spend a day alone in a big city like london and visit tourist attractions and enjoy yourself?
Years ago I couldn't do it. It would make me nervous. I'd avoid and think I looked a loner etc. Now I couldn't care less and love it.
Have you experienced that? "
I have been to the cinema on my own and for some reason I had to work myself up to actually walk in alone haha can’t believe I was nervous about it |
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I have done so for many years, also I was 25 on my first solo holiday to Greece and the nudist beaches.
I guess because I've always done what I wanted to do, and all my mates were busy getting married and kids, and I thought I'm not going to miss out just because I don't have anyone to go with |
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I find myself lovely company, so do loads of things by myself these days, if I feel like doing something and people are either busy or dont fancy it I'll go alone.
That said it would be brilliant to find a like minded plus 1 for more or my random ventures. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Did it a couple of weeks ago for the very first time. A whole day to myself. Sitting in a pub having a lunch, pretending I’d been stood up…
I even waved in random locations as if I’d seen who I was looking for and crossed the roads. Great fun.
Do a want to do it again? No, I’d rather share a day with someone and enjoy it that way.
Will I do it again? I guess I’ll have to it I’ll miss life won’t I?  |
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I'm happy doing most things by myself these days. Quite often in a cafe reading a paper and enjoy lunch or stopping for coffee on a long walk or a nice beer in summer. Only thing I've not done by myself so far is a foreign holiday, I'm thinking about it though. Haven't been abroad for quite a while now. |
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I go to the theatre or comedy shows alone quite frequently.
The reason being that I find it easier than having to fit around other people ..... I just go , enjoy it and go home.
I would eat a meal alone but only during the day.
I'd never go out for dinner alone. I have no idea why - different vibe I think .... the night belongs to lovers
I ALWAYS shop alone if I can. I have NO interest at all in wandering around shops looking at what someone else likes.
I do like company for museums , galleries , outings etc although I will do them alone.
I won't go without what I want to do cos no one else wants to do it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To a restaurant, pub, cinema or anywhere else usually for 2 people or more where there will lots of people.
Could you spend a day alone in a big city like london and visit tourist attractions and enjoy yourself?
Years ago I couldn't do it. It would make me nervous. I'd avoid and think I looked a loner etc. Now I couldn't care less and love it.
Have you experienced that? "
I can’t do restaurants unless it’s lunchtime, the dinner time thing still gets me. Funnily enough can do it overseas, just not here.
I regularly take myself out on dates. I go for a really nice lunch, go to an exhibition or see a show.
I’ve made myself undateable, I always give myself a fabulous day out, I do all the things I love, I wear clothes I love, do it in my own time and I always get a big O at the end of the day.
It’s going to be hard to find someone that can add to my life. |
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By *ubal1Man
over a year ago
Newry Down |
The vast majority of my time awake is spent alone; but I am perfectly at ease intereacting with people, almost invariably in brief casual conversations about nothing in particular.
Years ago, I was involved in a number of very toxic relationships, but I got away from those: in one instance when the guy got married to an older woman who wanted to isolate him from friends and family; and in another instance when the guy moved away to another city.
I am usually alone, but I never feel isolated, cos' I have so many interests.
The key, for me, is to structure my time so that I feel I am making progres on many different fronts, simultaneously.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No, I just see others with friends and other people and suddenly feel very exposed and the loneliness really kicks in. So I just wait for my friends or a friend to be free so I can do stuff with them. |
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By *ave05Man
over a year ago
Chelmsford Essex |
Plenty of lone time here too and quite at ease especially with a tour guide background in London to wander and pause find hidden spaces a drink / meal / hike.
Would enjoy meeting a “go to” occasional drinking/coffee companion though non sexual for a social interaction to break some solitude up especially when friends are so busy I find that is missing somewhat for me at times. |
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"To a restaurant, pub, cinema or anywhere else usually for 2 people or more where there will lots of people.
Could you spend a day alone in a big city like london and visit tourist attractions and enjoy yourself?
Years ago I couldn't do it. It would make me nervous. I'd avoid and think I looked a loner etc. Now I couldn't care less and love it.
Have you experienced that? "
Do most things alone including holidays. Being alone does not bother me. |
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