Haven't seen a recent joke thread so.....
I was driving up the road when my boss called, he said ‘you have been promoted to manager’
I thought wow fantastic, so I continued my journey and he calls again ‘you’ve been promoted further, you're the managing director’
Very pleased I drive further only for him to call again ‘you’ve been appointed CEO, you're top level’
Excitedly I swerved, came off the road and hit a tree.
The police came and asked what happened.
I told them.......... ‘I careered off the road’
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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An old couple were re-living their youth, doing all the things they used to do when they were young and dating.
One night they took a walk down a country lane and the woman says with a flint in her eye "I want you to make love to me against that fence like you did all those years ago"
The old man notices her body is convulsing as they do it. Her legs are shaking, her hips are bucking and she's moaning like he's never heard before.
Afterwards he says "Wow, that was fantastic, your body never responded like that 50 years ago"
"Yeah, well" she says.... "50 years ago that wasn't an electric fence!" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why did the pervert cross the road?
Because his dick was stuck up the chicken  "
Why did the chewing gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken's foot  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A man and a woman started to have sex in the middle of a dark forest. After about 15 minutes, the man finally gets up and says, "Damn, I wish I had a flashlight!" The woman says, "Me too, you've been eating grass for the past ten minutes!" |
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"Why did the pervert cross the road?
Because his dick was stuck up the chicken
Why did the chewing gum cross the road?
It was stuck to the chicken's foot "
Why did the cigarette end cross the road.? |
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