FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Unjustified blocking
Unjustified blocking
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By *our Hero OP Man
over a year ago
south Oxfordshire |
It’s only happened a couple of times to me but I find it quite bizarre that someone instantly blocks you for just sending them a very polite, well thought out introduction message! I rarely message people but when I do I make sure I’ve fully read their profile, it’s always well considered and I’m always very polite, as I believe everyone should be.
If one isn’t interested then just reply or delete the message, I’m never offended by that at all. Surely however there’s no need to just trigger the block button. Is that their way of saying fuck off you creep?!
I’d be very interested to hear peoples thoughts on this…..  |
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By *our Hero OP Man
over a year ago
south Oxfordshire |
"Something like that 
They clearly don’t want to hear from you again  "
Well obviously so, but if they didn’t reply then they wouldn’t hear from me again anyway as I’d certainly never pester somebody. |
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"Something like that
They clearly don’t want to hear from you again
Well obviously so, but if they didn’t reply then they wouldn’t hear from me again anyway as I’d certainly never pester somebody. "
But many men do.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Something like that
They clearly don’t want to hear from you again
Well obviously so, but if they didn’t reply then they wouldn’t hear from me again anyway as I’d certainly never pester somebody. "
You know that but they have no way of knowing that. It isn't a reflection on you, it's a reflection on the many many men on here who don't take no for an answer. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Something like that
They clearly don’t want to hear from you again
Well obviously so, but if they didn’t reply then they wouldn’t hear from me again anyway as I’d certainly never pester somebody. "
But they don’t know that. A lot of people do send another message … |
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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
"Something like that
They clearly don’t want to hear from you again
Well obviously so, but if they didn’t reply then they wouldn’t hear from me again anyway as I’d certainly never pester somebody.
But many men do.
"
Many many men.
Sometimes I don't block people just to see how long they will keep having a one sided conversation |
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You may take it well, the deleting or no reply. But that person who blocked you may have had rude messages sent previously from other Men. So to ensure that doesn’t happen they’ve just blocked you.
It’s a kind of self defence from some on here who don’t take rejection well.
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"Something like that
They clearly don’t want to hear from you again
Well obviously so, but if they didn’t reply then they wouldn’t hear from me again anyway as I’d certainly never pester somebody.
But many men do.
Many many men.
Sometimes I don't block people just to see how long they will keep having a one sided conversation "
As long as it takes to make you change your mind and see what you are missing out on  |
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By *our Hero OP Man
over a year ago
south Oxfordshire |
"I think you’re taking it too personally.
It’s a tool the site provides, and some people use it to narrow down the field they search in. "
Yes I’m sure you’re probably right! I guess I just associate the block button with rudeness or being hassled, not with politeness.
I’m probably just a sensitive soul!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I used to try to reply and say no thanks or just delete or ignore but then you get the same man popping up trying his luck a 3rd , fourth or fifth time . Imagine this on a large scale daily ...it gets exhausting ..if I'm not interested at all I just block. You also get men who you say no thanks to , then they want to know why or start begging ....
Blocking is used to eliminate the possibility of further communication from that individual and as someone rightfully said on this thread you can't determine what is justifiable as this will inevitably vary per person  |
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By *our Hero OP Man
over a year ago
south Oxfordshire |
"Something like that
They clearly don’t want to hear from you again
Well obviously so, but if they didn’t reply then they wouldn’t hear from me again anyway as I’d certainly never pester somebody.
But many men do.
Many many men.
Sometimes I don't block people just to see how long they will keep having a one sided conversation "
I talk to myself at home so I wouldn’t have much fun doing it on here!! |
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"I think you’re taking it too personally.
It’s a tool the site provides, and some people use it to narrow down the field they search in.
Yes I’m sure you’re probably right! I guess I just associate the block button with rudeness or being hassled, not with politeness.
I’m probably just a sensitive soul! "
You're assuming other people's motives, that way lies madness and sleepless nights. |
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By *our Hero OP Man
over a year ago
south Oxfordshire |
"I used to try to reply and say no thanks or just delete or ignore but then you get the same man popping up trying his luck a 3rd , fourth or fifth time . Imagine this on a large scale daily ...it gets exhausting ..if I'm not interested at all I just block. You also get men who you say no thanks to , then they want to know why or start begging ....
Blocking is used to eliminate the possibility of further communication from that individual and as someone rightfully said on this thread you can't determine what is justifiable as this will inevitably vary per person "
Yes, that does make sense. |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
"Something like that
They clearly don’t want to hear from you again
Well obviously so, but if they didn’t reply then they wouldn’t hear from me again anyway as I’d certainly never pester somebody. "
You probably wouldn't. But plenty will pester or even abuse. Andvtgeyvhsvevno way of knowing which category you falk in to. I wouldn't take it personally and I wouldn't let it bother you |
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"It’s only happened a couple of times to me but I find it quite bizarre that someone instantly blocks you for just sending them a very polite, well thought out introduction message! I rarely message people but when I do I make sure I’ve fully read their profile, it’s always well considered and I’m always very polite, as I believe everyone should be.
If one isn’t interested then just reply or delete the message, I’m never offended by that at all. Surely however there’s no need to just trigger the block button. Is that their way of saying fuck off you creep?!
I’d be very interested to hear peoples thoughts on this….. "
It's their way.
For whatever reason they chose to block.
Could be to stop you messaging. Could be so they don't see your profile in their search/feed. Could simply be their way of filing rejections.
It is what it is |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"It’s only happened a couple of times to me but I find it quite bizarre that someone instantly blocks you for just sending them a very polite, well thought out introduction message! I rarely message people but when I do I make sure I’ve fully read their profile, it’s always well considered and I’m always very polite, as I believe everyone should be.
If one isn’t interested then just reply or delete the message, I’m never offended by that at all. Surely however there’s no need to just trigger the block button. Is that their way of saying fuck off you creep?!
I’d be very interested to hear peoples thoughts on this….. "
Don't take it personally.
We block people before they know we even exist. We do it when browsing profiles when looking for meets to make sure they don't show up again in future searches if they're 100% mot what we're looking for.
It's just a permanent filter. Nothing more and nothing personal.
A |
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First line of my profile is send me a wink and I will block you. This is done to out those that can't be arsed to read it I'm currently blocking around 6 a day and I bet they have no idea why they have been blocked |
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"People in demand (women and couples usually) get lots of messages so it's quicker to block rather than reply. Block in return op so they don't appear in future searches. Good luck."
How do you block in return? They've blocked you, you can't see them
Just move on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I used to try to reply and say no thanks or just delete or ignore but then you get the same man popping up trying his luck a 3rd , fourth or fifth time . Imagine this on a large scale daily ...it gets exhausting ..if I'm not interested at all I just block. You also get men who you say no thanks to , then they want to know why or start begging ....
Blocking is used to eliminate the possibility of further communication from that individual and as someone rightfully said on this thread you can't determine what is justifiable as this will inevitably vary per person "
Exactly this. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I got blocked the other day by a couple, who I had a very enjoyable meet with, after I messaged asking if they fancied meeting again sometime.
It happens. Just have to put it behind you and not take it personally. |
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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago
Calderdale innit |
Op it could be because when you delete ,then the messages can start staying not your type or not interested?.it just saves any potential abuse ,I'm not sting you would,but many do & a stranger has no idea what you're like etc. |
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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in Co. Down |
You may find it unjustified but the person blocking usually has a reason for blocking,it could be they didn't like something on your profile or the message or it could be they were in bad form couldn't be bothered dealing with messages and replies so they decided you weren't someone they would want to meet so they blocked you.
It's not a big deal block back and move on. The best thing is to delete sent messages anyhow so you don't go checking to see if they are read or not.Then it won't bother you if they block you. |
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I've got blocked when I didn't even instigate the message. I just took a little too long to reply or said I wouldn't be happy to do something they wanted me to. No skin off my nose, I'd rather know where I stand and who to avoid anyway. |
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By *our Hero OP Man
over a year ago
south Oxfordshire |
A lot of people saying “why should someone justify blocking someone else?” You’re all absolutely correct, I guess I just hadn’t really thought of it that way!
There’s so many nice people on here and I thank you for your thoughts and input |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A lot of people saying “why should someone justify blocking someone else?” You’re all absolutely correct, I guess I just hadn’t really thought of it that way!
There’s so many nice people on here and I thank you for your thoughts and input "
Thats the best way to look at things, Focus on the people you do interact with rather than those you don't. |
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By *ihmMan
over a year ago
West Wales |
"It’s only happened a couple of times to me but I find it quite bizarre that someone instantly blocks you for just sending them a very polite, well thought out introduction message! I rarely message people but when I do I make sure I’ve fully read their profile, it’s always well considered and I’m always very polite, as I believe everyone should be.
If one isn’t interested then just reply or delete the message, I’m never offended by that at all. Surely however there’s no need to just trigger the block button. Is that their way of saying fuck off you creep?!
I’d be very interested to hear peoples thoughts on this….. "
Imagine you are a couple or single woman, with quite a lot more messages to deal with than you or I will be troubled by on a daily basis. You receive a message, it polite, considered and shows the sender has thoroughly read your profile, it has had a lot of effort put into it, which is appreciated, but you are not interested for whatever reason. You are faced with a choice, do you reply with a polite no thank you? This can lead to repeated messages from certain people who will take any reply as encouragement and as far as they are concerned a slightly open door. Do you just read and delete? Some will react badly because you haven't replied, remember all that effort they have invested in this message? As you have received this message from someone you don't know, how do you gauge what the response is going to be? What sort of person is on the other end of this message? A lot of couples, single ladies and indeed, single men choose to preempt the possibility of a negative response or persistent bothering by simply blocking. It saves everyone any ongoing bother. Why would the blocked party want to contact someone who doesn't want to be contacted? Why should anyone else spend all their time dealing with unsolicited messages back and forth? Block is a win all round. |
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By *abonWoman
over a year ago
L’boro/Ashby & Cheltenham |
"Something like that
They clearly don’t want to hear from you again
Well obviously so, but if they didn’t reply then they wouldn’t hear from me again anyway as I’d certainly never pester somebody.
But they don’t know that. A lot of people do send another message …"
I’ve had exactly the same message sent to me over and over again…just someone searching and pasting the same sentence each time. I just delete because I don’t like the cut and paste approach, and I don’t want to reply because that means they can always message you in the future. Some people are obviously more decisive than me! I have blocked tho when I am being bothered by someone. |
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At least half of those on my block list are there despite the fact I've never spoken to them at all or only exchanged one or two messages.
It's like another filter and keeps my local updates tidy and relevant.
Every block I've made is entirely justified regardless of the reason for it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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“Thank you for your kind message but unfortunately we don’t feel that you would suit us”.
“Why?”
We give out reasons.
“Stuck up C***s”
“Time wasters”
etc etc.
Block is just less troublesome.
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
OP, it's only personal if they have been interacting with you or meeting you and then block you. An introductory message is similar to a flyer posted through your front door. You don't read all of them - the first glance may tell you it's not something of interest.
I am blocked by many, and have blocked many. |
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By *adyJayneWoman
over a year ago
Burnleyish (She/They) |
"I got blocked the other day by a couple, who I had a very enjoyable meet with, after I messaged asking if they fancied meeting again sometime.
It happens. Just have to put it behind you and not take it personally."
Unfortunately, while one party may have enjoyed a meet, others may have been less than inclined.
I know I have had meets that didn't really float my boat, they were ok I guess and if the person has then, months or years later mailed to say "we had an amazing meet up for it again" I've thought back and decided it wasn't for me. |
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By *.L.0460.Woman
over a year ago
Bognor Regis |
There's always a reason!
If it's obvious he's not read my profile *block*
If I see something I really don't like in his profile *block*
If I'm not remotely attracted *block*
If he's not sent a pic & there aren't any on his profile *block*
If his message is too vulgar, over familiar or downright ridiculous *block*
Hell, I even check my 'who winked/looked at me' & block before they waste time messaging!!!
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If they're not interested in meeting you then they have done you a favour by blocking you, say in 3 to 6 months time, you stumble upon their profile and you forgotten that you had previously messaged them, then you would waste your time again writing out a personal message to them.
The block you took isnt personal |
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Stop focusing on the people who don’t want to meet you and just concentrate on people who do. Your whole FAB experience will be so much more richer for just shrugging off the negatives and focusing on the positives 
K |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I got blocked the other day by a couple, who I had a very enjoyable meet with, after I messaged asking if they fancied meeting again sometime.
It happens. Just have to put it behind you and not take it personally.
Unfortunately, while one party may have enjoyed a meet, others may have been less than inclined.
I know I have had meets that didn't really float my boat, they were ok I guess and if the person has then, months or years later mailed to say "we had an amazing meet up for it again" I've thought back and decided it wasn't for me."
Yeah, I get that. They genuinely seemed to enjoy it as much as me though! But hey-ho, that's how it goes! |
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Is there any such thing?
It might feel a bit harsh if you've been getting to know each other but at the end of the day it's every individuals prerogative.
If you get blocked shrug your shoulders & quit wasting your time. There's someone for everyone out there, it just takes a little time to find them |
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"It’s only happened a couple of times to me but I find it quite bizarre that someone instantly blocks you for just sending them a very polite, well thought out introduction message! I rarely message people but when I do I make sure I’ve fully read their profile, it’s always well considered and I’m always very polite, as I believe everyone should be.
If one isn’t interested then just reply or delete the message, I’m never offended by that at all. Surely however there’s no need to just trigger the block button. Is that their way of saying fuck off you creep?!
I’d be very interested to hear peoples thoughts on this…..
Don't take it personally.
We block people before they know we even exist. We do it when browsing profiles when looking for meets to make sure they don't show up again in future searches if they're 100% mot what we're looking for.
It's just a permanent filter. Nothing more and nothing personal.
A"
Exactly this |
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"It’s only happened a couple of times to me but I find it quite bizarre that someone instantly blocks you for just sending them a very polite, well thought out introduction message! I rarely message people but when I do I make sure I’ve fully read their profile, it’s always well considered and I’m always very polite, as I believe everyone should be.
If one isn’t interested then just reply or delete the message, I’m never offended by that at all. Surely however there’s no need to just trigger the block button. Is that their way of saying fuck off you creep?!
I’d be very interested to hear peoples thoughts on this….. "
It was justified to them. You don't get to dictate when people block you. |
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"What’s really horrible is when you have been chatting to someone for days/weeks, and you think you get on well…then they block you"
And then message you even though you’re blocked and can’t message them back |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Honestly, it's nothing to take personally or to heart.
It's a tool, that everyone can use to their liking for their own needs. I use it for clearing up my local feed, preventing messaging the same person by accident after realising it's a non starter from the last go round, or just nipping things succinctly in the bud when it's immediately clear it's a no go.
We're all here for our own selfish needs, and as long as we're not wasting anyone's time or being malicious this is the least of this places problems.
Don't take it too seriously, this isn't real life, just a very niche corner of the Internet.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's probably nothing personal...just a strategic block ...they're not interested and don't want to argue the point  this. It’s totally justified to the blocker perhaps not the blockee. "
Steve!!! Hi (waves) |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"What’s really horrible is when you have been chatting to someone for days/weeks, and you think you get on well…then they block you
And then message you even though you’re blocked and can’t message them back"
Except that can't happen. Regardless of who instigates a block neither party can view or message the other without the block being removed. They'd have to remove the block, message and then reinstate the block.
Which would be pretty odd behaviour....
A |
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» Add a new message to this topic
Don’t have to justify blocking. Unfortunately for the decent profiles, lots don’t take a delete or no thanks quite so well so just easier x
