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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I can laugh about it but I do find them embarrassing in the heat of the moment. I always have to clarify it was a fanny fart too just incase they think it was me passing wind from my rectum. I just call them fanny farts. |
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I had an experiance where an ex was all up for it and had some knee high socks on and nothing else. I started going down there with each leg high up in each hand. Next thing I know a humongous fanny fart hit me and I swear it made my hair fly back.
I laughed and said it was ok and she then asked me to leave and that relationship ended.
Still see her now and then and just smile |
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"I had an experiance where an ex was all up for it and had some knee high socks on and nothing else. I started going down there with each leg high up in each hand. Next thing I know a humongous fanny fart hit me and I swear it made my hair fly back.
I laughed and said it was ok and she then asked me to leave and that relationship ended.
Still see her now and then and just smile "
Her fanny rejected you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can laugh about it but I do find them embarrassing in the heat of the moment. I always have to clarify it was a fanny fart too just incase they think it was me passing wind from my rectum. I just call them fanny farts. "
I don’t mean to laugh but can not help it, mainly the clarification part  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had an experiance where an ex was all up for it and had some knee high socks on and nothing else. I started going down there with each leg high up in each hand. Next thing I know a humongous fanny fart hit me and I swear it made my hair fly back.
I laughed and said it was ok and she then asked me to leave and that relationship ended.
Still see her now and then and just smile "
Oh man this cracked me up  |
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I have happy happy memories of an ex who could do them on demand. She could also use the same excellent muscle control to “squirt” water when in the bath (ie the same mechanism, but with water rather than air - not actual squirting).
It was one of the many impressive things about her. |
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I believe that ‘Queef’ is the most commonly accepted, (and additionally, rather delightfully endearing) term to describe vaginal flatus.
I have known many ladies to be incredibly embarrassed by them but have always reassured them that they (the emitted sounds) are perfectly natural.
…..before laughing and pointing at them cruelly whilst mimicking farting sounds with my mouth (I’m obviously joking about the last part good folks) |
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Queefs.....
I always clarify that it was my 'blurt box' and not a fart.
I NEVER do them unless the male has caused them ...... if he went in and stayed in they wouldn't exist.
It's the upside down in and out position that does it for me.....
Hate them. Not remotely funny or sexy .... just a nuisance. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Queefs.....
I always clarify that it was my 'blurt box' and not a fart.
I NEVER do them unless the male has caused them ...... if he went in and stayed in they wouldn't exist.
It's the upside down in and out position that does it for me.....
Hate them. Not remotely funny or sexy .... just a nuisance."
Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I hate it, makes me loathe doggy as I know how it's going to end  "
I love it!! - so sexy when it is a wet juicy sound - makes me want to bend down and lick  |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"Queefs.....
I always clarify that it was my 'blurt box' and not a fart.
I NEVER do them unless the male has caused them ...... if he went in and stayed in they wouldn't exist.
It's the upside down in and out position that does it for me.....
Hate them. Not remotely funny or sexy .... just a nuisance."
I may start calling them Granny Trumpet’s |
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"Queefs.....
I always clarify that it was my 'blurt box' and not a fart.
I NEVER do them unless the male has caused them ...... if he went in and stayed in they wouldn't exist.
It's the upside down in and out position that does it for me.....
Hate them. Not remotely funny or sexy .... just a nuisance."
Quickie tip Granny; Pop on some loud music whenever you have sexual relations 
I always find that Tchaikovsky‘s 1812 Overture is particularly expedient in this regards and you can additionally experience the joy in choosing to time and release your queefs in perfect sync with the grand finale as the cannons fire off triumphantly….  |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"I can laugh about it but I do find them embarrassing in the heat of the moment. I always have to clarify it was a fanny fart too just incase they think it was me passing wind from my rectum. I just call them fanny farts. "
I can pass of normal farts ad fanny farts because they don't smell
I still don't know why my farts don't smell. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Embarrassing but so funny. Which results in me getting a fit of giggles and spoiling the mood
Giggles are part of the fun surely
In my head yes lol "
I laughed too and there’s much worse could happen  |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"I can pass of normal farts ad fanny farts because they don't smell
I still don't know why my farts don't smell.
You have covid!"
For 30 years?? I have confirmation from someone they are aroma-less |
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By *etcplCouple
over a year ago
Gapping Fanny |
"I can pass of normal farts ad fanny farts because they don't smell
I still don't know why my farts don't smell.
You have covid!
For 30 years?? I have confirmation from someone they are aroma-less "
Patient zero!
And they said it was from eating bats in China…! |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"I can pass of normal farts ad fanny farts because they don't smell
I still don't know why my farts don't smell.
You have covid!
For 30 years?? I have confirmation from someone they are aroma-less
Patient zero!
And they said it was from eating bats in China…!"
Bat would probably make my farts smell |
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By *ad NannaWoman
over a year ago
East London |
"It happened to me while having a mini gangbang, during doggy style, i wanted to die at the time, still trying to find the humour in it 3 weeks later "
Doggy is the worse position for getting them, especially if your head is down. Any air driven in has to come out. |
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"It happened to me while having a mini gangbang, during doggy style, i wanted to die at the time, still trying to find the humour in it 3 weeks later
Doggy is the worse position for getting them, especially if your head is down. Any air driven in has to come out."
Have made a note for next time to avoid that position. It was far worse in a room with 6 men, so I basically died 6 times over |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It happened to me while having a mini gangbang, during doggy style, i wanted to die at the time, still trying to find the humour in it 3 weeks later
Doggy is the worse position for getting them, especially if your head is down. Any air driven in has to come out.
Have made a note for next time to avoid that position. It was far worse in a room with 6 men, so I basically died 6 times over "
Lol |
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Was in 69 with fwb, deep throated him and fanny farted in his face - he jumped 
It would mostly happen after doggy, we’d change position and there you go, fanny farts galore, we’d both laugh and that would only make me do more! |
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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago
Travelling |
"Was in 69 with fwb, deep throated him and fanny farted in his face - he jumped
It would mostly happen after doggy, we’d change position and there you go, fanny farts galore, we’d both laugh and that would only make me do more! "
And that's so important! Being able to laugh about it and the silly little things that can often make us all feel embarrassed,especially at such a moment. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had an experiance where an ex was all up for it and had some knee high socks on and nothing else. I started going down there with each leg high up in each hand. Next thing I know a humongous fanny fart hit me and I swear it made my hair fly back.
I laughed and said it was ok and she then asked me to leave and that relationship ended.
Still see her now and then and just smile "
Was just reading this is tears of laughter |
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By *ancer36Woman
over a year ago
Stirling |
Don’t have an alternative name for them but still find them hilarious more than embarrassing - happened to me once when on all fours wearing a lead and collar, my fwb was behind me about to enter and pulled on the lead, causing a rather loud one to pop out…the timing was so coincidental that we just rolled about laughing xx |
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"Queefs.....
I always clarify that it was my 'blurt box' and not a fart.
I NEVER do them unless the male has caused them ...... if he went in and stayed in they wouldn't exist.
It's the upside down in and out position that does it for me.....
Hate them. Not remotely funny or sexy .... just a nuisance.
I may start calling them Granny Trumpet’s"
Okay but only you. No one I've fumbled with calls me Granny.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I find them so funny. But when it happens and I laugh, the girl gets upset but I can’t help my self to laugh. Or if I’m in the zone doing my thing and it happens. The mood goes and it just becomes funny |
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"Queefs.....
I always clarify that it was my 'blurt box' and not a fart.
I NEVER do them unless the male has caused them ...... if he went in and stayed in they wouldn't exist.
It's the upside down in and out position that does it for me.....
Hate them. Not remotely funny or sexy .... just a nuisance.
Quickie tip Granny; Pop on some loud music whenever you have sexual relations
I always find that Tchaikovsky‘s 1812 Overture is particularly expedient in this regards and you can additionally experience the joy in choosing to time and release your queefs in perfect sync with the grand finale as the cannons fire off triumphantly…. "
Good idea........ though I think the opening revs of Leader of the Pack would be a better bet..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Was in 69 with fwb, deep throated him and fanny farted in his face - he jumped
It would mostly happen after doggy, we’d change position and there you go, fanny farts galore, we’d both laugh and that would only make me do more! "
Brilliant!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Queefs.....
I always clarify that it was my 'blurt box' and not a fart.
I NEVER do them unless the male has caused them ...... if he went in and stayed in they wouldn't exist.
It's the upside down in and out position that does it for me.....
Hate them. Not remotely funny or sexy .... just a nuisance.
I may start calling them Granny Trumpet’s
Okay but only you. No one I've fumbled with calls me Granny.... "
You could sound posh with a double double-barrelled name with the above gent’s suggestion….how about also considering ‘Granny-Crumpet Fanny-Trumpet’? |
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